tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-51318785124158532712024-03-05T10:05:21.345-08:00Hellmouth FolliesBernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-46598203811828093862009-02-17T16:50:00.000-08:002009-02-17T16:52:28.145-08:00Close Your EyesAn enterprising young college student plays the Buffy/Angel theme...<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ClfARj6S1gs&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ClfARj6S1gs&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-35201379472343214212009-02-14T14:05:00.000-08:002009-02-14T15:27:56.499-08:00The Dark Age<h3>Season Two, Episode Eight</h3><br />2/9/09<br /><br />Welcome back, Hellmouthers! <font color=purple>SHE</font color> is super-excited about her Valentine's Day knitting books, and <font color=red>HE</font color> is super-excited about his new pens. In this episode, we learn how not to treat head injuries, how to lose the security deposit on your apartment, and about the point of an Onslow.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJZQS95E0akDAwb69xCxKh_c6aalEZR-cOqyzDRxrgJq433mQHJQ2fBfidIVqY29EyHQT69XTnONzn2XiRFKmOmRimj5a9zFLrojpJvXWWiQiUZBsVhT-wvQDzzG7K3YAzwr45my1zyWM/s1600-h/Murder+and+Aerobics.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 152px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJZQS95E0akDAwb69xCxKh_c6aalEZR-cOqyzDRxrgJq433mQHJQ2fBfidIVqY29EyHQT69XTnONzn2XiRFKmOmRimj5a9zFLrojpJvXWWiQiUZBsVhT-wvQDzzG7K3YAzwr45my1zyWM/s200/Murder+and+Aerobics.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302782330901149106" /></a><br /><h3>Murder and Aerobics</h3> <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The rapid plinky piano music always spells <em>trouble!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Plus the guy looking scared. Run, guy! Wait! Is that Jayne!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Too short. Don’t talk to the night janitor with muttonchops!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And the bald head. He doesn’t look so good.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He stepped on a crack, I think. There goes his mother’s back?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Was that my stomach growling? No, that was just a zombie moaning.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So basically Buffy’s music killed somebody…that’s some pretty unfortunate irony.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was going to say aerobics killed this man, but you’re right. it was the music.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Meanwhile Diedre turns into Double Dare goop.<br />Ew.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Mind Games</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4I6HA4jw9htP3lVJarnHoPk7Gxh5JaS_IFWKZ3ctfP7wzw0u814zlc6_D2jZ1575tqIXB2l00bt3-n28cZhM2yTpOwIZEE-EHH97rBCTKnV9zBYA8FhKqaXEPhx3x6CZwDu0_x5Kbc7E/s1600-h/U2+Giles.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 152px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4I6HA4jw9htP3lVJarnHoPk7Gxh5JaS_IFWKZ3ctfP7wzw0u814zlc6_D2jZ1575tqIXB2l00bt3-n28cZhM2yTpOwIZEE-EHH97rBCTKnV9zBYA8FhKqaXEPhx3x6CZwDu0_x5Kbc7E/s200/U2+Giles.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302782832119850706" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When Giles has nightmares, he dreams of U2, apparently.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Have you played “Anywhere but here” lately?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t even know how to respond safely to that. Funny that Willow fantasizes about John Cusack…isn’t he gay, too?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No! John Cusack is <em>not </em>gay.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh wait, that’s <em>Mathew Broderick</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You can tell this show is old, because the teenagers are wanting to be eating ziti with John Cusack.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“There should be more math. This could be mathier.”</font color> I feel the same way about English. This could be Englisher.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigaNidGRB-WeLG-qNAbVBXuTlHLimqtr63FVKpmrGK-8kzJPOzRhOFx0PeHeozTKdXLp9Bnh4gpQ1J4PL4nLFczaBSs_gWHFIXuG8__g4xkfl0FQKihWF1kknqJlFR1qE1Nkg9QvMAa3s/s1600-h/juicebox+xander.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 134px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigaNidGRB-WeLG-qNAbVBXuTlHLimqtr63FVKpmrGK-8kzJPOzRhOFx0PeHeozTKdXLp9Bnh4gpQ1J4PL4nLFczaBSs_gWHFIXuG8__g4xkfl0FQKihWF1kknqJlFR1qE1Nkg9QvMAa3s/s200/juicebox+xander.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302783083423388866" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Nice juicebox, Xander. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s like a six-year old.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I want to know which Forester book is it? <em>Remains of the Day? Howard’s End?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Which book would Giles have loaned Jenny?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hmm. Good question. I could see him as the butler from <em>Remains of the Day</em>, and Jenny as that wacky woman from <em>Howard’s End</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Jenny said he’s a sexy fuddy duddy. Giles and Calendar sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSRCzLSM3yw1_J_QpK_sKK1CLRzR0R0_x212ZOafPgDpO-nZ3mLwvuSW8UXb4eW8MQEJ2N5k6t-Pf-huEt3A9Mv5l2o_Q6Mk7bLj7UwzGszT1ksNC5TM8bnRqEjGE4nq-om4-sQT3nOKQ/s1600-h/Jenny+totally+wants+the+sex.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 151px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSRCzLSM3yw1_J_QpK_sKK1CLRzR0R0_x212ZOafPgDpO-nZ3mLwvuSW8UXb4eW8MQEJ2N5k6t-Pf-huEt3A9Mv5l2o_Q6Mk7bLj7UwzGszT1ksNC5TM8bnRqEjGE4nq-om4-sQT3nOKQ/s200/Jenny+totally+wants+the+sex.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302784694514258834" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> What are you, six? She wants to see him <em>squirm.</em> Dude! She totally wants the <em>sex! Dude!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And it was so nice when you said that the first time.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I know I’ve talked a lot about Jenny’s proclivities, but you have to admit, she’s got it bad right here. Do you admit it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Her pheremones were reaching out and grabbing him in the junk.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t believe you just said that.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You told me to admit it.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>A Homicide</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgreXPCgAnNkD8VaA25aUbjup_V0tyuPEZ2KZhuUNNOnL6OTQUv0ifVVLg7FU_K8ZkYokYRwHUEIsvcdTpH9EFu-E8WNu7LMjkxQY7OgPvldNY_1IsMhVtH93QjSsu5HOG4RDv5rPNoHwU/s1600-h/lippy+cordelia.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 148px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgreXPCgAnNkD8VaA25aUbjup_V0tyuPEZ2KZhuUNNOnL6OTQUv0ifVVLg7FU_K8ZkYokYRwHUEIsvcdTpH9EFu-E8WNu7LMjkxQY7OgPvldNY_1IsMhVtH93QjSsu5HOG4RDv5rPNoHwU/s200/lippy+cordelia.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302783683792528754" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Lippy Cordelia. Cordelia is so lippy. Would you really enjoy having a lippy Cordelia in your class?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What makes you think I don’t? Cordelia gets a special pass, though. I love it. Cordy comes in, stays, and leaves without a clue. She never knows.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What’s more important is that there’s no concern. She doesn’t care to figure out what the heck is going on.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It isn’t about her.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Blood Drive</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOWzD4FmaLTjBnwUJXefgsdandwSZFQuDpS438ejDKb2JoCFuwAdR_82ZGzS-h5ugBFF1OLHfrFvfLu5wkkjlnf5VhSdxKuYpRqhlJFLhtwP4VnjwM5sjyf-HNq7ZN2yzcEhBv5gCMOUg/s1600-h/blood+drive.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 149px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOWzD4FmaLTjBnwUJXefgsdandwSZFQuDpS438ejDKb2JoCFuwAdR_82ZGzS-h5ugBFF1OLHfrFvfLu5wkkjlnf5VhSdxKuYpRqhlJFLhtwP4VnjwM5sjyf-HNq7ZN2yzcEhBv5gCMOUg/s200/blood+drive.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302784174837526594" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did Buffy drive to the hospital? She’s standing next to what looks like her mother’s car.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, no sense in letting it all go to waste!<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Angel says <font color=yellow>“it’s delivery day. Everybody knows about delivery day.”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They’re a tightly knit vampire community in Sunnydale. I’m surprised that with all the violence in Sunnydale that all the blood they need for the month fits in a cooler.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, I’m sure they complain all the time about shortages. Just like every other whiny hospital.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfBsjBxof4qWFJJoISY492XT3Ee1Ru3s_O1bnMV-hD-PkpaakHo0xvn7cI_FfgAjxuPl4c0MoCU008SAGihq_2dd5fwbdEZ6LWHIek1583d8s26TISUCjTGITzLBqtYE10AdhJWGESx6M/s1600-h/Onslow.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 149px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfBsjBxof4qWFJJoISY492XT3Ee1Ru3s_O1bnMV-hD-PkpaakHo0xvn7cI_FfgAjxuPl4c0MoCU008SAGihq_2dd5fwbdEZ6LWHIek1583d8s26TISUCjTGITzLBqtYE10AdhJWGESx6M/s200/Onslow.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302785144287822882" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Aw, nice.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Thanks, Onslow. Which reminds me <a href="http://www.atimetoknit.com/d_k_ONSLOW.html">what I want for my birthday…</a> <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is this the first time we have seen Giles’s apartment? I don’t remember.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah? There are steps leading down to Giles’s apartment, but there are steps going up to the apartment complex.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Trippy.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Old Friends</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHXxQ5f5uBduJMnmbA0JXyo4pz94BWiInigwwFEDiy44rgmo8X8klqKft6buVcSqiY2M2B23jnsDSR9VgVnepzpXeZ_yG2Wo5i6cMspQwi1TVntNVDBsBDLp6xfqtHuLo4ha263fL1xdk/s1600-h/Giles+youre+back.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 145px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHXxQ5f5uBduJMnmbA0JXyo4pz94BWiInigwwFEDiy44rgmo8X8klqKft6buVcSqiY2M2B23jnsDSR9VgVnepzpXeZ_yG2Wo5i6cMspQwi1TVntNVDBsBDLp6xfqtHuLo4ha263fL1xdk/s200/Giles+youre+back.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302786016663671522" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He has the mark. Zombie rising!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“So. You’re back.”</font color> Nice <em>Apocalypse Now</em> moment with the water bowl. Whedon uses that again later at the end of Season 4 with Xander’s dream.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How does the zombie get out of the drawer? It’s not like there’s a latch on the inside.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe it does. Maybe they have a lot of bodies that don’t turn out to be dead after all. Maybe it’s a precaution.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So they make the drawers easy to open from the inside?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sorry, we thought you were dead!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> La la! We’ll be more careful next time!<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinpKuCyC53do-q2BfP9qOJT4m13K92WJYbDKxzZczjpJwTuxOjfeMeAzZz85vPOk1MjjfPOGV75VfSZr2m31CjMDE4zuCD2h9qUzuNjtAHKqVMWO8SGbKyPZzIOoC40Dkts-UsIFcclI8/s1600-h/xander+huh+did+i+fall+asleep.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinpKuCyC53do-q2BfP9qOJT4m13K92WJYbDKxzZczjpJwTuxOjfeMeAzZz85vPOk1MjjfPOGV75VfSZr2m31CjMDE4zuCD2h9qUzuNjtAHKqVMWO8SGbKyPZzIOoC40Dkts-UsIFcclI8/s200/xander+huh+did+i+fall+asleep.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302786608225645810" /></a><br /><font color=yellow>“Okay class, the first thing we’re going to do is…Buffy!”<br />“Did I fall asleep already?”</font color><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Ethan</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_C0B3fbufYxVlQsxmEmF5ERJ9V-EQ9rYndMdQtMTDUUttzpaY_5uS1SwncIZAkS9lOmjUY7i2M1a1MqBgDWBfPv2d_2gc2llyXuMuZuk5C7qD5jc1_BhHs-4kK70INvd2WDyE4A8CTqo/s1600-h/big+ole+library.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 148px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_C0B3fbufYxVlQsxmEmF5ERJ9V-EQ9rYndMdQtMTDUUttzpaY_5uS1SwncIZAkS9lOmjUY7i2M1a1MqBgDWBfPv2d_2gc2llyXuMuZuk5C7qD5jc1_BhHs-4kK70INvd2WDyE4A8CTqo/s200/big+ole+library.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302786992674974722" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There are a lot more stacks in this library than one thinks!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s hard to find people in a library<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I mean, seriously. I thought there were only a few. I guess there’s more.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTBtPn6mw4q8mRE4FT002wtrh5gBaxzijhw4JtN5aaYBazSXCWQgycdx2AMWE5Bw9_feg7UDfNG9vsUeKmVU5f4ngWxDf0tlJUo_gjuQ_rdcAkyBrDthSVjeBD7NaBviHwCZy_habuUwc/s1600-h/wow+lots+more+stacks.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 149px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTBtPn6mw4q8mRE4FT002wtrh5gBaxzijhw4JtN5aaYBazSXCWQgycdx2AMWE5Bw9_feg7UDfNG9vsUeKmVU5f4ngWxDf0tlJUo_gjuQ_rdcAkyBrDthSVjeBD7NaBviHwCZy_habuUwc/s200/wow+lots+more+stacks.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302787230929462994" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you notice the doors leading to yet more stacks?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No. I thought this library was like some interdimensional vortex where it expanded or contracted depending on the needs of the story.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>What’s Going On?</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD1yJzBnXMpWbhGdNkEkduX8ocEjrPL8vp1XCaA0Vens3xq0Gpw4fHxhxNPsnTmwWO4YbH1cryX0b9uIlUELer6A-GEbNxjBGxqNzVtlguZ3E9RNFU32I4gK_FS_IgkXY17Rv2el-HvZY/s1600-h/Cordy+kicks.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 151px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD1yJzBnXMpWbhGdNkEkduX8ocEjrPL8vp1XCaA0Vens3xq0Gpw4fHxhxNPsnTmwWO4YbH1cryX0b9uIlUELer6A-GEbNxjBGxqNzVtlguZ3E9RNFU32I4gK_FS_IgkXY17Rv2el-HvZY/s200/Cordy+kicks.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302788578051149906" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What’s going on? What’s coming? What’s going on? <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander gets tossed off by Ethan rather easily, but then Ethan gets dropped by a Cordy kick to the shins.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me. That power in her kicks must come from all the cheerleading.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think it speaks volumes about Xander’s wimpiness. Look, our second library cage detainee…is Phillip the Zombie! Yay!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Also the first one to escape the library cage.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think they forgot to lock it. Nobody noticed the big cat eye thing. Now how could a roomful of people miss that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m sure every time they made out, the kids averted their eyes.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinIiZR6yLndE_6QqP9P0cOyt_CWwzJlmRk_7Qq5tqnoul0zmbOlSRt1vXoPNggM4OvMIK4M6KMWaf77-6Jg76-Vnsj3rm4JIfz-7gqJer6VCK8M6p3jEEr-Nl6vYh5VZNjbDrwf4-DIxE/s1600-h/green+eye+jenny.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinIiZR6yLndE_6QqP9P0cOyt_CWwzJlmRk_7Qq5tqnoul0zmbOlSRt1vXoPNggM4OvMIK4M6KMWaf77-6Jg76-Vnsj3rm4JIfz-7gqJer6VCK8M6p3jEEr-Nl6vYh5VZNjbDrwf4-DIxE/s200/green+eye+jenny.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302788780102845666" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>The Mark of Eyghon</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZ1MKZ7m-B1cQ6GF6KLGFuArsHaqxcYHseoI8A9cpe3OaHDPQQGSNqovCr22JkBWXPrvhUzIfdg7Do2dm1g5eb0YW6uvSEvygl_syBRVPtC70eUozXs7GFvz8787FlWoexibiwjyQ7at4/s1600-h/Eyghon+take+me+away.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 151px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZ1MKZ7m-B1cQ6GF6KLGFuArsHaqxcYHseoI8A9cpe3OaHDPQQGSNqovCr22JkBWXPrvhUzIfdg7Do2dm1g5eb0YW6uvSEvygl_syBRVPtC70eUozXs7GFvz8787FlWoexibiwjyQ7at4/s200/Eyghon+take+me+away.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302789787137135154" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles was very firm. The rest of the episode will be teenagers hanging out and not worrying about the Mark of Eyghon.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’ve been waiting to say this…<em>Eyghon, take me away! </em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sigh.<br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/HvE65VOcAL0&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HvE65VOcAL0&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey look, Cordelia is reporting for duty! First time?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s really kind of sweet of her.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> In a stupid, useless sort of way.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5cs6zhlBCjK82mNjfzcYxzNKYOUsW_6LQBZ19rotq2TQV5_ET_aSSgKQQgCQVhQmKNhyx4vE-zVdkVDjzVI_t6AE6MrzQEKXXqE7X_GsCFVAEufrge36tYZFU3Z0iFZOBeSvqjcSTYjw/s1600-h/cordy+is+going+to+help.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 151px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5cs6zhlBCjK82mNjfzcYxzNKYOUsW_6LQBZ19rotq2TQV5_ET_aSSgKQQgCQVhQmKNhyx4vE-zVdkVDjzVI_t6AE6MrzQEKXXqE7X_GsCFVAEufrge36tYZFU3Z0iFZOBeSvqjcSTYjw/s200/cordy+is+going+to+help.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302790021142299794" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Possessed</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUmbYvdoNQU-klY4x1Y9hchaK8A015m4euoX454gAJNyE-F7NDwOyF7I8H3paq0opN9ebAtyfHAJHleRHBXDuwRvLnOJyvI0u7HeLNaOAXCGp68rsgLYNv1PAUFsXz7giusejmnVG7twE/s1600-h/give+a+head+injury+whiskey.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 148px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUmbYvdoNQU-klY4x1Y9hchaK8A015m4euoX454gAJNyE-F7NDwOyF7I8H3paq0opN9ebAtyfHAJHleRHBXDuwRvLnOJyvI0u7HeLNaOAXCGp68rsgLYNv1PAUFsXz7giusejmnVG7twE/s200/give+a+head+injury+whiskey.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302790451321397138" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nice lamp. Did you not notice Giles’s lamp?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was too busy grappling with Giles’s overreaction here. Oh <em>big deal</em>, Giles…she got pushed down by a zombie.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He goes a little weird in this story. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I thought “Halloween” did a better job of presenting Giles’s menacing younger days. And I was right there with Giles when he was doing the <em>Apocalypse Now</em> look in the mirror. But he gets a little wimpy here for my tastes.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> A lot of sniveling.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Dude!</em> embrace your inner bad boy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I learned from <em>CSI</em> that alcohol is not the best thing for a head injury. I think that was whiskey.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe he’s giving it to her to distract her from that horrible looking tattoo. It looks like a tuba stuck to a treble clef.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Personally, I wouldn’t want to be possessed by a tuba. I think that would be horrific.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay Jenny, didja haveta yank the cord out of the wall? You couldn’t just disconnect the jack?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> If she just disconnected the jack, then he could just plug it back in. Plus, he’ll lose the deposit, and that’s more evil. And look, first he serves alcohol, then tea. He gets her intoxicated, then tries to sober her up.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8PFr4OsWA_FipBErEkq7i8PIno8rKYm9F1fjf2Op7LG-yK4wfRgtQgtfCwVwMTD1B6XkNDZqMh3S_g2QOcC5tAE45qBVZRS7c1ojRKBb_JdUuwtN1lxBodrBhxZQ3TmmWencFwtEwkus/s1600-h/jenny+youre+just+like+a+woman.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 149px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8PFr4OsWA_FipBErEkq7i8PIno8rKYm9F1fjf2Op7LG-yK4wfRgtQgtfCwVwMTD1B6XkNDZqMh3S_g2QOcC5tAE45qBVZRS7c1ojRKBb_JdUuwtN1lxBodrBhxZQ3TmmWencFwtEwkus/s200/jenny+youre+just+like+a+woman.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302790867805897618" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> She says, <font color=yellow>“You’re like a woman, Ripper.”</font color> I’m beginning to believe it. Come on, Giles! Rally, man!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Pull yourself together!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Jenny/Eyghon’s face is going to be ketchup soup when it goes through that window. I don’t care how leathery your demon skin’s supposed to be.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why didn’t it take the door, except it wanted to make sure that security deposit was gone.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think it peed on the rug on the way out.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>History</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look! Giles used to look like Dave Coulier!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Who’s Dave Coulier?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The funny uncle from Full House. I put “funny uncle” in scare quotes, by the way.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He was cute when he was younger. He didn’t look threatening in any way.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-R4xsini2tmRAuLZWvZtsQq_Ul0tktsQYsptG9BL8mrhDfCBnsK648RJVBNL4sONlddGJU9pCwXV3xwZp9zZUMxWvNvSxd2rCFg44RV1WUdzd1mRsWCTBKGosG9fmUo1WrLMN-bDqlfk/s1600-h/uncle+joey.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-R4xsini2tmRAuLZWvZtsQq_Ul0tktsQYsptG9BL8mrhDfCBnsK648RJVBNL4sONlddGJU9pCwXV3xwZp9zZUMxWvNvSxd2rCFg44RV1WUdzd1mRsWCTBKGosG9fmUo1WrLMN-bDqlfk/s200/uncle+joey.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302791476098804610" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dave Coulier was never cute. Oh, you probably means Giles. Hold on loosely, Giles! You’re going to lose control!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m still loving the lamp.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Nobody cares about the lamp.<br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Initiation</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihyphenhyphenkwkoYtTtiOYVOyxzeEdoRdpoTkIvGQxHFPKNgdYDWZmYMurQdqpC5hAng7lwkhso2myrL8Oh520Yie8Uy3nWdqj2Nbh1JEIpz7HRAlPDZxcJxFcRF5M-BdWToKlBGGXS-cUJ3KoAkY/s1600-h/ethan+shows+his+tat.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 151px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihyphenhyphenkwkoYtTtiOYVOyxzeEdoRdpoTkIvGQxHFPKNgdYDWZmYMurQdqpC5hAng7lwkhso2myrL8Oh520Yie8Uy3nWdqj2Nbh1JEIpz7HRAlPDZxcJxFcRF5M-BdWToKlBGGXS-cUJ3KoAkY/s200/ethan+shows+his+tat.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302792434867870018" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What a dumbass. Never, never, <em>never</em> turn your back on Ethan!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ever ever.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like the line about how the stinging will go away once the searing pain kicks in.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I wonder if you have to have a special potion for your tattoo to summon demons.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like something you rub on it afterwards? Like a salve?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like something mixed in with the ink.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like on that episode of <em>The X-Files</em> when Scully gets that tattoo of the snake eating its own tail?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The ourobouros? Did that summon a demon?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t remember. It was hot, though.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Showdown</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRZbWpUa3a6qyoTlIpO2SrzJF4_fv9jS-3am1ZlW8aPonpNf58K7gn9K8j3gXlNEDbGZj2egHg3ZAOVGXtfFFv9Rd1FhFQZiuZim88S-NnbqmKTX6JWLcOum0AIwW91irMowwq_60wGLc/s1600-h/cordy+and+xander+throw+down.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 151px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRZbWpUa3a6qyoTlIpO2SrzJF4_fv9jS-3am1ZlW8aPonpNf58K7gn9K8j3gXlNEDbGZj2egHg3ZAOVGXtfFFv9Rd1FhFQZiuZim88S-NnbqmKTX6JWLcOum0AIwW91irMowwq_60wGLc/s200/cordy+and+xander+throw+down.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302792736549703746" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander is picking a fight with a girl. Well, that’s consistent.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordelia is right, too. She could take him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Just kick him in the shin. He’s such a girl.<br /> <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF-Bh5a9rcPxykTNrJHIoIGaj4kS_5y06t6T9jpsnoQxE5pFyEurQIIITh_jC25JLxtiRq_NlQn-ujyzbwlZb7ql8-BOs02_jh6nKnyTOp2SZF62v7njqr7ztBeDGMCJUqHParPodb8NA/s1600-h/jenny+elf+ears.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 152px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF-Bh5a9rcPxykTNrJHIoIGaj4kS_5y06t6T9jpsnoQxE5pFyEurQIIITh_jC25JLxtiRq_NlQn-ujyzbwlZb7ql8-BOs02_jh6nKnyTOp2SZF62v7njqr7ztBeDGMCJUqHParPodb8NA/s200/jenny+elf+ears.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302793009304291666" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look at Calendar now. Egad, those ears.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She looks like an evil elf.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe after she’s done killing everyone, she’ll build some toy trains!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or make cookies inside a tree!<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, you have to hand it to Ethan…it takes balls to pour acid on your arm.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> For our readers, I don’t recommend removing a tattoo by dumping acid on it.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>It’s Over</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim8BQoXipDsX5cv2WQaxaG2g5A9aM4UonU8IjTtC8rLRqJEE9BxcM1PgyGZzMwskeSgWqrxK_DchhJ0732UtNn4GP7Z04O6v3egByxwi_pS_pIiOqpSsrpqqTORnEI3iCXG6ZjEKnZLWQ/s1600-h/angel+fights+demon+I.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim8BQoXipDsX5cv2WQaxaG2g5A9aM4UonU8IjTtC8rLRqJEE9BxcM1PgyGZzMwskeSgWqrxK_DchhJ0732UtNn4GP7Z04O6v3egByxwi_pS_pIiOqpSsrpqqTORnEI3iCXG6ZjEKnZLWQ/s200/angel+fights+demon+I.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302793530384463842" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Finally Angel does something useful! Although it really doesn’t make up for killing Jenny later.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It just makes his relationship more confusing. I wonder how one kills a demon that’s in one’s body. Other than go all cartoony for a minute.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m sure there’s places where you can get a demonectomy. I think Angel’s just lazy.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So…Jenny’s skin goes back to normal? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Rather quickly, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Convenient for her, I suppose. Permanent disfigurement would have made Giles’s conundrum a lot easier to solve. “Yeah, let’s just be friends.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “I’m not loving the ears. Let’s just talk at work.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Apparently in Sunnydale, tattoo removal can actually be paid for with an allowance.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And if you’re trying to hide it from your mother, you can still wear spaghetti straps.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Check out Jenny distancing herself. Brrr! I would have thought Jenny would have been into the whole bad boy thing.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s a little fickle, isn’t she?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I guess she likes to be the bad boy. Way to blow all your cred, Giles.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPTjC4EJyaLV3Y69SbJw8NvY_Thr2_71wNsGkmEOLFDPmNN5IC80xLEhBB0Mu7ECIrn-r_zjuobxRcoKYSpnXQlT7sRrWSRtnkNiUnRW_Cs8xRjxPlg_KopeGeEQYmu2gwggAJDM-Ak4o/s1600-h/bay+city+giles.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 238px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPTjC4EJyaLV3Y69SbJw8NvY_Thr2_71wNsGkmEOLFDPmNN5IC80xLEhBB0Mu7ECIrn-r_zjuobxRcoKYSpnXQlT7sRrWSRtnkNiUnRW_Cs8xRjxPlg_KopeGeEQYmu2gwggAJDM-Ak4o/s320/bay+city+giles.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5302793928970686930" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Who were <em>The Bay City Rollers?</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Apparently they are not music. I think I’ve heard of them. When we were cleaning out my parents’ house, I found a bunch of crap. And I think I saw one of their records. I left it behind with <em>Captain and Teneille</em>, <em>Andy Griffith Sings…</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You probably could have sold it on <em>Ebay</em> because it’s rare and nobody likes it anymore.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, unlike you, I happen to have a conscience, and I would not do that to people who have not done me any harm.<br /><br /><font color=orange>[Editor's Note: Thanks to our new Photo Impact software, we no longer rely on other websites for the images you see here. But thanks go out to screencap-paradise for the use of their images in our postings before this point!]</font color><br /><br />Next time: <font color=yellow>"What's My Line?--Part One</font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-49245705183826043502009-01-21T07:07:00.000-08:002009-02-14T15:30:54.112-08:00Lie to Me<h3>Season Two, Episode Seven</h3> <br />1/17/09<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE</font color> likes knitting. <font color=red>HE</font color> likes imabic pentameter. In this episode, we learn about the Hobbesian nature of Sunnydale, how existentialism trumps brain cancer, and George Clinton.<br /><br /><h3>Angel’s Heart</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYuCBYv_-_71KyDtPOL9K-szg4IiI30ud4kK0J1_e9CM2kcbLKnBsxuXZIWuDmFwn7JiosBXtI8SVGvwowtXmyHwyk-bCmgc87FtmGwADMHPjqnSJ92Eqy9NVRSC1O15yjPcpBIJypY20/s1600-h/LieToMe_005.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYuCBYv_-_71KyDtPOL9K-szg4IiI30ud4kK0J1_e9CM2kcbLKnBsxuXZIWuDmFwn7JiosBXtI8SVGvwowtXmyHwyk-bCmgc87FtmGwADMHPjqnSJ92Eqy9NVRSC1O15yjPcpBIJypY20/s200/LieToMe_005.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293780274089810626" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look, it’s a magical playground! Nobody is on that merry-go-round, and yet it’s <em>moving</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m getting dizzy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s why you don’t play video games.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> True. There is nothing creepier than meeting Drusilla in a playground after dark.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This kid should be running like mad from the crazy woman in her nightgown.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Kids just don’t have any sense anymore.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a nifty rescue by Angel Just pops out of nowhere.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And he’s more frightening –looking than Drusilla is.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Geez, <em>insecure </em>much, Buffy? Nikki Woods the slayer would have been all up in his junk, tearing him a new vamphole.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> His other relationships are a source of insecurity for her. She never has to meet Darla, fortunately.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjVLTARppxfL72agFedBYIVaM95YeYot-s5-6V_vSR1_3uFS-Z54dRbYzJYptjG2vxjfd_0X3b22brhZgiPnbY25o6OWu-FCfH-Jgm8XRgKuSf_6gVF_BVTpC16STdhySABXuCxJZtxqc/s1600-h/LieToMe_037.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjVLTARppxfL72agFedBYIVaM95YeYot-s5-6V_vSR1_3uFS-Z54dRbYzJYptjG2vxjfd_0X3b22brhZgiPnbY25o6OWu-FCfH-Jgm8XRgKuSf_6gVF_BVTpC16STdhySABXuCxJZtxqc/s200/LieToMe_037.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293780987869642306" /></a><br /><h3>Buffy’s Old Crush</h3><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ah, precious sunlight.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Jenny’s back! Giles is so nervous about their date. Hey Giles, where’s your gypsy sense of <em>adventure</em>?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You got to wonder what she’s thinking.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, I don’t wonder. Dang, double entendre much, Jenny? It’s like an all-the-time thing with her. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles is just <em>now </em>researching Spike? Glad you get could around to it<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe this is tax season, and he’s been busy with other things.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is tweed deductable for a librarian?<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRPtTWch8ltsbijdOXSWjNsR1MkWTbtYoD6g9cwfO9pyXxtFodqcGuvMyDL2YyvFRXxEGx1QaR4qxpsDYO1C465OwuLhc23UDv19jYHwoUm_A2h9B_UuIplZvGxKus13hw1zj7zfidxNU/s1600-h/LieToMe_047.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRPtTWch8ltsbijdOXSWjNsR1MkWTbtYoD6g9cwfO9pyXxtFodqcGuvMyDL2YyvFRXxEGx1QaR4qxpsDYO1C465OwuLhc23UDv19jYHwoUm_A2h9B_UuIplZvGxKus13hw1zj7zfidxNU/s200/LieToMe_047.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293781367878808610" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow and Buffy passing notes in class…so quaint!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do they still do that, sweetie?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, they just talk over you now and get irritated if you interrupt.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you enjoy Cordelia’s perspective on Marie Antoinette?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I enjoy Cordelia’s vision of history. I wonder what her take on the Medicis would have been.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I guarantee you she wouldn’t get all Miniver Cheevy about it, that’s for sure.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Damn, nice allusion!<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Billy Fordham…it’s great when Xander has to be jealous of humans.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander is jealous of everyone. He secretly loathes himself. Hence the shirts.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It was just mean of Joss to make Buffy reference the Divinyls’ “I Touch Myself.” There is no conceivable innocent meaning to it. Even Willow should have been able to figure that one out.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It was a bridge too far.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWWZa7FrA2dmVpk29ae6HVWe2Xovn6j2F3wBH63s1tdZfCkPwo6UZnMoS2rhPr6jV-mCNF0zhF9SfRqfjP7YRhnJGWmGfhMAoi_Nwc7qRLtKdgKo2HmpEiiJOQ6QVpUMlQZn4aEvpTmOA/s1600-h/LieToMe_065.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWWZa7FrA2dmVpk29ae6HVWe2Xovn6j2F3wBH63s1tdZfCkPwo6UZnMoS2rhPr6jV-mCNF0zhF9SfRqfjP7YRhnJGWmGfhMAoi_Nwc7qRLtKdgKo2HmpEiiJOQ6QVpUMlQZn4aEvpTmOA/s200/LieToMe_065.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293781763546148946" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander makes an interesting point here: <font color=yellow>“Geez, doesn’t she know any fat guys?”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She is chummy with the good-looking ones, apparently.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Except for Xander.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> At least he makes jokes. That’s his contribution.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Ford Knows</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNpkMzBaxypdVgRmWJbJRtyphbbsGoKP_vdGUJvl1kkIAXf4mxtrcOwMKHc-CJ89zGzcHxUA69uPN3ZofPIVwsTTi_oF5Tdi3-J4QSNk5Ms_SIMzPgs2K2Zc4RZ2ruEY043DwHK156x_E/s1600-h/LieToMe_086.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNpkMzBaxypdVgRmWJbJRtyphbbsGoKP_vdGUJvl1kkIAXf4mxtrcOwMKHc-CJ89zGzcHxUA69uPN3ZofPIVwsTTi_oF5Tdi3-J4QSNk5Ms_SIMzPgs2K2Zc4RZ2ruEY043DwHK156x_E/s200/LieToMe_086.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293782691264480994" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Angel’s caught in a lie. Staying in, reading. Buffy is trying to punish her man here.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least Angel’s hair looks much better in this episode.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They made him more pale than usual. Therefore the lipstick.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was going to mention that later. OMG the guy at the bar’s hat! Take it off! Take it off! You’re inside! And it’s <em>hideous!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I missed it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’re lucky. He looked like he was trying to channel Mr. McGoo or something.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“You’re not wrong.”</font color> Xander’s all-purpose quip. And effective.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s a little passive, but then again, it’s Xander. Made me laugh both times, though.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiW4iCETpwrNH-xoHMLUwgesRg26eTxMS5wbkuPnPOPgK2uH833PL40oYKAZ9qq8kP9qUvTodYAyx3MyhsX2iCqzFIoxVmgKRKNVVARz51LmZpcV2V_dAPookj1IKWZPswXkUQ5QF50VS0/s1600-h/LieToMe_107.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiW4iCETpwrNH-xoHMLUwgesRg26eTxMS5wbkuPnPOPgK2uH833PL40oYKAZ9qq8kP9qUvTodYAyx3MyhsX2iCqzFIoxVmgKRKNVVARz51LmZpcV2V_dAPookj1IKWZPswXkUQ5QF50VS0/s200/LieToMe_107.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293783129629967746" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Are those tiny monkees on Willow’s shirt?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought it was just a busy design.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A busy design flinging poo on my eyes.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What, Buffy smelled the vamp from around the corner? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She heard the crash. Did you not hear the crash, deafo?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wouldn’t be a very effective slayer. Especially since I’m a boy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And deaf.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Meanwhile…at the speakeasy, I mean the foundry. No, I mean a bomb shelter. The welder is a nice touch.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Great music in the club.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ-bp2YALnPc4V3ssyMwjgojZE-R5bdl1uP2UXpVR2XSCUniae7h0pQnfTqI5JWbf3qVXlCyfA_T_6CXApMg-vz2SNgrN4e9hjjFdAZvV18Mil9zF5K1OTaTN24Cnyyv3w5OozXvTXJrc/s1600-h/LieToMe_136.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ-bp2YALnPc4V3ssyMwjgojZE-R5bdl1uP2UXpVR2XSCUniae7h0pQnfTqI5JWbf3qVXlCyfA_T_6CXApMg-vz2SNgrN4e9hjjFdAZvV18Mil9zF5K1OTaTN24Cnyyv3w5OozXvTXJrc/s200/LieToMe_136.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293783740570671602" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> The goofy guy with the Lestat costume cracks me up. Marvin (Diego) looks like a magician.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He really does. I mean, purple?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Where in the world is Marvin Diego?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They keep showing “Dracula” on the TV. I get it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Good thing they weren’t showing “To Wong Fu…” That would have been awkward.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> More stylish, though.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Angel Needs Help</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYfA0DQmPxuUNWPfPS8XU1-4xNqUfSrsZkncoEETnDlYIvNH7g5uLO0yWq_Mgg8vZG0UxdAjSarHOsi1rITi-2GbLNxKLnBnEfbt_3Js4yey6tdQaYRp3b4Gl-YNmiC8W3BB30jj3KVTo/s1600-h/LieToMe_146.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYfA0DQmPxuUNWPfPS8XU1-4xNqUfSrsZkncoEETnDlYIvNH7g5uLO0yWq_Mgg8vZG0UxdAjSarHOsi1rITi-2GbLNxKLnBnEfbt_3Js4yey6tdQaYRp3b4Gl-YNmiC8W3BB30jj3KVTo/s200/LieToMe_146.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293784241027455202" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think it’s great Angel’s stalking the new guy. Jealousy is sexy in a boyfriend.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He claims there’s something not right about him. Yeah, the something “not-right” is he existing. Meanwhile, here’s Angel making a booty call on Willow.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s not actually a booty call, but a Google call.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ha ha! I like the freaked-out look on Willow’s face when she turns away after inviting Angel in.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She had to get her bra off the bed. I’m shocked you didn’t notice.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Actually,I did notice, but I’m refraining from commenting, because that would be crass. Willow is wearing that blood-red lipstick. But it's not as shocking as Angel’s.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He looks very pale in this episode, as I said before. <br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Touring Sunnydale</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNwIX7CNGbBNqUqGOHCcAuZQXuWsBniSSNsW0JXQ9W8I0D3yWqrmgw-DjWLp4WGPbMAWElbRl5EssPYg63ACUfa8aUj9tEnAPcHkJm71QOrKw1krHbK2FHwiqPlYKgxvp01EXqMXMHJ-k/s1600-h/LieToMe_202.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNwIX7CNGbBNqUqGOHCcAuZQXuWsBniSSNsW0JXQ9W8I0D3yWqrmgw-DjWLp4WGPbMAWElbRl5EssPYg63ACUfa8aUj9tEnAPcHkJm71QOrKw1krHbK2FHwiqPlYKgxvp01EXqMXMHJ-k/s200/LieToMe_202.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293784836888807634" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I can’t believe Buffy is taking Ford along to fight vampires.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t believe there’s a sidewalk two feet away, and they’re walking on the <em>grass</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What are you, the lawn police?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I also can’t believe that she buys Ford’s explanation about killing the vampire. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s an old friend. She wants to believe him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I have old friends too, but none of them can slay vampires.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>The Sunset Club</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzUE5vBaM3K0AE_RXbrJMJZAfGM9HX3704f0dT4MdJJUipy9JSyuG1MjswOoN5YZ9klnlnChI2VEJNsBdlkkZH5RD7L2D4GTN3plMI-st7N7BLdX3VHAzu4aGH4o1S8mAiw7r_fZev5w8/s1600-h/LieToMe_224.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzUE5vBaM3K0AE_RXbrJMJZAfGM9HX3704f0dT4MdJJUipy9JSyuG1MjswOoN5YZ9klnlnChI2VEJNsBdlkkZH5RD7L2D4GTN3plMI-st7N7BLdX3VHAzu4aGH4o1S8mAiw7r_fZev5w8/s200/LieToMe_224.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293786476695437266" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Angel actually does kind of fit in at this club.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Especially since he bought the same clothes at the vampire store as that other dude.<br />Here’s a thought: vampire Garanimals.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Don’t you mean, <em>Grrr</em>-animals? Lookit! This scene attacks all the stereotypes and preconceptions about vampires!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s kind of hoaky.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwb-gHC3P0GW2IRN5RmBVwJCrlhyphenhyphenUKdCWfYpHxGTOng-40yEwENVBxRVXVlm1xh2hl_BAXNdIorXinNtuum6afTuaPOINzFdN44vDhfIPlOIcLmVy_PaAvz93mS9g8DmzWewW0E5A2gsc/s1600-h/LieToMe_235.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwb-gHC3P0GW2IRN5RmBVwJCrlhyphenhyphenUKdCWfYpHxGTOng-40yEwENVBxRVXVlm1xh2hl_BAXNdIorXinNtuum6afTuaPOINzFdN44vDhfIPlOIcLmVy_PaAvz93mS9g8DmzWewW0E5A2gsc/s200/LieToMe_235.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293785902628105522" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> These are the vampires that the teenagers are wanting to emulate? Not <em>The Lost Boys?</em> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re teenagers! Don’t you want to be cool and undead?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Chanterelle at least is trying. She got poured into that dress.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And apparently vampires wear a lot of make-up.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Angel can tell you that. There were a number of nifty one-liners in this scene. Xander had a couple: <font color=yellow>“Sure thing, Bossy the Cow.”</font color> And when tells Angel: <font color=yellow>“You really are a people person”</font color> after he crushes Chanterelle.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2SXj92yp6dChB7ruVCtUkW82YjtBhyMUMi6xz9M_BlYNoS8bnbblY_BZGfSuySedg-zOvKngwzHYVZER8s1a8EuKxNpzdEDhwshUlAS8ect8DU8c7aWlzb7p5RU27lKRgNtZ63NVepNs/s1600-h/LieToMe_218.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2SXj92yp6dChB7ruVCtUkW82YjtBhyMUMi6xz9M_BlYNoS8bnbblY_BZGfSuySedg-zOvKngwzHYVZER8s1a8EuKxNpzdEDhwshUlAS8ect8DU8c7aWlzb7p5RU27lKRgNtZ63NVepNs/s200/LieToMe_218.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293786832633943090" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And Chanterelle’s all boo-hoo: <font color=yellow>“Other viewpoints than yours may be valid, you know.”</font color> <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s an idiot, but she still has feelings, Angel. You notice how Xander’s big mouth makes trouble on the way out?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Because they get noticed by the one dude.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why do they have him around?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He drives the plot wagon…over the cliff.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>About Drusilla</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXYnuw7yo5aOwWz_Pqd88YrRzRJgw0yx08d524_JQmVKDaMsuY_xWb65dG_1cNpHg_uD104VR0g1RNM6APNoUy0haifPcrjKqXi-DHOLUzTlxApJno6YJb_BKGKqzUFnJEWLO55QPdhek/s1600-h/LieToMe_241.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXYnuw7yo5aOwWz_Pqd88YrRzRJgw0yx08d524_JQmVKDaMsuY_xWb65dG_1cNpHg_uD104VR0g1RNM6APNoUy0haifPcrjKqXi-DHOLUzTlxApJno6YJb_BKGKqzUFnJEWLO55QPdhek/s200/LieToMe_241.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293787891858277666" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles faked interest in monster trucks to be with Jenny. I would never do that. That’s <em>dishonest</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, I know. You like techno.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That old saw. I like Jenny’s jacket. It’s cool.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Drusilla killed by an angry mob in Prague. Not true, of course.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMgFy0N1x7_9yRO57Zo2siFsvw5sojuVBwzjbhsXiFwdP4U0X5pVMRsb_wjf5xkmxyoB9LevDMorBeOJX5LYgIeDRm3Lz_-3_RCf7PURApuSO2ivTe0TXn9Bpn7WnjNBUg70ODL1EzX3A/s1600-h/LieToMe_253.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMgFy0N1x7_9yRO57Zo2siFsvw5sojuVBwzjbhsXiFwdP4U0X5pVMRsb_wjf5xkmxyoB9LevDMorBeOJX5LYgIeDRm3Lz_-3_RCf7PURApuSO2ivTe0TXn9Bpn7WnjNBUg70ODL1EzX3A/s200/LieToMe_253.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293787465677379122" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Where does Giles get his information? And someone tell that vampire that you have to check those out! You just can’t take the book and <em>leave!</em> A buzzer should have sounded, or something.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> If I were Giles, I would have tackled the vampire and taken it back.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’re hardcore. That’s why I love you.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Ford and Spike </h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3phBrwpLB62uUAB7trjdaPFIQ2koSaVMbJrD3nM3KGWHV8oTlhKwziJYkXf-Q7HS70nWN3WoKgq7bmSPc5QGg-o4EeXQs-jTpapMlJeDtsa4hYJuWCNeDDmJ7QIMOFwiQlrBYVxvjJCg/s1600-h/LieToMe_266.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3phBrwpLB62uUAB7trjdaPFIQ2koSaVMbJrD3nM3KGWHV8oTlhKwziJYkXf-Q7HS70nWN3WoKgq7bmSPc5QGg-o4EeXQs-jTpapMlJeDtsa4hYJuWCNeDDmJ7QIMOFwiQlrBYVxvjJCg/s200/LieToMe_266.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293788284431295250" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You ever notice how the minions are always vamped out?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s like they’re too young and stupid to know better. They need someone to stand next to them and say, “<em>Dude</em>, you’re still vamped out.” Sort of like when someone says “Psst! XYZ!”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe it’s a hormone thing. Like a teenage boy being excited all the time.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If I were a vampire, I’d only vamp out for special occasions. Not because I was bored and there wasn’t anyone in the house.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Spike’s voice starts shaking when he talks about Angel too long. He doesn’t like him much. They must have a history.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I detected that as well. He loves her, even when she makes him really, really, really mad.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“The bird’s dead, Dru. You left it in a cage and you didn’t feed it and now it’s dead, just like the last one.”</font color> That’s harsh. On the other hand, Spike must get tired of visiting pet shops at night.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE94OZSbnBy31jbqwsAzOu0_NZc6u8ghqq7PIvfa3cgcdcfyLdXDaNhYU8ry_Ld728ygIIWXY1pQSqacnozty3oz2N7t0dSRicj2M4XvSdrukfTPie9jK-W0bO3ByoodLSTR3XPanYssQ/s1600-h/LieToMe_285.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgE94OZSbnBy31jbqwsAzOu0_NZc6u8ghqq7PIvfa3cgcdcfyLdXDaNhYU8ry_Ld728ygIIWXY1pQSqacnozty3oz2N7t0dSRicj2M4XvSdrukfTPie9jK-W0bO3ByoodLSTR3XPanYssQ/s200/LieToMe_285.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293788985172845714" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I spy with my little eye: a douchebag! And his name is <em>Ford!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think Ford is pushy. I don’t like the way he takes over the scene and makes Spike say that stupid 30 seconds line.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“I’ve known you for two minutes and I can’t stand you. I don’t feature you livin’ forever. Can I eat him now?”</font color> Why even ask, Spike? Just do it. We’ll all understand.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’d make for a short episode, but we’d applaud.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’d be an interesting twist, and the advertisers certainly would go for it. I just couldn’t get a fix on him. When he was with Buffy initially, he seemed cool. Now he seems like a total dweeb. Later on he seems dark and brooding. My head’s spinning, Joss!<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Angel and Buffy</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnTgyEVXk63fwcntTqBgL9M9QP6DtYS5r478g5RBDITkROYlej4p7dV04vlbFg9l5edKnW5ouviqshELRLZFysNSeWvre9aT8OjWXZUOQZ_P_khmghe2LxSk4W1mLp9WOT7mVxo38ad-w/s1600-h/LieToMe_293.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnTgyEVXk63fwcntTqBgL9M9QP6DtYS5r478g5RBDITkROYlej4p7dV04vlbFg9l5edKnW5ouviqshELRLZFysNSeWvre9aT8OjWXZUOQZ_P_khmghe2LxSk4W1mLp9WOT7mVxo38ad-w/s200/LieToMe_293.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293789593947131154" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Angel is so polite, asking to come in.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Of course, he’s coming in through the back door. Was he out in the yard, spying on her again?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He probably saw the light on in the kitchen, and went around back.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But they’ve got that fence in the back. He would have had to jump over it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I really don’t remember the geography of their backyard. To be continued.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNkEG59meKbhFUQhOtSIdH77fI-ruzAjkrSYISdIq6b18rVDzbGJb2YLk1oRjiktiGp9kLcIYOC8VwSUwqheczhyphenhyphenZ4cgt4tfoS1CBvFc3Mjq9nWNg0pWF3_JD7zxSL7aVHynm_gGrJG8o/s1600-h/LieToMe_298.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNkEG59meKbhFUQhOtSIdH77fI-ruzAjkrSYISdIq6b18rVDzbGJb2YLk1oRjiktiGp9kLcIYOC8VwSUwqheczhyphenhyphenZ4cgt4tfoS1CBvFc3Mjq9nWNg0pWF3_JD7zxSL7aVHynm_gGrJG8o/s200/LieToMe_298.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293789782073798210" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is it just me, or this is a tiresome exchange between Angel and Buffy? I got a little bored.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, you would. They’re having a long, painful talk about their relationship, and you pull a guy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Angel loves to visit mental torture. Buffy really shouldn’t complain about anything he does, then. ‘Cause it could be worse! “I’m sorry I forgot your birthday. On the other hand, hey! at least I didn’t eviscerate your family, like I did that other girl’s!”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So he should get credit for the bad things he doesn’t do? That’s messed up.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Buffy Steps In</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtWOe4QAm7ifXyOZY2574sfJ71jnRuBPZyHU2xYEaR2-YfhpyjMN0bTckGGyS_k92tC9XgZs6UBciz0nEWRVfc9haprBNc81eUQN6vNd5yoGOP_b_G1b_W8XJHzaCTK0Lv_9zfK42Lgqs/s1600-h/LieToMe_325.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtWOe4QAm7ifXyOZY2574sfJ71jnRuBPZyHU2xYEaR2-YfhpyjMN0bTckGGyS_k92tC9XgZs6UBciz0nEWRVfc9haprBNc81eUQN6vNd5yoGOP_b_G1b_W8XJHzaCTK0Lv_9zfK42Lgqs/s200/LieToMe_325.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293790330916232194" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Easiest date-asking ever.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ford has the Riley haircut. Did you notice?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No. A proto-Riley, maybe. He actually reminds me of Parker.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Another douchebag. Look! they’re having a teacher appreciation night! I’d be like, “Shit! Do I have to go?”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, you would say that.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Show me some appreciation by leaving me alone.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander and Willow are dressed like normal people! How often does that happen?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Never. Especially in the same scene.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Everybody lies, says Ford. Sounds familiar.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not an original concept. House says that.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t believe that with a body like that, Chanterelle feels the need to become one of the lonely ones.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ZV_O9w7CmoeOglM0A1ojaKsxM-Fg4Fl0GtAagnA6SthcEx0v8cuYMMijVjypubkMoR3VdsYM3Pke64fWDyaUtZBFlyzmZVnOYIokq7lMJ57HvXqzsKJX0GvkzHK2JbSp3B7N-7v3dC4/s1600-h/LieToMe_338.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7ZV_O9w7CmoeOglM0A1ojaKsxM-Fg4Fl0GtAagnA6SthcEx0v8cuYMMijVjypubkMoR3VdsYM3Pke64fWDyaUtZBFlyzmZVnOYIokq7lMJ57HvXqzsKJX0GvkzHK2JbSp3B7N-7v3dC4/s200/LieToMe_338.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293790869781183138" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It might be the make-up. She wears too much make-up.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Does she actually think that vampires want that crap all over their fangs?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Lipstick really isn’t tasty.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I heard on CSI that they used to make it with spermicetti. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Let’s not go there, shall we?<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Sunset</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglGWp9AZ6mm2FhxhSaPic3O6GMf7zI5XNXKnGpSQB-SddvttpIonObNTQCdL4Jnzws68BjPAUx3pfszs0lOdi-Krqw-Vv6eFwoMI_FfVAhpKTEFWclhwX35RSYeGQHEaIugzs2UtT4kw8/s1600-h/LieToMe_351.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglGWp9AZ6mm2FhxhSaPic3O6GMf7zI5XNXKnGpSQB-SddvttpIonObNTQCdL4Jnzws68BjPAUx3pfszs0lOdi-Krqw-Vv6eFwoMI_FfVAhpKTEFWclhwX35RSYeGQHEaIugzs2UtT4kw8/s200/LieToMe_351.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293791310941754802" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy: <font color=yellow>“Spike and his friends pigging out at the all you can eat moron bar.”</font color> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This one had many great lines in it. I liked that one a lot. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> As outraged as he is, Buffy cannot get over Marvin’s outfit. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s disconcerting. She has to stop mid-rant. <font color=yellow>“Could you be wearing a dorkier outfit?”</font color><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“…a demon sets up shop in your old house,”</font color> Oh, and by the way, vampires are big liars. She left out that part.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was kind of amazed Angel didn’t tell them that before. Like they’ve got a sense of the social contract.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not followers of Rousseau. More like Hobbes or Machiavelli. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> "Nasty, brutish, and short."<br /><font color=red>HE: </font color> Nice <em>Leviathan</em> reference.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8MZX_F2dxtQn2ewF7zUChOIBoyI2yZFCuvjQvbNfX4jq1iZEsuOqZSy8RnMm99zkbTvQC7pkasy206Gy4SWBrYyf3k3wOh7lAqOVihvW6B2YFcUzjCxuesK5QOO2Qc1dgSZvtEPmwf6I/s1600-h/LieToMe_362.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8MZX_F2dxtQn2ewF7zUChOIBoyI2yZFCuvjQvbNfX4jq1iZEsuOqZSy8RnMm99zkbTvQC7pkasy206Gy4SWBrYyf3k3wOh7lAqOVihvW6B2YFcUzjCxuesK5QOO2Qc1dgSZvtEPmwf6I/s200/LieToMe_362.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293791789516754162" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This brain cancer thing is a nifty twist on the bad guy cliché…Joss is just as good at the little shockers as he is the big ones.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t feel sorry for him. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You don’t feel sorry for a guy with <em>terminal brain cancer?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not in this respect, no.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hmm. I like how Buffy gets her existentialist on…we do have choices!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She doesn’t back down, either. She’s saddened, but she doesn’t compromise her position.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXGIB1rSj-MU2sYXhxTMg2-dsMT5PL5Gco4vszyrObYXflxiZhHuoxsQOqxp1R1S9xD2dh8DEd386b-kbkNGEJli70wiCBA-hSZ3jRESIwWh1fsksxelwUtaacftXDrIBKoC9FS61UdhQ/s1600-h/george+clinton+adult+diaper.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 176px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXGIB1rSj-MU2sYXhxTMg2-dsMT5PL5Gco4vszyrObYXflxiZhHuoxsQOqxp1R1S9xD2dh8DEd386b-kbkNGEJli70wiCBA-hSZ3jRESIwWh1fsksxelwUtaacftXDrIBKoC9FS61UdhQ/s200/george+clinton+adult+diaper.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293792281474067010" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A car screeching? Must be Spike!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He makes an effort to be timely, and that should be commended.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy: <font color=yellow>“This is not the mother ship!”</font color> No doubt, Buffy! Flashlight! Neon light! Spotlight!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Free your mind and your ass will follow?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A-to-mic dog! Bow wow <em>wow</em>, yippee-yo, yippee-yay!<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Take Them All! </h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgO4USQnCMa_K7Li5n3c6eZBDxOX7QG5cDBnebigeCI-yYVeMyjpLDRF7WaDOC3J9T58_s3ydnkCO0F4rTqNcxdADS6ISfMUNQQwzc_prNoLk4hzWkEIP7Bts5oprfGC_gXSkVGo06uAQ/s1600-h/LieToMe_365.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgO4USQnCMa_K7Li5n3c6eZBDxOX7QG5cDBnebigeCI-yYVeMyjpLDRF7WaDOC3J9T58_s3ydnkCO0F4rTqNcxdADS6ISfMUNQQwzc_prNoLk4hzWkEIP7Bts5oprfGC_gXSkVGo06uAQ/s200/LieToMe_365.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293792718517703426" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Spike is very leaderly here.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hard not to be with that idiot crew of his. Buffy’s like, where do I start?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But she was cunning. She knew enough to go after Drusilla.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Crappy wire work, guys! That leap looked bad, I’m afraid to say.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She didn’t quite make it to the top.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe995ltbCcOtvzArDBBhiDO8y1c103AbAv9JS80kTUCcH7lOmQSvJyMCRzeHI71yMgeqojZ05mldVvicEZP-ydrUW2UgBQW59I2q3RxJwkT9USaKmfaGemmZc7OpM0zkIgLTfpCaRyQZw/s1600-h/LieToMe_406.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe995ltbCcOtvzArDBBhiDO8y1c103AbAv9JS80kTUCcH7lOmQSvJyMCRzeHI71yMgeqojZ05mldVvicEZP-ydrUW2UgBQW59I2q3RxJwkT9USaKmfaGemmZc7OpM0zkIgLTfpCaRyQZw/s200/LieToMe_406.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293793243645849026" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least you couldn’t see the wires. I understand that they were on a schedule and didn’t have a lot of time for retakes, but they should have made time for that one. I liked the ashtray line, though.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Drusilla doesn’t put up much of a fight here, being weak and all.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why did Spike bring her along, anyway? That was just dumb.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> [imitating Drusilla’s accent] She wanted a treat.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix4IoJSgyAu7CaJ_BrO8JfBhTh92SsodyNtuMa_FunzZzPQ-HT9zKW_5D9NRqWziDyE_WojelAo_V3-tZza4-eGNltqkWiB5hFgpzXPm5EE5G2APFQtLkxodSaExpxOqb0sZCrIWlUMV4/s1600-h/LieToMe_415.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix4IoJSgyAu7CaJ_BrO8JfBhTh92SsodyNtuMa_FunzZzPQ-HT9zKW_5D9NRqWziDyE_WojelAo_V3-tZza4-eGNltqkWiB5hFgpzXPm5EE5G2APFQtLkxodSaExpxOqb0sZCrIWlUMV4/s200/LieToMe_415.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293793769739603058" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love how she turns one-syllable words into two. Or possibly three. This is technically not a Spike-Buffy fight, I think. They didn’t actually engage each other.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Don’t put it on there. There wasn’t even a face-off. Blows were not exchanged, sweetie. Although she did win her fight with Ford.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, whatever. Douchebags don’t get a sidebar widget.<br /><br /><hr/><br /><br /><h3>Lie To Me</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWWADgGoE6YZRTyw9O3JKb16kNpYgl9rufmhSGv2q2G6DZer0NlZjJbtYtAEPFzT1kn9ZoJkSbmdSCXCpnu0-8zKsMCa7etZd3kL6yyxNUmSq0G6muMJTFGBcsC2_ye7js2yTnSvq7YJs/s1600-h/LieToMe_435.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWWADgGoE6YZRTyw9O3JKb16kNpYgl9rufmhSGv2q2G6DZer0NlZjJbtYtAEPFzT1kn9ZoJkSbmdSCXCpnu0-8zKsMCa7etZd3kL6yyxNUmSq0G6muMJTFGBcsC2_ye7js2yTnSvq7YJs/s200/LieToMe_435.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293794558921080498" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There’s no reward for Ford.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So they buried Ford in Sunnydale. Convenient for Buffy. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She leaves flowers and sticks around to stake him. That’s a first.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I still can’t believe that I didn’t recognize that vampire as Ford. So that means that Spike kept his word to him. I think that’s why I didn’t put it together. I would have just assumed that they wouldn’t have turned him.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you see them walk away from Ford’s grave, honey?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No. I just can’t get over Spike keeping his word to somebody that annoyed him so much. I guess they got bored in the bomb shelter.<br />Maybe he thought it would really bother Buffy if her friend came back as a vampire.<br />Then it never should have happened at the end of the episode. Because Buffy would have needed time to react emotionally to the turning. I don’t think it’s a strong ending.<br />I’d just like to point out in Spike’s defense that he often keeps his word. You just don’t like Ford. In your world, you shouldn’t have to keep your word to a douchebag.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA1l_rw3awPbmI1BmlVrjpCaAUO4w_bsOyACBDWE03CUr9Zumi5GBRUYeGhpcnRivGBCpf13uzvVIvIVHkHRFEppPwj7uYBMUH0HRHqfbh1j35DGLyyzTsJ37e9zjd2Yltb6OHPtob10I/s1600-h/LieToMe_433.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA1l_rw3awPbmI1BmlVrjpCaAUO4w_bsOyACBDWE03CUr9Zumi5GBRUYeGhpcnRivGBCpf13uzvVIvIVHkHRFEppPwj7uYBMUH0HRHqfbh1j35DGLyyzTsJ37e9zjd2Yltb6OHPtob10I/s200/LieToMe_433.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5293794351984086898" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Whoa! Where did that come from? I just thought when she went back to Club Dead and saw Ford’s body, that was it. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She was just fine with standing there outside his grave, waiting to stake him. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Let him turn first, and then kill him? That’s kind of a moral cop-out. This episode ends on a very disturbing note.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This is Joss Whedon. Sometimes quirky things happen, and over the next few episodes, they start to make sense.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Nothing’s ever simple anymore,”</font color> Buffy says. And she’s saying this in Season 2. OMG.<br /><br /><font color=yellow>Giles: Yes, it’s terribly simple. The good guys are always stalwart and true. The bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats. And we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies and everybody lives happily ever after.<br />Buffy: Liar.</font color><br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/msNgZ2nexC0&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/msNgZ2nexC0&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Next Time: <font color=yellow><a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/search/label/The%20Dark%20Age">The Dark Age.</a></font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-16846315087490116572009-01-02T15:42:00.000-08:002009-01-02T18:57:35.950-08:00Halloween<h3>Season Two, Episode Six</h3><br />12/31/08<br /><br /><h3>A Pumpkin Patch</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRkfIkOtOYHznPPd8LpUki5EF0vALZUejYy2ay7K2BG6q4e0t_dJCRPGZxWZvUYJIgCxj_Prs3e2RMjuzHJ4-EX7rSEURWJCLlblYYiqLWJsnDTXfImbR1389Nkaugs4vnTspUW3MiiAY/s1600-h/h1.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRkfIkOtOYHznPPd8LpUki5EF0vALZUejYy2ay7K2BG6q4e0t_dJCRPGZxWZvUYJIgCxj_Prs3e2RMjuzHJ4-EX7rSEURWJCLlblYYiqLWJsnDTXfImbR1389Nkaugs4vnTspUW3MiiAY/s200/h1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286851871215539554" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This was a very short introduction…no dialogue even!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No pumpkins were hurt in the making of this Buffy episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not true. The vampire lands on one.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It was CGI. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s not how they roll in Pop’s Pumpkin Patch. This scene addresses another ongoing Buffy issue, though: How is it that vampires show up on film, but not in mirrors?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There are no mirrors in video cameras.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There are reflective surfaces. Just say you don’t know.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Date</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjECwFt2og26d-xYBmcOd3NCPY7zs4NFC_XDS-O2X5Uc8aE7zxUu1deXYRAV5kv0QuQAAai-vuZCOZv-2o8F7L4UeOGMJ7wDRvBt2V1S_uRWwDWe2mTxj-UrPg2OOAX1-SmKclGdx5Y5uM/s1600-h/h2.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjECwFt2og26d-xYBmcOd3NCPY7zs4NFC_XDS-O2X5Uc8aE7zxUu1deXYRAV5kv0QuQAAai-vuZCOZv-2o8F7L4UeOGMJ7wDRvBt2V1S_uRWwDWe2mTxj-UrPg2OOAX1-SmKclGdx5Y5uM/s200/h2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286852774196989874" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Listen to the new band! That’s all you’re going to get.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I wish <em>this </em>town had a Bronze. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, it doesn’t. What’s this? Angel is actually laughing at Cordy’s jokes!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I can’t believe Angel is laughing. When does he ever do that? We should count it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Meanwhile, Buffy says she wants to be one of those <font color=yellow>“girls who have time to think about nail polish and facials” </font color>…man, times have changed in 10 years. You can’t say that word now.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why not?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Because the meaning of <em>facial </em>has changed.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m going to ignore that remark. Wait, no I’m not. How are we going to speak when every word has a pornographic double meaning? You say “Good morning,” and you have titters because it now means something else.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Heh heh. You said <em>“titters.”</em><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Volunteers</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh93x8HwIlHg7w7t_M8V0UIFszd8BvRJTh4kpBIZFk7Y1_tjK4S2kNAd40T31bed5mzeeH-35k7nQmyCJwBVU86szVflgj0QoGhVbeB0-aWUg4rbJTPrT3EtT-ipJpBYA03aOgOsZ1O6aw/s1600-h/h3.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh93x8HwIlHg7w7t_M8V0UIFszd8BvRJTh4kpBIZFk7Y1_tjK4S2kNAd40T31bed5mzeeH-35k7nQmyCJwBVU86szVflgj0QoGhVbeB0-aWUg4rbJTPrT3EtT-ipJpBYA03aOgOsZ1O6aw/s200/h3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286854026487436146" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Sugar-hyped little runts” </font color>? Sounds like parenthood.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> For all his faults, Snyder does a lot of reaching out to the community, what with his pool of slave labor and all.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Reminds me of something else. Which episode was it when they were chanting “fresh fish” at the freshmen coming to school?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And one of the kids burrowed to freedom from his locker using only a rock ax?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Time and pressure.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP17MCPBQ0pICWfQLb7HlaWq2x40UQ-xdGKg9QKhWD0aeX4S9nlgzkzcOodAN7-00KemzL1LH4ZcT3MCKi63jGmfPezPYLiNRNrCnKCLp87MklcSZpCG0sCyD-I90YK6OvbWgiHwwKH2Y/s1600-h/entrain+thingie.gif"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 192px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP17MCPBQ0pICWfQLb7HlaWq2x40UQ-xdGKg9QKhWD0aeX4S9nlgzkzcOodAN7-00KemzL1LH4ZcT3MCKi63jGmfPezPYLiNRNrCnKCLp87MklcSZpCG0sCyD-I90YK6OvbWgiHwwKH2Y/s200/entrain+thingie.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286854421688591698" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> The ENTRAIN sticker will block it from the warden, I mean principal. What is ENTRAIN, anyway? I thought it was going to be the name of a band appearing.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Of course you did. Because you stopped the disc to stare at it for ten minutes. Joss Whedon needs to put little arrows on the stuff that’s actually important. Oh wait. <em> He put actors in the show.</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> ENTRAIN rhymes with Ethan Rayne. Coincidence?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Halloween is <font color=yellow> “dead for the undead.” </font color> Take a note there. That’s important.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I would love to put on a fantabulous gown and go to a ball. That’s important.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey, we can go to the Bronze that’s magically coming to town.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Very droll, as Giles would say. Xander actually gets upset with Buffy here.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> His manhood was…well, decimated, really. What there was of it, anyway.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It didn’t take long.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So get this. Xander wants Dr. Pepper. Doesn’t get it. Wants to beat Larry. Not going to happen. Buffy takes care of Larry, and then gets a DIET Dr. Pepper. Is there a hidden meaning there?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s the karmic answer to Xander’s problem. The girls he hangs out with are stronger than he is, so he might as well be drinking the diet, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They all are. Without exception. Anya, Ampata, Preying Mantis Lady, Buffy, Willow…they all are.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW-iTHD43SIKr8E6nNftPokZlBGl2ScrWU2eM_1otlvo5IyTPzKfZNdZheIxBWTiWy3eiJE4G_-ZFXzHHPBsDQTi08pysQBoAs8C3vX8X-mkZRrtLBHyxTDQNTCYEHpXxNKD3B-IqsZCA/s1600-h/h4.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW-iTHD43SIKr8E6nNftPokZlBGl2ScrWU2eM_1otlvo5IyTPzKfZNdZheIxBWTiWy3eiJE4G_-ZFXzHHPBsDQTi08pysQBoAs8C3vX8X-mkZRrtLBHyxTDQNTCYEHpXxNKD3B-IqsZCA/s200/h4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286855557844360114" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Someone should tell Willow that she can take off her backpack when she sits down.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like Buffy’s plaid pants.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia is looking good, as usual…very preppy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordelia the slayer?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“…But when it comes to dating, <em>I’m</em> the slayer.”</font color> You know, when it comes to grammar, <em>I’m</em> the slayer.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When it comes to knitting, <em>I’m</em> the slayer.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/JgqB71eKGvc&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/JgqB71eKGvc&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Costume Shop</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Halloween is a time for being <font color=yellow>“sexy and wild with no repercussions.” </font color>…I thought that was what roofies were for.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What? That’s horrible! I’m going to slip you a roofie.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s horrible is the message Buffy takes out of Halloween.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUBtJv7H6zNqqlHji68xcrRWYYadoqSpPL1A-OzS_YiWKFQ_q5bnVYHQqC4HvrX1lFFvLf3aA4K0iSenzkUJc5a9eF9YUZXjjbM_PuVLgPVsdeeUBNDUfqkQE4lA4fv-n-oTnTM8oU8F8/s1600-h/h5.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUBtJv7H6zNqqlHji68xcrRWYYadoqSpPL1A-OzS_YiWKFQ_q5bnVYHQqC4HvrX1lFFvLf3aA4K0iSenzkUJc5a9eF9YUZXjjbM_PuVLgPVsdeeUBNDUfqkQE4lA4fv-n-oTnTM8oU8F8/s200/h5.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286858591376895650" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s interesting that Xander represses by dressing up as a military guy. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought he was just going for cheap.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Absolutely. It’s like he’s subconsciously trying to refight his battle with Larry by becoming a military man.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why the <em>long face</em>, Ethan? Oh ho ho ho.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Huh?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He’s got a really long face.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cute. I thought the dress was lovely. Did you like the dress?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not into that style. Nor am I into Ethan with the silk shirt.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ethan is caught in the Eighties. That’s part of his evil.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Someone New</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglcT6EUp6BGGkOQVQLzFEZo8-nGlOTP0vW0Oif9wcpMkD0JX9NimS-YqHw4oWB5eRWND4gddU7Pcdxt9lgYjClBWR_KUQGauCT55KCCkO-eDWShrAbTo5Qq2n4hnyISlJvc8MF08-24vo/s1600-h/h6.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglcT6EUp6BGGkOQVQLzFEZo8-nGlOTP0vW0Oif9wcpMkD0JX9NimS-YqHw4oWB5eRWND4gddU7Pcdxt9lgYjClBWR_KUQGauCT55KCCkO-eDWShrAbTo5Qq2n4hnyISlJvc8MF08-24vo/s200/h6.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286859242332519874" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nice to see mounted TVs in vampire lairs.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Spike susses out his competition here. He’s the resourceful one.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Very scholarly. You have to respect that.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And he delegates well. He didn’t need to go out to the cemetery to get that footage. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Spike’s Management Secrets</em>, available in fine bookstores everywhere. And Amazon.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Here’s newbie Ethan with the Janus statue. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Chaos, I remain, as ever, thy faithful, degenerate son.” </font color><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDF4-WUj4hO64QZ0uFrR6He2PLbYh85BCq9-DjHVJutSov3_-h_euBdXq71zbHzGiBz4sn-5HO9pkhs8pYCcp5vhk-vz0ToRGF-zAsrR0YmYtqm3BG1yOeHBidxGB7NY935z7S3KSVwpA/s1600-h/h7.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDF4-WUj4hO64QZ0uFrR6He2PLbYh85BCq9-DjHVJutSov3_-h_euBdXq71zbHzGiBz4sn-5HO9pkhs8pYCcp5vhk-vz0ToRGF-zAsrR0YmYtqm3BG1yOeHBidxGB7NY935z7S3KSVwpA/s200/h7.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286860245828068690" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’ve tasted Chaos. It was bitter with an oaky flavor. Goes well with fruit.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That was a cool tilt and pan from the female to the male side of the statue.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I missed it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sigh.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Halloween</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoRSLPHXyaZtXKgc5PmTFmVB-yTZe7afaBOUHOmXfGR82ihh9vZVIlnaRQrIAVHc3JnSglR2CLOfZMHlEG073YQO3TqxjZKerzkRI8zgd6ST53vyf-pga2cQ94Nd1BaqaVDzSD87M5Ie4/s1600-h/h8.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoRSLPHXyaZtXKgc5PmTFmVB-yTZe7afaBOUHOmXfGR82ihh9vZVIlnaRQrIAVHc3JnSglR2CLOfZMHlEG073YQO3TqxjZKerzkRI8zgd6ST53vyf-pga2cQ94Nd1BaqaVDzSD87M5Ie4/s200/h8.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286860892426972610" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Can you imagine if Willow had decided to go with the slut costume instead? <em>Watch out, Sunnydale!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But the slut costume didn’t come from Ethan’s shop.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Was it one of Buffy’s outfits? Is Buffy the slut?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjACd-xHbgZAuqH2sBl10q4ho9ZRNmL2l0S-8Fvx_-duMOHo7eofeLaHHEv9GSqJyz0hll0Twm5yibIIInYJgkN3LFz-FFgRIQJnWT7e6lk-ZPy3XzpfrSGxdNgyfE4JgiMCEi7RVNjWxM/s1600-h/h9.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjACd-xHbgZAuqH2sBl10q4ho9ZRNmL2l0S-8Fvx_-duMOHo7eofeLaHHEv9GSqJyz0hll0Twm5yibIIInYJgkN3LFz-FFgRIQJnWT7e6lk-ZPy3XzpfrSGxdNgyfE4JgiMCEi7RVNjWxM/s200/h9.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286861716200738738" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander shouldn’t be staring at Willow’s Boo. That’s ill-mannered.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Eyes up here, buddy. I wouldn’t let high schoolers take kids to go trick or treating. My husband leaving it for me to do is so much better.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Trust me, you wouldn’t want me doing it, either. Unless your idea of Halloween fun is for me to go to CVS and have the kids wait in the car. Say, what is that costume supposed to be…a crab? A lobster, maybe?<br /> <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oz has an ‘entrain’ sticker in his locker. Just like Willow has on hers?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That becomes very important later in the episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Does it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>No.</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like Oz’s one-liners. Especially when he’s laconic: <font color=yellow>“Jeez, you’re like a great big cat.” </font color> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The fun part is that Cordelia takes his comment at face value and starts to explain it.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh8oDMCT-LJz8zVmu7qQwdKt8xCwGodcixZdGssuGq_-CQnUgd-nkiVJtCUV1gG3202AIBhd471ZpOfuW8rYskjc15d9ZHksz29SvB1_Vl2ri50YgsAolhHpad9yEFDqOlTQYa7LhgMqg/s1600-h/h10.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh8oDMCT-LJz8zVmu7qQwdKt8xCwGodcixZdGssuGq_-CQnUgd-nkiVJtCUV1gG3202AIBhd471ZpOfuW8rYskjc15d9ZHksz29SvB1_Vl2ri50YgsAolhHpad9yEFDqOlTQYa7LhgMqg/s200/h10.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286862622875750994" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Why can’t I meet a nice girl like that?” </font color> says Oz. Then misses Willow again for the bajillionth time.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Showtime</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwsJ9Ne1N0KDNTRiDLKrGk-1hZPvNpSAeQXpgDCiwzOd3LUVNPE3MUn2H9ai3T7M9h0HJ9NGXMMSQ2O8THpRy29wCNhl17CPad-FL4xHPM3EWqnsvEYHq4ycBUPVBIYyIiQoQ-WoXP8dI/s1600-h/h11.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwsJ9Ne1N0KDNTRiDLKrGk-1hZPvNpSAeQXpgDCiwzOd3LUVNPE3MUn2H9ai3T7M9h0HJ9NGXMMSQ2O8THpRy29wCNhl17CPad-FL4xHPM3EWqnsvEYHq4ycBUPVBIYyIiQoQ-WoXP8dI/s200/h11.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286864462351465202" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You know what occurred to me as we were watching him do this incantation in Latin? I should learn Latin and curse all my enemies.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Latin is the official language of spooky monsters.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You should start counting the times they use Latin. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It may not be as much as one might think, because I seem to remember a bunch of older languages and crypto-languages being mentioned. Latin’s relatively new.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s not as old as Ancient Sumerian.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least Ethan is using classical Latin pronunciation, and not ecclesiastical. This way we know he has incantation cred.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It really burns my faggot when they do that. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Um…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was looking for something Roman-y to say.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you notice the overhead candled circle shot during the incantation? That’s a Whedon favorite.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You wouldn't happen to know the Latin, would you?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I'm so glad you asked! <font color=orange>[Scroll down...making tables is hard.]</font color><br /><table><br /><tr><br /><td><em>Janus, evoco vester animum.</em></td><br /><td>Janus, I summon your spirit.</td><br /></tr><br /><tr><br /><td><em>Exaudi meam causam</em></td><br /><td>Hear my cause.</td><br /></tr><br /><tr><br /><td><em>Carpe noctem pro consilium vestrem</em></td><br /><td>Take this night for your plans.</td><br /></tr><br /><tr><br /><td><em>Vene, appare...</em></td><br /><td>Come, appear...</td><br /></tr><br /><td><em>...et nobis monstra quod est infinita potestas</em></td><br /><td>...and show us infinite power.</td><br /></tr><br /><tr><br /><td><em>Persona intra...</em></td><br /><td>The characters (masks) within...</td><br /></tr><br /><tr><br /><td><em>...corpem et sanguem commutandum est.</em></td><br /><td>...are transformed into body and blood.</td><br /></tr><br /><tr><br /><td><em>Vestra sancta praesentia conscrecit visceram!</em></td><br /><td>Your holy presence consecrates the flesh!</td><br /></tr><br /><tr><br /><td><em>Janus! Sume noctem!</em></td><br /><td>Janus! Seize the night!</td><br /></tr><br /></table><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>New Personalities</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnCXrPL59T-lXdv9yDJGi0puykptEqIrLGKYMs85E7fB6ej6apaKeqX96iuDyqYmXoc4T_5T-Nl9WrEVFLrLlSZdhtKCCEJQQmV7AWHKym10B6fH61xo3IZ-Y8iZl02qhWasVW4D1UA8k/s1600-h/h12.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnCXrPL59T-lXdv9yDJGi0puykptEqIrLGKYMs85E7fB6ej6apaKeqX96iuDyqYmXoc4T_5T-Nl9WrEVFLrLlSZdhtKCCEJQQmV7AWHKym10B6fH61xo3IZ-Y8iZl02qhWasVW4D1UA8k/s200/h12.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286885006153583074" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> If certain children were <em>already</em> monsters, what do they turn into?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You mean a monster putting on a monster costume?<br />Same as everyone else, I’d imagine. Depends on the costume.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It wouldn’t turn into a monster times two? Monster Squared?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Magic works the same for everyone. It’s the great equalizer. It takes a while longer for the teenagers to transform. Probably because they’re bigger.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander makes a convincing soldier. Or not.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Apparently real soldiers only speak in monotone. And <em>hello</em>—it’s not a machine gun, subtitles! it’s an M-16 rifle.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Silly subtitles.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Halloween Terror</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUvZsnlMBuQKRwvbAeiN6hjFguA3HFfh4GzfdVU00mfGeAYiydmtT86O1fkkb4BPVXIbh98SIUHAAuVZN7RZl8SAffq5P7XuNQyHD1HVpzlXdWjatSU5LgPBDyJFG0FgkdICZHpEfIBHc/s1600-h/h14.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUvZsnlMBuQKRwvbAeiN6hjFguA3HFfh4GzfdVU00mfGeAYiydmtT86O1fkkb4BPVXIbh98SIUHAAuVZN7RZl8SAffq5P7XuNQyHD1HVpzlXdWjatSU5LgPBDyJFG0FgkdICZHpEfIBHc/s200/h14.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286886428324160434" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not much recoil on that rifle. And take it easy, Xander…those cartridges only have 30 rounds.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Spike’s right. It <em>is</em> neat.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He must really think so. He’s walking around, all vamped out. There’s a lot of really nifty small touches in this sequence, if you’re paying attention.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh, here we go. What’d I miss?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, there’s Cordelia “Thanks” to Xander when he gives her his jacket. Touch of surprise there.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You could tell she kind of liked Army Xander.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you notice that Xander had tats?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Missed it.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBPQQ2EIKk9MI6Pm67ZsRoQkcy67sl55Uvtiu-WUJlznu4dOk7cHY_xyNXdkNa1gnpDvorB9vyjHtSEWmt0h2YwuyUR1YUD4ElJFGqLZalW5DKamX5xLraG3DM5hk6HGAGslWkYZ__cNE/s1600-h/h13.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBPQQ2EIKk9MI6Pm67ZsRoQkcy67sl55Uvtiu-WUJlznu4dOk7cHY_xyNXdkNa1gnpDvorB9vyjHtSEWmt0h2YwuyUR1YUD4ElJFGqLZalW5DKamX5xLraG3DM5hk6HGAGslWkYZ__cNE/s200/h13.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286886003823316050" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Of course, there’s the situational irony with Cordelia saying, <font color=yellow>“Who died and made <em>her</em> the boss?”</font color> as Willow walks through the wall behind her back.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That was funny.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And that was quite a sneakup Willow puts on Giles.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought Giles had wet himself. <strong>One moment he’s cross-referencing, and the next he’s all pee-pee pants.</strong><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia’s awesome at summarizing the action for latecomers: <font color=yellow>“They don’t know who they are. Everyone’s turned into a monster. It’s a <em>whole</em> big thing. How are you?”</font color> And in case you missed it, Giles takes a look at Willow’s outfit and says, <font color=yellow>“The ghost of <em>what</em>, exactly?”</font color> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s the Ghost of Slutoween Future, Giles!”<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhll1WyNAN4bR6gldfrknIiOjtvLNdq6DhWCEuz3F9FLZB1YvP-qT2_uBcU_p8xETsRNCI_WQ3Dlb6U0yVhR12Isc_AkpBtArgsuv9NZj8L5nVG1rvfsrSDf_cDRib2ehddI3eB6ciZcho/s1600-h/h15.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhll1WyNAN4bR6gldfrknIiOjtvLNdq6DhWCEuz3F9FLZB1YvP-qT2_uBcU_p8xETsRNCI_WQ3Dlb6U0yVhR12Isc_AkpBtArgsuv9NZj8L5nVG1rvfsrSDf_cDRib2ehddI3eB6ciZcho/s200/h15.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286886844529637554" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Ethan’s Costume Shop</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Spike’s talking to kids. Only he doesn’t know they’re kids.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s leading the tiny troops. He seizes opportunities when they present themselves.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhON0KXbjXHl56gdP23e2EaVSe7t03Zrlp2bbgboIXXZd31qB2UPCv31lPuVibNfsNCiW7PFDtaBFeyS9XZI1lXIiQw2vFQ48dKN5tnQMAix5vxQpU-yEAXRr5W4CxXPfrh4gVRvsTvceY/s1600-h/h16.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhON0KXbjXHl56gdP23e2EaVSe7t03Zrlp2bbgboIXXZd31qB2UPCv31lPuVibNfsNCiW7PFDtaBFeyS9XZI1lXIiQw2vFQ48dKN5tnQMAix5vxQpU-yEAXRr5W4CxXPfrh4gVRvsTvceY/s200/h16.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286887944093484818" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yar. It’s Larry the Pirate. Say, did you notice—<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> From Ethan’s Costume Shop? The sign that said “Check your bags with the cashier”?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When Willow leaves the shop…the curtain moves when she brushes against it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I did notice that. Very unghost-like. And she goes around Giles. You can go through him, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s rude for ghosts to just walk through people. And Willow isn’t rude.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you notice when Ethan said “Hello, Ripper”?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah. What was <em>that</em> about? (I’m being facetious. I <em>know</em> what it’s about.)<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgt9Xsi-q_u-cABTK6jE9bTBeIGdlRL1_f7QBjaP3jZJDgv23IQNnjMgisvCeOicvS5aYsq914-MwhWKKmuzE0x1aClfPOSwXxiWCAkLYFO-bwSDbRwNnVjJsph_DK4evx1Ar54ne0VxyM/s1600-h/h17.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgt9Xsi-q_u-cABTK6jE9bTBeIGdlRL1_f7QBjaP3jZJDgv23IQNnjMgisvCeOicvS5aYsq914-MwhWKKmuzE0x1aClfPOSwXxiWCAkLYFO-bwSDbRwNnVjJsph_DK4evx1Ar54ne0VxyM/s200/h17.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286888351608898770" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look…Xander gets his revenge on Larry, and saves Buffy as she saved him.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Aw, the circle of beating each other up. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“It’s strange, but beating up that pirate gave me a weird sense of closure.”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yar.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Old Friends</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFfaxeQTKmyHKYuMnJtJrhRbboxKluSyCvWYRwdiLr_yKh49CdbQysYOc-xyNMYuxyb9_she28Y80HnL9G_ZHDjk7pWd1BXX5GjEwChUvYQIR1lv29MA08MbpQ2wEqgVCU8pLbAP2oNJw/s1600-h/h18.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFfaxeQTKmyHKYuMnJtJrhRbboxKluSyCvWYRwdiLr_yKh49CdbQysYOc-xyNMYuxyb9_she28Y80HnL9G_ZHDjk7pWd1BXX5GjEwChUvYQIR1lv29MA08MbpQ2wEqgVCU8pLbAP2oNJw/s200/h18.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286888793608066866" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What? Giles <em>isn’t</em> innocent and good? Did you notice that part?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Actually, I was preoccupied. You know what the name Ethan Rayne reminds me of?…Chocolate Rain…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Please stop.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like the idea being pushed out here. <font color=yellow>“Quite a little act you’ve got going here,”</font color> says Ethan. Scoffs at the idea of him being the <font color=yellow>“tweed-clad guardian of the slayer.” </font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But he <em>is!</em><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqMuo797d31X1nl-PEK7IgyqGx-nl3Sa2ROpcJa8sM3sSv2FIaIvVpHZCTjMdfxpb0jasZnyJBTUd7z9j1cAGJj_KT28wb5tAcP3HEIeobmQY59oHoncX7ZAM-dXezvg8SXdmvNS2devQ/s1600-h/h19.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqMuo797d31X1nl-PEK7IgyqGx-nl3Sa2ROpcJa8sM3sSv2FIaIvVpHZCTjMdfxpb0jasZnyJBTUd7z9j1cAGJj_KT28wb5tAcP3HEIeobmQY59oHoncX7ZAM-dXezvg8SXdmvNS2devQ/s200/h19.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286889396933750130" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I thought this was extremely well-written. Giles, too, has been wearing a mask, just like most everyone else in this episode. He says he has become his act. Which is exactly what is happening in this episode to some of the characters. Cordelia, on the other hand, is who she is. She doesn’t change.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>DAMN</em>, Giles! sucker punch! That was cool.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You like this mask Giles has on?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The mask is what he takes off to punch him.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But his secret remains safe. He sends Willow away when he decides to whomp on him.<br /><br /><font color=yellow>Cordelia: “Oh, <em>faboo</em>. More clinging.”</font color><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Breaking the Spell</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles should be an Army interrogator. <em>At Guantanamo!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Geez, waterboard much, Giles?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That would have taken too long. Better just to kick Ethan when he’s down. Of course, he <em>was</em> being a smart ass. <font color=yellow>“Say pretty please.” </font color> So he kind of deserved it.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxsHfCACYYk0NjYuX1OAHr34dOzeQnTy_QhqPytrd6fjPiKUpMDPRBUexTsbtRE-GycRFkRSiyrLM87wtzhm70wkbIbOYDCOfJdopH7ojkKA_3X68nCcOjhXfPaTRlxHJ8_PYXYs2YkJw/s1600-h/h20.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxsHfCACYYk0NjYuX1OAHr34dOzeQnTy_QhqPytrd6fjPiKUpMDPRBUexTsbtRE-GycRFkRSiyrLM87wtzhm70wkbIbOYDCOfJdopH7ojkKA_3X68nCcOjhXfPaTRlxHJ8_PYXYs2YkJw/s200/h20.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286889930909394498" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Hi, honey. I’m home.”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s good to be me, she says. She’s learned a valuable life lesson. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That round goes to Buffy. She’s now 1-0-1 against Spike, according to my statistics. Spike definitely left the field.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Again, Spike doesn’t get staked. His skedaddle was fast, but not that fast.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And Angel, of course, just hangs back. La la.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They just don’t recognize a threat when they see one.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT3pr2PVuyWnzR02vkjfiPCH_KRNzmV-YJcQjHwnnWzpWcfu7bOfZ5OqvxDIRVfq5F4QUD9KClsKOD8WK4TbLIedFKAkx3DOlTloDLYmPU5sXWwsrVaoBR3bWHlNz6qRh3XTcyLZC0vTA/s1600-h/h21.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT3pr2PVuyWnzR02vkjfiPCH_KRNzmV-YJcQjHwnnWzpWcfu7bOfZ5OqvxDIRVfq5F4QUD9KClsKOD8WK4TbLIedFKAkx3DOlTloDLYmPU5sXWwsrVaoBR3bWHlNz6qRh3XTcyLZC0vTA/s200/h21.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286890454462231538" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow breaks the spell of her timidity, and <em>voila</em>, here comes Oz!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think she was just too tired to care anymore.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Fatigue does enter into many life decisions. Look! Oz’s van has the steering wheel on the right side. What’s that all about?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Trippy. And when she’s asking who’s that girl, we’re still asking: <font color=yellow>“Who is that guy?”</font color><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Real Girl</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgKbzHOH62flKJgq6zJJKkKBKO7WhUY16R76Xg4QfagJACXllMsFYpt6Tm4GMekRhj3c2Ss03cyL9QAgjRT9ROX5R-4bA3uIRN0YPgclDEqQeUBy4olRrXInIN-XfXX6dGRt3sz12Ewes/s1600-h/h22.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgKbzHOH62flKJgq6zJJKkKBKO7WhUY16R76Xg4QfagJACXllMsFYpt6Tm4GMekRhj3c2Ss03cyL9QAgjRT9ROX5R-4bA3uIRN0YPgclDEqQeUBy4olRrXInIN-XfXX6dGRt3sz12Ewes/s200/h22.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286891420734786578" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I know that you would like to be a “fancy girl.” Am I correct?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I would love to wear a dress like that once. Just to know what it was like.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m sure they’re available at costume shops, whale-bone shops, and, I would suspect, certain fetish websites. Sounds painful. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles comes back to find the shop abandoned, but Ethan’s no fool…he took the stock with him.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I noticed that too. He needed that merchandise.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Be Seeing You” says the ominous note. But what I liked best was Ethan’s logo with the drama masks. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAvdNZqlrlZ3FGY99UICxToBHlvs99iawi4qKIApN6S7Z-NSaGL7CO0qt0qdx9B579mQwAYWtFZpbjrx15zz6sYhxcfbzhIKeSrjMa2ppHrWDedHnCMqlWZgbG305_pmEtbv3Qz-jZ8fA/s1600-h/h23.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAvdNZqlrlZ3FGY99UICxToBHlvs99iawi4qKIApN6S7Z-NSaGL7CO0qt0qdx9B579mQwAYWtFZpbjrx15zz6sYhxcfbzhIKeSrjMa2ppHrWDedHnCMqlWZgbG305_pmEtbv3Qz-jZ8fA/s200/h23.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5286891605251029330" /></a><br /><br />Next Time: <font color=yellow>"Lie To Me."</font color><br /><em></em>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-59786473531399251982008-12-28T18:01:00.000-08:002008-12-28T19:00:12.874-08:00Buffy the Animated SeriesThanks to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/TheSnerd">TheSnerd </a>for this find...how disappointing this was never picked up. If <em>American Dad</em> can continue to exist...?!<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/mnUvZP7-5LM&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/mnUvZP7-5LM&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />The following is a creation by <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/Yunasky20">Yunasky20</a>. It speaks for itself:<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/rys1fClSLQw&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/rys1fClSLQw&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-87667533196257915792008-12-26T22:39:00.000-08:002008-12-27T00:07:38.329-08:00Reptile BoySeason Two, Episode Five<br />12/26/08<br /><br />Merry Christmas! <font color=purple>SHE</font color> is excited about getting a Kit-Kat clock for Christmas, while <font color=red>HE</font color> is thrilled about getting the fifth season of <em>The A-Team</em>, but wonders where he can pick up a decent copy of <em>Jesus El Nino Dios</em>. In this episode, we learn about the secret influence of the Illuminati in Sunnydale, what Buffy and Sisyphus have in common, and contemplate the perpetual humiliation of Xander.<br /><br /><h3>A Quiet Evening? </h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Bollywood movies on TV. I like their idea of fun. I wish we got those here.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m sure you can get them on Netflix. But why would you <em>want</em> to? Only one person out of the three got it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh honey. You don’t have to understand art to appreciate art. Xander haging out with the girls here, which is oddly appropriate.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Interesting he doesn’t turn out to be gay.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think that was ever definitively established.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMT0TXkJx1QISgra7PP1MutqWu6_8bSzsOaN7kWwA1l-vjld9F-BadMqBjsq-F9fW1eEFRLYK4mUBySdsgfLzVJxZYK7IMGU4_Vbsas0D0zLlwmDzCp-NOs2L4NnJZAZCGlicLahGhiAY/s1600-h/rb2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMT0TXkJx1QISgra7PP1MutqWu6_8bSzsOaN7kWwA1l-vjld9F-BadMqBjsq-F9fW1eEFRLYK4mUBySdsgfLzVJxZYK7IMGU4_Vbsas0D0zLlwmDzCp-NOs2L4NnJZAZCGlicLahGhiAY/s200/rb2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284357855828734722" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Run, girl, run! The cemetery is that close?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It would have been hilarious if Callie would have climbed over the fence, and then the guys in the hoods would have ran through the open door right next to it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or even better, they all got killed by vampires lurking in the cemetery.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or by the <a href="http://www.conspiracyarchive.com/">Illuminati</a>. Why is there a pyramid in this park?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe it’s the Freemasons. <br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>School Chat</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I can’t believe Cordelia is studying this stuff.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s thinking about her future. I think it’s commendable.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You would.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love Cordelia’s forced laughter. She has a classy look this episode.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Speaking of horrible shirts!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t notice it. Maybe I’ve just become inured.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a horrible shirt. Puke green.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> On second thought, it is horrible. I thought it was a jacket, which would be at least forgiveable.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhha1BtI6Wk81tLIZ9bBF5oGdZWr0SMCIAIhwCz59Zr1lIZGHdQlPDxoYrMdULfhKWIaZjV7l18jqjd0eRgWzMzNt894p_fs4JdSHrsCNxfFvsyoT6tKlSI2Yf3bV876Ol45prbVUjhiMM/s1600-h/rb3.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhha1BtI6Wk81tLIZ9bBF5oGdZWr0SMCIAIhwCz59Zr1lIZGHdQlPDxoYrMdULfhKWIaZjV7l18jqjd0eRgWzMzNt894p_fs4JdSHrsCNxfFvsyoT6tKlSI2Yf3bV876Ol45prbVUjhiMM/s200/rb3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284358309379103890" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“You’ll go to college someday, Xander. I just know your pizza delivery career will take you so many exciting places.” </font color> That was an awesome burn, Cordelia!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He stops to get burned by Cordelia. He can never think of anything to say back.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He gets the first strike in, but never the last. Cordelia’s friend sort of looks like Beth from News Radio. I love her.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There’s lots of women in TV land you love.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But my heart belongs to you, baby.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOY-OJ4vo_PwRziNNKmrqshqr6sXLoZHmhHmSzG-rtU3Ak_RbJcpazLHg4qO5C4dXelQT3EjmDzJUlPAeMArfuLzJPvHlIYRkURLmiKsC6jVdKsSGckEzYTkMSOzNwijZ5J3pM77WWd4A/s1600-h/rb4.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOY-OJ4vo_PwRziNNKmrqshqr6sXLoZHmhHmSzG-rtU3Ak_RbJcpazLHg4qO5C4dXelQT3EjmDzJUlPAeMArfuLzJPvHlIYRkURLmiKsC6jVdKsSGckEzYTkMSOzNwijZ5J3pM77WWd4A/s200/rb4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284358826236030498" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why does Giles even try that shiznit with Buffy? He should just stick with Lecture-Fu.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s his strongest weapon.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Destroying Buffy’s will to live with his talking. Meanwhile, Giles all, <font color=yellow> “We all have to do things we don’t like.” </font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Unfortunately, Buffy, you have to do them all the time. And death will be your only release.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s the Sisyphus of Sunnydale!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Who’s Sisyphus again? You have to tell me, because I have a life.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Har har. <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sisyphus">Sisyphus was that Greek guy who had to push the rock up the hill</a>, only to have it roll down when he got near the top. Then he’d have to do it all over again. For eternity.<br /><font color=purple>Well, that would suck.</font color><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>A Party</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So Xander’s skipped 3 classes. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We can’t really wonder why he doesn’t get any brighter as the show goes on.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This part is unbelievable. Would college guys really want to hang out with high school girls?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Are you serious?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They’re at the age where it really doesn’t matter?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think they’re portraying these frat guys as predators. I too think it’s a little creepy for college seniors to be trolling the high school looking for dates, but I can totally see it happening. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How often did you troll high schools when you were in college?<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic68lx7He9djaTP0FnI94mzA_lqa70MZ79fYBXObe7GOkHdXv0karTVGtuRBlhnFpqPR-bC0LtEF8usLJzSMR4r4SO31-q7QQbmtZ3vrjTUrEmROHSMZGaOhW91aNxRSqhD83Jkmgchp4/s1600-h/rb5.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic68lx7He9djaTP0FnI94mzA_lqa70MZ79fYBXObe7GOkHdXv0karTVGtuRBlhnFpqPR-bC0LtEF8usLJzSMR4r4SO31-q7QQbmtZ3vrjTUrEmROHSMZGaOhW91aNxRSqhD83Jkmgchp4/s200/rb5.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284360020718404354" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s not relevant. What’s relevant is the giraffe pants Buffy is wearing. Also the fact that Richard appears to be wearing lipstick.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe he just came from a gay bar.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I also like Cordelia’s inappropriate laughter.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Again. Duly noted. HA HA HA HA HA!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hilarious.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander should take notes on how Tom woos Buffy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If that other guy wasn’t such a douchebag, I’d say it was good cop/bad cop. This is kind of an instructional video about being a wingman.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCQTMA-YIEj_gDkcQg59jv00rYmYfC_TtFm2-5D9X6LaL33_HWWJbBGmAPoSQJ2Z37fRltDqcQbx6d5Bt2AMxNVATW73iABkD5eN6ZDIO0Z2WIJisYIRoj4MGfjThZynrtBjOXp9vJcqE/s1600-h/rb6.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCQTMA-YIEj_gDkcQg59jv00rYmYfC_TtFm2-5D9X6LaL33_HWWJbBGmAPoSQJ2Z37fRltDqcQbx6d5Bt2AMxNVATW73iABkD5eN6ZDIO0Z2WIJisYIRoj4MGfjThZynrtBjOXp9vJcqE/s200/rb6.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284360661880340882" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So Richard’s repelling Buffy towards Tom?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Brilliant strategy. Then Giles comes in, all heavy-handed. He’s really being kind of a dick in this episode.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> More reverse psychology.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Practice and Patrol</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why does Giles even bother with attacking her?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What exactly is Giles teaching Buffy during these practice sessions? How to avoid breaking someone’s face? How to pull your punches?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, because she really doesn’t beat him up very badly.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He’s teaching her self-restraint?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Kind of counter to the cause.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hello, it’s Angel! That counts as a sneak-up! She jumped and everything.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Count it!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“I was just thinking…”</font color> You know, every time Buffy is “thinking,” it usually presages something really bad happening. You ever notice that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Her being lost in thought is a catalyst?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Exactly. It’s like she has this power that when focused, is deadly and overpowering, but is constantly being defused by stupid stuff and side issues.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And that’s when things go wrong.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Right. Not only in this episode, or this season, but the whole series, I’d argue.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So Angel’s messing with her mind in this episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yepperoonie.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixEWgut8ooJ-kbhb5YRPiQ3cjs8hCwJ0hUvmpnC33qvfycgC4gG3TPG7T5svYJCxoouhyphenhyphenMrNzagM18_RetNYCML3NGE2TE6mNjTotb2HNNq3O6MMhLkywzLPYdhOiwatN6WTJjd_PqBfg/s1600-h/rb1.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixEWgut8ooJ-kbhb5YRPiQ3cjs8hCwJ0hUvmpnC33qvfycgC4gG3TPG7T5svYJCxoouhyphenhyphenMrNzagM18_RetNYCML3NGE2TE6mNjTotb2HNNq3O6MMhLkywzLPYdhOiwatN6WTJjd_PqBfg/s200/rb1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284357227516488162" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow> “This isn’t a fairy tale. When I kiss you, you don’t wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after.”</font color> That was pretty cool.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Intense. Then you paused it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I had to watch it again. Sorry about that.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was in the moment until you “had to watch it again.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And then Buffy says, <font color=yellow>“When you kiss me, I want to die.” </font color> I love lines that give you pause, and don’t have all their meaning and layers immediately laid out for you.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Part of her wants to succumb, and it makes perfect sense.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s warring with herself. There’s the French <em>le petit mort</em>, the little death, a euphemism for orgasm that this line seems to allude to, as well. Having one’s identity subsumed into someone else’s?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s all or nothing with teenagers. At certain moments, Buffy and Angel were very passionate.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Except for the cookie dough metaphor. I can never forgive that goofery.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Party Invitation</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeRSAA4AueWLCI9pq94TqQKbOfQ0kXzwfNW3dEvKSRjgout7uXhsd4WksZJcgJ2XvQBIWsYh2IB2Lxh02sHPu4GrgKw6xUw4WIgwP9elRBoxhHmltTtvc4AA8hNeKIOaMFaxuaVjOzEMQ/s1600-h/rb8.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeRSAA4AueWLCI9pq94TqQKbOfQ0kXzwfNW3dEvKSRjgout7uXhsd4WksZJcgJ2XvQBIWsYh2IB2Lxh02sHPu4GrgKw6xUw4WIgwP9elRBoxhHmltTtvc4AA8hNeKIOaMFaxuaVjOzEMQ/s200/rb8.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284361983404325890" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia looks great in that tank top and black bra. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy curled her hair. It looks pretty.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Whenever there’s an extended period of serious ritual, you know something humorous is a comin! <font color=yellow>“Brewski time!” </font color> And there it is!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you notice one of the brethren whistling as he was coming down the stairs?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least we didn’t hear a bong percolating.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>The Bracelet</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUn2xYs7eEbJSo2kOXhw-L3Lx5SkEkFlZBVaMiIYcQ8jR4NewPQNK3qAp6DnwhKOHXn7cffkguGQ48Wz271HFV-IWN406ZzjALTdoPZjVo1oQXVkZnUIKbOB-NkufaQmmJTGlHxZAVay8/s1600-h/rb9.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUn2xYs7eEbJSo2kOXhw-L3Lx5SkEkFlZBVaMiIYcQ8jR4NewPQNK3qAp6DnwhKOHXn7cffkguGQ48Wz271HFV-IWN406ZzjALTdoPZjVo1oQXVkZnUIKbOB-NkufaQmmJTGlHxZAVay8/s200/rb9.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284362484106102578" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look! A card catalog! That’s so hot!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Made me feel a little weepy. I love a good card catalog. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> With actual cards.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Are kids allowed to jump on the counters at your library?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think our librarian would disintegrate them with her laser eyes.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look! Willow’s jeans have been bedazzled! There’s a flower embroidered on them!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I missed the bedazzled jeans!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You really need to develop an eye for this sort of detail.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I usually catch the detail.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia is doing Buffy a favor—teaching her how to be a wingman.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s commendable that she’s so straightforward with Buffy. She’s a real pedagogue.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxDkr9X5zdFroOdk4o8t2U-NHcfucjiYiGxG1K8taCk1oQL3K3XOI6gyQpTdYxtqs-qEH6ixV7Gyi0JGwgxXt9fdf8oziu-pTo8koyDPkKIpjExiqFPsuvW6md7g0SnEke7S-e1qQ-aYI/s1600-h/rb10.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxDkr9X5zdFroOdk4o8t2U-NHcfucjiYiGxG1K8taCk1oQL3K3XOI6gyQpTdYxtqs-qEH6ixV7Gyi0JGwgxXt9fdf8oziu-pTo8koyDPkKIpjExiqFPsuvW6md7g0SnEke7S-e1qQ-aYI/s200/rb10.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284363048982608818" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Another Cordelia classic coming up: <font color=yellow> “You could belong to a fraternity of rich and powerful men…in the Bizarro World.” </font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Burned again! Dang! You should be keeping track.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“That’s not askew. That’s cockeyed.” </font color> Good one, Xander. If I were writing a poem about Xander, I think I’d call it, Xander’s Ballad of a Townie. Because it’s really quite sad.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But Willow’s a townie. And she doesn’t suffer the same mental setbacks.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s because Willow, unlike Xander, is actually competent at a few things.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So Xander’s pretty much stuck in Sunnydale.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There’s always the Army! But we get ahead of ourselves.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>The Fraternity</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Cordy having a fender bender on the way in.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She never really masters driving. That’s something she and Buffy actually have in common.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s right. Buffy is a bad driver, too. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHMfKTm6jyIhU5qRWW9IfhI4L6dB1_VbzFeq5vUJomNjDJqb0bsnAN6ci2CTws3ihOdnL-J58S1RVIn-6dAr8UHb3GP-sbF3zulK52cT5-R40ngqV9jjeUNXVQ3kAgzQEueck8rm0r7AA/s1600-h/rb11.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHMfKTm6jyIhU5qRWW9IfhI4L6dB1_VbzFeq5vUJomNjDJqb0bsnAN6ci2CTws3ihOdnL-J58S1RVIn-6dAr8UHb3GP-sbF3zulK52cT5-R40ngqV9jjeUNXVQ3kAgzQEueck8rm0r7AA/s200/rb11.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284363688518832610" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’ve never been to a frat party.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Neither have I. Too bad Xander didn’t stay away. He never has much luck at these things.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He served no purpose at this party other than to entertain the frat guys.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He advanced the plot wagon. Somebody had to tell Angel and Giles what was going on, and everyone else had been roofied.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He told Angel and Giles what they already knew. And he pointed out that the guys were wearing hoods. Wow, that was really the difference maker.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m sure there was a good reason to make sure that Xander got humiliated. There has to be. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigUT0wCTr6YnXN-MEL_j-8O4V6kAo_BcG64yC8EBa3XRQaSc1cpPe4nE_KIyhiHdWiHB8LG4bteJCvgmJy592D2L01jZGz9cKS0jmkKtvK9746FEAEYks4GnKcOY1ezLeUC7j_8YnTQUA/s1600-h/rb12.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigUT0wCTr6YnXN-MEL_j-8O4V6kAo_BcG64yC8EBa3XRQaSc1cpPe4nE_KIyhiHdWiHB8LG4bteJCvgmJy592D2L01jZGz9cKS0jmkKtvK9746FEAEYks4GnKcOY1ezLeUC7j_8YnTQUA/s200/rb12.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284364186061005314" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander failed in his mission. He didn’t find Buffy. Instead, he starts dancing and chatting up those girls.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He had to tell them it might have been a cult.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe the purpose was just to show where Xander existed in the social order.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And to have him dress up like <em>Rocky Horror.</em><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPMUSBLzK3-ug80SRMzp3tS1YJPu8ObLxysEJiExwlml6oh6F8qVl49fArHB99CXJw2eSLcoCHPwrfZ6mtkRcjhz4-wYDKis9OJ9AipOXDIQnp1GHgl6dl53_oYVPe6c82YXFUYlrfdO0/s1600-h/rb13.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPMUSBLzK3-ug80SRMzp3tS1YJPu8ObLxysEJiExwlml6oh6F8qVl49fArHB99CXJw2eSLcoCHPwrfZ6mtkRcjhz4-wYDKis9OJ9AipOXDIQnp1GHgl6dl53_oYVPe6c82YXFUYlrfdO0/s200/rb13.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284364682383027090" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>A Missing Girl</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPPR4Tu0izzyIz_QHwSiJywxjyEPja3FF4msWPKCYm2GbBlNUG154qmZ3lJ6dIv7PHgXCXWDfnbkLayDCmvXG78JC278GXVRnpY8jR2zTbM7qqQoci3jw60mhgFCRWx1tdn8S9q0PWxMA/s1600-h/gordon+gecko.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 130px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPPR4Tu0izzyIz_QHwSiJywxjyEPja3FF4msWPKCYm2GbBlNUG154qmZ3lJ6dIv7PHgXCXWDfnbkLayDCmvXG78JC278GXVRnpY8jR2zTbM7qqQoci3jw60mhgFCRWx1tdn8S9q0PWxMA/s200/gordon+gecko.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284365975778517186" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That frat guy is wearing a v-neck sweater and a t-shirt.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Very 90’s. I liked that look.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And the douchebag is boasting about his Argentinian junk bonds that just matured into double digits…what the hell does that even mean? Somebody get Patrick Bateman or Gordon Gecko or somebody to explain this to me.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don't know who any of those people are.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Buffy in Trouble</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvG9dQ7iHzm2vdiiCwgoTsAFLPdsKCojcJ2tPaxBnNGCnQvrbxDENlR9ZInLkZqw9Mg3xjBvAHWJ-km-vNXqaHybsYGgMMaIp7LYEB7roAtyt2AuzqvkZz2s_HJ9B2lo7aghCW0AeS-wA/s1600-h/rb14.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvG9dQ7iHzm2vdiiCwgoTsAFLPdsKCojcJ2tPaxBnNGCnQvrbxDENlR9ZInLkZqw9Mg3xjBvAHWJ-km-vNXqaHybsYGgMMaIp7LYEB7roAtyt2AuzqvkZz2s_HJ9B2lo7aghCW0AeS-wA/s200/rb14.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284366502786682418" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy was roofied before roofies were cool. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Roofies were never cool. As Xander is being kicked out, he finally remembers Buffy. His whole reason for being there.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> In Xander’s defense (and I can’t believe I’m mouthing those words), that party was a lot more coolness than he was used to. Maybe he just couldn’t handle it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He got distracted. I can’t believe you’re defending Xander.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Compared to other behaviors in this episode, his isn’t really that bad. Look at Buffy. You just got slipped a mickey, so what do you do? Wander upstairs to a vacant bedroom. Ingenious!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She just wanted to lie down. And everyone knows once you’ve been mickied, you’re not going to be shrewd in all your decisions.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Boy, do I know that.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Those paisley bedcovers belong in a hotel. I know, because I used to work at one.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The room looks way too nice. I know, because I’ve seen college rooms.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Snap! Tom Warner is not a gentleman!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He seems sinister now. Plus his chest looks disgusting.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I remember that fad. Only it was branding, and not…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Carving? Eww!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Talking to Angel</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How does Angel shave? It is difficult, but possible, to shave without a mirror.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How many band-aids do you need at the end?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Depends. Are you using a regular razor, or one of those big-ass <em>Sweeney Todd</em> blades?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Machida…isn’t he the guy that makes the spoons and plates and knives?<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV_FJqCKXF4nzO4mMrjuSoROgfRtDV1HeesUiEbBZwcfnwsN66BQcDotyOfcOGgq1tbWdm1yhG05hbyF1fxlyRLw_LJqOz9SRiV-ENYile7BGzKAghsEYKVONm5o1ndOL4p0YV7jM5IOM/s1600-h/rb15.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV_FJqCKXF4nzO4mMrjuSoROgfRtDV1HeesUiEbBZwcfnwsN66BQcDotyOfcOGgq1tbWdm1yhG05hbyF1fxlyRLw_LJqOz9SRiV-ENYile7BGzKAghsEYKVONm5o1ndOL4p0YV7jM5IOM/s200/rb15.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284367026399367682" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Actually it’s Mikita. Maybe that’s why our economy is in the dumper. These guys were stopped from making their offerings.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I heard that a virgin girl is worth 300 points on the Dow. At least they’re properly humble around Machida. They attribute all their success to him.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s the appropriate way to worship.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You so seldom see that nowadays with demon worship. You make the sacrifice, get the bounty, and then prance about like it was all your doing.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Calling Machida</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEhfIMOhtjwu62VqRprDDyTXwrtByaTh5pwufCt5ks5sj9AHt12zPpdKSxH97DAlwYSbmIFLmkZNVcyHTzwtvM6uMvb8GKkJk4sQMAYI4qH_2aiHvGlWFkIlAYEluI067g_R6P3GBDnfc/s1600-h/rb16.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEhfIMOhtjwu62VqRprDDyTXwrtByaTh5pwufCt5ks5sj9AHt12zPpdKSxH97DAlwYSbmIFLmkZNVcyHTzwtvM6uMvb8GKkJk4sQMAYI4qH_2aiHvGlWFkIlAYEluI067g_R6P3GBDnfc/s200/rb16.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284368271110959922" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not one of Cordelia’s better moments. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Even the victim on the left is tired of Cordelia’s idiocy.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why can’t Buffy get out of this already?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy—get some leverage against the wall and <em>push</em>, girl! Don’t just shake the chains!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s like she forgot all her training.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles needs to prepare her for situations like these. obviously. Since they tend to be the ones she finds herself in on regular occasions.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He could turn the library into a S&M chamber.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m shocked. And strangely intrigued.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRdurpNWmdG93TWfUnJDIG__rOEvPl_HjoXn4VnRqACcoIyc8nY0TNkTApC5PJgWqrv5tmbebpSj-UZkXjisUFsVBTTVPpoxvhGRmJjeyXYdI9LmZvc1sn9HwA5Z3S7mk4v-ZZbLJmPbg/s1600-h/rb17.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRdurpNWmdG93TWfUnJDIG__rOEvPl_HjoXn4VnRqACcoIyc8nY0TNkTApC5PJgWqrv5tmbebpSj-UZkXjisUFsVBTTVPpoxvhGRmJjeyXYdI9LmZvc1sn9HwA5Z3S7mk4v-ZZbLJmPbg/s200/rb17.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284368808263028210" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander snuck up on Angel. Crazy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Night is day. Dogs and cats, living together! But he finally turns out to be useful, because as you pointed out, he gives the group <em>valuable </em>information and they all lock elbows and go in to fight the bad guys.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Very funny, you. I want to know why they threw away that robe. Was there something wrong with it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe it had blood stains. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or some manner of stains, anyway.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yuck. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Big deal. You dry clean it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> These guys are so wealthy, they can afford to throw it out and buy a new one.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5HXtOlTMJCmDfufoRtkqgqmYPR70Hj3SkIbG_7M2iiUJwRpWiyQP7DVPgE-LZ1izQrw07NVGBWqd2oM-39WmGMXKHxBA6kFT-Xr2OsIqM8C1VVgWd-9THgobtOSAPGN92XMX3Pmv75TI/s1600-h/rb18.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5HXtOlTMJCmDfufoRtkqgqmYPR70Hj3SkIbG_7M2iiUJwRpWiyQP7DVPgE-LZ1izQrw07NVGBWqd2oM-39WmGMXKHxBA6kFT-Xr2OsIqM8C1VVgWd-9THgobtOSAPGN92XMX3Pmv75TI/s200/rb18.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284369228758877202" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“With Buffy!”</font color> That sort of came out of nowhere.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Angel vamps out because he loves his honey!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> In these early shows, however, it doesn’t take much for Angel and Spike to vamp out.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He went from zero to enraged in half a second. It was exciting.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It lacked depth and nuance.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>You </em>lack depth and nuance.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Take that back.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Fighting for Life</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy saves Cordy yet again. And out of all the saves, this one has to be the most irritating so far.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The situation was all her fault. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIr0DU7iAByb2cUUhFYMHfae5caXaKKIvHHD1Q9yB2r-X2zLtcyx4ZF_MLtkiYc5Ht0W3VNORgjEDynhPQhfjqE1be-3OMlbHcR2g4bkR28q7OoAV00bJM1X2x3F_oDsbcrTXhQ0LgHCc/s1600-h/rb19.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIr0DU7iAByb2cUUhFYMHfae5caXaKKIvHHD1Q9yB2r-X2zLtcyx4ZF_MLtkiYc5Ht0W3VNORgjEDynhPQhfjqE1be-3OMlbHcR2g4bkR28q7OoAV00bJM1X2x3F_oDsbcrTXhQ0LgHCc/s200/rb19.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284369684541364338" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow: <font color=yellow>“Some guy’s attacking Buffy with a sword. Also, there’s a big snake!”</font color> It’s the “also” that makes it hilarious.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Willow is quite helpful in this episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When she’s not running interference for Buffy and putting her in danger as a result.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy put herself in danger. Willow let the others know where she was.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not initially. Willow is an enabler.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When you’re a teenager, that translates to ‘really good friend.’<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Point taken, unfortunately.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6WZ_X14n9z7mY53DP42I7eQ3uJR6h3I4ZUCHk4jDEh40q1BdrJ4yKP9y4heoG2E8DIDEsxgqnfNhFkqtcoKwkFMyIzdmjjykpdeKdgzm8-BJJHbpFxzBgnHq8l38TGs5rbs1rBjiT7yo/s1600-h/rb20.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6WZ_X14n9z7mY53DP42I7eQ3uJR6h3I4ZUCHk4jDEh40q1BdrJ4yKP9y4heoG2E8DIDEsxgqnfNhFkqtcoKwkFMyIzdmjjykpdeKdgzm8-BJJHbpFxzBgnHq8l38TGs5rbs1rBjiT7yo/s200/rb20.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284370192483099762" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Let her go, Wormy.”</font color> Is it just me, or was Wormy, a.k.a. Machida, kind of a wuss?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He was easily slayed. It didn’t take much at all.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia: <font color=yellow>“You guys…I just hate you guys. The weirdest things just happen when you’re around.”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s classic. Through thick and thin, she blames them.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She hugs Angel, and avoids thanking Buffy, who did the saving.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>A Lesson Learned</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What lesson was learned in this episode?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The rich really are different. That’s what I took away from it. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I learned that making stupid decisions ultimately comes with no repercussions. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> If you went to a frat party, the snake would have eaten you.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What if I had gone to a sorority party?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The coven would have sacrificed you.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s hot.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhOhwx8NdPRzqivIjXUE5pH0cMltZl4Mc9RXHrufeS4Jo4ucheHVB78xqoXhP_qi-7xzh9cpUP8tPuqKjvmALGOYpHF_Ut8YnDkVPmDQuGkcMJqfxpORqI_xoeqHvHkjKQL4vVC3vrrlw/s1600-h/rb21.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhOhwx8NdPRzqivIjXUE5pH0cMltZl4Mc9RXHrufeS4Jo4ucheHVB78xqoXhP_qi-7xzh9cpUP8tPuqKjvmALGOYpHF_Ut8YnDkVPmDQuGkcMJqfxpORqI_xoeqHvHkjKQL4vVC3vrrlw/s200/rb21.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284370676574691730" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There goes Jonathan, serving Cordelia. Someone’s happy Cordelia didn’t get eaten by a giant snake.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She lets Jonathan think he has a chance if he gets her order right.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You mean cinnamon chocolate half caf, half fat, extra foam? I would have got it right.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Good for you.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I wrote dialogue that would fit the ending to this episode perfectly.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> About how Angel is now wearing lipstick?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No. Here it goes:<br /><br /><font color=green>YOU: So I hear this kitchen bakes really good cookies. Maybe you could make some sometime and I could eat them.<br />ME: Yeah. Sometime. I’ll let you know…</font color><br /><br />What? You didn’t like it? You’re like, <em>where’s Cordelia? I’m a character in the show now. I’ve got to go find her!</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, I was just stunned at how disconcerting your ending was. That character, i.e. me, should definitely have gotten to eat those delicious cookies.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Well, now you know how Angel felt when she walked away from him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Damn. You two are diabolical.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgISlU0etGtfpfSr9uZspyU3Uifoo6ppd0VUUPQbuIlG6WKUZ_Si6rI5m4RjdFAJJu-FCiw2JUf0Fibp4fxjjo0DDNqf0jMeUNWrs7Ki09ryj_ruq07qXrNIwFYEe9VKC5TFPMcxdFTLQ8/s1600-h/rb22.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgISlU0etGtfpfSr9uZspyU3Uifoo6ppd0VUUPQbuIlG6WKUZ_Si6rI5m4RjdFAJJu-FCiw2JUf0Fibp4fxjjo0DDNqf0jMeUNWrs7Ki09ryj_ruq07qXrNIwFYEe9VKC5TFPMcxdFTLQ8/s200/rb22.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5284371038253502018" /></a><br /><br />Next time: A Season Two favorite, <font color=yellow>"Halloween"</font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-20627167460521549012008-12-21T07:44:00.000-08:002008-12-21T10:44:43.548-08:00Inca Mummy Girl<h3>Season Two, Episode Four</h3><br />12/20/08<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3s_DIVD472Bw1nQINF9fAMZN0lH2X3LJe-dxpIp2JhzMge5I37kLhDVQYFT0Ywarw2vplxtiYFQzvBlfb2bfoaIO1DgtXZUgqlHDOu3MrNZQWAWRTeZaUAQHT4Vhg2_xRDVOz4OptnvE/s1600-h/img+1.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3s_DIVD472Bw1nQINF9fAMZN0lH2X3LJe-dxpIp2JhzMge5I37kLhDVQYFT0Ywarw2vplxtiYFQzvBlfb2bfoaIO1DgtXZUgqlHDOu3MrNZQWAWRTeZaUAQHT4Vhg2_xRDVOz4OptnvE/s200/img+1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282291965667092786" /></a><br />A <font color=green>Joyous Yuletide Season</font color> to you, Hellmouthers! Is it a messenger bag or a purse? <font color=purple>SHE</font color> thinks it’s a bag, while <font color=red>HE</font color> believes it’s a purse. In this episode, we learn about ancient Hebrew scrolls, collector plates, and the erotic appeal of the Twinkie.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><h3>The Mummy</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy says that there will be danger in her house within three days. It’s like Benjamin Franklin said—fish and visitors go bad after three days.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And unfortunately for Buffy, she does have danger within three days. Because she <em>boards</em> the bad guy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’d think Joyce would have sniffed that one out, her being from Peru and all.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Joyce isn’t from Peru.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Pardon my dangling participle. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvY-37s8knva8FNavTwn85KOJ3abR31ukosvqmOjqAw7UneIBoOqhyT501pCHyso_KrH4K8eo5DBfQ5RU1K12EIETA0JnEkKlGLijDjb4Kf2pgfCZR5qZc9_4xmc7fGC2xa7fnNXmt9yk/s1600-h/img+2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvY-37s8knva8FNavTwn85KOJ3abR31ukosvqmOjqAw7UneIBoOqhyT501pCHyso_KrH4K8eo5DBfQ5RU1K12EIETA0JnEkKlGLijDjb4Kf2pgfCZR5qZc9_4xmc7fGC2xa7fnNXmt9yk/s200/img+2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282292466190784770" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Rodney Munson shouldn’t be touching the masks. Why is he touching the masks?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why is he touching anything? And what’s a <em>megillah</em>?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s some sort of Jewish expression. Because Xander is Jewish, don’t you know.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought Willow was Jewish.<br /><br /><font color=orange>Editor’s Note:</font color> It’s the Hebrew word for scroll. Certain books of the Old Testament are read in their entirety on certain Jewish holidays. The Book of Esther is read on the Feast of Purim, and although the holiday is a happy one, sitting through Esther can be a trial, as it is tedious in all its detail. (Thanks to World Wide Words.) So to hear “the whole megillah” is to listen to a long, tedious story. It has nothing to do with the following:<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/vIL5EE_qxGA&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vIL5EE_qxGA&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6q0Td5M78ITY0PagVGuPWz2LWQlvJupcHeJvLTLgb7WiML6-s5Sp9lnB310EEXSATgnJk5w4dtOqy_EhK2UVGGy6Y__R-UHX0K6Bd1vnPPd2juhb9EJvbYz-ZFPX8Dnac8bwMqY1fBkg/s1600-h/img+3.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6q0Td5M78ITY0PagVGuPWz2LWQlvJupcHeJvLTLgb7WiML6-s5Sp9lnB310EEXSATgnJk5w4dtOqy_EhK2UVGGy6Y__R-UHX0K6Bd1vnPPd2juhb9EJvbYz-ZFPX8Dnac8bwMqY1fBkg/s200/img+3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282293409065521090" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look! a collector’s plate protects the mummy! Some do <em>not</em> gain in value!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like the predictability of the mummy grabbing Rodney when he breaks the plate. I do that to guests who break my plates.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t understand Rodney. His sole purpose here seems to be to get the plot wagon rolling. He’s touching stuff he’s not supposed to, and generally acting bizarre for no reason.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> In the beginning, all we know about Rodney is that he isn’t smart. He wasn’t malicious in his intentions. To get the story going, bring in a dumb person.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Joss could have had Xander break the plate.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That would have been cool.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And in keeping with his character, as he tends to bring most of his trouble on himself. Then you could have had economy of characters by eliminating Rodney.<br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Looking for Rodney</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpkQgZa__C_ofxaMTCiSv-4PuuMB78zSmm-ohGJB4Egf2BBbDgsviMnHKoOLMofFWwHq2R8rvjADpNKu64mSsehD8m1fy1cLimbXnhzjVSSrBUr-S-jTK7PKIunw2lbg3RpmzoOcULvtM/s1600-h/img+4.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpkQgZa__C_ofxaMTCiSv-4PuuMB78zSmm-ohGJB4Egf2BBbDgsviMnHKoOLMofFWwHq2R8rvjADpNKu64mSsehD8m1fy1cLimbXnhzjVSSrBUr-S-jTK7PKIunw2lbg3RpmzoOcULvtM/s200/img+4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282294226926805218" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Look! A dance at the Bronze! That rarely happens.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The S.H.S. World Cultural Dance. What does S.H.S. stand for?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Are you serious?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes…?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You really don’t know. Are you ready? Sunnydale High School.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was thinking…maybe Symbionese Hilarity Society, or…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Stop.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“I’m so stuffy, give me a scone.”</font color> Buffy should add that to all her exchanges with Giles, like the Arabs append “Death to Israel” to all their speeches, regardless of the content.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like scones.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s not true. No one likes scones.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I baked some a while ago, and you liked them.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s because they weren’t authentic British scones. Authentic British scones taste like rocks. <em>Everyone</em> knows that.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here Oz makes his first appearance.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes. He does. It’s kind of a crazy introduction. You’re just looking at Oz, and he’s talking about girls with some other guy, and it’s like, here’s a new character. Look at him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know Oz will be important because Joss does a close-up on his face. Several times. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqD_1CPxkc0XD8GIwH4f6wk1AtK1h_JLny5zgOW5c6FeHHWlkRzTG-VhyUwy-77AaYyEQz5aj0qkGSGHMLfB2boNueKJ5NgDrvt7IXNSlk3ADcBllsXMZE9UFEaVq2HIT6I_I6uVz7Ymo/s1600-h/img+5.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqD_1CPxkc0XD8GIwH4f6wk1AtK1h_JLny5zgOW5c6FeHHWlkRzTG-VhyUwy-77AaYyEQz5aj0qkGSGHMLfB2boNueKJ5NgDrvt7IXNSlk3ADcBllsXMZE9UFEaVq2HIT6I_I6uVz7Ymo/s200/img+5.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282294814160297378" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here comes Willow, all ready to paint the library.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She isn't wearing one here, but there will be lots of hats in this episode. I'm dreading it, really.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Lots of atrocious hats. The most atrocious hats Willow has worn to date.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You gotta feel bad for her, because she wants to be attractive, but every morning she ruins it by putting on a flipping hat.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A character who will not last long is the poncy guy with the knife.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He seems like an “unbudger.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> In all fairness, the Bush administration was packed with unbudgers.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That was bad.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Empada</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-m7X72ALGynTUIeUdbMiufjeDmiXUmytAD7Vgd292bMjB7nNq-Ph-R0syPBPJcNpFYphktI9inCJfkEhyxoYUQ6KUYCn4L4ZAb3BfhbI71EF5D3Ux4gfEh5unt0xo-KgQzX7w4v9xDoQ/s1600-h/img+7.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-m7X72ALGynTUIeUdbMiufjeDmiXUmytAD7Vgd292bMjB7nNq-Ph-R0syPBPJcNpFYphktI9inCJfkEhyxoYUQ6KUYCn4L4ZAb3BfhbI71EF5D3Ux4gfEh5unt0xo-KgQzX7w4v9xDoQ/s200/img+7.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282296727871177394" /></a><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXdGk7Uil2rfONeBV66oME81_x-uKeVL9MzhKXR0ErXShQYXdjX9RnF8F23OsxvCXh6KgNC8C7OgKrhlPE9ZxhGUqqbKaT5pbzQNvRdIfwAd3VTjGqzv86iwcVif0gM2XKh00lj-F3EP8/s1600-h/img+6.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXdGk7Uil2rfONeBV66oME81_x-uKeVL9MzhKXR0ErXShQYXdjX9RnF8F23OsxvCXh6KgNC8C7OgKrhlPE9ZxhGUqqbKaT5pbzQNvRdIfwAd3VTjGqzv86iwcVif0gM2XKh00lj-F3EP8/s200/img+6.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282296382235191842" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ampata, Empada? I wish they’d make up their minds up on his name. On the DVD menu, it’s Empada, but on the closed captions, it’s Ampata.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’d like to know how the mummy knew to go to the bus station to pick him up.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’d like to know how the mummy learned such perfect English while being stuck under a concrete slab for 500 years.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That was another thing I was going to marvel at. Maybe the Incan priests put some Berlitz courses in there for when she got bored.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’d also like to know where the mummy learned to master verbal irony. It leaks out in nearly everything Ampata says. How are things where you come from? Cramped and dead. <em>Oh ho ho, I get it!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Just a skosh of dramatic irony thrown in there, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> By the way, the actual exchange student’s sleeves are way too long for him.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But when she wears the shirt, it fits.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And it’s <em>hot.</em><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifORxfSMWVigX0IgbdhPG2yJ8jOoDoRjaQcipgvjtCTYXBOoBMDsIZQyJVaVwJqxvXzfTa8FHsfLyCB8GqhqDukgLr3qgKxUeqcnFSAfEIDOmcaHz2R3GnclRpWij2SP4fWwDIEjNVQhk/s1600-h/AmpatoSabancaya.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 134px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifORxfSMWVigX0IgbdhPG2yJ8jOoDoRjaQcipgvjtCTYXBOoBMDsIZQyJVaVwJqxvXzfTa8FHsfLyCB8GqhqDukgLr3qgKxUeqcnFSAfEIDOmcaHz2R3GnclRpWij2SP4fWwDIEjNVQhk/s200/AmpatoSabancaya.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282297888365102866" /></a> <br /><font color=orange>Editor's Note:</font color> It turns out that Ampato is a dormant volcano in the Andes of Southern Peru, as is Sabancaya, a larger, active volcano. Sabancaya is the god the Incas were trying to appease by their virgin sacrifices, you might recall.<br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>First Day of School</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjV2oSr_iudIwgIBtHQryp90IrZcGMw4XWkWCcCMDG8J2wjYFMzpzHC99xSDJRdjr_b_Lxv5tT3JMaPz3YbGxWYd4hfycgwBKc8buFYPZovma8CFDA7ZGssLY_3rBHtxTJxxN0-UxghebM/s1600-h/img+8.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjV2oSr_iudIwgIBtHQryp90IrZcGMw4XWkWCcCMDG8J2wjYFMzpzHC99xSDJRdjr_b_Lxv5tT3JMaPz3YbGxWYd4hfycgwBKc8buFYPZovma8CFDA7ZGssLY_3rBHtxTJxxN0-UxghebM/s200/img+8.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282298803637412690" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sven is hilarious. Dolph Lungren in a sweater.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t get the comedic value of Sven. If you could speak English, why did you stand there like a doofus?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s easy, for two reasons: 1) he was a one-note rimshot later on, and 2) he got caught in the Cordelia maelstrom, as we all do.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6pRhrmth_VZJw6PDcWBoJcgCqcv0DHOH5Y1rGUDnFQJl0056rczEhx7SO5YGRqYVS5MiogFDQMoABzaaTLEhxoYzz34CiBe_wjpXptLKHsU_ZS9FZAAVN9UOqo6P0Ik9pcYtSpzG7PwY/s1600-h/img+9.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6pRhrmth_VZJw6PDcWBoJcgCqcv0DHOH5Y1rGUDnFQJl0056rczEhx7SO5YGRqYVS5MiogFDQMoABzaaTLEhxoYzz34CiBe_wjpXptLKHsU_ZS9FZAAVN9UOqo6P0Ik9pcYtSpzG7PwY/s200/img+9.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282299278680310626" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’d you think of Oz with the soul patch?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s not a soul patch. He has some fuzz on the chin, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A lot redder than later on, too. And the zebra van makes its debut. We’ve got these peripheral figures flitting about like satellites in Season Two, Oz and Spike…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s what was missing in this episode. Couldn’t let Spike in because you let Oz in. I wonder if it’s an either/or. I’ll keep track of it.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfZGEoNcXAQnEmg2s-tOTxa9OLIfwxobmKgHwoeB3Ej68rZXtpZpcyjYFMrU1v5hpg2k7_X8s2PgvlDSlNoLDmhxWxqEk67wpvpF3uMeZcDbopOvK7ARtO4wn69Xfmw68YhHM3sRMySYc/s1600-h/img+10.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfZGEoNcXAQnEmg2s-tOTxa9OLIfwxobmKgHwoeB3Ej68rZXtpZpcyjYFMrU1v5hpg2k7_X8s2PgvlDSlNoLDmhxWxqEk67wpvpF3uMeZcDbopOvK7ARtO4wn69Xfmw68YhHM3sRMySYc/s200/img+10.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282299933837684338" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sweet Jesus WTH is <em>up</em> with Willow’s homeless hat?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s constant hattage for Willow. I guess it’s to make us feel sorry for her.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t feel sorry for anyone who chooses to put that garbage on her head.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> To me it says mental illness, hence my sympathy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hence my nausea.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRQR6Ci65-SOwTqsfqdB-1-2yMLskKEiA-rFUjj9lfqGZc935louHxnsMMtBwin4v1K7T1wSRhtyRUWhM5At21_WvzO7Z_rUVLdAZJvL9ioR-gJYOQYbiSRP2HOqPiJNkRY-gd0aeyGT0/s1600-h/img+11.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRQR6Ci65-SOwTqsfqdB-1-2yMLskKEiA-rFUjj9lfqGZc935louHxnsMMtBwin4v1K7T1wSRhtyRUWhM5At21_WvzO7Z_rUVLdAZJvL9ioR-gJYOQYbiSRP2HOqPiJNkRY-gd0aeyGT0/s200/img+11.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282300719058146514" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles figures the only way he can translate the plate is to get a teenager to translate it. <em>This is the best plan he could come up with?</em> It’s the equivalent of assuming the black student can teach him how to execute a pick and roll. Or asking an Asian kid for help with quadratic equations.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s desperate. There’s a mummy roaming around killing people. There’s no good reason for it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles is just being lazy. He’s mailing it in. But I suppose he can’t be “on” all the time.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe the theme in this episode is stupidity. If he hadn’t asked her, he would have gotten it right.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander’s wearing his man purse again…please make him stop.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s a messenger bag.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is Xander on a bicycle at any point in this episode?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No…but that doesn’t change the fact that is a messenger bag. I’m just happy he’s not wearing a patterned shirt. Any time he does, it is fugly.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s because he comes close to a romantic role in this episode. Can’t take someone seriously when they’re wearing textile barf.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And so we should not take Willow seriously in this episode because they keep slapping a hat on her head. Thank you for illuminating me.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Mummy’s Power</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtGTbzPXpXOB-egoQYETZqM0vbhE7uVeVYdNcqM-1fzY_YHD6ffuhEDjXeK7J5riMpdkMCAtjxlBXLKIJYXwidwdUCp0iywYIE9TWcjKGaFVc_B1jEGft4qyNZxfXheC9JZVkaQeKIMtc/s1600-h/img+12.bmp"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 149px; height: 112px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtGTbzPXpXOB-egoQYETZqM0vbhE7uVeVYdNcqM-1fzY_YHD6ffuhEDjXeK7J5riMpdkMCAtjxlBXLKIJYXwidwdUCp0iywYIE9TWcjKGaFVc_B1jEGft4qyNZxfXheC9JZVkaQeKIMtc/s200/img+12.bmp" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282303609889385186" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know, that Twinkie probably dates from Ampata’s time period. Because they’re supposed to last forever.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes. I get it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>Ampata probably could have deep-throated that thing if she wanted to.</strong> That’s just a guess.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yuck! At the very least she sucked the life out of it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I could have done with a longer shot of the Twinkie eating.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You wanted to watch <em>Xander</em> eat that Twinkie? This episode is doing bizarre things to all of us.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow says she has two choices. Of course, Willow has a <em>third</em> choice. Abandoning guys altogether. If you know what I mean, and I think you do.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Okay…<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Because later she turns <em>gay.</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, I got that.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Bodyguard</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This bodyguard sucks at his job. He’s 0-2 already.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s not good. He does make a good stalker, though. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes. No one ever sees him coming. Not Rodney, not Ampata, not…Buffy!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Chalk another up. Even though she doesn’t wig out like she usually does.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6cUpJofhesXVkr8YB_WhZpIHEs5n49K7DaBbWZLMye4p76LiryHFqyK6VQ4onluLuvAONuLUXXwOqsmXDWV3hnF3QITwokcsmg_OktJxM40qoEoH_ttlxkLCnr4d1_pjoqnXW-N6Vlqs/s1600-h/img+13.bmp"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 149px; height: 112px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6cUpJofhesXVkr8YB_WhZpIHEs5n49K7DaBbWZLMye4p76LiryHFqyK6VQ4onluLuvAONuLUXXwOqsmXDWV3hnF3QITwokcsmg_OktJxM40qoEoH_ttlxkLCnr4d1_pjoqnXW-N6Vlqs/s320/img+13.bmp" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282304465498231346" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Find the other pieces of the seal? That’s brilliant! It only took half the episode to come to that conclusion.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Watchers can’t be on all the time. I once tried to boil an egg in the microwave, and I’m a fairly good chef.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I guess you’re right. In all fairness, there are a lot of distractions everyone has to deal with in this episode. Although I’m not really sure what Giles’s problem is, because Jenny is nowhere to be seen. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey, you want to know what Xander’s big secret is?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> His secret is that <em>that is actually a girl’s purse.</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s a messenger bag. I’m going to beat you up.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Already Dead</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQjC4XI988hgNAXGGsef2LGcZ0Xytcb0tvx2BOfmOTKTHCx2sbTAOWwDb3_uFhHIGY6QnuS009w7r5UgvGc7uAJ5GbY9N869wMUsyRXfLj3OQLvDuct8NdtXiojVOyrK0BzNCJ0aeE1Xk/s1600-h/img+17.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQjC4XI988hgNAXGGsef2LGcZ0Xytcb0tvx2BOfmOTKTHCx2sbTAOWwDb3_uFhHIGY6QnuS009w7r5UgvGc7uAJ5GbY9N869wMUsyRXfLj3OQLvDuct8NdtXiojVOyrK0BzNCJ0aeE1Xk/s200/img+17.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282310014049681586" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This bathroom scene proves what we said. The bodyguard is excellent at stalking, and basically a sucky bodyguard, because he gets waylaid by a teenage girl.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She sucks him dry. And we’re talking <em>beaucoup</em> bucks moisturizer dry.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She says, “Gimme some sugar” to her bodyguard. And then he does. All of it. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And when she comes out of the bathroom, she looks fabulous, because she just ate a man.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She sucked the creamy filling out of his Twinkie.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Eww!</em><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why is Buffy so anxious to unpack Ampata’s crap?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s tired of loaning her everything.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Wait ‘til she gets a sister.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Chosen One</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGYtn9WkDL1iIxgBe7diu2oNsiQTOSmRFVmafDUf3_D5S3v1x0RYICCvEPC1DyaZ9EQoR5RRkn-h_vFLWDlTra89eYcXw-pOC84euirP1PSWBRZb03B9Z8g_3UOnNlTFJ3gRUUefDkmgM/s1600-h/img+16.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGYtn9WkDL1iIxgBe7diu2oNsiQTOSmRFVmafDUf3_D5S3v1x0RYICCvEPC1DyaZ9EQoR5RRkn-h_vFLWDlTra89eYcXw-pOC84euirP1PSWBRZb03B9Z8g_3UOnNlTFJ3gRUUefDkmgM/s200/img+16.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282307268320697922" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ampata is really sweet when she’s not sucking men dry. One could overlook the death stench on her.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I'm sure her breath is extremely horrible. I like Xander’s costume with the hat and the gaucho poncho. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Too bad it doesn’t reflect a real culture.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It reflects the culture of Leone. Sergio Leone, not Sierra Leone.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzgB8b5O09KolfkUViDxuz_aEoLfHGlIlutTd0S5VjZhSTMqVUNOZXqoJ8E0Qrh85iq2aaUv3gxKEhVYsEYLHJGCTHoKvsh1sflaS5tQ2RvnDd8QhqDR_SUOfeTjpmgOpGVw2csQrk6oM/s1600-h/img+18.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzgB8b5O09KolfkUViDxuz_aEoLfHGlIlutTd0S5VjZhSTMqVUNOZXqoJ8E0Qrh85iq2aaUv3gxKEhVYsEYLHJGCTHoKvsh1sflaS5tQ2RvnDd8QhqDR_SUOfeTjpmgOpGVw2csQrk6oM/s200/img+18.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282310706613019842" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I nearly shat myself when Joyce popped out of nowhere for her cameo.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was startled. Suddenly, there’s Joyce.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I thought I was going to have to add to the Buffy Surprise-o-Meter.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She does it again for her other line.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Freaky! This disembodied head pops in to say something maternal. <em>Shiver!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s like a reverse Keyser Sozhe. And poof! she was there.<br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Trunk</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Dingoes Ate My Baby</em> makes its Buffy debut. What do you think of the band?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Four Star Mary</em> wrote their music.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Who the hell is <em>Four Star Mary</em>?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They’re the ones who wrote their music.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ckjsDpyJecM&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ckjsDpyJecM&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia looks great as a Hawaiian.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, she does. And she brings a man with horns on his head.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sven as a Viking…how original. Clearly that was Cordelia’s idea. You know, this event may have been misnamed. Willow as an Eskimo. Some dude dressed as a Hasidic Jew. I think this was actually <em>Dress as Your Favorite Cultural Stereotype Night</em>.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMRsisKb4H6xY0_tqY3juodFct_HaraDlxK6y1Cx_xbEbjsNNXXWPXSPY1sKmsvoI1Q-cFolfukpSxzcxXZaYJ9W5mGTF91ROLZW7HBkihfasXWl4M4wGUoT79wVQvlvVXJuWLT7mTVzY/s1600-h/img+15.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMRsisKb4H6xY0_tqY3juodFct_HaraDlxK6y1Cx_xbEbjsNNXXWPXSPY1sKmsvoI1Q-cFolfukpSxzcxXZaYJ9W5mGTF91ROLZW7HBkihfasXWl4M4wGUoT79wVQvlvVXJuWLT7mTVzY/s200/img+15.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282306416661709090" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What possessed Willow to pick that outfit?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe she was planning to match what Xander was originally going to wear.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He was coming as a whale?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sometimes you wish the show was longer. Then we wouldn’t have questions like these.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oz gets a lot of face time here. And by face time, I mean FACE time.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He takes up the whole screen. I think the writers want us to know he’s going to be a new character.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oz is one of the ones who was supposed to be killed off, but because of his popularity, wasn’t.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Dance with the Dead</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZcNhbp4643iwdqsKohwoaQqviIl2m_fKdPoJvlU5iLTcS3Vva0jWL-5RIQppD3zhP7_ctgzTn1KW604uIs15hCLb39KsCfs5IBIqpl6mxsgyDAE4Ifnd1512zFE9in2a9AIx2aPBPY2c/s1600-h/img+19.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZcNhbp4643iwdqsKohwoaQqviIl2m_fKdPoJvlU5iLTcS3Vva0jWL-5RIQppD3zhP7_ctgzTn1KW604uIs15hCLb39KsCfs5IBIqpl6mxsgyDAE4Ifnd1512zFE9in2a9AIx2aPBPY2c/s200/img+19.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282311261669678370" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oz has been hit with the lightning bolt. Or harpoon as it were.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The Willow-Xander thing must have been boring the writers.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is it wrong to say <em>love-harpoon</em>?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Yuck!</em><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ampata should go ahead and kiss Xander…she put enough lipstick on. He should be safe.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Instead, we watch the video montage of falling in love without kissing.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How very conservative! As most horror tends to be.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Then she freaks out and goes to make out with Jonathan backstage.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe it was the boner in Xander’s pants that freaked her out.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We’ll never know, will we?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, I think we know.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Kiss of Death</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Jonathan gets to the Inca mummy girl first! Hooray for him.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What culture was Jonathan from?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He was a cowboy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But he was wearing shorts!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe he was from the Village People. They’re a culture.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhevzyMa9-CXkjZzzOEwY-Hpm325j1dhh3sWgAq8R7QPP8ALqqmpzyxf0vaj08YZyMEQVLZx_3L-Qaafjtz9f90JHOajKhMJmo88IOjiiGfytqh35-CxyPRKAc_x_WbZd1ATDAe1UqpCUE/s1600-h/img+14.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhevzyMa9-CXkjZzzOEwY-Hpm325j1dhh3sWgAq8R7QPP8ALqqmpzyxf0vaj08YZyMEQVLZx_3L-Qaafjtz9f90JHOajKhMJmo88IOjiiGfytqh35-CxyPRKAc_x_WbZd1ATDAe1UqpCUE/s200/img+14.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282305590828783266" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This scene is very beige-colored. And dang these close-ups are extremely close-up in this show. I mean, Ampata’s head doesn’t fit in the screen they’re so big.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But you enjoyed Xander being sucked up, I’m sure.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I about feel sorry for him. Ampata’s like, <em>Oh, screw it</em>—she can’t resist her urges anymore. An allegory for teenage lust.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And just think, if Rodney had been brought up to behave, none of this would have happened.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRZwFyNHC13yDd2qEZKeaiX98zW-7uwhnKAmGJUFu69htMtN6eV0l4f_zLQ4XRY9zl6d9n53v4aV8qHCve1VnppeolmTJ97wWlmDM0r68L0Bu9__4sQRUnwE6-ZCVEfuOuupmz779sYyY/s1600-h/img+20.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRZwFyNHC13yDd2qEZKeaiX98zW-7uwhnKAmGJUFu69htMtN6eV0l4f_zLQ4XRY9zl6d9n53v4aV8qHCve1VnppeolmTJ97wWlmDM0r68L0Bu9__4sQRUnwE6-ZCVEfuOuupmz779sYyY/s200/img+20.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282312234188574306" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Empada’s Last Chance</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCHJVASobr6Yqeu4iyRIghJHVpVa5mMqTvl_hgWOiVCj8Sqvi9agfWvgElHrtmnPvin_S12FxcdT9yILA-8SFX_6ujxve6irpeaJptUFPWfoQ59Am-NgosRpCbbkn2D1kLhkjvH9D__ZI/s1600-h/img+21.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCHJVASobr6Yqeu4iyRIghJHVpVa5mMqTvl_hgWOiVCj8Sqvi9agfWvgElHrtmnPvin_S12FxcdT9yILA-8SFX_6ujxve6irpeaJptUFPWfoQ59Am-NgosRpCbbkn2D1kLhkjvH9D__ZI/s200/img+21.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282312851426604610" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Giles doing all the scholarship he should have been doing all along.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is that mystical rubber cement?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s an excellent point. I’m sure when that collector’s plate shattered, there were tiny bits that didn’t make it back onto the reassembled plate.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Meaning?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Meaning that mystical seal isn’t going to be 100% effective. Some Inca Mummy Girl might leak out.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oz misses his chance at Willow: <font color=yellow>“Who is that girl?”</font color> First time he says it, not the last.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And we’re all wondering, “Who are you?” We all know who that girl is.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmMXTwgu1AHKYtFTqg3zlhti2rC2XD7Ibu-TcpzRUVPGpztz03lPUNObPvuR6DOfro33mLwnDqn4SpCg7IilOnG4DRAdCEfBSuW1Nsvm2BRTVqKH43yaUnXkWG6-iTgZBNR7pu6nqQYyI/s1600-h/img+22.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmMXTwgu1AHKYtFTqg3zlhti2rC2XD7Ibu-TcpzRUVPGpztz03lPUNObPvuR6DOfro33mLwnDqn4SpCg7IilOnG4DRAdCEfBSuW1Nsvm2BRTVqKH43yaUnXkWG6-iTgZBNR7pu6nqQYyI/s200/img+22.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282313413816289042" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh! Is Ampata going to kiss Buffy? <em>Hot!</em> No, just threw them in the tomb. Oh! Is Ampata going to kiss Willow? <em>Hot!</em> No, here comes Xander. Dang, this scene <em>sucks.</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’d like to point out that in this scene Buffy is seriously dressed down.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think they wanted someone competing with Ampata.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s supposed to be the radiant one.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQp99vndkkDL6ftQDz6k8AlvBfR7xu3LWLhs3Nmc6nzeeVEvX5xXG5zsUX0t_BRfyyLMb43-HOyegBBB_4_6nJ9_2_RevKzD05S95-8vXM83hlOO0nFcH65ATW_py7l7RMdJcB5hq_2p4/s1600-h/img+23.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQp99vndkkDL6ftQDz6k8AlvBfR7xu3LWLhs3Nmc6nzeeVEvX5xXG5zsUX0t_BRfyyLMb43-HOyegBBB_4_6nJ9_2_RevKzD05S95-8vXM83hlOO0nFcH65ATW_py7l7RMdJcB5hq_2p4/s200/img+23.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282314021729457970" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sorry, Xander, for tearing the limbs off your date!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That was gross.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like how they didn’t muck up the <em>denouement</em> with a lot of talky-talky. The less said after an incident like that, the better.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They didn’t even mention how Xander cann’t get a normal date.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Too soon. Besides, he does that himself in the next scene.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Gypped</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWT6yqFc8FFttNZDV4Jqy8LbIs_Plv7y35f2yFnAyYaTUA9fUSe8sbupH9RXAQr4TsMTDIZ8z1RUxRuCh1CsdRUStxj95WAoKDNzrvTCQRCL6FCFiPtfbmXgHW2uU7nYFVnjDkgkpGKtQ/s1600-h/img24.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWT6yqFc8FFttNZDV4Jqy8LbIs_Plv7y35f2yFnAyYaTUA9fUSe8sbupH9RXAQr4TsMTDIZ8z1RUxRuCh1CsdRUStxj95WAoKDNzrvTCQRCL6FCFiPtfbmXgHW2uU7nYFVnjDkgkpGKtQ/s200/img24.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282314376474745938" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That is an atrocious skirt Buffy is wearing.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I hate the white one she wore in the beginning much more.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Sucking the life out of people.” That’s a coincidence. Buffy has the same problem with Angel.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>If this is love, why I can’t I fit your whole head in my mouth?</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That seems to be the nature of these all-consuming loves, as it were.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Har har.<br /><br />Next time: Season Two continues with <font color=yellow>“Reptile Boy.”</font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-21188284091508660132008-11-29T08:15:00.000-08:002008-12-21T10:53:45.820-08:00School Hard<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJnkUa8qEhf8x0j-ZWCLz_K1fCjY9pEcDq4x5QQWFQTlhap38VFmiSIr2Jd0ImwJELQwh6xNH46Q7WXzY_VIut7RnvpuYCT0i-NtsAbaFhVkN6lTuVWyaUR6kOS8NNv8c3pCEleYU9nXk/s1600-h/SchoolHard_048.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJnkUa8qEhf8x0j-ZWCLz_K1fCjY9pEcDq4x5QQWFQTlhap38VFmiSIr2Jd0ImwJELQwh6xNH46Q7WXzY_VIut7RnvpuYCT0i-NtsAbaFhVkN6lTuVWyaUR6kOS8NNv8c3pCEleYU9nXk/s320/SchoolHard_048.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274117757454233650" /></a><br /><br /><h3>Season Two, Episode Two</h3><br />11/28/08<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE</font color> comes in from the kitchen with more pie, and says, “Oh, are we starting?” <font color=red>HE</font color> understands that this is Thanksgiving humor, and grants her a courtesy laugh. In this episode, Spike makes his Buffy debut. Nuf sed.<br /><br /><h3>The Slayer’s Soiree</h3><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLHJnkwH7tG2CY2Cbugx737ZbHDXNyXY7LaJu25Bcy9YIMMgbLNHRnsx4u-tOgwWltajYriup0c19X0cQFofa1sVLNRXqYVO9tf54Zw2hleHPb9Voa_aP-xMS9OE489mwWyLeN84ju43I/s1600-h/SchoolHard_018.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLHJnkwH7tG2CY2Cbugx737ZbHDXNyXY7LaJu25Bcy9YIMMgbLNHRnsx4u-tOgwWltajYriup0c19X0cQFofa1sVLNRXqYVO9tf54Zw2hleHPb9Voa_aP-xMS9OE489mwWyLeN84ju43I/s200/SchoolHard_018.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274117284119423954" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What kind of reaching out is this—making juvenile delinquents help?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s a surefire way to insure that the evening is a disaster. Who better to put in charge of parent-teacher night than a student who stabbed a horticulture teacher with pruning shears?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why did guidance put Sheila into horticulture in the first place if she had issues?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can answer that. No doubt guidance doesn’t think horticulture is a <span style="font-style:italic;">real</span> class, and they treat it like a dumping ground for the scum of the school, like they do with art and music. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sheila is the proto-Faith—did you notice? She dresses like a skank, she loves cars, and she’s a brunette. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s right! But I didn’t know Faith loved cars. I thought she loved knives.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think it’s as much the car itself, but what you can do in the car. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Thank you for that clarification.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0AQcjyNWGKsQQ0CUHy11kBzKkDLOgZ-DzmRc2yfChNPZm6RdzxWgzuvjEuBBkqYZxaYtmnVIgK_OmZeISF0aUOVYOapeJTB3FgpVtPjgrCbICJfcuSCVALopnWpw_pVv2sMgHgVQbZHE/s1600-h/thumb_SchoolHard_045.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 149px; height: 112px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0AQcjyNWGKsQQ0CUHy11kBzKkDLOgZ-DzmRc2yfChNPZm6RdzxWgzuvjEuBBkqYZxaYtmnVIgK_OmZeISF0aUOVYOapeJTB3FgpVtPjgrCbICJfcuSCVALopnWpw_pVv2sMgHgVQbZHE/s200/thumb_SchoolHard_045.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274118177989734578" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s with Xander’s gigantic purse? There’s no getting around the fact that <span style="font-style:italic;">that </span>is a purse.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Look at his shirt. I dropped my pie! Wait, I don’t care anymore because here comes Spike!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> We don’t know it at the time, but this is an iconic moment. Spike running over the “Welcome to Sunnydale” sign. <span style="font-style:italic;">Junka junka, junka junka…</span>I forgot about the guitar riffs.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was ecstatic when I saw the Caddy.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_adhzkJ13GNHyDwDtr9_iOs9HcJL1GFfDKUTf1iaIWL5x-JClUjEjd2aJbSggwRS-JC2Y1XIlGEyZ35jWFlL7gqM7Isgj8o2poCcqgMUFRdKr1ZhJ-GcjLmpKVbVo11EFrt3HyS0AXXk/s1600-h/SchoolHard_055.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_adhzkJ13GNHyDwDtr9_iOs9HcJL1GFfDKUTf1iaIWL5x-JClUjEjd2aJbSggwRS-JC2Y1XIlGEyZ35jWFlL7gqM7Isgj8o2poCcqgMUFRdKr1ZhJ-GcjLmpKVbVo11EFrt3HyS0AXXk/s200/SchoolHard_055.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274118817422582466" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dang, he’s already vamped out when he gets out of the car. And his first words in the series?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Home sweet home.”</font color> Are you kidding? Am I going to be the one who documents all of Spike’s firsts? I can admit I have a mancrush on him, but…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was too busy shouting “Yes!”<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Spike and Drusilla</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Spike can kill <span style="font-style:italic;">me</span> for fun.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I guess I deserve this after all my Cordelia comments.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ah, Nancyboy—that’s your insult, sweetie!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love Spike’s comment about the crucifixion. That’s such a perfectly withering jibe to make about wannabes.:<br /><br /><font color=yellow>If every vampire who said he was at the crucifixion was actually there, it would have been like Woodstock.</font color><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRVuTE1wu-GS1X1EzbLuMG2l1fwyw39LRbikjvlAD_4dj52GC4IzRJli0_s3fTDqBbp-bvNMj0HSO6ZODZepUhPaZMM2JKz0YeZYGKdmtUuLAcNFLXekbtH_eyveMSfbgVCGyB2S3Z0Lg/s1600-h/SchoolHard_100.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRVuTE1wu-GS1X1EzbLuMG2l1fwyw39LRbikjvlAD_4dj52GC4IzRJli0_s3fTDqBbp-bvNMj0HSO6ZODZepUhPaZMM2JKz0YeZYGKdmtUuLAcNFLXekbtH_eyveMSfbgVCGyB2S3Z0Lg/s200/SchoolHard_100.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274119564838015330" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We don’t get to see his normal face until Drusilla walks up to him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And yet we know she so seldom has a calming effect on him.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Who am I kidding? I love to brag!”</font color> I love how much fun Spike has doing his job.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He really enjoys his work.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Watch out, Drusilla and the Anointed one are having a creep-out contest. Drusilla’s got that cat-stare-at-nothing look going, so I have to go with her on this one.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like Drusilla’s creepiness more. The Anointed One is a tired thing at this point.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I sincerely believe Joss Whedon felt that, too. There is a sea change in this episode that you can trace throughout, what with the changing of the guard, and the reemphasis on fun, not ritual…<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>No More Disappointments</h3><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOLXdvC_YIWdc_1gxn6srNQsftXp5_oram8ymE19h1KQcDVIdGlc8EW3D06l38pnHjaMVCy7tWJP3_1iE1A1QsDRx_aPHLzlHYoI9wccaEDCLop3oPm5Y7TlHJFkiYNMQhrtoTgTk2a3E/s1600-h/SchoolHard_126.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOLXdvC_YIWdc_1gxn6srNQsftXp5_oram8ymE19h1KQcDVIdGlc8EW3D06l38pnHjaMVCy7tWJP3_1iE1A1QsDRx_aPHLzlHYoI9wccaEDCLop3oPm5Y7TlHJFkiYNMQhrtoTgTk2a3E/s200/SchoolHard_126.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274120047167733362" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Joyce should call the school and get Buffy’s scores if she’s so worried about it. Nowadays you can go online and get them. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, but this was back in the Dark Ages. Besides, it’s sweet to watch her parent.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Right, but again I say, if she was so worried, she could have picked up the phone and called, oh, I don’t know, a <span style="font-style:italic;">teacher!</span><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That wouldn’t have made a very interesting plot point.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Do you like Buffy’s pajamas? They have flowers, watering cans, and shovels on them.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Was that on purpose?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I suppose she wears pajamas every night on purpose.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <span style="font-style:italic;">No!</span> Is that her latent support for horticulture?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What? I blanked out when you said “whore.”<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Night of St. Vigius</h3><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi02ELyvLFts4i6vHaens2H7e6dHhcQZ4pFDsSkdVPqQx9sg0Y8opzaDAfLILTZIrI9tbgu-_pOHizAN8BlezU6avlVioH6wY20FvMsqqbFBH_RMPC2ksUfDawh1T9retfZ3AICWa33gYE/s1600-h/SchoolHard_135.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi02ELyvLFts4i6vHaens2H7e6dHhcQZ4pFDsSkdVPqQx9sg0Y8opzaDAfLILTZIrI9tbgu-_pOHizAN8BlezU6avlVioH6wY20FvMsqqbFBH_RMPC2ksUfDawh1T9retfZ3AICWa33gYE/s200/SchoolHard_135.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274120556837929010" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Spotted it first! Scooby t-shirt on Willow! <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What did it look like?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It was just Scooby. Aren’t you going to tell us the significance of that shirt?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Um, no, I think I’ll let you do it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s one of the things you find out in Buffy trivia. They don’t start talking about themselves as the Scooby gang, but they kind of flow into it. You must be tired or something.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Actually, I was focused on how the order never accurately calculated the Mesopotamian calendar, according to Jenny. <span style="font-weight:bold;">And Miss Calendar should know about calendars,</span><span style="font-style:italic;"> waah wahh.</span><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why is Buffy covering for Sheila? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Because that’s what bad kids do. They cover for each other. Honor among thieves.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> None of what you said applies to reality, my dear.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_fL-YbJmrtoBRpLahdzKyTYGAotwpAFG1onW3au1EFT_nSORscgamAD1fEyS7hiTjMxIA_V1ucor8GnikeM9JPQtnpRxsRHKtXVygE7bbBuDt1N2nX45RTMG4d0WGNM1-SXSbEqWJRSE/s1600-h/1622.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_fL-YbJmrtoBRpLahdzKyTYGAotwpAFG1onW3au1EFT_nSORscgamAD1fEyS7hiTjMxIA_V1ucor8GnikeM9JPQtnpRxsRHKtXVygE7bbBuDt1N2nX45RTMG4d0WGNM1-SXSbEqWJRSE/s200/1622.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274132689748338962" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Well, this show was set in the nineties. It was different back then.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Kinder and gentler, what with the bicycles built for two.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re thinking 1890’s.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <span style="font-weight:bold;">Taffy pulls. Sunday school picnics. The Teapot Dome Scandal.</span><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Okay, you can stop now. And the Teapot Dome Scandal happened in the 1920's, wiseass.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhph2WQh2TRmHom2_uZAjszqWCszQVujyZ8jYrOU2ddQxi8nn9rT-3QxMtadugXZ-QDu2j_-V95tY4z782D5d4phTCOXo2jnvsoXc2RuSPFf-dVvXe86BWbRemSKPCqqsVNKQ5brQ7nab4/s1600-h/nickel.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhph2WQh2TRmHom2_uZAjszqWCszQVujyZ8jYrOU2ddQxi8nn9rT-3QxMtadugXZ-QDu2j_-V95tY4z782D5d4phTCOXo2jnvsoXc2RuSPFf-dVvXe86BWbRemSKPCqqsVNKQ5brQ7nab4/s200/nickel.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274121553167886818" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey, there’s new music at the Bronze.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Can’t believe they take homework to the Bronze.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That lead singer wears glasses.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He looks like an engineering student. What was the name of the group?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Nickel, I believe. Their poster was conveniently posted behind the band as they were performing. Joss likes to do that. He likes to plug the band on a poster, or a sticker in a locker, or something like that during the show itself.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander is wearing a shirt that does not suck in this scene.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I wondered about that. Then I thought it may have been a trick of lighting.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You are as correct as you are beautiful. We should assume that his shirt sucked as always, and that any non-suckage was an optical illusion.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, that’s best.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Vampire’s Prophecy</h3><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieLeXdQTWAuKU3-COr2psk-mSdhZZ9H1wqliIWeNoOMM8PIjtA0lXwVWVsxZ095GYreyFnf1AUQhIf8P4MGJtACnJmCZ2gvCMtIauP9mPMxaF-av7SV_3fud9eCelEighp3AH8GGeKTEs/s1600-h/SchoolHard_193.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieLeXdQTWAuKU3-COr2psk-mSdhZZ9H1wqliIWeNoOMM8PIjtA0lXwVWVsxZ095GYreyFnf1AUQhIf8P4MGJtACnJmCZ2gvCMtIauP9mPMxaF-av7SV_3fud9eCelEighp3AH8GGeKTEs/s200/SchoolHard_193.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274123053440811906" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Spike’s first visit to the Bronze occurs here.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And I wonder if the menu has the Bloomin’ Onion yet.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s downright mean to talk about The Outback during the show.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I enjoy how Spike watches and scouts before he tangles with somebody.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s really very intelligent of him. Why does Buffy just let him walk off?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Beats me. Miles to go and promises to keep, I guess.<br /><br /><font color=yellow>SHEILA: [notices her two companions are missing] What happened to them? <br />SPIKE: They got sleepy.</font color><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Lookie here! Angel knows Spike! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Intrigue! But I’m only fake-intrigued by this development, because I already know how Angel knows Spike.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> We <span style="font-style:italic;">all</span> know how Angel knows Spike.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What I don’t understand is how unhelpful Angel is for someone who was called by the Powers That Be to help.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Thank you for that. <span style="font-weight:bold;">It’s like Angel got the cosmic equivalent of jury duty being sent to this Hellmouth, and he’s only going to do what he absolutely has to, nothing more.</span><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He really is mailing it in.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you notice the bit about the nature of the Hellmouth and how it perks up the vampires? It’s like a spa, like Baden Baden or something.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s convenient to have all those teenagers on the Hellmouth.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like <font color=yellow>“Happy Meals with legs,”</font color> as Spike would say.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Preparations</h3><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkewR7iBwsgE7O9zUFgHnsr81dvGeWCRFp_2zkEiHEVzGBtar9lbjug8b_h8i5yHmXFbqqTAOiEZmEZJmHMo8My2PEBO-s374dnYwaAKUXwAfU4Fi2mDwVQpIuTZNIugIGrX1FqbB-q4o/s1600-h/SchoolHard_240.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkewR7iBwsgE7O9zUFgHnsr81dvGeWCRFp_2zkEiHEVzGBtar9lbjug8b_h8i5yHmXFbqqTAOiEZmEZJmHMo8My2PEBO-s374dnYwaAKUXwAfU4Fi2mDwVQpIuTZNIugIGrX1FqbB-q4o/s200/SchoolHard_240.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274123830523144498" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Jenny with her hair up isn’t nearly as hot. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I am loving Miss Calendar’s updo. I think she looks fabulous.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sarah Palin kind of ruined the updo for me.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, but you must watch the show in the context of the time.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dang, that was a very historical criticism-like thing for you to say.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I <span style="font-style:italic;">do</span> love to criticize.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-aGrTTRCptIU-evySyxQQ-rn-EmxloH2zSRI_0xPpa9RUklWNMYiJqNCoo2IGvKcEZLWwtnhm2O8fAng0fr4_pl705T2nN60JAT2ENvG8EfMg4SFwQr1MfS9vCJwgQSzdriDqQqXru-M/s1600-h/SchoolHard_294.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-aGrTTRCptIU-evySyxQQ-rn-EmxloH2zSRI_0xPpa9RUklWNMYiJqNCoo2IGvKcEZLWwtnhm2O8fAng0fr4_pl705T2nN60JAT2ENvG8EfMg4SFwQr1MfS9vCJwgQSzdriDqQqXru-M/s200/SchoolHard_294.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274124205042789362" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a neat outfit Cordelia’s wearing. Very Eastern.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love how she’s there to insult, even when things are very bad.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She will insult you through thick and thin, through good times and bad. She’s always there for you…with an insult. She says she’s going to get her legs waxed…think she does it <span style="font-style:italic;">anywhere else</span>?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This is <span style="font-style:italic;">Buffy the Vampire Slayer</span>, not <span style="font-style:italic;">Sex in the City</span>.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, but do you think she does? Okay, what’s with the facial expression? <br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Parent-Teacher Night</h3><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW1EeOeqotdFZz0__f5bcoOZWPsVQvzx7X6tuGPh7xSRBomaTSNtOcbNgN8tWe0qtfJ6CYGLExu4LIdL1RR8OENt1DD3BioW_NAHXTx3AG7oNtHq4gmRQS6yXtOVRNhWFJbD3sAr5TA-E/s1600-h/SchoolHard_332.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW1EeOeqotdFZz0__f5bcoOZWPsVQvzx7X6tuGPh7xSRBomaTSNtOcbNgN8tWe0qtfJ6CYGLExu4LIdL1RR8OENt1DD3BioW_NAHXTx3AG7oNtHq4gmRQS6yXtOVRNhWFJbD3sAr5TA-E/s200/SchoolHard_332.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274124872016215506" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Their parent-teacher night looks about as well-attended as ours.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There’s what, seven people there?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> More if you count the vampires. But they probably didn’t sign up for times.<br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>William the Bloody</h3><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUHYtP2a0HFndJAII4Smf5o6-IZYYIWjuc7FSrGbEn97wYr7ZpVmf1InKxoEq5T9-DedWlRx2x8YtSIdf0Js13jKujsFJrUKz95sIYTB_Vuoxn1_nPHyg778Mqn6q9cz2zZevd8OI1cSY/s1600-h/Golden-Spike-wiki.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 136px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUHYtP2a0HFndJAII4Smf5o6-IZYYIWjuc7FSrGbEn97wYr7ZpVmf1InKxoEq5T9-DedWlRx2x8YtSIdf0Js13jKujsFJrUKz95sIYTB_Vuoxn1_nPHyg778Mqn6q9cz2zZevd8OI1cSY/s200/Golden-Spike-wiki.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274125755480214722" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> William the Bloody was known for torturing his victims with railroad spikes. What do you make of that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Lots of misinformation in this episode. I don’t think the railroad spikes ever get mentioned again.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It makes me think of Promontory Point, Utah, and the Transcontinental railroad.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It makes me think of my trip to Chicago last summer on the train.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Because you traveled on a spike?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Because you mentioned <span style="font-style:italic;">trains</span>. This is a great episode, and we’re stuck on railroad spikes.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Spike may be only 200, but he’s 2-0 vs. slayers. That’s a record you can’t argue with.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But Giles doesn’t tell her this before she faces him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why, is that kind of thing important? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s probably best she doesn’t know.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Party Crashers</h3><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9WHxnWCaGyntOKGvi773884L-V3eOt6sXKXa1utIFKKmz_d4alGw2uEzknKXMYZcZ5MWgLQIVWevJZqX2UbBzqQFIhrRgrah-XECmDOQIPaoPZ3ym5dDNoWFDtynObC6XDz6bMwQbhpk/s1600-h/SchoolHard_370.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9WHxnWCaGyntOKGvi773884L-V3eOt6sXKXa1utIFKKmz_d4alGw2uEzknKXMYZcZ5MWgLQIVWevJZqX2UbBzqQFIhrRgrah-XECmDOQIPaoPZ3ym5dDNoWFDtynObC6XDz6bMwQbhpk/s200/SchoolHard_370.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274126773761717122" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander does a lot of non-comprehending what he’s supposed to do, although his shirt could probably be a first good attack.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> To daze and distract the opponent? Or just reduce their morale to a shambling heap?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <span style="font-weight:bold;">I think it’s hard to fight when you’re barfing.</span><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The vampire Spike’s talking to looks like he has jaundice. Many vampires have this affliction, I’ve noticed, but not our favorite ones. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think it’s all in their diet. The stronger they are, the better pickings they have regularly. You know there’s got to be weakling vampires out there who can barely kill mice.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh no! They’ve cut the phones…no one can arrange a salon appointment to fix Jenny’s hair!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think Jenny’s hair is perfectly fine.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, you’re wrong.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Says the man who wants to cut his own hair at every opportunity.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <span style="font-weight:bold;"> Ain’t no beautician gonna tell me how to do me!</span><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You got that from a movie.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, okay. Sort of. <span style="font-style:italic;">Drumline.</span> I stand by my statement.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Buffy Takes Over</h3><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGxNS72IgtGlEzQUOcTjZKzgOvWoAHA1rIUDwvvQs5LSpKuxMLSeii-nuBD_BCyGe7mDtO82EPTOb5CT8-YUTkmEV6-qnZMdKS-taZOTnN3QFuty1zvxdC7cA6yGogY2vhMT-3a1Mghac/s1600-h/SchoolHard_457.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGxNS72IgtGlEzQUOcTjZKzgOvWoAHA1rIUDwvvQs5LSpKuxMLSeii-nuBD_BCyGe7mDtO82EPTOb5CT8-YUTkmEV6-qnZMdKS-taZOTnN3QFuty1zvxdC7cA6yGogY2vhMT-3a1Mghac/s200/SchoolHard_457.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274127887467882914" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This was a very tense sequence. I was nervous, and I had seen it before.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Where the hell is Angel? You’d think he’d show up to face his old nemesis.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Slacking off. I have to ask—do they still have axes in cabinets at school?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No. I think I speak for many education professionals when I say I’d rather see the building burn down than see a teenager with an axe.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>False Allies</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Does this count as another sneak-up on Buffy?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, because in order to count, Buffy <span style="font-style:italic;">1) cannot know that the sneaker was there, and 2) she has to jump or otherwise express surprise once the sneak-up has concluded.</span> Neither of these conditions have been met.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She did seem surprised that Sheila had become a vampire.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiicvKSRH8963HBp-4aHkvCzkDd-0BmMMhu-9ckbKS8JKLzt9LtxrUqmRQkOMD-TQ_DmMZRaGapIK__CHu1te0JvQYUnRPc_1jkwF8fK-dDnGssGosLJyHOEl3kkh4vulMWMG1L2Ndd4ao/s1600-h/SchoolHard_467.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiicvKSRH8963HBp-4aHkvCzkDd-0BmMMhu-9ckbKS8JKLzt9LtxrUqmRQkOMD-TQ_DmMZRaGapIK__CHu1te0JvQYUnRPc_1jkwF8fK-dDnGssGosLJyHOEl3kkh4vulMWMG1L2Ndd4ao/s200/SchoolHard_467.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274128268710383538" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander as bait! I love it! Don’t really know what purpose it served, but I love it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Usually Xander’s giving it to Angel. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Seriously, what was the point of all that? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Angel was trying to make Spike think he was still Angelus. Thus giving Angel the excuse to walk around with Xander in a headlock.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like how Angel didn’t bother to fill Xander in on the plan. <font color=yellow>“Undead liar guy,”</font color> he says. What a doof. So Spike doesn’t know Angel has a soul. I thought he knew.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh, he knew. In that scene Spike knew.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Alright, then my point is this: How could Angel <span style="font-style:italic;">not know</span> that Spike knew already?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Uh…lack of working at it, like everything else? Like I said, just an excuse to put Xander in a headlock.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Who says Angel doesn’t have fun?<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Face Off</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Spike calls Angel an “Uncle Tom.” Dang, that’s quite an insult.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Of course, young viewers today wouldn’t get that reference. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sadly, you’re correct.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipXjv56mIpniMFGwabYFy7i9aT7DxnUO6lwRc9TZUTh9aenLVE3Q0z1JPj3e3dyjiEEjz_1xhvUY8PA70iMwjAsWoYjR7huTgqZsNZa-HPt4mjHtf_sZNzPWX2NwjWRgIHHG5nCzdAyyA/s1600-h/SchoolHard_504.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipXjv56mIpniMFGwabYFy7i9aT7DxnUO6lwRc9TZUTh9aenLVE3Q0z1JPj3e3dyjiEEjz_1xhvUY8PA70iMwjAsWoYjR7huTgqZsNZa-HPt4mjHtf_sZNzPWX2NwjWRgIHHG5nCzdAyyA/s200/SchoolHard_504.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274129724260557506" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s another first! The first Buffy-Spike fight! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I sense tension between Spike and Buffy.<br />Let’s focus on the fight, turbo. How would you score it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy won.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No way! I’d say it was a draw…although I’d have to say that Spike was ahead on points when Joyce broke up the match. <br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQuyijyioVMYsF8mlto-sd01v5xQ4-owaxjs8m2tHC03RBcMwTrCmnQI4VFC_e0l3ljxVEB5xVpwdb2U-bSthqESq2I06PTjmSlYycGnh9mB4yyCqZLtmFJu2t1j6N3xEjQlzF8LDB2PQ/s1600-h/buffy+fights"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQuyijyioVMYsF8mlto-sd01v5xQ4-owaxjs8m2tHC03RBcMwTrCmnQI4VFC_e0l3ljxVEB5xVpwdb2U-bSthqESq2I06PTjmSlYycGnh9mB4yyCqZLtmFJu2t1j6N3xEjQlzF8LDB2PQ/s200/buffy+fights" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274130283447458274" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What an ending to a fight scene.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, the mother of one of the combatants interferes and stops the match. I think I saw this on<span style="font-style:italic;"> WWE Raw</span> once. I’m going to declare that Spike is 0-0-1 v. Buffy.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Little More Fun</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Snyder knows about vampires. Now we know he’s evil.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Worst. Conspiracy. Ever. It’s interesting how early in the series, Whedon has everyone still somewhat oblivious to all these supernatural goings-on, and then later it just becomes one of those extremely poorly-kept secrets that everyone already knows about.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like how Spike calls that kid “the Annoying One.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The book on the annoying kid has been closed, <span style="font-style:italic;">mirabile dictu.</span> That was truly awesome. No wonder Spike wasn’t killed off, as he was originally supposed to have been.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Bravo. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The feast was ruined by Spike’s impatience! A trend is born.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We could put a scoreboard up for that one, too. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Spike Gets Impatient”? You may have something there.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif4yb34HywrOkmugjCSTG3zSZMj3BolnvrZs7zSKnipnIguXwvnyuFyVi166XnvcXc7kQ6wzyX3lVML76LFBzq-e5tOUgda49UXEk-dUpSnn85c9xpn4HVwNTXHyVV6_vnZaAb31tXCzk/s1600-h/SchoolHard_588.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif4yb34HywrOkmugjCSTG3zSZMj3BolnvrZs7zSKnipnIguXwvnyuFyVi166XnvcXc7kQ6wzyX3lVML76LFBzq-e5tOUgda49UXEk-dUpSnn85c9xpn4HVwNTXHyVV6_vnZaAb31tXCzk/s200/SchoolHard_588.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5274130956019497714" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Let’s see what’s on TV.”</font color> After all the tumult, this is a great ending line.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Very anti-climactic. I bet they watched “Passions.” <br /><br />Next time on Hellmouth Follies: <font color=yellow><a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/12/inca-mummy-girl.html">“Inca Mummy Girl.”</a></font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-41100751940071395602008-11-23T14:47:00.001-08:002008-11-29T09:49:51.506-08:00Some Assembly Required<h3>Season Two, Episode Two</h3><br />11/22/08<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHcoiauSzGi3RoU098cao6-E2J-DKFbZoph7gY5XKq0vgjreYVmiIhguk_6N4o1zDDDpVagzjAm6rcZj_VqXJCrswv2VCS069q1T4hISU6BYQukKsUUIevp8X3j2-2uS4L8pww85wDc2Y/s1600-h/the+brain+that+wouldnt+die.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 212px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHcoiauSzGi3RoU098cao6-E2J-DKFbZoph7gY5XKq0vgjreYVmiIhguk_6N4o1zDDDpVagzjAm6rcZj_VqXJCrswv2VCS069q1T4hISU6BYQukKsUUIevp8X3j2-2uS4L8pww85wDc2Y/s320/the+brain+that+wouldnt+die.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271991675193272914" /></a><br />Happy Thanksgiving, Hellmouthers! <font color=purple>SHE</font color> is excited about all the pie coming around the bend while <font color=red>HE</font color> is thrilled at the prospect of not being around teenagers for four straight days. In this episode, we learn about how to pick up a techno-pagan, the multifarious uses for a cake pan, and the dread implications of “doing the wacky.”<br /><br /><h3>On the Hunt</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> 3, 2, 1…everyone can sneak up on Buffy! <em>I</em> haven’t snuck up on Buffy yet, but we still have five seasons to go.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This is the first time Angel gets the drop on Buffy. He’s been notoriously unable to do that. Everybody <em>else</em> has.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s true.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOFGSj2GxYr4P-sFqnEs8OHNNW7v-eSfNCGHdpg9aARuiFFb7YWXVvU2zLha2fyvCELPYeXX2aWhWs0YaP-DN85Rek2GD7WuEvFZwbJ0QuuvQhlLd1l5hYQMP2L7iPRCwkQgliZm8-eyg/s1600-h/sar+1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 160px; height: 120px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOFGSj2GxYr4P-sFqnEs8OHNNW7v-eSfNCGHdpg9aARuiFFb7YWXVvU2zLha2fyvCELPYeXX2aWhWs0YaP-DN85Rek2GD7WuEvFZwbJ0QuuvQhlLd1l5hYQMP2L7iPRCwkQgliZm8-eyg/s320/sar+1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271994663859781746" /></a><br /><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cool with the shovel.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Question. How did that shovel get dusted? Did the shovel belong to him?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t notice that. The same reason their clothes get dusted? There’s obviously some combustion going on and the other stuff gets burned up really fast.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But not jewelry. At least, not all the time. Only when the plot calls for it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Whedon’s universe is selective and unpredictable.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like when Angel says, <font color=yellow> “Whenever we fight, you always bring up the vampire thing.”</font color> It’s like it’s no big deal, really. It’s just a bias Buffy needs to get over already.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like he’s Mexican or something. Maybe he really does think their differences are superficial.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You can’t be serious.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He can’t exactly be sane anymore. He’s 241 years old. He’s obviously lost perspective.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Grave Robbing</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhck41qidqPW5pCF2KZjZQIHOLn9M3zijw352CIBdFrzMgNf2MLeYO0pEIVrb_JR09WQODO13RyBRIA7Bn29Q7sUbr-K2FbJMeXB8FXX_BbtUuvp2jc8Y6_WbI9w4M5fFklR57iFHAj9PA/s1600-h/sar+2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhck41qidqPW5pCF2KZjZQIHOLn9M3zijw352CIBdFrzMgNf2MLeYO0pEIVrb_JR09WQODO13RyBRIA7Bn29Q7sUbr-K2FbJMeXB8FXX_BbtUuvp2jc8Y6_WbI9w4M5fFklR57iFHAj9PA/s200/sar+2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271997079111215506" /></a><<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles practicing on his pickup lines…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> With his back to the door. That never will end well.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I happen to like the word <em>indecorous</em>. I don’t see the problem.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You never use the word <em>indecorous</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think it’s highly indecorous for you to suggest I never use the word <em>indecorous</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re not being amenable.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Amenable to what?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Your…indecoriety? Is that a word?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It is now.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Librarian…that embarrassing fact.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t know we were embarrassed by librarians.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Are you embarrassed to be a librarian?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> ‘Cause I think it’s really <em>hot</em>. All those books and that shushing. <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHtB9gklR3FgF3miIggfggfHsXTEJpCtTZGjSa49TQNj9WofKrngRP39TOZT5Sox4STey8ijs49U9cKuBhVrecrQhdv20rmTpIXUb8NYhWW21jrMIzxFgMDEjXnyJqeAlbYXUmhzW4Rjw/s1600-h/Horshack.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 155px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHtB9gklR3FgF3miIggfggfHsXTEJpCtTZGjSa49TQNj9WofKrngRP39TOZT5Sox4STey8ijs49U9cKuBhVrecrQhdv20rmTpIXUb8NYhWW21jrMIzxFgMDEjXnyJqeAlbYXUmhzW4Rjw/s200/Horshack.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271995192674363506" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Mr. Korshak was the name of the vampire? <em>Oh! oh oh oh oh, Mr. Kotter!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not Horshack. <em>Korshak</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Daryl</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Love makes you do the wacky.”</font color><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did that pearl strike you as a little bit forced?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No. Seems like something a teenager would say.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No teenager <em>I</em> know.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Well, you see them all day every day. It makes sense in TV world.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“No one should have to do anything educational in school if they don’t want to.”</font color> Now <em>that</em> sounds like something I would hear.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I wonder what she was going to do to prove a tomato was a fruit or a vegetable.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What would you do? It’s not like they could go on Wikipedia.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It wasn’t invented yet. This episode made me feel old. Eric snaps the photos. He develops the photos. He <em>hangs up</em> the photos.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh my god! You just made me feel old, too! Thanks a lot! Of course, I didn’t really get into photography until after the digital age anyway.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I know how to use a 35mm.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The fact that you know how to use a 35mm is probably the equivalent of running a nuclear sub in today’s techno-world.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7vU34wpyyBXwSyvz7sMc9mx974lV9UfB-A8zeQI84BdiIBOSFv-9fynHqj9Evw4CPbaz8C7GZasKf4M8NY4OKYPIiUNheosy4MmfPFjMyqy3FCxqFBnrb9DlZrQpfN5eDwnbAzfn1W3w/s1600-h/sar+3.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7vU34wpyyBXwSyvz7sMc9mx974lV9UfB-A8zeQI84BdiIBOSFv-9fynHqj9Evw4CPbaz8C7GZasKf4M8NY4OKYPIiUNheosy4MmfPFjMyqy3FCxqFBnrb9DlZrQpfN5eDwnbAzfn1W3w/s200/sar+3.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271997078288949618" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s with <font color=yellow>“yearbook nerds don’t come out of hibernation until spring”</font color>? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Apparently they only work on their yearbook in the spring.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> As a yearbook faculty adviser, I take exception to this portrayal of yearbook people. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Well, librarians are “embarrassing,” so I’m not going to back you up there.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA-7yMDlILFOnjJEeGrkrVAXJCQMYbUnhKGP_HL-tPepIo1fJPwbAXBG9LI4W5U54HL_1dsVxQXTRrHvnR1uDQ1tUuhavMH_ZIRoDmOwPCD0zhUajE_oElfFJkid3YIjtUtSvRH7BBNW4/s1600-h/sar+4.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA-7yMDlILFOnjJEeGrkrVAXJCQMYbUnhKGP_HL-tPepIo1fJPwbAXBG9LI4W5U54HL_1dsVxQXTRrHvnR1uDQ1tUuhavMH_ZIRoDmOwPCD0zhUajE_oElfFJkid3YIjtUtSvRH7BBNW4/s200/sar+4.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271999040831878402" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why doesn’t <em>Buffy</em> dig the hole? She could have had the whole thing dug by now.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought it was funny. <font color=yellow>“I’m an old-fashioned gal. I was raised to believe that men dig up the corpses and women have the babies.”</font color> I also love the fact that no one ever patrols the cemetery. <strong>You see cars go by, but no one stops to say, “Hey, stop shoveling.”</strong><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think too much of Sunnydale civic pride.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, they’re rather jaded.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Cheerleader Fear</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dang, Cordelia. What does she do here--drop the keys, then kick them under the car?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I recognized Angel’s shoes. Is that bad?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t know how to interpret that. But seriously, what kind of idiot kicks the keys under the car?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This is why she makes good bait. She’s the catalyst for action in every episode.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfyZKZef4RavNj92O4sIgfeQzkr9nfm3Bhyphenhyphen1HZfEVrcHohePwhVR_X1cjpXrXwkBH4V8FEaUiBkX6MKSkx2P9ew5yo9WayeF_4hMRohlmaOArPPX9LxNiv10u0E40u8dgD5z8UqnI0vdc/s1600-h/sar+5.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfyZKZef4RavNj92O4sIgfeQzkr9nfm3Bhyphenhyphen1HZfEVrcHohePwhVR_X1cjpXrXwkBH4V8FEaUiBkX6MKSkx2P9ew5yo9WayeF_4hMRohlmaOArPPX9LxNiv10u0E40u8dgD5z8UqnI0vdc/s200/sar+5.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5271999971765454098" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When Cordelia climbs out of the dumpster, at least she didn’t say, “Give me a <em>hand</em>, would ya?” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That would have seemed a little bit cutesy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I would have said it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Of course you would have.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmLq925zJ-T3q5agY9Y3XGKwnCeRm0p7wm0OmWfjx75BsTJ_m9ttC_MOlXAX4AtjeVXUOnFvPRLui2SOERlPgDv37GWWs6EaXT3h99dXh0LU8o2Etrq_FSCvnVmPZfwKEmLpEXS1PEePo/s1600-h/sar+6.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmLq925zJ-T3q5agY9Y3XGKwnCeRm0p7wm0OmWfjx75BsTJ_m9ttC_MOlXAX4AtjeVXUOnFvPRLui2SOERlPgDv37GWWs6EaXT3h99dXh0LU8o2Etrq_FSCvnVmPZfwKEmLpEXS1PEePo/s200/sar+6.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272000634392559778" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hee hee. <font color=yellow>“Why are terrible things always happening to me?”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> As she lays her head on Angel’s shoulder. Poor Cordelia!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordy looked back to see if Xander was watching. Did you notice that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No, I did not. Interesting.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Perfect Girl</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjonmgvgSmumOGwuQXlJqQbjDbruOsIIssrPozzlXYNBNu33u4SYVy4YC9cVrGQPuPZSn4XOuJcXW2uzBZMJCTJBAw_mo581VyR9mcHuLcFwb2ooh4qdfkzl-gwovyztK8qWc8dbbemTr4/s1600-h/sar+7.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 100px; height: 100px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjonmgvgSmumOGwuQXlJqQbjDbruOsIIssrPozzlXYNBNu33u4SYVy4YC9cVrGQPuPZSn4XOuJcXW2uzBZMJCTJBAw_mo581VyR9mcHuLcFwb2ooh4qdfkzl-gwovyztK8qWc8dbbemTr4/s200/sar+7.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272001649605351666" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was intrigued by the idea of techno-pagan pick-up lines.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do you have any?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why, yes, I do. For instance, “Your body makes me press alt-control-delete.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re nutty.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Is that an Orb of Thessala in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Waah waah waah. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>“If I told you that you had a lot of RAM, would you let me wave my <em>magic bone</em> over it?”</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh, God. Can we move on?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a nice outfit Jenny’s wearing.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyQ2jL4qCOSuLPnEgmQHbY_xkuheF9dDpCqp-hqTIZqv1PucMiXI3gk3OFbK5P76Nrb0jOKp7J9_duNZEBmqgrqpXLPSl-uyGneh8q16RBcuqF5oHfQqL1Pjw7HxehIg94tzs4A7cuL5Q/s1600-h/sar+8.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyQ2jL4qCOSuLPnEgmQHbY_xkuheF9dDpCqp-hqTIZqv1PucMiXI3gk3OFbK5P76Nrb0jOKp7J9_duNZEBmqgrqpXLPSl-uyGneh8q16RBcuqF5oHfQqL1Pjw7HxehIg94tzs4A7cuL5Q/s200/sar+8.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272002271094089218" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sweet! Giles got a date!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Jenny loves the football! Whatever it is you want to tell me, you can tell me over <em>sex!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That conversation did not happen. These are responsible adults.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles may be a responsible adult, but I think Jenny is kind of wild.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They’re very compatible in the fact that they’re completely opposite.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I mean, come on. Pagan plus piercings plus gypsy plus attracted to football…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Equals what?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Can’t you see my eyebrows going up and down? The universal sign of <em>wicka wicka waah?</em><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Getting a Head</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMCaL_ryoolddIgaPhPI5LQvbvEhcD3uVKYoNl7Zsqd-oR5rits0GeQknC4CIU5oXZAEIB1cwTzV7R02c7oJl3VmrLYQ3aNCIs4A1Ro61VI_enAkbM7qN0ySdraoTQKazXkE3KG49h-NI/s1600-h/sar+9.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMCaL_ryoolddIgaPhPI5LQvbvEhcD3uVKYoNl7Zsqd-oR5rits0GeQknC4CIU5oXZAEIB1cwTzV7R02c7oJl3VmrLYQ3aNCIs4A1Ro61VI_enAkbM7qN0ySdraoTQKazXkE3KG49h-NI/s200/sar+9.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272002838607418530" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Come on, someone pay attention to Xander and his skull jokes already! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> All he does in this episode is make jokes.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I feel bad for him. And that never happens.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think they should have used Buffy’s head.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, it would have looked strange on that body. Too small.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like one of your Photoshop attempts?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay, that’s just mean.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I got a little freaked out when Eric used the phrase, “the whole package.” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m hoping that these girls don’t have packages, otherwise Eric and Chris are creepier than I thought.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Eww!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Thank you very much. I’ll be here all week!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Chris’s Promise</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgf32Yqnn5Tkf2bp0naTgwFxWcHmCAwKewzwiqjUw14hA6XQf3Cla5wWkO0pix_4Yq5chtCnkp3UW2KHYauxGFPfphc1PjEw6cbwmEh-3S_7sa_oLHF9k7Qtmfwk0hlxVzSDogSNVDF2UA/s1600-h/sar+10.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgf32Yqnn5Tkf2bp0naTgwFxWcHmCAwKewzwiqjUw14hA6XQf3Cla5wWkO0pix_4Yq5chtCnkp3UW2KHYauxGFPfphc1PjEw6cbwmEh-3S_7sa_oLHF9k7Qtmfwk0hlxVzSDogSNVDF2UA/s200/sar+10.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272004113374146914" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why is it that the Bud Bundy look-a-like is more evil?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think it’s the velvet pullover he’s wearing.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That makes him evil?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Evil for <em>wearing</em> it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think Daryl’s issue is who stitched him up. He looks terrible. Slap some foundation on him, get that metal out of him, and send him to some speed dating.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Give him a break. He smells really bad, I’m sure.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSo_153yFxdevjNG73KXmpqBMmJ87GEfGtYrk4wqYju3UKUlnroV_RDkM_UymJaa6C1pArdPmNfEgmAqZoybWKwWtX8gmcdVn6z2vbfPSYTGrwo4ymzEO-EoM1BXFWQPBZMj9yojryk5k/s1600-h/spa_sm.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 191px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSo_153yFxdevjNG73KXmpqBMmJ87GEfGtYrk4wqYju3UKUlnroV_RDkM_UymJaa6C1pArdPmNfEgmAqZoybWKwWtX8gmcdVn6z2vbfPSYTGrwo4ymzEO-EoM1BXFWQPBZMj9yojryk5k/s200/spa_sm.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272004368624335394" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He needs a complete <em>Beauty Control</em> consultation. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t believe you just plugged them on our blog.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He could go to <a href="http://www.beautypage.net/rosegsell">my beauty page </a>and order online.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Stop it!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><font color=yellow>Musical Interlude:<br />Rob Zombie's "Superbeast"</font color><br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ex2t1OkMgxQ&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ex2t1OkMgxQ&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Looking for Chris</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA-KLht1DXHfh7oxXESN1cC_sOe4ses42maFcj15uApA26NZ4qcY8qMsCRrdxT7590BeoHrM8icJSIAKNjsMrecz6KgGDCl3ftOZhp5e2I231Sjcgn9qsuCiNloHJlMQN6iqDLipdGIdc/s1600-h/sar+11.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA-KLht1DXHfh7oxXESN1cC_sOe4ses42maFcj15uApA26NZ4qcY8qMsCRrdxT7590BeoHrM8icJSIAKNjsMrecz6KgGDCl3ftOZhp5e2I231Sjcgn9qsuCiNloHJlMQN6iqDLipdGIdc/s200/sar+11.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272006369751544226" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> The mother is creepy. She reminds me of that one cartoon lady with all the cats. Like on an old person’s coffee mug.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The one in the housecoat that’s always smoking? <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah! That’s the one. She totally freaks me out on a very visceral level. I can’t explain it.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Chris and Buffy. Would that have counted as a sneak-up? I can’t believe a <em>zombie</em> almost got the drop on her.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’d think she would have smelled him or something.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Chosen One</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordelia shouldn’t be in the locker room. Locker room=death.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> For all the times she’s been in the locker room, <strong>I have been greatly disappointed by the lack of brassiere shots.</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She was putting on lipstick.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I suppose that’ll have to do. I never get what I want.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJrBOa-_OOGVq-EZyqBHb036A-2HG68HNqAWpVbkQ5eriQiGohobw7A9uZBEr2djBTVmr0tkUMj9YFpp978_mXMMwSuOM2l_xUVq8akmwD1Hh_EyMmavx69duL88BKOpCNPy3hgAj68WM/s1600-h/sar+12.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJrBOa-_OOGVq-EZyqBHb036A-2HG68HNqAWpVbkQ5eriQiGohobw7A9uZBEr2djBTVmr0tkUMj9YFpp978_mXMMwSuOM2l_xUVq8akmwD1Hh_EyMmavx69duL88BKOpCNPy3hgAj68WM/s200/sar+12.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272006887728411138" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Great kick Buffy gives Eric.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How exactly did Eric survive that kick? She must have held back.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Didn’t she get him in the <em>head?</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Anyway, Buffy saves Cordelia. Everything back to normal. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Whoa…Cordelia’s the apex. She’s not a fatty, but why is she on top? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Must you ask?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Bear with me. The tiny ones go on top. Everybody knows that.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Daryl’s Desire</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Daryl’s got <em>post-mortem</em> rage.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Everyone once loved him, and now he’s all alone.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Check that. Daryl’s got <em>post-mortem</em> depression.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> His head looks like a football. If your head looked like a stitched-up football, you’d be a mess, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wonder if Joss did that on purpose.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Unadorned aggression,” says Jenny. This is what I’m talking about. <em>Oh yeah</em>, she gets around.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t think she gets around. I think she just <em>understands</em> the aggression.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s a wild child. I’m telling you.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSuwRsER8IXcaqBHIn64JarBFPQNDVmvJtVC6cQr0YnPsIczf21nFQHiNVWG6pKX9y6qDC-2V4-hMYzKuxnr3wQLTCHDL2xZugiN4_gae3RC-gTZz4QDYr2VF-cKuewaiUDRMB02Iatio/s1600-h/sar+13.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSuwRsER8IXcaqBHIn64JarBFPQNDVmvJtVC6cQr0YnPsIczf21nFQHiNVWG6pKX9y6qDC-2V4-hMYzKuxnr3wQLTCHDL2xZugiN4_gae3RC-gTZz4QDYr2VF-cKuewaiUDRMB02Iatio/s200/sar+13.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272007970525070178" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dang, Giles bought a <em>ton</em> of shit. He can’t even carry it all.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He has no arms to make out with.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Then Willow and Xander show up. You know there’s a phrase for that—<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Don’t say it.<br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGQBHFOlmHJzXlxRTUjYEqQe51Gla2dSugl9L8LAJh_fX0tt_PiUle02z_v7pv_kVCJ-3XZrvMWP0GZ_Zi7qWGOTHunEfzVDRWTSo8YnLB6aVC52g35FU5aP4t6oMQfFM2uUp4I9whYDE/s1600-h/sar+14.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGQBHFOlmHJzXlxRTUjYEqQe51Gla2dSugl9L8LAJh_fX0tt_PiUle02z_v7pv_kVCJ-3XZrvMWP0GZ_Zi7qWGOTHunEfzVDRWTSo8YnLB6aVC52g35FU5aP4t6oMQfFM2uUp4I9whYDE/s200/sar+14.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272008835110967250" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> For a second there I thought we were going to have an upskirt of Cordy. Got excited.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You got excited?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Then it turns out she’s just going to the Gatorade hidden underneath the bleachers. Why would you put the Gatorade <em>underneath</em> the bleachers? It makes no sense.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It makes kidnapping the cheerleaders easier. A-duh!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Brawling</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-bGR7m-8IXp65i_JHMmnGYjdJTxRr3h5nqTh4U1DZ8qCeN7VIZqL35SsFYSGSaGYNA5a1x_i3U31xwDiSRe0c0vhSvi8fh_mZA3pXxBipz-nXzJMl5lm2kiImxuJEZtpSfZNroFgKSs4/s1600-h/sar+16.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-bGR7m-8IXp65i_JHMmnGYjdJTxRr3h5nqTh4U1DZ8qCeN7VIZqL35SsFYSGSaGYNA5a1x_i3U31xwDiSRe0c0vhSvi8fh_mZA3pXxBipz-nXzJMl5lm2kiImxuJEZtpSfZNroFgKSs4/s200/sar+16.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272010323212979010" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey Eric, not the most efficient way to disconnect a head! Use the <em>bonesaw</em>, for Pete’s sake!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What was with the <em>cake pan?</em> What were they going to do with the cake pan? It made me think of that movie from the ‘50s where the husband kept the wife’s head alive, and her head sat in a cake pan. Do you know the one I’m thinking of?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>The Thing That Wouldn’t Die.</em> Of course I remember it! An <a href="http://www.mst3k.com/"><em>MST3K</em></a> classic!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZZq92p8us0QR3oZqFLz9w5prm-y1pp8Y5MZnayK13AAQuLYdxirzMayb4-zeHGTb7MW3kncydowTaLVbnJHBfRI3KGK3-HFCb75YCkF2JVjGa-9HyuZac2KudgXD7EAtAfeLrI6gdWlM/s1600-h/sar+17.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZZq92p8us0QR3oZqFLz9w5prm-y1pp8Y5MZnayK13AAQuLYdxirzMayb4-zeHGTb7MW3kncydowTaLVbnJHBfRI3KGK3-HFCb75YCkF2JVjGa-9HyuZac2KudgXD7EAtAfeLrI6gdWlM/s200/sar+17.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272010322405546242" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t believe Eric managed to throw that knife without hurting himself.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I can’t believe he got it in the vicinity of Buffy so she could catch it. I was sure it was going to land in the ceiling.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, maybe those yearbook nerds have something going for them after all. We throw a mean knife.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMUKNT14oFcqmpJXvcXRvAX50xbtvhUoxptX8JKCElRFDvYx_EMPIhIGVKrVEUIgfXpvSD9dWZ_zBnJldKfk88vr0V8Tc_ZyLO3A5gHwqA07IZDQkC05VcWpVlvku1p3UcJ34apCWgorI/s1600-h/sar+15.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMUKNT14oFcqmpJXvcXRvAX50xbtvhUoxptX8JKCElRFDvYx_EMPIhIGVKrVEUIgfXpvSD9dWZ_zBnJldKfk88vr0V8Tc_ZyLO3A5gHwqA07IZDQkC05VcWpVlvku1p3UcJ34apCWgorI/s200/sar+15.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272010318671660914" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And Cordelia saved by Buffy once again! Twice in one episode. I don’t give credit for this save to Xander. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No, it was Buffy. Although Cordelia has a nice scream.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Scream all you want.”</font color> Okay, <em>don’t.</em> Okay, now I’m going to hit you with a cake pan until you shut up.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Daryl’s Demise</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> With Chris’s theological issues, he needs churching up. Playing God, <em>ladeda-de-dah.</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s so bad about wanting to be the one who decides who lives and who dies?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No one is <em>supposed</em> to decide that, sweetie.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What, just leave it up to chance? That’s pretty irresponsible.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Irresponsible…?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s right. You’ve got nothing.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz1j3GhNhbz14VnCSXnEwxpg4X7kYdvakcMncwOev22kL2gG94sbX94wooDBVrhDolTJnneu4sd1myI-D0TkzYeNp1VLFgGnXda7Am8hQgbv-iP6uYnkNp-RibGIkCLEwJNchp5tNuTOk/s1600-h/sar+18.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz1j3GhNhbz14VnCSXnEwxpg4X7kYdvakcMncwOev22kL2gG94sbX94wooDBVrhDolTJnneu4sd1myI-D0TkzYeNp1VLFgGnXda7Am8hQgbv-iP6uYnkNp-RibGIkCLEwJNchp5tNuTOk/s200/sar+18.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272011924320448210" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Nice you finally showed up, Angel…so were you at the game? Did you enjoy it? Good win, huh?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> In this scene, we see how Cordelia is going to have her work cut out for her if she gets with Xander.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The odd thing here is, Xander isn’t even preoccupied with thoughts of Buffy in this scene. So Cordy is playing second-fiddle to what…? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander’s neuroses? His innate lack of self-worth?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> In any case, Xander just blew Cordy off. <br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Crazy Stuff</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkeexPenPjus0X53vBtHwR4xxozhQeRRKc7Y3dSnJPyBzJ1WFm4zt4PXyxRjo4EB7UMVyJbMvut6CQWt27CI43Y81vdRKIHdrJXrPH-5AHweJd_fcNOtObZJ1rTaDnh99rQVI9io3ZLI0/s1600-h/sar+19.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkeexPenPjus0X53vBtHwR4xxozhQeRRKc7Y3dSnJPyBzJ1WFm4zt4PXyxRjo4EB7UMVyJbMvut6CQWt27CI43Y81vdRKIHdrJXrPH-5AHweJd_fcNOtObZJ1rTaDnh99rQVI9io3ZLI0/s200/sar+19.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272012438990056946" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Love makes you do the wacky.”</font color> Kind of a trite, forced comment. Makes for a meh ending.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What’s so wrong with it?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s wrong with it? The lesson is that love makes you do stupid stuff, right? And how was that demonstrated, exactly? Chris loved his brother, okay, but he turned on him in the end…Daryl didn’t want to be alone, but he didn’t do anything other than bully his brother and his friends…Giles and Jenny, I get that, but he was a subplot…Buffy and Angel…their doomed love affair kind of peripheral this episode…<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNKe2ZPSSbtBmRCIfoaj7w8Yuvq5cki8Urb1BiPyr3PQzvgfBu7J2AX4fyw2N_O2WGMxc16DVNcCHvq7b3d8gongNyjdeyyhwmqXfy-9FG2NqbAZsYeFNlrewuejwxP5jt6dBH2E1B4gU/s1600-h/yikes+clown.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 194px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNKe2ZPSSbtBmRCIfoaj7w8Yuvq5cki8Urb1BiPyr3PQzvgfBu7J2AX4fyw2N_O2WGMxc16DVNcCHvq7b3d8gongNyjdeyyhwmqXfy-9FG2NqbAZsYeFNlrewuejwxP5jt6dBH2E1B4gU/s200/yikes+clown.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5272013097717496610" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Well, that’s just what you take away from it. Love makes you do the wacky.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And the “do the wacky” part. <strong>It makes me think of someone having sex with a clown.</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You need a beating.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Honk, honk!</em><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Next time: Season Two continues with <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/11/season-two-episode-two-112808-she-comes.html"><font color=yellow>“School Hard.”</font color></a><br />Oh, and by the way, <h2><font color=white>SPIKE!</font color></h2>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-46914592574724866202008-10-25T22:47:00.000-07:002008-10-25T23:57:05.713-07:00When She Was Bad<h3>Season Two, Episode One</h3><br />10/25/08<br /><br /><font color=red>HE</font color> is just relieved to be away from high school students. <font color=purple>SHE</font color> can’t stop chanting, “Season Two! Season Two!” It’s the stuff star-crossed romances are made of! In this episode, we learn what Buffy did during the summer, what Angel, the epitome of cool, has in common with another TV legend, and the trickiness of Latin-Sumerian translations. <br /><br /><h3>Boring Summer</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmHLVs0itWk0Ee2IV2aHIdWDrYw_yKXYKG_wmATD7i0wjLZpMIhAx4CP0gngtEv7rY-y_qUQwrJEcONHrWglaww9Hyv7iVj_SJ2dUoIlvCiuWk9PynbVqKkCBASpkAkCpWhYLzyrfbdfk/s1600-h/wswb008.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmHLVs0itWk0Ee2IV2aHIdWDrYw_yKXYKG_wmATD7i0wjLZpMIhAx4CP0gngtEv7rY-y_qUQwrJEcONHrWglaww9Hyv7iVj_SJ2dUoIlvCiuWk9PynbVqKkCBASpkAkCpWhYLzyrfbdfk/s200/wswb008.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261336519722780978" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s the beginning of the season premiere exposition ritual called, “So what did you do over the summer?” Joss Whedon is pretty inventive, but I think there’s some ones he hasn’t tried, don’t you? Like perhaps, I had interned for Howard Stern. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Went to Tibet to learn rug-weaving.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did a guest spot on Entourage.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <strong>Toured a coffin factory. Got a free pillow.</strong><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And the winner? She spent it with her dad. BOR-ING!<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I never noticed the spooky person standing there in the cemetery.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That was a <em>statue</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Looked spooky to me.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Last season on Buffy the Vampire Slayer.”</font color> Dang, a lot of stuff happened last season.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And yet they wrapped it up in less than twenty seconds.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The plinky piano music, the soft light, the almost kiss…cue vampire! Cue Xander almost dying! Cue Buffy’s rescue! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy looks so perky.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s hard to pull that off the first time around, let alone after you’ve died once.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <strong>Every time you die, you come back a little less perky.</strong><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If that’s the case, the Hindus are in serious trouble.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Back to School</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCXYJbMhvp2jpwngPZYoU4ZaXR_wYsNnxRdvNkVKDG2359OJY04k96wNz_t_ZzYKeEg9zFwV5K1pT92jIMKtMPezvuzjcJSfOAQMR4INlFvZ5YMtgVTLTrfMpFTw5jVM7dsHZuHlL6k2s/s1600-h/wswb105.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCXYJbMhvp2jpwngPZYoU4ZaXR_wYsNnxRdvNkVKDG2359OJY04k96wNz_t_ZzYKeEg9zFwV5K1pT92jIMKtMPezvuzjcJSfOAQMR4INlFvZ5YMtgVTLTrfMpFTw5jVM7dsHZuHlL6k2s/s200/wswb105.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261337130878559266" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Holy cow, those are hideous shoes.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But she’ll make them look fabulous.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, she won’t. Nobody will.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Can you have too much character?”</font color> Cordelia asks.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You can be too much of a character.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Good one</em>, Mr. Wolf.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh look, Principal Snyder is talking.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like how he compares teenagers to locusts.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like how Giles and Calendar play out the scene he’s describing behind him, and then ditch him.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“You’re the watcher. I just work here.”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s kind of new.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Don’t forget to punch your timecard, Buffy.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>I’m Ready</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP052kkpxOSiVFTQV9xZmE8OtLG4CuUsFiobWkqT_X0pFaBcu8PumdTbWst-2dqd3tNSzDphQSCmKa7eJ_GXWE1k7j-8RaUgN-OaZuTWC705SJcw442qZv_UaSz8T3wlkx7CUb8xoC3qI/s1600-h/wswb151.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP052kkpxOSiVFTQV9xZmE8OtLG4CuUsFiobWkqT_X0pFaBcu8PumdTbWst-2dqd3tNSzDphQSCmKa7eJ_GXWE1k7j-8RaUgN-OaZuTWC705SJcw442qZv_UaSz8T3wlkx7CUb8xoC3qI/s200/wswb151.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261337680263281986" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Video montage! Geez, Giles, wear pads next time! He’s been punched out by her, so he should know better.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> One would think.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wonder if that practice dummy will come out of the library budget.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You can’t bill that to the school!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe they stole it from the gymnasium and they’ll put it back later.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A New Danger</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijs6qyOmqFydoSVBx5h-uDkDwv4CAiGX1bKc8BAu__GH1L13v-hHycCdwECPMZe9xzp9ysLB3oJkYxdU4Y2B3UMNyiPfI_r1dF9GhMZutKXmYlOK8S4JCWLmmbfx6mGwFmyA0HJfBFxMA/s1600-h/wswb159.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijs6qyOmqFydoSVBx5h-uDkDwv4CAiGX1bKc8BAu__GH1L13v-hHycCdwECPMZe9xzp9ysLB3oJkYxdU4Y2B3UMNyiPfI_r1dF9GhMZutKXmYlOK8S4JCWLmmbfx6mGwFmyA0HJfBFxMA/s200/wswb159.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261338174376011554" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sweet Jesus, another freaking speech-a-thon. Someone kill this vampire, quickly.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>This</em> guy? I hate this guy!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This is a new guy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No, he’s not. He’s Luke from last year.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You're right. He’s even got the Maltese neck pendant thing going. Ponce.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That Anointed Kid bothers me.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’ve never wanted to slap a child more than that kid.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He draws it out of you. You see him, and you just want to waylay.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Weird Dreams</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPXrqnLD9aFEcyEY7Vs6_zzMi7hZ7ZbntJmWgzILmANJuX4MQe3QMbIuLbe_bXdRYSvXVftMQBASc3VExyL4q_iuta-aC7nliejYA8sQQVv8rcZPoRfR-QcsBNh2UT_fW6u7J4Ay9QmYQ/s1600-h/wswb179.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPXrqnLD9aFEcyEY7Vs6_zzMi7hZ7ZbntJmWgzILmANJuX4MQe3QMbIuLbe_bXdRYSvXVftMQBASc3VExyL4q_iuta-aC7nliejYA8sQQVv8rcZPoRfR-QcsBNh2UT_fW6u7J4Ay9QmYQ/s200/wswb179.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261338926039390834" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Let’s psychoanalyze this dream. It’s obvious she blames Giles for what happened. And her friends are mere observers in the whole thing, and they either won’t or can’t help.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And what are Willow and Xander eating? Fruit. The fruit of her labors.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What?! I didn’t know she was working part-time in an apple orchard.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was just geeking out about how cool Giles is when he’s being a bad-ass. Even in Season Two.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPqM2wm_O5NkuHFepEDcBqC_A4CQXjWI69VO_HRBcISCqYiiryVpw-mFefz0nvYS_5eeW_QCnHbkoLL2TY7hTC-GaiMbTSkWEG7dQ_PcbZjxbkkyO30I9cPnMmkjuZBKiGFd_h8O79j-g/s1600-h/wswb192.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPqM2wm_O5NkuHFepEDcBqC_A4CQXjWI69VO_HRBcISCqYiiryVpw-mFefz0nvYS_5eeW_QCnHbkoLL2TY7hTC-GaiMbTSkWEG7dQ_PcbZjxbkkyO30I9cPnMmkjuZBKiGFd_h8O79j-g/s200/wswb192.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261339154978328834" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She wakes up and Angel’s sitting there. How creepy is that?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s rather nonplussed by now. She manages a pretty good jab: <font color=yellow>“What is it for you? Lunch hour?”</font color><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>Angel says the Anointed One has been gathering forces. I hear he’s been over to Chucky Cheese for recruits.</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s giving them free tokens.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> For 800 tickets you can get a free Gnarl demon.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4iXOqkZFwgc7VbySpEXzG1kyFhkFEu7oLLaBhmq8KipN8uYqNLVMOKwmrEK_ceTuXhyphenhyphenRw6xYpxBrlruQjsj-2c3e9cnFZ1apPK5JtoHPTbAlEW8NL9cu_x5ivKDqBVUSrdUYBqmGU9Dg/s1600-h/fonz.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 161px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4iXOqkZFwgc7VbySpEXzG1kyFhkFEu7oLLaBhmq8KipN8uYqNLVMOKwmrEK_ceTuXhyphenhyphenRw6xYpxBrlruQjsj-2c3e9cnFZ1apPK5JtoHPTbAlEW8NL9cu_x5ivKDqBVUSrdUYBqmGU9Dg/s200/fonz.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261339484354337954" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy turns over. I guess Angel can let himself out. The window. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s like the Fonz! He even has dark hair and wears a leather jacket.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Coincidence? I don’t think so! He puts the “aaaaaaaaaaay” in Angel.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3> “What’s Up With Her?” </h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjCqsyMCw9iNbyUtIsMGcPW58GDBCIXQKYxYFgKMFimAuPV4G0wQk8v1trjvdqQ40yFpwPftrN8RQNLJ5hnHp32Oz8mmIapMJE1mCTTHOk7k22Tytic2-T8Nk16QncfYXh8ZDMhLhggig/s1600-h/wswb228.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjCqsyMCw9iNbyUtIsMGcPW58GDBCIXQKYxYFgKMFimAuPV4G0wQk8v1trjvdqQ40yFpwPftrN8RQNLJ5hnHp32Oz8mmIapMJE1mCTTHOk7k22Tytic2-T8Nk16QncfYXh8ZDMhLhggig/s200/wswb228.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261340319152228754" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy looks great in those sunglasses.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But sweet sassy molassy! That’s a high waistline on those green pants. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Back in the day…<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Great. Not another “back in the day” moment.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Okay, fine. But you have to admit Xander’s shirt is fugly! <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least it doesn’t have a bunny on it this time. Will I sound too metro if I say I love Cordelia’s top in this scene?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Because you’re assuming I’m talking about her chest?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLnbcRp1iQnrESxSpg7-M6mFpGMRpx_i5PUwjftg-UCVSj29Y42dSakVjoHDSowzWoxwhjrQyrRk3RvLVxhVn_o3oJElybjaIiO0Qn-vFeiP_fNnx4i_R3x81aLkeVenBnafYa62b30ok/s1600-h/wswb237.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLnbcRp1iQnrESxSpg7-M6mFpGMRpx_i5PUwjftg-UCVSj29Y42dSakVjoHDSowzWoxwhjrQyrRk3RvLVxhVn_o3oJElybjaIiO0Qn-vFeiP_fNnx4i_R3x81aLkeVenBnafYa62b30ok/s200/wswb237.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261340543486931778" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey! Cibo Matto is going to be at the Bronze tonight! At least that’s what both Xander and the poster on the wall say! Think Joss is plugging the band?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> In case you’re wondering what music this is, here’s the band again! Cibo Matto!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did I mention Cibo Matto is in this episode? All joking aside, I have to say I don’t hate them.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Advice from Cordelia</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What do you make of these Cibo Matto lyrics? <font color=yellow>“The velocity of time turns her voice into sugar water…”</font color> WTF?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think it’s cool. <font color=yellow>“The buildings are changing into coconut trees.”</font color> Everyone in California smokes the doobie.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I believe they're from Japan.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I assure you that doobies are still in play.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFu8PKJEpil8rergoNYb2CY2gDuQAhyMdNKhVcGvOYQunmpD8s-gkgVcakC77-yZu633M8LwhjLiRcsyBigdz_xgzOnYbubEZh7R319ar2Oi6NA1bl0zSqYhi8nr8cKuJ-PVC9dUPlXu4/s1600-h/wswb288.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFu8PKJEpil8rergoNYb2CY2gDuQAhyMdNKhVcGvOYQunmpD8s-gkgVcakC77-yZu633M8LwhjLiRcsyBigdz_xgzOnYbubEZh7R319ar2Oi6NA1bl0zSqYhi8nr8cKuJ-PVC9dUPlXu4/s200/wswb288.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261341416111388498" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy is mean! This sexy dance Buffy does is simply beyond the pale.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You didn’t enjoy it?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, I thoroughly enjoyed it, but I hope Xander is thinking about the “Where’s the Beef?” lady or something.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander can’t dance, but at least that shirt doesn’t suck.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow> “Get over it.”</font color> Excellent advice, Cordelia! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s actually quite profound. Too bad she gets kidnapped right afterward.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Buffy’s Issues</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh good grief! The vampires didn’t even clean up after themselves. How rude!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Was she going to the grave to deal with her issues? Dance on it, or something?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>I think Buffy has post-traumatic stress disorder.</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What are the symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Irritability, flashbacks, insomnia, jumpiness…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s kind of rare she gets angry with everyone in the scene.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> PTSD, I’m telling you.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhElfwRiJlmstzl-8lWFKTRedLpPlg820LE2_4k-XPDP2biLZLgNGzwMbN9GMXhFqVndOeUyIyfFrB58BjIYjN83OutF_DSsX1OoulVw9VjlOWyFcnvTjp0w1Or5CSjoTnkhUySze4ZDKk/s1600-h/wswb376.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhElfwRiJlmstzl-8lWFKTRedLpPlg820LE2_4k-XPDP2biLZLgNGzwMbN9GMXhFqVndOeUyIyfFrB58BjIYjN83OutF_DSsX1OoulVw9VjlOWyFcnvTjp0w1Or5CSjoTnkhUySze4ZDKk/s200/wswb376.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261342177362359426" /></a> <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Some of us have class. Some of us have jobs.” </font color> Principal Snyder lets off some good ones in this episode.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I bet you have to scurry back to the classroom because you’re always chatting it up from the kids.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, I’m the one who says, “Have a good vacation. Out you go!”<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Showdown with Angel</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ooh, Latin…such an exotic language, Giles! Oh come on! <strong>It’s the Helvetica of spooky languages.</strong><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Does she suggest a fight to the death with Angel?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s some foreshadowing! Because they will fight later in the season.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4yOs9UGAhyphenhyphenqwelO5LzCXW5qZjbZiWwJgPUPSbTIKElEE44tOpXEzygGXLBJTqyoVbhFDE0jTG_VZE0hwlx57xXENuJH5gnv5akrjeEah6iC0pJ-k4TFqoEbG24VYu9kAks46xi-zpd6E/s1600-h/wswb400.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4yOs9UGAhyphenhyphenqwelO5LzCXW5qZjbZiWwJgPUPSbTIKElEE44tOpXEzygGXLBJTqyoVbhFDE0jTG_VZE0hwlx57xXENuJH5gnv5akrjeEah6iC0pJ-k4TFqoEbG24VYu9kAks46xi-zpd6E/s200/wswb400.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261342987112717266" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love the argument they’re having. Doesn’t he wonder about whether he could take her in a fight? When she finally does fight him, she’s reluctant, but he isn’t anymore. The tables have turned.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What I want to know is why she is so concerned about the others’ safety. As I recall, the only one to die last season was her. And that Jesse guy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And everyone snuck up on her. Six times.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She should at least be grateful, because if anything, the Scoobies can be like those canaries you send down in the mineshaft.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She didn’t do that last season. And I don’t think they offered, either.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m just saying she could. Like with Xander, for instance. I’m just saying.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Trap</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwaRoEXWL7f8TkJ7TypoB78sDcC6VcfBNdJ07SNS0anNAHW5SUILcrHWI671e12oB1FoyCjXBVGjwWJXAIXivN8It3vJ4IZYGMZAa7pLTsXHmCIqO-ZzQhN5SW9gt0ts_7Hs5lmexI-68/s1600-h/wswb421.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwaRoEXWL7f8TkJ7TypoB78sDcC6VcfBNdJ07SNS0anNAHW5SUILcrHWI671e12oB1FoyCjXBVGjwWJXAIXivN8It3vJ4IZYGMZAa7pLTsXHmCIqO-ZzQhN5SW9gt0ts_7Hs5lmexI-68/s200/wswb421.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261343507233683842" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A retranslation from Sumerian, I see. It must have been a syntactically bad passage. I was wondering why Latin was giving him problems, of all things.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I see someone didn’t consult their Latin-Sumerian dictionary!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ancient scholars, my ass.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So how did the bad guys know Buffy would run off? That seemed to be an integral part of their plan.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It worked out nicely for them. Maybe they were back in the stacks waiting for her to leave.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Interrupted Ritual</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGc27mUh0VTGBBZ3ie5u33Dgjn-ozEDojPEyrVPlzbH5YINZqUjp98QoVkqFrs3bLSzK4G-DXnTyMYe8SiPfszEkttEGYpGLtYv3WtDBZgy8LeHg7eKmRc8I1xZrRwRT-2gGk2mCZJJr0/s1600-h/wswb453.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGc27mUh0VTGBBZ3ie5u33Dgjn-ozEDojPEyrVPlzbH5YINZqUjp98QoVkqFrs3bLSzK4G-DXnTyMYe8SiPfszEkttEGYpGLtYv3WtDBZgy8LeHg7eKmRc8I1xZrRwRT-2gGk2mCZJJr0/s200/wswb453.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261345878082315170" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Check out Buffy with the torture. And this is ten years before Abu Ghraib.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Can you waterboard a vampire?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They can survive under water.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, you can still force them into <strong>a naked human pyramid.</strong> What? Too soon?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2-UGztLPSdMCGOoMNoODgFaKNW5YbO2rEtrBkm47kbjA_6HTJ2WR7TGgHU2qIA-Xf18BbfOshuzp6d4yLlkkcPsV0344LI3ReHTGwwegZkJh6kkmfmwQSOcyhlvYGxtwojRE3OxHW0V8/s1600-h/wswb487.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2-UGztLPSdMCGOoMNoODgFaKNW5YbO2rEtrBkm47kbjA_6HTJ2WR7TGgHU2qIA-Xf18BbfOshuzp6d4yLlkkcPsV0344LI3ReHTGwwegZkJh6kkmfmwQSOcyhlvYGxtwojRE3OxHW0V8/s200/wswb487.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261345885209767378" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>Why doesn’t Angel or Buffy just grab the skull and start playing keepaway with it?</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sure! Yeah, you can bring him back. He’ll just be headless.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They’re all like, blah blah blah, save the hostages, blah blah blah. Although Angel’s taking his time with that one vampire.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Over? </h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1tcicK-lV_rLzNku0h9CpSajB84BRvC5iJbCCWYmJICr6E6kdKccKn_DdYdTTSuzN3ygi_slD_5YtYOz17M7tnWaN95-ZcPJJB9oaPBIzBTSQgFA617KO2TDmyok30U6S-sOW47Epm8U/s1600-h/wswb502.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1tcicK-lV_rLzNku0h9CpSajB84BRvC5iJbCCWYmJICr6E6kdKccKn_DdYdTTSuzN3ygi_slD_5YtYOz17M7tnWaN95-ZcPJJB9oaPBIzBTSQgFA617KO2TDmyok30U6S-sOW47Epm8U/s200/wswb502.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261345892087254386" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Smash it! Smash it! Smash! Crash! Smash-crash!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s so upset. I feel so sorry for her.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There are very few pains in this world that a sledgehammer can’t solve.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t understand why Giles didn’t smash up the bones in the first place.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah! Or at least bury it in separate, secret locations.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I guess a neon sign saying “HERE LIES THE MASTER” would have been too obvious.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Saved You a Seat</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What is that horrible thing Calendar is wearing around her neck?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That necklace looks like it belongs to Flo from Alice.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Kiss my grits, Giles.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Saved you a seat? Apparently no assigned seating from Mr. Cox.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do you always have assigned seats?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Damn straight I do. Cuts down on the chatter. Now if it could only do something about this goofy Steve Winwoody music.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It reminds me of the theme from <em>Baywatch</em>.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRBDQhyVAfcZiKvNdRM8wSpfIC7Ou4dk1WqF1tlCD1ALxp8cinA-so5j8FoV9_d323kUuvz_DOJkvw2z2ds1cE_7RYaNxpo4_nXRx4dqArZuayEUOyW_csMIvs55_tRvGi7nRJjWH_fPQ/s1600-h/wswb565.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRBDQhyVAfcZiKvNdRM8wSpfIC7Ou4dk1WqF1tlCD1ALxp8cinA-so5j8FoV9_d323kUuvz_DOJkvw2z2ds1cE_7RYaNxpo4_nXRx4dqArZuayEUOyW_csMIvs55_tRvGi7nRJjWH_fPQ/s200/wswb565.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5261345895984851490" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There’s that kid, if you want to smack him before the show ends.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wonder if he knows that Cibo Matto is playing at the Bronze.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“I hate that girl.” </font color> That’s a good line.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Probably the only non-annoying thing the Anointed One says in his pathetic little life.<br /><br /><br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/DlR1NijJxV4&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DlR1NijJxV4&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Next time: Season Two continues with <font color=yellow>“Some Assembly Required.” </font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-92118075217964819252008-10-11T20:45:00.000-07:002008-10-11T22:14:18.120-07:00Prophecy Girl10/8/08<br /><br /><h3>The Master Shall Rise</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWOlk2fcLxV8LCr-tG4h_Xbqv3hmgXpo4wGAIbdxQYlXUcCzJiRHgem_0FrdfDnwBF_SL-BA7Mgjz6xBwIUEGogWmSQBUCNIlQEIqyfzYY2CwaJ-l3OM043ZDN4LE6n4S-z0xvMWhbVAM/s1600-h/xander+dork.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWOlk2fcLxV8LCr-tG4h_Xbqv3hmgXpo4wGAIbdxQYlXUcCzJiRHgem_0FrdfDnwBF_SL-BA7Mgjz6xBwIUEGogWmSQBUCNIlQEIqyfzYY2CwaJ-l3OM043ZDN4LE6n4S-z0xvMWhbVAM/s200/xander+dork.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256109359207657522" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Brace yourself, honey.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, sweet Jesus, does it ever <em>stop </em>with this guy?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No. No it doesn’t. <br /><br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ouch, that had to hurt.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like the slow-mo Buffy toss onto the ground.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFow57GSmvoUnYd8ZnMaNsaWm8FBeGMUZwHvCpCW7CNOIImgQcuu-JPT3uJbbYGy3tI8dd3xCqIqIq_Ml6xtQA0cm1VoLe83gMSxeThxotGxDFU48oTxVJk6ktN77aFfaBr6E9LS7iUyI/s1600-h/prophecygirl038.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFow57GSmvoUnYd8ZnMaNsaWm8FBeGMUZwHvCpCW7CNOIImgQcuu-JPT3uJbbYGy3tI8dd3xCqIqIq_Ml6xtQA0cm1VoLe83gMSxeThxotGxDFU48oTxVJk6ktN77aFfaBr6E9LS7iUyI/s200/prophecygirl038.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256109721982639106" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I also liked her slow smirk as the vampire realizes who it’s up against.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t think there are any other fight scenes in the series shot like that one.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Ho korias phanaytie toutay tay nuktee.</em> The Master Shall rise, and the slayer…What? Turns bi? Eats fries? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We don’t get enough views of the library through the skylight.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did we realize there was a skylight before this episode?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes! Yes! Shake, earth! Look! It’s the Master’s sex face!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I am not frightened by this master…bator. The 5.1 question was funny, though.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Xander and Buffy</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXx3g_6jCTer8dOEqJshxytg55QbKCC-H7Mdps09L19bMyAr1G1U20opFTP5tKNWWngC61FPrdenknWhf7WDWgIAgcsrlw7hkDJfMLCBOEjx2Av5MhWQW21HS1qjBYp5Jx5mj-McgUwmY/s1600-h/prophecygirl096.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXx3g_6jCTer8dOEqJshxytg55QbKCC-H7Mdps09L19bMyAr1G1U20opFTP5tKNWWngC61FPrdenknWhf7WDWgIAgcsrlw7hkDJfMLCBOEjx2Av5MhWQW21HS1qjBYp5Jx5mj-McgUwmY/s200/prophecygirl096.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256110565395133602" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The vampires are getting cockier. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like those sunglasses…very steampunk.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I liked them too. I didn’t know they were steampunk, though.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sure. Round, and goggle-ly. I want a pair.<br /><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Does that ‘leave’ thing actually work?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not unless you’re a Jedi. How did Xander get that kid to leave?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is it possible Xander wasn't at the bottom of the social ladder after all?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If such a place exists, I don't want to imagine it.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv3JxSo44OPTVxDhFWQqIfJ61OG_NeLjGp9HcQZDPNzOnsUZO8sUPbjLjH-dr1-S-Zp8hDwegf_JFvwVXDEC2Kwnrj8Zw9ZoYdtkeRHxNODZV42QWEjL101pRoqZ7XbH617alzo2tCKsE/s1600-h/prophecygirl131.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv3JxSo44OPTVxDhFWQqIfJ61OG_NeLjGp9HcQZDPNzOnsUZO8sUPbjLjH-dr1-S-Zp8hDwegf_JFvwVXDEC2Kwnrj8Zw9ZoYdtkeRHxNODZV42QWEjL101pRoqZ7XbH617alzo2tCKsE/s200/prophecygirl131.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256111424127068146" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Such a painful scene.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Watch, his heart breaks into three pieces here.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=orange>“Desperation is a stinky cologne,”</font color> like they say in <em>Super Troopers</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She was honest with him, and he gets snotty in the end. Men. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander turns into a little bitch when he gets rejected. Then he gets indignant. Buffy doesn’t want to spoil the friendship they have. By spoil she means violate it six ways from Sunday. Yuck!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Apocalypse? </h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWbnpEe_GtQyDQneEvre-Hk5cIGgH595dyesS3GeKEX_gl41ABbagFgFFi6T606HoaRClXYYJFSdXCGmwPeUJx5B3DVJW3G-1nbmGG2ZQnODYDJZC1onYWn3ljGoEDxMIeN3R7gQ52O2s/s1600-h/prophecygirl159.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWbnpEe_GtQyDQneEvre-Hk5cIGgH595dyesS3GeKEX_gl41ABbagFgFFi6T606HoaRClXYYJFSdXCGmwPeUJx5B3DVJW3G-1nbmGG2ZQnODYDJZC1onYWn3ljGoEDxMIeN3R7gQ52O2s/s200/prophecygirl159.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256111893020726626" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Miss Calendar’s dress is horrible. It was like a plaid wannabe.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think she’s pretty.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes. But her dress, it was horrible.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you notice the horseshoe Giles has above his door?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, there was one. I don’t think it brings him much luck, though. And Giles’s calendar is turned to June. What's up with that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Weird. I thought it was May.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe they had a bunch of snowdays.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Now Xander’s been rejected by two women.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow is very sweet in this scene…and assertive.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nice to see. It’s actually kind of surprising, considering she has the hots for him.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFmij3386276-f_cXfMxO5FflUSN_pZx4utzs3YFvRhehYWFGYlHrIOjU-HMJC_XIFKC2TSiQw_hJyXS9mdZ58O5_dqaDovGzNHBUOngukFl1uWPJE8Y95sf-z60crrGm2OiJVZowS2ms/s1600-h/prophecygirl244.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFmij3386276-f_cXfMxO5FflUSN_pZx4utzs3YFvRhehYWFGYlHrIOjU-HMJC_XIFKC2TSiQw_hJyXS9mdZ58O5_dqaDovGzNHBUOngukFl1uWPJE8Y95sf-z60crrGm2OiJVZowS2ms/s200/prophecygirl244.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256113153401163762" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>Xander’s going to listen to country music? More like Xander will be masturbating</strong>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Eww!</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know it’s true.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Prediction</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles says that Buffy has thwarted prophecies. Have we had any prophecies yet?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “You may already be a winner”?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “The value of some collectible plates may not go up. They may go down.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> "Supplies are limited. Act now"?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji6qZQHua68X1K-e_NOuoQftILH5ddNfC2vZuL00RI0aSfp_KhEvyj_WNmy1NHlHU82MuS6c1WaLs2fmCxt49M7aA9FU1Oq5EVNKUQ-srb50OyC5QSMMTPk9nYVnVgBXoILJ5ewgoQKDE/s1600-h/prophecygirl219.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji6qZQHua68X1K-e_NOuoQftILH5ddNfC2vZuL00RI0aSfp_KhEvyj_WNmy1NHlHU82MuS6c1WaLs2fmCxt49M7aA9FU1Oq5EVNKUQ-srb50OyC5QSMMTPk9nYVnVgBXoILJ5ewgoQKDE/s200/prophecygirl219.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256112627091882258" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Do you think it’ll hurt?”</font color> I love the way she delivers this line, so vulnerable. She’s crying.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like her thinking. When things get tough, quit.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s struggling with her responsibility. <font color=yellow>“I’m sixteen years old. I don’t want to die.”</font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We don’t want her to die, either.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander should be the one to die, not her!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Buffy Quits</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“Sometimes I do know what you’re thinking”</font color> Ah, Joyce “Dramatic Irony” Summers.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And here we have dufus Joyce with no clue what’s going on.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Joyce met Buffy’s father going stag at a party, and Joyce’s father was with someone else. Why am I not surprised?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This will come back in seven seven when we find out he’s run off with the secretary.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>An Attack</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That is a roomful of dead teenagers.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like the deception in this scene. Ah, the boys are watching cartoons. And you think she’s going to walk up to the couch and see her boyfriend dead. And then she opens the door and her boyfriend falls out.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It also explains why Cordelia wanted Willow to set up the AV. So they could walk in on this bloodbath together.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaTVBSznKyDLFxeuQeRbs5k4qReyabqcX07d-IjQXEtDUEi3qGxsnYzi9csD6SwbaCUrbSvPLm5L7U_jz-3iFzj4gI7bHjbVMzXaZ16ot9PKMqxcz9ovzJQUUXAZAXEuE0KEAuI8rdQto/s1600-h/prophecygirl300.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaTVBSznKyDLFxeuQeRbs5k4qReyabqcX07d-IjQXEtDUEi3qGxsnYzi9csD6SwbaCUrbSvPLm5L7U_jz-3iFzj4gI7bHjbVMzXaZ16ot9PKMqxcz9ovzJQUUXAZAXEuE0KEAuI8rdQto/s200/prophecygirl300.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256113656536806130" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> What do you think of Buffy’s dress?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love it. It’s beautiful.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think a later-series Buffy could have pulled it off, though. Too skinny.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She slimmed down as she went on.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Sending the Child</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhszTshW88GnBHAFFzBxzco_x2dzNhAkZ7pp4329P1WXlSWb7vjKZM2rZDOweIQ6z5e1HehjPPXyZUoUjbqtp0mfptuubHzZXeQ_ovg6KsI05QRuOJTdd-DCCEOt08cZqXmcoF_MIJIWP0/s1600-h/prophecygirl324.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhszTshW88GnBHAFFzBxzco_x2dzNhAkZ7pp4329P1WXlSWb7vjKZM2rZDOweIQ6z5e1HehjPPXyZUoUjbqtp0mfptuubHzZXeQ_ovg6KsI05QRuOJTdd-DCCEOt08cZqXmcoF_MIJIWP0/s200/prophecygirl324.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256114172091290914" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When is this barrier supposed to stop baking? He keeps testing it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s like a mouth sore you can’t stop putting your tongue on.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m still not scared of the master.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why should you be? It's not like he's going to rise from the Hellmouth any time soon. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <strong>He's the Global Warming of villains. Someday, he might get you.</strong><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It's a wonder you don't have crackpot Watchers saying there isn't enough evidence for his existence.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles gets slapped down by his slayer!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I forgot that she punches him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not the last time she does. These characters have a habit of suckerpunching each other on this show.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It only gets worse as it goes on. It’s a rough crowd.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Going After the Master</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh joy, creepy kid again.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you catch the Borg reference?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I did. I love that Locutus is based on the Latin word <em>loquor</em>, to speak. I am truly a word geek.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander, “man” of action. I’m doing the finger quotes thing around the word man.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He doesn’t act like a man, but when no one takes him seriously, he gets all snotty.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This character has a lot of verisimilitude. Like a lot of teenagers I know.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpB2j0bvJhw3gLEtXB0xi7RMTdMEUtPNvpxNt7hWyJ8ZG_EPgyCXqfrer_sfoCR6vl_5Ari1c7RLutTgm5h_PF9cS1q4csf_Y7R4vnon5gdYlkLECC_W4bdIVPkBvPZ6DKxt3JcPYgdEc/s1600-h/prophecygirl399.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpB2j0bvJhw3gLEtXB0xi7RMTdMEUtPNvpxNt7hWyJ8ZG_EPgyCXqfrer_sfoCR6vl_5Ari1c7RLutTgm5h_PF9cS1q4csf_Y7R4vnon5gdYlkLECC_W4bdIVPkBvPZ6DKxt3JcPYgdEc/s200/prophecygirl399.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256115608260352610" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Ooh</em>, Xander with the cross. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Interesting exchange.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why doesn’t Angel just slap it out of his hand?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Part of the problem is Angel puts up with Xander. If he slapped him around a little bit, the whole relationship would be different.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But then Buffy would get pissed off.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m thinking she’d get over it.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Giving In</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkQHA8EFLZ0DQO6pg-AdhPtCCvcb4eXD-wgOyi4X_dunOyCLavBtBYLWenQrlxQC8WG1PrssaNOef9uqhwQLYivfTRHTxJQnq_VGjSIWVnyeNLgKbaKcmhjX63-tvGChHhGci4_LKNquA/s1600-h/prophecygirl412.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkQHA8EFLZ0DQO6pg-AdhPtCCvcb4eXD-wgOyi4X_dunOyCLavBtBYLWenQrlxQC8WG1PrssaNOef9uqhwQLYivfTRHTxJQnq_VGjSIWVnyeNLgKbaKcmhjX63-tvGChHhGci4_LKNquA/s200/prophecygirl412.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256116938766434594" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Where’s shortcake going?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Isaiah said “a child would lead them,” not “a child would lead them, and then hang around to see what happens.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is he going home to bed? Is he going to put on his footie pajamas?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Now that I think about it, isn't he supposed to be the Master's protege? You'd think he'd at least want to see how it's done.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Who cares? Let's just count our blessings that he's off-screen for a while.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why is Angel panting, if he has no breath?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Good question.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is he just showing off? <em>Ooh, I ran down here!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe he’s just used to it; he never outgrew it when he became a vampire.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Vestigial breathing?<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Going Aboveground</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwyBxzx-HPpJ2EPevRfblN4EflvSGekdoUMd46vsK-Z7ZcN_s2ylYSXAI5Y3JWdbMSaLyhVvQRu7ZASURXdt4YprJrNriFtan9U2Y2TAEoDBn9MeyZom0oALcJY1kc3KiyXvf06LTgrSA/s1600-h/prophecygirl541.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwyBxzx-HPpJ2EPevRfblN4EflvSGekdoUMd46vsK-Z7ZcN_s2ylYSXAI5Y3JWdbMSaLyhVvQRu7ZASURXdt4YprJrNriFtan9U2Y2TAEoDBn9MeyZom0oALcJY1kc3KiyXvf06LTgrSA/s200/prophecygirl541.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256118466036409698" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordy to the rescue! Well, she’s been saved enough times this season, I guess it’s only fitting.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Black is white. Night is day. Buffy’s dead? Cordelia to the rescue?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Bang-up job, too. Cordelia drove her car into the school! Worst driver ever.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She was probably looking for an excuse to do that all year.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I want to know how she got her license, what with flunking Driver's Ed twice. Remember <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/search/label/Witch">"Witch"</a>?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I had forgotten! Cordelia truly is a bad, bad driver. Forget Buffy. Just have Cordelia run over the Master.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes, Willow, wheel the copier in front of the doors. That’ll help.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Hey, copiers are heavy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least take it off the cart then.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPmWJcvfeU1s6yA3pR-vxVyHnSj6mILpPTyiJUJVTFuJYFJgjWtlz93iR6uhRwuiXBkb7PWc2pm1zsc89P8o0Uqb4BgLyqnyOE59JuAqqisT1RqfMqtsKRc8ysKcn-e-9ADjVfUzBh81w/s1600-h/prophecygirl481.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPmWJcvfeU1s6yA3pR-vxVyHnSj6mILpPTyiJUJVTFuJYFJgjWtlz93iR6uhRwuiXBkb7PWc2pm1zsc89P8o0Uqb4BgLyqnyOE59JuAqqisT1RqfMqtsKRc8ysKcn-e-9ADjVfUzBh81w/s200/prophecygirl481.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256117850016270242" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>Buffy gets bit so many times, her neck has track marks like a heroin addict’s.</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I forgot she got bit by the Master. I thought Angel was the only one.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Nope. Her neck’s the village bicycle. Everyone gets a turn. Except Xander.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do you ever get tired of being crude?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is that a rhetorical question?<br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Fighting Power</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5kEMTePfL3cH-mKQR7bsXXrwaZbjvzRU0iHVj7JYUYoqE565lAnmkvI0DH6UcgNZYmltZ1vFE9hrPm5ICpfp4H2R6I2-HcAR7Y058ZDi_u8ZNSZ3h6A3Lh9XHATuSPG0ze9jxzvPHK3I/s1600-h/prophecygirl575.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5kEMTePfL3cH-mKQR7bsXXrwaZbjvzRU0iHVj7JYUYoqE565lAnmkvI0DH6UcgNZYmltZ1vFE9hrPm5ICpfp4H2R6I2-HcAR7Y058ZDi_u8ZNSZ3h6A3Lh9XHATuSPG0ze9jxzvPHK3I/s200/prophecygirl575.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256120314604621666" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Never before and never again do we hear the theme song during the show itself. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought “rock and roll, holy smokes, they’re playing the theme.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Wasn’t this supposed to be the only season? That might have been why.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Joss Whedon likes to film people marching toward stuff.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We should film ourselves doing that.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What would we march towards?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The only place you march toward with a purpose is the dinner table.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, <em>snap!</em><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Hellmouth Demon</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBHQpXfOW1zA5zs7xqY1rdU68PYK32Vy9Got8W7tJo1L46pa53HSiYQd0ViC0g5dB01U4h-MJhIiGw7SstVkdfU7mi6csbJJDGkHRT9ajLMQ5lOcB1j_AawC_aUYKOhoW9uaTWk96JRsQ/s1600-h/prophecygirl589.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBHQpXfOW1zA5zs7xqY1rdU68PYK32Vy9Got8W7tJo1L46pa53HSiYQd0ViC0g5dB01U4h-MJhIiGw7SstVkdfU7mi6csbJJDGkHRT9ajLMQ5lOcB1j_AawC_aUYKOhoW9uaTWk96JRsQ/s200/prophecygirl589.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256120716416321554" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a fugly demon. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s scary. Rock on.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like a hydra. I think it was inspired by Whedon's <em>Aliens</em> days.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9LLD5x25h9y_J4cbH0h4ud7Pu1XACeWyv_yb-prHOIQMQmVPAjbXXLYf_gASZvmhkGiLj2MQ3Gg4RTlxp3v3jQC4OYTR4o49Q1ptG5pDfhHvaugqERmF-W0WEWPZyq8jdgZvvtNmG4Y0/s1600-h/prophecygirl609.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9LLD5x25h9y_J4cbH0h4ud7Pu1XACeWyv_yb-prHOIQMQmVPAjbXXLYf_gASZvmhkGiLj2MQ3Gg4RTlxp3v3jQC4OYTR4o49Q1ptG5pDfhHvaugqERmF-W0WEWPZyq8jdgZvvtNmG4Y0/s200/prophecygirl609.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256121354577615986" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“I may be dead, but I’m still pretty. Which is more than I can say for you.”</font color> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Great line. I liked her line about hell at the end. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I liked <font color=yellow>“You have fruit punch mouth.”</font color> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It <em>must</em> be a great scene. We're reduced to parroting quotes.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What you said.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Aftermath</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYb-5L9UjAEjUDdxZQ70g6kUE8o6J0NZ_q2MSUNpmRf-34f6-c9qtn66f4_OHuipDDRRLX4AKLaySp10z7tKgMsMSqIuKcBJHXE2gHr6hFAvZ3Yhl3gwG6-ExoNYgSihenJwvGJON0kFw/s1600-h/prophecygirl672.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYb-5L9UjAEjUDdxZQ70g6kUE8o6J0NZ_q2MSUNpmRf-34f6-c9qtn66f4_OHuipDDRRLX4AKLaySp10z7tKgMsMSqIuKcBJHXE2gHr6hFAvZ3Yhl3gwG6-ExoNYgSihenJwvGJON0kFw/s200/prophecygirl672.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256122320530806274" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why didn’t the skeleton get dusted?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I want to know why the skeleton didn't get up and keep fighting! Lazy skeleton!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He doesn't have any heart.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> ...<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim6n6jz3PnSC2VzGB3aAKxZNKEzZpPZhmefsDX4suJU1-13fewb0EM8jnlA3woA0htNrysoJkmmX_zY1JJdNGiAATPLHTwm0Tf1fp3Fxuaho-YCyhtYKUe4f9HU13NW-AEW6i86h7eArA/s1600-h/prophecygirl644.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim6n6jz3PnSC2VzGB3aAKxZNKEzZpPZhmefsDX4suJU1-13fewb0EM8jnlA3woA0htNrysoJkmmX_zY1JJdNGiAATPLHTwm0Tf1fp3Fxuaho-YCyhtYKUe4f9HU13NW-AEW6i86h7eArA/s200/prophecygirl644.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5256123240755373602" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Now, the slow walk, with the Theme Song slow plinky piano version.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Their back-to-normal banter is so reassuring..<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s one apocalypse down.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yay. We finished Season One. Any comments about the season as a whole?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Season One is not one of my favorite seasons, but it’s fun to watch. Quite a few things I don’t think I’d seen before. What was your favorite part of Season One?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t know. I guess the one with Sid the Puppet.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And "Out of Mind, Out of Sight." I liked that one.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I kind of liked “The Pack,” too. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I feel like we should celebrate or do something.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Wanna watch <em>Fight Club?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You really know how to talk to a girl.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay, fine. <em>Tombstone?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Now you're talking.<br /><br /><br />Next Time: Season Two's premiere episode, <font color=yellow>"When She Was Bad."</font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-36955779363060212122008-10-04T23:08:00.000-07:002008-10-11T22:12:53.183-07:00Out of Mind, Out of Sight“Out of Mind, Out of Sight”<br />10/4/08<br /><br /><h3>The Popular Ones</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoT8ceQikCZUxFr9dxEQks0xHomQWlmAum25Q8vkeLpMkdSukfzgvlgfDKUY02GWBLoK3vOcBiku0rGeNRPmuqcr9PX_IpdTVm6X8F_i62VRW4TPMoF8oxzN9-CB8jvDK65S6xOx4SL5E/s1600-h/cordy+its+all+about+me.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoT8ceQikCZUxFr9dxEQks0xHomQWlmAum25Q8vkeLpMkdSukfzgvlgfDKUY02GWBLoK3vOcBiku0rGeNRPmuqcr9PX_IpdTVm6X8F_i62VRW4TPMoF8oxzN9-CB8jvDK65S6xOx4SL5E/s200/cordy+its+all+about+me.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253554418197485458" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was worried we were going to become invisible.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It has been a long time. And the public clamor…indescribable!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We had to move this to the top of our priority list. Just to avoid another catastrophe, what with Wall Street and the bailout and whatnot.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow> “I just love springtime. Me in bright, spring fashions.” </font color> Cordelia is in high form in this episode. She has so many great one-liners.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This is one of my favorite episodes of all seven seasons.<br /><br /><font color=yellow>“My eyes are hazel, Helen Keller.”</font color><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why does Buffy feel like she has to explain stuff when she doesn’t?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t know. Especially since she’s not very good at it.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Look, actual teaching at school.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> God, I hate it when TV teachers read in class. Am I teaching? Am I acting? Who knows! It’s like they’re either there to be mocked or they’re having a <em>Mr. Holland’s Opus</em> moment. And all in ten seconds or less, because no one’s paying attention. They’re not the star.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like how at Sunnydale they teach right up to the bell.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, the bell always takes them by surprise.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That happen a lot to you at school?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think we’ve had this conversation before. I like Cordelia’s observations, though.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <font color=yellow>With Shylock it’s whine whine whine. Shylock should get over himself. </font color><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’d kill for a student like Cordelia. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Her comments are typical Cordelia, but they’re relevant to the text.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEge0jX2VnhJTPT31Yk3Oj4xCS3W6QY4a2SbjlpGM3GuMaFLPPtOMMPa6m4DQOwpvKFXi5aZpSIm3MwYNavvKjPW9HpM7IcV4-oAPR_ZPmkIp6rQDKaWEwuCbQbEzSdC5JFnkZo1usil1iU/s1600-h/bat.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEge0jX2VnhJTPT31Yk3Oj4xCS3W6QY4a2SbjlpGM3GuMaFLPPtOMMPa6m4DQOwpvKFXi5aZpSIm3MwYNavvKjPW9HpM7IcV4-oAPR_ZPmkIp6rQDKaWEwuCbQbEzSdC5JFnkZo1usil1iU/s200/bat.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253554916453236866" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow> “Mitch is going to die.” </font color> It took about .3 seconds for me to appreciate the verbal irony in that statement.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m glad to see we’re now in the boy’s locker room watching a boy getting attacked.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> By an invisible female assailant, no less. Total inversion of the convention.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Plus the shot of the baseball bat was scary.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Scary because it was phallic? <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs5C5G5i_4OQBUOpE5mHbFB2NcDuKBNTqLzcgYpuNkEBj97ilo1MYM4gZ9v0aDjSNw49O5CISryprUrOuA4i5ALfELhAsy7P1JAUI9wgmzNXF-pCIrACcyV7Hh1WUwXxjp4EpJx58EuHg/s1600-h/willow+in+lockerroom.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs5C5G5i_4OQBUOpE5mHbFB2NcDuKBNTqLzcgYpuNkEBj97ilo1MYM4gZ9v0aDjSNw49O5CISryprUrOuA4i5ALfELhAsy7P1JAUI9wgmzNXF-pCIrACcyV7Hh1WUwXxjp4EpJx58EuHg/s320/willow+in+lockerroom.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253555875888991970" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No, because they did it from the POV of the victim. It’s a scary thought to be hit with a baseball bat.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Her knife from later on is phallic, too. Why are you making that face?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think we’re in love with the word <em>phallic</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And by we you mean me?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Uh huh.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s pretty good at yielding that bat…why didn’t she just join the softball team? Oh wait, she’s invisible.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Think of all the bases she could steal if she were invisible.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cubs have been playing like they were invisible.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They need Marcie.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They probably do. She could replace Lee in the three-spot.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>A Beating</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Who campaigns like that for May Queen?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia could be that Flick chick from <em>Election</em>. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Back to my question. Who campaigns like that for May Queen?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Bribery is a time-honored political maneuver. I think she’ll do well in Congress.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWp2O68hNXwC9ZUVIJpnb7PbwkpYXMqka2-5-Y_3WX8V7k4BN_znTAtJLgpBDIjN1UB-S57YpcUDJ2KkLu6S-CmvDQD-nRC6NplCLSyQbI5ILrhWwU6sKX18n_xbTOTsBswWWLv0I1mf8/s1600-h/cordy+candy.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWp2O68hNXwC9ZUVIJpnb7PbwkpYXMqka2-5-Y_3WX8V7k4BN_znTAtJLgpBDIjN1UB-S57YpcUDJ2KkLu6S-CmvDQD-nRC6NplCLSyQbI5ILrhWwU6sKX18n_xbTOTsBswWWLv0I1mf8/s200/cordy+candy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253558159780362770" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>There are no dead students here…this week. </font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Great line. I love that line. You have to feel sorry for Principal Snyder, though. It’s at least one casualty a week.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s like <em>Roadhouse</em>. It was a good night. Nobody died. You never saw <em>Road House</em>? With Patrick Swayze?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <a href="http://www.netflix.com"><strong>NETFLIX!</strong></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia doesn’t need the loony fringe vote.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s just that strong a candidate. If she were campaigning this season, she wouldn’t come to our state. She doesn’t need the loony fringe vote.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least Mitch can give an accurate depiction of the assault. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Most Sunnyvale residents are really bad at that.<br />They usually make up some crap.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like, I must have been imagining it. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or, I stabbed myself with a BBQ fork in the neck.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Principal Snyder, unlike Flutie, doesn’t allow Buffy into the crime scenes? WTF! What kind of school has this become?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Indeed, the terrorists have finally won.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>Invisible Assailant</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNqW4ktn2BX48K1mWmEyPF-aiiRsKcV6wI_L35kEnNzpHiwcXFcXO0boBF_IQmre5JvFVGH403ghOxuYR14tTSLQw4VH_xyrsR2oM9KN2PHNG7YveYvIp6cVO-vJ8QrlvB1wfPL-mzEGE/s1600-h/harmony+down+the+staiars.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNqW4ktn2BX48K1mWmEyPF-aiiRsKcV6wI_L35kEnNzpHiwcXFcXO0boBF_IQmre5JvFVGH403ghOxuYR14tTSLQw4VH_xyrsR2oM9KN2PHNG7YveYvIp6cVO-vJ8QrlvB1wfPL-mzEGE/s200/harmony+down+the+staiars.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253559165899485698" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Are those cherries on Buffy’s skirt? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t notice. I was too busy watching Harmony bounce down the stairs. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Harmony sure knows how to take a fall, that’s for sure.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> True. She made it through with just a bum ankle. But she deserved it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like how Skinner handled the emergency. <font color=yellow> “You! School nurse. Now!” </font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What was he supposed to do?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Exactly what he did. Pick one person and direct them. Not any of this “somebody go get the nurse crap.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s creepy when she gets to the top of the stairs and hears the girl laughing.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Disembodied laughter is always creepy. Disembodied anything is usually creepy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Disembodied heavy breathing is creepy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Disembodied throat clearing is not creepy, but still strange.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Disembodied nose blowing really gets me.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>Maybe it’s a vampire bat? </font color>…even a blind squirrel can find a nut sometimes. Good one, Xander.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Look at all those band trophies in the band room. Their band rocks.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s a spooky band room. I guess my high school would have the spooky Ag room.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Really, the Ag room is spooky?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, we didn’t have much of a band.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>A Good Vampire</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you see the shot of the FBI guys?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, who are the suits outside the school? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s cool not knowing that’s important later. The second time you see it, you recall that’s important later.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There are few <em>non sequiturs</em> in Joss Whedon’s world.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKmgGT_FmKC_gj2VGx90cag7NIatsaT6jnOakZEWg895OQ9x7SFSUTddfbKqGvi1CdAOa0_m9h7Xlmivcx17G4ilv9Y44oeEdMeL7DFQ0t_QI8wTMo8k-H5hpZNv-EXjoAhByCmNWPsIc/s1600-h/xander+skateboard.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKmgGT_FmKC_gj2VGx90cag7NIatsaT6jnOakZEWg895OQ9x7SFSUTddfbKqGvi1CdAOa0_m9h7Xlmivcx17G4ilv9Y44oeEdMeL7DFQ0t_QI8wTMo8k-H5hpZNv-EXjoAhByCmNWPsIc/s200/xander+skateboard.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253560152480434114" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you notice Willow is wearing a <em>Scooby-Doo</em> t-shirt? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No, I missed that! We’re going to have to watch this episode again.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think it’s the first reference to the Scoobies. And did you notice that Xander has his skateboard! Did you see it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What the hell? I’m starting the episode over.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXDCtV9kC9V_X2T1f0CmnXYvzGeAvt3t-8K_jhMHHNI9FlqowjK8IXqSJyCFtq0pglM6tdXch336TGSW3xARJZr_OgzQnC8oIccq4q35HAxJ4FCBVcuzaKe7lZhYK_3-jc1EX1LM8Porc/s1600-h/no+reflection.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXDCtV9kC9V_X2T1f0CmnXYvzGeAvt3t-8K_jhMHHNI9FlqowjK8IXqSJyCFtq0pglM6tdXch336TGSW3xARJZr_OgzQnC8oIccq4q35HAxJ4FCBVcuzaKe7lZhYK_3-jc1EX1LM8Porc/s200/no+reflection.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253561626768803202" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I forgot that Giles has not met Angel until this scene.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like how Giles does a double take on the glass, just to make sure we caught it. Then he says, “a vampire casts no reflection,” just to make sure we caught it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But it’s creepy! He’s casting no reflection, and Angel’s able to sneak up on him. Didn’t you jump?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No. I was thinking about the doubletake. All it needed was a slide whistle.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow> “A vampire in love with a slayer. How poetic, in a maudlin sort of way.” </font color> I love it when Giles brings out the heavy-hitting adjectives. He’s awesome.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s a reader with a great vocabulary.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was wondering if the library could order the <em>Tiberius Manifesto</em> through Interlibrary loan.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx6HT0gpAflGnN9emE94xR0_dbrkJt4Nacpaq0eVGbcuesvqE6rQQy0_0cira8_cDMNQprVZHA50MAiwtI_0fw0gTcm5dOCJWfN9LkDqKmun0UyKrKoNbvG2ERFcO7rbi8cxre9S1Rb3g/s1600-h/pergamom.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx6HT0gpAflGnN9emE94xR0_dbrkJt4Nacpaq0eVGbcuesvqE6rQQy0_0cira8_cDMNQprVZHA50MAiwtI_0fw0gTcm5dOCJWfN9LkDqKmun0UyKrKoNbvG2ERFcO7rbi8cxre9S1Rb3g/s200/pergamom.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253564025208404498" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sure, sweetie. ILF has Interlibrary loan so screwed up it may actually show up at our library. I have a copy of the <em>Pergamum Codex</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s saying something. There were over 200,000 volumes there. How about the <em>Legends of Vishnu?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sorry, we don’t deal in scrolls.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>On Being Invisible</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Poor girl, I feel sorry for her. I was teased by the popular kids in high school, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She should realize that maybe her toupee joke just wasn’t funny.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordelia says it two minutes later and they all laugh!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s all in the delivery. Ask me, “What’s the secret of comedy?”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What’s the—<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Timing!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcNkx540JtCb-zS8dEyjZvIh6R9vktjL4cLjH6ZivjGALvKWDh-p7Dw_vW_MVrBwOpYiDKYUFHfrPiW6fOJlWMbfV92aKF6VzmwiD_DstNkf-bi6prV8DPG_KEZckm2j1CKWwjJOTSVj4/s1600-h/may+queen+speech.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcNkx540JtCb-zS8dEyjZvIh6R9vktjL4cLjH6ZivjGALvKWDh-p7Dw_vW_MVrBwOpYiDKYUFHfrPiW6fOJlWMbfV92aKF6VzmwiD_DstNkf-bi6prV8DPG_KEZckm2j1CKWwjJOTSVj4/s200/may+queen+speech.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253564782362688178" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia’s May Queen speech in the quad…I like how she keeps talking in the background during the principals talk. She’s back there ranting like Mussolini.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She does go on a bit long. I like Buffy’s outfit. The up-do.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The blue thing around her neck—what do you call that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> A choker.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Are you serious?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m serious. Not a grab-your-dong choker, a neck choker.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I thought it was a sweatband. But I’d like to hear more about this “grab-your-dong choker” you speak of.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <strong>I don’t want to talk about your dong.</strong><br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>Perceived Reality</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIqyPQwWmRv5Xi7MgpLdJxsxHnYokLchITe4-jpZNX4pUXlalhT1KTxyk3kNjscDsJXhKY0IzteTbRJeXT36tDtOQ524lVoPklFrEM93fn7x4vUPnWwgUdWxjXUQaedmpAua9IF4dTwmI/s1600-h/big+stomper.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIqyPQwWmRv5Xi7MgpLdJxsxHnYokLchITe4-jpZNX4pUXlalhT1KTxyk3kNjscDsJXhKY0IzteTbRJeXT36tDtOQ524lVoPklFrEM93fn7x4vUPnWwgUdWxjXUQaedmpAua9IF4dTwmI/s200/big+stomper.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253565206069919554" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dude! look at the size of that stomper! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s got big feet. Was that a combat boot tread?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sure looked like it. <em>Dang!</em><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFkWStcW4z1AOGhec_qetRXSM9Fbd6m_EEsqshDREhGTvU-C3rrUWlw_NW1llj4BpL4-mycNrSZvXgBvj-QINu5t1JgS_1J5-UAH3zvpTUeEVIC0mPROlXrWtusYNIlZDN7h3zEquq9pc/s1600-h/messy+ghost+flute.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFkWStcW4z1AOGhec_qetRXSM9Fbd6m_EEsqshDREhGTvU-C3rrUWlw_NW1llj4BpL4-mycNrSZvXgBvj-QINu5t1JgS_1J5-UAH3zvpTUeEVIC0mPROlXrWtusYNIlZDN7h3zEquq9pc/s200/messy+ghost+flute.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253565616477710466" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ghost Flute doesn’t put her crap away. Look, just because you’re invisible, doesn’t mean your crap is, too.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’d like to point out that yet someone else sneaks up on Buffy. She even pulls a knife and Buffy doesn’t notice.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But does this really count? She didn’t touch the shoulder, and Buffy didn’t yelp.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How close does she need to be before Buffy notices her? She needs to breathe, right? And those big clompers of hers have to make some noise.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No! Don’t kill the English teacher! What did Ms. Miller do, other than overact Shakespeare? Like that hasn’t been done before. We just don’t get many English teachers on this show.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I guess the point was to scare Cordelia some more by attacking the English teacher?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m sorry, Joss. That’s just going too far. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I could never imagine harm coming to an English teacher.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, leave them alone.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>Cordelia</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They introduce a quantum mechanical component to the show here. Not just witches and demons anymore.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles hates overlooking stuff. I mean, fist-pound-on-the-table hates. But I think in this case he should forgive himself.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXm9J-bb2x1vhdiRCKwzLa3Hmeis6Y3aaFQs1Ag-Dega2U2Ty-IXTO0b3dec058OdB1kbkxVBQwjA_WQqi3M8aX_WCBEcg79j4KueX4ZSlCsoV8PvpFNfepUYdddbmv5RFmLoDKyRo4Eg/s1600-h/going+invis.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXm9J-bb2x1vhdiRCKwzLa3Hmeis6Y3aaFQs1Ag-Dega2U2Ty-IXTO0b3dec058OdB1kbkxVBQwjA_WQqi3M8aX_WCBEcg79j4KueX4ZSlCsoV8PvpFNfepUYdddbmv5RFmLoDKyRo4Eg/s200/going+invis.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253566720624729282" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ms. Miller is a crappy-ass teacher. Doesn’t call on Marcie Ross. Doesn’t even notice when she turns invisible in front of her.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, what’s with that? Wouldn’t she notice that the girl is gone?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> An all-time great line from Cordelia: <font color=yellow> “This is all about me…Me, me, me!” </font color><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And me!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>And me!</em><br /><br /><font color=yellow> “I don’t recall seeing you here before.”<br />“Oh no. I have a life.” </font color><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia says she was kind of hoping Buffy was in a gang. I think, added to Willow’s shirt, this might be another early reference to the Scoobie Gang.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So we have two references in one episode?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Proto-references, maybe.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t understand why they are crowning the May Queen at the Bronze.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s a school event. Wouldn’t they be doing that at school?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe the gymnasium wasn’t available.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Have they had anything horrible happen in the gymnasium lately? Cleaning up murders is an ordeal. Sometimes you can’t get the stains out.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You would have to rewax the floor. That takes forever, and it’s expensive. But it doesn’t explain why Cordelia is getting ready for it at the school.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’d think she’d go home.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love that Cordelia gets a chance at another dimension in this scene.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She actually has a non-shallow moment here… <font color=yellow> “working at being popular beats being lonely by yourself.” </font color> <br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>Follow the Music</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia’s going to change in the mop closet. Aw, they cut away! Come on!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> ...<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think Marcie’s loony because she sounds terrible. She needs lessons.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Man, this high school is <em>cavernous</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’ve got to love the craftiness of Marcie. She divided and conquered.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOulWni818F1ZVjv80ROcqnRCzupcq3cGoot7_11sX6hOArjtPeueIupIP9qGKlIMaAkTLapy5jcVv1hwG_pjK8FZ-4yGXfD8i2T_doEBSatl-8jcLFeg6DCpkIfYtEkq7p4NJi8wVRUI/s1600-h/up+buffy+goes.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOulWni818F1ZVjv80ROcqnRCzupcq3cGoot7_11sX6hOArjtPeueIupIP9qGKlIMaAkTLapy5jcVv1hwG_pjK8FZ-4yGXfD8i2T_doEBSatl-8jcLFeg6DCpkIfYtEkq7p4NJi8wVRUI/s200/up+buffy+goes.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253568094030062626" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy can’t reach up and grab Cordelia? When she was able to jump over the gate in a single bound?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, why did she have to flip over the pipe on the way up? I bet she could have jumped up.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Floaty syringe, floaty syringe.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Marcie is diabolical. She’s like a serial killer.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Where’d she get the black medical bag? Hannibal Lecter Tech?<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>At the Bronze</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How did Marcie get across town? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> With two bodies.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Does she have an invisible car that got ignored by the mechanic?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Good catch. I didn’t think about that at all.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It would have been so much easier to have it all at the gym.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Easier on Marcie. Poor girl’s already stressed with being insane and everything.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNM388gFigG4ZV2rHF_zRMPL5kR4gC_4p5BtDeDlLryMiR6EUoW_qKyLMzE839Y8E0tugqlTLRQqNFyfMBWsivbz8fa5vf4RmhidQTY13PFCi7mc0-8WghFJ2DulSyyLo8BtwYR6JBEFw/s1600-h/learn.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNM388gFigG4ZV2rHF_zRMPL5kR4gC_4p5BtDeDlLryMiR6EUoW_qKyLMzE839Y8E0tugqlTLRQqNFyfMBWsivbz8fa5vf4RmhidQTY13PFCi7mc0-8WghFJ2DulSyyLo8BtwYR6JBEFw/s200/learn.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253569673220796802" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow> “You’re not the student; you’re the lesson.” </font color> That is an ominous line.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I guess the "learn" design on the curtain was for Buffy’s benefit?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It really wasn’t well-thought out. Buffy never saw the “listen” sign at the classroom, did she?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And Cordelia never saw the "look."<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> All I know is that I don’t think Marcie’s qualified to do plastic surgery.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>Rescue</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIiBeZrFSVJ2xY7murChDCAHhweyuOxpIk8V5BSP8l9aaidyNoKM8w25yBRdoDYaqsyXYGncGf1K3XUyDkEv4vxqYZ5ncfSXs78wf9i9PCpVp2C2rhzYkMsNRiIJ-TezEAYHNcyjvrtIg/s1600-h/angel+rescues+scoobs.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIiBeZrFSVJ2xY7murChDCAHhweyuOxpIk8V5BSP8l9aaidyNoKM8w25yBRdoDYaqsyXYGncGf1K3XUyDkEv4vxqYZ5ncfSXs78wf9i9PCpVp2C2rhzYkMsNRiIJ-TezEAYHNcyjvrtIg/s200/angel+rescues+scoobs.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253570502120597522" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How did Angel know to come rescue the Scoobies?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He explains later that he smelled the gas when he brought the Codex. Why didn’t he have them thank him?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I want to know where he got the Codex.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>Interlibrary loan, duh. <br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>Listening</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcOp1ZyT1D5fStD1F08oDow5_YoOKPz91id8kJ0BWmdqI-mJyfL97m7RWyU-0MKrl3b2eswOH2L_tEREeSvyb-wDuhvgzRqipnW9TZgmmlqQ7kUzOR9GqYARIfYOELP1HowK3yzwl7Xq4/s1600-h/jedi+buffy.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcOp1ZyT1D5fStD1F08oDow5_YoOKPz91id8kJ0BWmdqI-mJyfL97m7RWyU-0MKrl3b2eswOH2L_tEREeSvyb-wDuhvgzRqipnW9TZgmmlqQ7kUzOR9GqYARIfYOELP1HowK3yzwl7Xq4/s200/jedi+buffy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253571133464047218" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s great when Buffy uses her Jedi powers to fight Marcie.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> By Jedi powers, you mean listen for the noisy boots?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, that snuck up on her earlier when no one was around.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYklgJ0m4QvVg9zvZkvkvq_dZI-RcXYBl52d7v9MzMbs5shSIekjLoomwMRnWDyI_DHKrCHgSet1fmJgyIEcxBDJsF2yT25KOrXauCf3s5l31R17hmfTGbCkKY0bMJhwDgshyphenhyphenP-Rl21rg/s1600-h/fbi+guys.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYklgJ0m4QvVg9zvZkvkvq_dZI-RcXYBl52d7v9MzMbs5shSIekjLoomwMRnWDyI_DHKrCHgSet1fmJgyIEcxBDJsF2yT25KOrXauCf3s5l31R17hmfTGbCkKY0bMJhwDgshyphenhyphenP-Rl21rg/s200/fbi+guys.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253571550767905858" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So these suits are creepy? No, that dude’s tie is creepy<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I missed the tie. What was creepy about it?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The one on the left was all <em>Men in Black</em>, while the one of the right was MIB with a splash of <em>Walk the Line</em>. Which was the tie.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>Appreciation</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why does Giles lie about Angel saving them?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t get it either. Does Giles feel threatened? Is he trying to protect Buffy?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe that’s it, since he pretty much calls Angel out for being in love with Buffy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Right now he thinks he's invisible to her. Just like Marcie was. And Angel is to mirrors and shiny surfaces.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ooh, deep.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlRWHwhyphenhyphenudFDZJzYUA4Dtg9EwdJYmwAgvhOY0tZyLM71f9tfTylmXPSdZNA6WcI1X_QkjdpMdguPpQuMG5Pze-Z_-lFGJJFUPGCoH564aOlew3uRJ_cuboQBAgG7ufOKgKOJP-9yCmoGg/s1600-h/peep+show+shirt.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlRWHwhyphenhyphenudFDZJzYUA4Dtg9EwdJYmwAgvhOY0tZyLM71f9tfTylmXPSdZNA6WcI1X_QkjdpMdguPpQuMG5Pze-Z_-lFGJJFUPGCoH564aOlew3uRJ_cuboQBAgG7ufOKgKOJP-9yCmoGg/s200/peep+show+shirt.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253572433839466738" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like Xander’s peep show shirt.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I missed it. I have to watch this episode again.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I guess that’s a car on Buffy’s shirt. I’m really surprised you’re missing these details.<br /><br /></hr><br /><h3>At the FBI</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Meanwhile, at the Initiative…<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih9Nd-8FCYiayTiL65dly0p1naGtkaosgOlmigwbb50xYe5r623dyMgBP5o32qcLBHwEdnAuJW4HXuVI3ZKThNK-4bE4rpY61ZLqErHlvtv6l62gUqBX9pJ6JEdb3rE53PmcrfiUw4HNM/s1600-h/kill+tech.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih9Nd-8FCYiayTiL65dly0p1naGtkaosgOlmigwbb50xYe5r623dyMgBP5o32qcLBHwEdnAuJW4HXuVI3ZKThNK-4bE4rpY61ZLqErHlvtv6l62gUqBX9pJ6JEdb3rE53PmcrfiUw4HNM/s200/kill+tech.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253572933677020978" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How does Marcie get into a chair without sitting on somebody?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There’s this great scene from an <em>X-Files</em> episode that deals with the problems of being invisible. You’d always be tripping over stuff, because you can’t judge your distance from things. This guy was running along, and tripped over a bunch of crap in the front yard.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cause he didn’t know where his feet were?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Exactly. On the other hand, it would be pretty cool to go commando all the time.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Wouldn’t you get cold?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You just wear clothes when you want to. Sounds awesome to me.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieMI2_If5XwwSaqgE5jkjL7HiXjmvkOdIehenqmJSb0g7uzkI6ZGcs7Sq2Y7Ns4YCRyK1OFYLVidWFZ-mrIJ38aQ6siDMyP3wbOH6DAtW5YmrnIhCnxhCghXWMCAF2IIgNlm9TKEVn8hg/s1600-h/ass+text.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieMI2_If5XwwSaqgE5jkjL7HiXjmvkOdIehenqmJSb0g7uzkI6ZGcs7Sq2Y7Ns4YCRyK1OFYLVidWFZ-mrIJ38aQ6siDMyP3wbOH6DAtW5YmrnIhCnxhCghXWMCAF2IIgNlm9TKEVn8hg/s200/ass+text.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5253573296993124226" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> An Assasination and Infiltration textbook. The text is baffling.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s from “Happiness Is a Warm Gun” from the Beatles’ <em>White Album</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t get the reference.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe this will help.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5EDm3vkfRzo&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5EDm3vkfRzo&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So, did that help?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m afraid it didn’t. Now I’m more confused than ever.<br /><br />Coming Up: Season One's Season Finale, <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/search/label/Prophecy%20Girl"><font color=yellow>"Prophecy Girl"</font color></a>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-75764079784367408552008-09-21T14:48:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:32:37.552-07:00Nightmares“Nightmares”<br />9/20/08<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE</font color> is back from Boston and better than ever! In this episode, we learn what the characters' worst fears are, we learn about logical fallacies, and we see something so awful one would expect to see it riding in on one of the horses of the Apocalypse.<br /><br /><h3>A New Kid? </h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-YCV8WGIOZCrAisYUlTapfE8AuRPcxyV4z_e_r-59lxRbSxMtcc7aaiBnAzCue099TQGtJHoNZ2krDu9hbPYhQYOG10kQdVnjtXeEScdalIBurjGJ_a2Of383NiOWTSrqBvhprt06FEM/s1600-h/Master+of+Candles.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-YCV8WGIOZCrAisYUlTapfE8AuRPcxyV4z_e_r-59lxRbSxMtcc7aaiBnAzCue099TQGtJHoNZ2krDu9hbPYhQYOG10kQdVnjtXeEScdalIBurjGJ_a2Of383NiOWTSrqBvhprt06FEM/s200/Master+of+Candles.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248598247937748850" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here we are at the master’s lair again. It looks like someone went a little crazy at Bed, Bath, and Beyond.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s a very romantic setting<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> In a paedophilic sort of way.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> For all her terror, I like the pigtails.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Those were French braids, not pigtails.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> For all her terror, I like the French braids. Do you know how to do those.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I have to admit that I don’t.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Don’t worry about it. I’ll look it up on the interweb. You can find everything <a href="http://www.dreamweaverbraiding.com/braids/classic.htm">there</a>.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhgtA4nn2cOr59mcih4MbFrYzugSuVU27bNmoDUDDMBbILL4051ThWdJig92Xpus6ZAGKoNkiuSouf-AnEkl3o75BUxXtAcvkCF8ELqSqltxA5ez2DRuazV2Eb2I0i7WAuuWEjnxsmL74/s1600-h/kinky.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhgtA4nn2cOr59mcih4MbFrYzugSuVU27bNmoDUDDMBbILL4051ThWdJig92Xpus6ZAGKoNkiuSouf-AnEkl3o75BUxXtAcvkCF8ELqSqltxA5ez2DRuazV2Eb2I0i7WAuuWEjnxsmL74/s200/kinky.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248598827391908626" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sleeping on that pillow like that is going to give her a kink in her neck.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s what I thought. I wonder how often she has nightmares, living on the hellmouth and being prone to having visions anyway.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe she has a slayer antihistamine to keep the nightmares away. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like Nightmare-B-Gone?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you see the magical locker in this scene? It’s open, it’s shut…it’s open again!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was too busy being angry with all the people who kept walking through the shot.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It should be more like Bayside High. No one ever walked through Zack or A.C’s shot.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_LlcIywTsnpYt_DFWkO7mFG3HY25Tvg0BNpfRkzwG0YMyfX8pbsqulf9rRpPnzjrGyIOPU58RRFDrEPGBSnfcH1Q60dAAbTURMHkf_rn5VfPHAdEjQA3cqgcVSdO5IgX7wCkV2o_jKtc/s1600-h/amy+jo+johnson+37.gif"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_LlcIywTsnpYt_DFWkO7mFG3HY25Tvg0BNpfRkzwG0YMyfX8pbsqulf9rRpPnzjrGyIOPU58RRFDrEPGBSnfcH1Q60dAAbTURMHkf_rn5VfPHAdEjQA3cqgcVSdO5IgX7wCkV2o_jKtc/s200/amy+jo+johnson+37.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248601074347758898" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Wendell looks like Tommy from the Power Rangers. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t know who that is.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know who the Pink Ranger is. Rowr!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Wasn’t her name Kimberly?<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfLU19BVK0_tpOw3ZIAHYFrBDc9mCnlQOQXz2lHCHbQs_LqbDyEJFIkBdQE6LYHiJy37Jg_G9gyHWW8Y8gRr0UVQivoatWa_EubvGkgb_4lJWWGyzFB0YsaCb9TzKkZbqMe6lufQPkNic/s1600-h/tommy.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfLU19BVK0_tpOw3ZIAHYFrBDc9mCnlQOQXz2lHCHbQs_LqbDyEJFIkBdQE6LYHiJy37Jg_G9gyHWW8Y8gRr0UVQivoatWa_EubvGkgb_4lJWWGyzFB0YsaCb9TzKkZbqMe6lufQPkNic/s200/tommy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248602677719403858" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, please. Looks like a trip to Wikipedia is in your future. Did you know she's 37 this year?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don't care.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Her real name is Amy Jo Johnson.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Still don't care.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A New Force</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The Master loves to give speeches. Is this where Buffy gets it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> His lectures seem a little silly. When you’re evil, you don’t really need a handbook. And the kid who’s the master’s prodigy looked an awful lot like the kid who shows up in the story.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s what I thought at first. Very confusing. You have Billy the astral projector, Billy the coma patient…way too many 12 year-olds in this episode.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Joyce seems to have handled the divorce rather well! A very amicable parting with no harsh words for her ex.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Totally unrealistic.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not even a dig. No one’s that magnanimous, not even dopey Mrs. Summers.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidx1mqsB6OklQc6mpvSoPr1gjv4MPzrQOSraU2SW_XmDS_oxWwxa5pyo-91DgeZrZOwEsJEYly0YDlxgp9ROHCf0eZnTmZfhuMe117UZ1b-1tsYpghJbh2DMw7cv5EV80wZ6hTr5wD8Wo/s1600-h/ugly+ass+shirt.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidx1mqsB6OklQc6mpvSoPr1gjv4MPzrQOSraU2SW_XmDS_oxWwxa5pyo-91DgeZrZOwEsJEYly0YDlxgp9ROHCf0eZnTmZfhuMe117UZ1b-1tsYpghJbh2DMw7cv5EV80wZ6hTr5wD8Wo/s200/ugly+ass+shirt.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248603853805766370" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m waiting to talk about Xander’s shirt. As soon as he showed up in that shirt, I forgot about everything else. Horrible.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s like he lost a fight to a 70’s shower curtain<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hold up, what’s this? Giles is acting rather dodgy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What was Giles doing back there? Hmm?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I didn’t realize there was a back room on the second floor.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Wendell</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I agree with this guy. Why does everyone make the mistake of calling spiders insects?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I knew that about the arachnids.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Do you know the Greek myth behind the name <em>arachnid</em>.?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_6Tig9GbgammMZwHX1_oqCz8-RXv77LZkmgQVpWrjag2fdNkgpEOMCuWnKlyptRCdfBseqLzMJit2TxA8Y-5cZ8bHdzvzEHEngOyZRClh30qQQmqL_0Aeon130yFnU_lQ-O1M_kv6Bqo/s1600-h/arachne.gif"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_6Tig9GbgammMZwHX1_oqCz8-RXv77LZkmgQVpWrjag2fdNkgpEOMCuWnKlyptRCdfBseqLzMJit2TxA8Y-5cZ8bHdzvzEHEngOyZRClh30qQQmqL_0Aeon130yFnU_lQ-O1M_kv6Bqo/s200/arachne.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248605185709713986" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s interesting. Arachnea was this girl who thought she was the best weaver ever, even better than Athena, who was goddess of the loom. Athena tried to warn her, but Arachnea insisted on a contest. In this contest, Athena wove the constellations, and then turned Arachnea into a spider.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Who weaves webs.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yup.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy needs to check her assignments when she misses school.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She looks like my boyfriend when he takes a test. The test is usually about anniversaries and birthdays.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A History Test</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitF7BnEXpTwJP_51jJDx9h9TCMqnisbeFCsk5iSKmfvqtP6CRa99dL2z42MIcBhyt4eLQlpMQFmStA98jnlOINJ8Xfftl4ZeoNMPu5e92b-BdstGPr2bq1KrkbO7dhrpSpTzENS7iJ1Zo/s1600-h/keach+test.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitF7BnEXpTwJP_51jJDx9h9TCMqnisbeFCsk5iSKmfvqtP6CRa99dL2z42MIcBhyt4eLQlpMQFmStA98jnlOINJ8Xfftl4ZeoNMPu5e92b-BdstGPr2bq1KrkbO7dhrpSpTzENS7iJ1Zo/s200/keach+test.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248606077351725858" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why is Stacey Keach proctoring this test?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Who’s Stacey Keach?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know Mike Hammer? Mickey Spillaine? <em>I the Jury</em>?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Seward’s Folly? Harry Truman? Pretty broad range of history for this test.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Were you reading the questions?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, yeah. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I missed it. I was too busy trying to type clever things<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> We should hear some of those.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Laura is Attacked</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6RRMy0QummJveew9XmT9RBv4YdJhaujNVKmIiy9tuRmMrSlEZVW0oDkg7nyjqNUTLSA0L4R-atI8_W_m5Mwzmz0CeJd0mtTmBwwodb9M81TLYFt8Fe5PyMYf3zcynaLbZCDadC5dcDQE/s1600-h/smoking+kills.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6RRMy0QummJveew9XmT9RBv4YdJhaujNVKmIiy9tuRmMrSlEZVW0oDkg7nyjqNUTLSA0L4R-atI8_W_m5Mwzmz0CeJd0mtTmBwwodb9M81TLYFt8Fe5PyMYf3zcynaLbZCDadC5dcDQE/s200/smoking+kills.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248607172526568002" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Smoking Kills! Apparently the administration felt the janitors needed to get the message.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> At least this person is scared by a real monster.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not one she made up in her head.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK2iOfdmNbLKVt_m5Y4fxtzHZ92atj5IeHYRoS8V6GW-uobD1DQuoY7DbI0D3uEvVGWD_-6cBvkHWEnE5X5gxd0lwVXsDl91sVuYlTRpfZgIkFFVTMdZnFGFdjm51TOdpixi529IpDi6I/s1600-h/lucky+19+monster.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK2iOfdmNbLKVt_m5Y4fxtzHZ92atj5IeHYRoS8V6GW-uobD1DQuoY7DbI0D3uEvVGWD_-6cBvkHWEnE5X5gxd0lwVXsDl91sVuYlTRpfZgIkFFVTMdZnFGFdjm51TOdpixi529IpDi6I/s200/lucky+19+monster.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248606698817493154" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Bad Dreams Come True</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEPHJ5DWNWEKVb2Cr_p-9ByVcrunDJlxnhqACQGIx1aNW2vwD2pV8dJGMYtCdKVewPTf_y02Q-pU39g5kkHvsbL8FJMnQOw-kQKekLiVxyutBbPYS2BluF0ituNHU2zPcTQSKYVReMwa0/s1600-h/nerf+herder.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEPHJ5DWNWEKVb2Cr_p-9ByVcrunDJlxnhqACQGIx1aNW2vwD2pV8dJGMYtCdKVewPTf_y02Q-pU39g5kkHvsbL8FJMnQOw-kQKekLiVxyutBbPYS2BluF0ituNHU2zPcTQSKYVReMwa0/s200/nerf+herder.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248608211791197314" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles is scared of being a big dummy. I wish more people in this world were afraid of being a big dummy. Right, sweetie?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like the 30% who would vote for a atheist child molester as long as he was a Republican?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, those kinds of big dummies.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a Nerf Herder sticker in Willow’s locker. Did you see that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope, I missed it, Eagle Eye.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A little shout out to the theme song people.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander shrieks like a girl when he walks into the classroom in his boxers.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s a classic. Someone’s got to be naked in front of a classroom.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBOh0l4ywXSVgo3exQU0TUnJrFstY45Yh_r4lKnnCz9obNTEonhzZ3O81mm-pXgzeXKus1FW9DQOHNxidDXmPWwmlshO554fdrYuoNFtlIGbTA3TfP4AI9mZlarb69dE20ZlGnuj6kTM4/s1600-h/xander+boxers.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBOh0l4ywXSVgo3exQU0TUnJrFstY45Yh_r4lKnnCz9obNTEonhzZ3O81mm-pXgzeXKus1FW9DQOHNxidDXmPWwmlshO554fdrYuoNFtlIGbTA3TfP4AI9mZlarb69dE20ZlGnuj6kTM4/s200/xander+boxers.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248608459025611954" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why did it have to be Xander, though? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <strong>Nightmares walk among us.</strong><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Makes me think of Illyria. Good times.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> ‘Cause she showed up in her underwear?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, because she has practically the same line in <em>Angel</em>, Season 5.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy’s dad is so nice about rejecting her. Who could really be mad at him?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Summers is so cruel here…it’s delicious.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The worst kind of mean is smiling, personable, and pleasant-voiced.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <font color=yellow>“You’re not nearly as bright as I thought you were going to be.”</font color> I love that line.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ouch.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_GsaRBqT8lDe85fk7NmypQw4A8w3aPHNv6-Hkz04crrfYpyoboOy6nlH_UDP1UEHyMXZq8KhGlKuiBchtFwlYDBZSvAjRNvqzWf_4T1SWJXOO02IdQcMZ-WMcIj6lawCS0Zu1RuFjulk/s1600-h/mr+summers.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_GsaRBqT8lDe85fk7NmypQw4A8w3aPHNv6-Hkz04crrfYpyoboOy6nlH_UDP1UEHyMXZq8KhGlKuiBchtFwlYDBZSvAjRNvqzWf_4T1SWJXOO02IdQcMZ-WMcIj6lawCS0Zu1RuFjulk/s200/mr+summers.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248608934362441794" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Coming from a guy who’s probably wearing a hairpiece. My only question is why Summers went back into the school afterwards.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe he had a few illegitimate daughters in there he still needed to reject.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The guy’s a planner.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Willow’s Conclusion</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoY0JyshhtNjDG1qH1sN1OOHTHBKT6XGy98Kahyphenhyphen363du1BDCjqAHF623QMdYvOZowwN71Jurmi0ZS2sIiTcJeZBT6O38cexNYjylSbp5Ry1L4x7xIThkStBm6OXbBQGKsbyr7wZ0_6_hs/s1600-h/cordy+bad+hair.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoY0JyshhtNjDG1qH1sN1OOHTHBKT6XGy98Kahyphenhyphen363du1BDCjqAHF623QMdYvOZowwN71Jurmi0ZS2sIiTcJeZBT6O38cexNYjylSbp5Ry1L4x7xIThkStBm6OXbBQGKsbyr7wZ0_6_hs/s200/cordy+bad+hair.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248610128049680242" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What did happen to Xander’s clothes? Did they go to the Master? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No, ugly shirt showed up at the end. That shirt is my nightmare.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> As horrifying as Cordelia’s Diana Ross hair.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I agree. This is not the first time she's wigged out about her hair. Whedon's hair arc is well-planned.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Holy crap. Is that a rubber duckie barrett? I don't care if you are a demon; that's just taking things way too far.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Asking Billy</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPpQgHGRM4-5EFokc9tTEbE5i-kmhNj4ijBu7eNdwiFBcY3SF0h-PPygG-hvB8Wq8cUMqX-xpaL3Q8aZSu_0E40nYZjO67kLChFNwNOFjBkjGnQdlIlOgjFqYFbXp9NgSOX1AyLKB-CCU/s1600-h/blue+jacket.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPpQgHGRM4-5EFokc9tTEbE5i-kmhNj4ijBu7eNdwiFBcY3SF0h-PPygG-hvB8Wq8cUMqX-xpaL3Q8aZSu_0E40nYZjO67kLChFNwNOFjBkjGnQdlIlOgjFqYFbXp9NgSOX1AyLKB-CCU/s200/blue+jacket.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248611535144817618" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Obligatory fashion question: what do you think about Buffy’s powder blue jacket?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like it. Not one of my very favorites, but you know.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I really don’t.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Ugly Man</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5izu1yQCDcG89rcsZjaRuQW4-Ut8hea_9Qx7PbRntAIGGg_Q-QDpVtfRjoFWWSXYU5cKuIPbz64h7rA8Bbdpo8F3lxhz5tJ4qU3yIaEsZvLotxayGR4RXZxnGUI2FMIhJEq12u7EM3fU/s1600-h/green+leggings.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5izu1yQCDcG89rcsZjaRuQW4-Ut8hea_9Qx7PbRntAIGGg_Q-QDpVtfRjoFWWSXYU5cKuIPbz64h7rA8Bbdpo8F3lxhz5tJ4qU3yIaEsZvLotxayGR4RXZxnGUI2FMIhJEq12u7EM3fU/s200/green+leggings.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248612053638632002" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Faster if you split up…I just hope that Giles doesn’t have to read any signs on the way.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> For all of Willow’s smarts, she doesn’t realize she’s walking into her own nightmare.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow also doesn’t realize the hideousness of those green leggings. <br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Who Died? </h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH08xFXeITUwtpatA65fs3j5vTM3dpjGo_QvDLdXOulONxaJy6lha2JCRRICBwjsVNEk-cNIvdRV6TM5IJQzqqBhpKLwDrGZuqkYHOmpgoJZ0_6val0r92ea4YlTD-PyIMzpmazceTgmc/s1600-h/chocolate.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjH08xFXeITUwtpatA65fs3j5vTM3dpjGo_QvDLdXOulONxaJy6lha2JCRRICBwjsVNEk-cNIvdRV6TM5IJQzqqBhpKLwDrGZuqkYHOmpgoJZ0_6val0r92ea4YlTD-PyIMzpmazceTgmc/s200/chocolate.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248612536887512146" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Swastikas, I get it…Xander’s afraid of Nazis.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You don’t actually see any Nazis. More importantly, why would someone eat chocolate off the ground?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s dream chocolate off the dream ground. Xander follows these candy bars like a Grimm fairy tale.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Billy’s coach is way off the mark here.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They lost because Billy missed the catch? The coach was committing the fallacy of division. It’s when a person reasons that what’s true of the whole must be true of the parts. They lost the game because of mistakes. Billy made a mistake. Therefore, Billy’s mistake cost them the game. The pitcher put those men on base. Why didn’t Billy’s coach put the pitcher in a coma?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sounds more like a confirmation bias. People tend to notice and look for what confirms their beliefs. Probably the coach was disposed to think it was Billy’s fault in any case, so when he dropped the ball, it only confirmed what he was thinking anyway.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Come to think of it, it’s probably a <em>post hoc</em> (<em>ergo propter hoc</em>) fallacy. Mere sequences don’t establish cause. Just because Billy’s botched catch preceded the end of the game, it doesn’t mean that Billy’s error caused the loss.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Either way, E4, Billy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Very nice!<br /><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Facing Your Fears</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Chocolate Hurricane?</em> It sounds like a sick sexual practice.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Eww! Yucky! Did you just get your own joke? Why are you laughing <em>now</em>?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Your reaction.<br /><br /><span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Chocolate Hurricane? It sounds like a sick sexual practice.<br /></span><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Evil clown with a knife! Xander really got the worst of this deal.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> His nightmares were the worst? Are you secretly Xander?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/08/which-buffy-character-are-you.html">a scientific study showed that I am Glorificus</a>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You said he had the worst nightmares. Are you afraid of clowns with knives?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Are you saying you’re <em>not</em> afraid of clowns with knives? The woman who can’t watch <em>It?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, you got me on that one.<br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A dream is a wish your heart makes…so did Disney sue?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Now how are they going to sue the Master? He’s <em>fictional</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was talking about Joss Whedon.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not the last time she’ll have to dig herself out of the ground.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> In Boston, 1 out of 10 people were actually buried alive.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I find that hard to believe.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s where they came up with the phrase ‘graveyard watch.’ Someone had to sit in a graveyard all night, listening for the ringing bells from the buried coffins.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was wondering how long it would take for you to get a Boston reference in.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimSP1lqZAJGSuLh3UhV42pPxrUzEj00XLeeflXax7AvcnLVGW5qLLshJXIoeslXgUh-fzYtDLkZpbW0VMTfHNWRe6BZTiyhkxz-URb7unzOaye-_pn_Ws6bmywlLKF818LTNkclSZYKl0/s1600-h/vamp+buffy.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimSP1lqZAJGSuLh3UhV42pPxrUzEj00XLeeflXax7AvcnLVGW5qLLshJXIoeslXgUh-fzYtDLkZpbW0VMTfHNWRe6BZTiyhkxz-URb7unzOaye-_pn_Ws6bmywlLKF818LTNkclSZYKl0/s200/vamp+buffy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248614318435794194" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy makes a horrible looking vampire.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Actually, I think Vampire Buffy looks kind of hot.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You have problems.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not as cool as Vampire Willow or even Vampire Xander for that matter, but still…<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Waking Billy</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander’s shirt looks horrible. It’s taken over the whole scene.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wish they would have started out with the obvious: try slapping him awake!<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik3GGGndGiQT86qcBnyKw7Wql7dGsOLFL81qQvYMCcxc1dRU3A6wFkT7Aq7ErH01NWWPGBCbPj45QYtZclGWsGHyKb2OqlSugODcEzT6RXijy993qNqWI3WrmjATQOw_jDrffbrTiMD0U/s1600-h/ugly+ass+shirt+2.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik3GGGndGiQT86qcBnyKw7Wql7dGsOLFL81qQvYMCcxc1dRU3A6wFkT7Aq7ErH01NWWPGBCbPj45QYtZclGWsGHyKb2OqlSugODcEzT6RXijy993qNqWI3WrmjATQOw_jDrffbrTiMD0U/s200/ugly+ass+shirt+2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248614718321913074" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Poor Billy. Coach puts him in a coma, and a week later he has to wake up to Xander’s shirt.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Going into a second coma would have been a kindness, but alas, the universe doesn’t work that way.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Billy’s Coach</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUn21vr1GuWmC9Oc3KoZI969xio-yEHu41P-YFZs4Zuzvo-Hfpz1ShQGprQzcuCEHNTeFjtBBEh8yK6o6slDWN6bcFJdUpJiJ-N8a7ABB7qomHesXWbGdKbTr9kvTNPpi323kWcLGoKRY/s1600-h/nightmares+end.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUn21vr1GuWmC9Oc3KoZI969xio-yEHu41P-YFZs4Zuzvo-Hfpz1ShQGprQzcuCEHNTeFjtBBEh8yK6o6slDWN6bcFJdUpJiJ-N8a7ABB7qomHesXWbGdKbTr9kvTNPpi323kWcLGoKRY/s200/nightmares+end.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248615309624954770" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Actually a cheesy ending. Joss doesn’t abuse them, so it’s kind of nice when they happen.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He does in Season 1. Cheese dominated in the endings to “The Pack” with Giles’s “your secret is safe with me,” the “We’re doomed” ending… I disagree. This one had a <em>90210</em> feel to it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh, what do you know? You don’t know anything.<br /><br />Next time: <font color=yellow>“Out of Mind, Out of Sight”</font color><br /><br />BONUS! What bumped Billy Palmer's death off the front page...<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgz4rbvybTCAuNIvOz9cFeDefe4WEvjaskjYyE0icbAjW5oYA8gJqVOiIt8InBTV3QYssnWGyvm8dIg8L8m5zF5E77qEdD5jKNFSYWAWYeglgx3Tl8n5R98E7lk_4YVIFIYFJMNzNBOE8/s1600-h/zambrano+newspaper.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgz4rbvybTCAuNIvOz9cFeDefe4WEvjaskjYyE0icbAjW5oYA8gJqVOiIt8InBTV3QYssnWGyvm8dIg8L8m5zF5E77qEdD5jKNFSYWAWYeglgx3Tl8n5R98E7lk_4YVIFIYFJMNzNBOE8/s320/zambrano+newspaper.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5248615952295896738" /></a>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-90505617543857120252008-09-14T19:19:00.001-07:002008-09-21T16:23:59.742-07:00Another Jones-Cutler Joint<FONT color=red>He</FONT> is at home. <FONT color=purple>She</FONT> is in Boston. They are on <STRONG>hiatus</STRONG> for this week. Here's a new video by mavens Susie Jones and Bob Cutler. Come back for the last two episodes Thursday and this weekend!<br /><br /><OBJECT class=BLOG_video_class id=BLOG_video-901158decf0c26e2 height=266 width=320 contentId="901158decf0c26e2"></OBJECT>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-70679103443935006502008-09-07T18:35:00.001-07:002008-09-21T16:23:22.872-07:00The Puppet Show“The Puppet Show”<br />9/6/08<br /><br />In this episode, SHE tries to avoid making jokes, HE ponders the structure of the universe, and we learn why it's called 'show business' and not 'show friends'.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKW0lPtxwCWvYxzp3bpBU-D5EQV0mieII-6VthAo5RgH-ChYgXX-3hSSL4JzhUus2BGJW8RBrJgOXDlpUbr2e1ig61GuErDjvxOFy3gL_Q6jL2F3V9OwKxSue75RHz7JYJzS4CxGfhEJ4/s1600-h/Cordelia+sings.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKW0lPtxwCWvYxzp3bpBU-D5EQV0mieII-6VthAo5RgH-ChYgXX-3hSSL4JzhUus2BGJW8RBrJgOXDlpUbr2e1ig61GuErDjvxOFy3gL_Q6jL2F3V9OwKxSue75RHz7JYJzS4CxGfhEJ4/s200/Cordelia+sings.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243459163765777250" /></a><br /><br /><h3>Morgan and Sid</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m going to be completely serious with my interpretation of this episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’re not going to crack any jokes.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope. Not a one.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not even about the violinist who suckolas?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or the fact that there’s a mime in the show?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope. Although we know the mime is poor research. No high school kid would be a mime.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhorkpOW9VSbVSyrH3hQVeYLO_HDV5fxu_1W9GtttxtBoEPvm3_lG49SBycALiEqXi-GaNekqtQIvTuvWWS3NQDlNn2Lht1YRO0vJLk1QjAbDEJgLZfZ09VHZ-1z3IKEkT8NRKYWJUVJ5c/s1600-h/ballerina.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhorkpOW9VSbVSyrH3hQVeYLO_HDV5fxu_1W9GtttxtBoEPvm3_lG49SBycALiEqXi-GaNekqtQIvTuvWWS3NQDlNn2Lht1YRO0vJLk1QjAbDEJgLZfZ09VHZ-1z3IKEkT8NRKYWJUVJ5c/s200/ballerina.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243459834684787106" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Another lesson we can take is that we should always beware of “method” ventriloquists who are always in character. Also, the stretchy ballerina is history. And what’s with ballerinas on TV all being really tall? They’re not, really. They tend to be petite like Summer Glau. So you can toss’em.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re an expert on ballerina tossing?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And when they’re not dancing, they’re usually falling down or knocking something over.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Rehearsal</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “I have my pride,” says Xander. No you don’t. Otherwise you wouldn’t be wearing that idiotic shirt. It’s like he’s a scrub for the sockmonkey team.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sock Monkeys are funny. You’re still going to try to be funny.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’re the humorless one, not me.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeJ_NjkOChqooJot47ZJgjR_u8O2G7qrfKrjDAccgMTGv6aU1zPrICfbvnDANaFTde2Nf7nnH6xfHIlLtBa4egDudI0wwwNyM51NbJ8hfTKeBj5qpewwhMPBD-1MVyo-0UQZFUf5IKxHY/s1600-h/sock+monkey+xander.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeJ_NjkOChqooJot47ZJgjR_u8O2G7qrfKrjDAccgMTGv6aU1zPrICfbvnDANaFTde2Nf7nnH6xfHIlLtBa4egDudI0wwwNyM51NbJ8hfTKeBj5qpewwhMPBD-1MVyo-0UQZFUf5IKxHY/s200/sock+monkey+xander.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243460632605924834" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “I think I have touched and felt for the last time.” Like Principal Snyder.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Scary you’re taking cues from him. On the other hand, he does have that great line in this scene: “Kids. I don’t like them.” I take it back. I love Principal Snyder.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s very realistic.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Emily</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> If you want to be killed, hang out in the locker room. They should post a sign: “Ladies, this locker room is for your getting-killed convenience.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least she didn’t fall and land on somebody like what usually happens.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Some corpses are so rude.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you notice that they film Giles taller in this season? Willow seems really tiny next to Giles. They shoot down a lot. Say, what do you think the significance of that is, Miss Serious?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think they’re trying to reinforce the idea that these kids are actually kids. Are any of these actors actually in their high school years?<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkGrmUBniUd76kKRBKvALkeiFmOX5NhIlXYF_bfoa5zntc0qnkP9jpEXQpDP6EBjn_jx-RAq-UIuV2AB67cP42AF0Pj-5LYzXOxnDaR6JTF2tazYCNhtN90hnvMHcLYymBHaadXrUqPYA/s1600-h/tall+giles.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkGrmUBniUd76kKRBKvALkeiFmOX5NhIlXYF_bfoa5zntc0qnkP9jpEXQpDP6EBjn_jx-RAq-UIuV2AB67cP42AF0Pj-5LYzXOxnDaR6JTF2tazYCNhtN90hnvMHcLYymBHaadXrUqPYA/s200/tall+giles.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243461045089367250" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know Cordelia isn’t. She was 27. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy isn’t. She was 20. How old was Alyson Hannigan?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> 23. Giles was…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> 600?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Close. 43.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Asking Morgan</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ-YPNPC1rKjC7nbXCz5kfH8YVR0I7z3k7vxsm14aym34qEZSEz2r8rfLGFH_oM1VaTUKDdZ7sawoGGqxwHWemOkOKDwYfVbWg_ZUUE5vfAMQ0DU6js5ucE_8SI3mrP-lNVi6LoGfeyNk/s1600-h/migraine+morgan.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ-YPNPC1rKjC7nbXCz5kfH8YVR0I7z3k7vxsm14aym34qEZSEz2r8rfLGFH_oM1VaTUKDdZ7sawoGGqxwHWemOkOKDwYfVbWg_ZUUE5vfAMQ0DU6js5ucE_8SI3mrP-lNVi6LoGfeyNk/s200/migraine+morgan.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243461661800752386" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Morgan gets migraines. They come with the craziness.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You get migraines. You come with the craziness.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That sounds dangerously near a joke, sweetie.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But I’m not laughing. And you don’t think it’s funny.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s really not funny is Buffy’s leopard dress. Holy cow. That’s very horrible.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Morgan’s Locker</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Count it. Principal Snyder sneaks up on Buffy. Ever notice how no other teacher ever gets in Buffy’s way?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They’re too busy trying not to get killed to worry about her.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKkUZabo6Knb8LG1nC4R2eEm_A2fJGP9fGm616XkEqEjFemkDFmY-gpDvYyid9MqjNLFjS1SRkmttxK9dkFwxqOlbDonxiTxn0rapN7ycxlCQePZnOOPAuy9kF5btt77fbEUuc9BUKrsk/s1600-h/big+locker.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKkUZabo6Knb8LG1nC4R2eEm_A2fJGP9fGm616XkEqEjFemkDFmY-gpDvYyid9MqjNLFjS1SRkmttxK9dkFwxqOlbDonxiTxn0rapN7ycxlCQePZnOOPAuy9kF5btt77fbEUuc9BUKrsk/s200/big+locker.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243462774658347362" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>Is that an interdimensional locker?</strong> How can Morgan fit that ginormous suitcase in there?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah! And Buffy can open it in there without even taking it out of the locker.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I guess that comes with living on the Hellmouth. We take things like three-dimensional space so for granted.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Buffy at Home</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What kind of lotion is that? You know all about lotions.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Looks like something from Body and Bathworks.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So what, a hand cream maybe? I really have no idea. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Bless your heart for trying.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtV5jYaiPIOcmVdA3m7eF-oMM0qlJN-BU6_x2f-AeA6kg4Jdd5bFEIPS2IaoQx4LBukdKBo2hANJtPo6LO-g5QPf6YpniYC0xBX5MCf4dYL3yYcTnp3NOvs9_PVMAvx-MhsPwPcgnEdyA/s1600-h/rust-oleum.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtV5jYaiPIOcmVdA3m7eF-oMM0qlJN-BU6_x2f-AeA6kg4Jdd5bFEIPS2IaoQx4LBukdKBo2hANJtPo6LO-g5QPf6YpniYC0xBX5MCf4dYL3yYcTnp3NOvs9_PVMAvx-MhsPwPcgnEdyA/s200/rust-oleum.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243464215993627810" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The dummy in the window really is creepy. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Demonic puppets don’t need to be invited into your homes, you know. They can come right in.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How do we protect ourselves?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t know. Rust-Oleum, maybe?<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Live Dummy? </h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy’s outfit is really great today. I like the black number.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s a timeless look. You can’t go wrong with it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You don’t even remember it.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgifu6sJJSoMKi-RZn9kECItILhleh5GqGOF_lV5pATc42D4vIrYd6kq-EeLvugz5U2H4KcY2TAZrT7mGKCsg2q8naoYz4I5qoGT9RPg0VOwKQmAVYEy7pUnyhd9w_mmiNw9snLJpg8Kcc/s1600-h/cordy+hair.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgifu6sJJSoMKi-RZn9kECItILhleh5GqGOF_lV5pATc42D4vIrYd6kq-EeLvugz5U2H4KcY2TAZrT7mGKCsg2q8naoYz4I5qoGT9RPg0VOwKQmAVYEy7pUnyhd9w_mmiNw9snLJpg8Kcc/s200/cordy+hair.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243465071975343746" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was thinking about Xander’s scheme to get rid of Cordelia—just criticize her hair.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I read today how to work it so you never have to go into Abercrombie and Fitch with your teenager.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And how’s that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You know how they play that music really, really loud? All you can hear is that? Just dance to it. You’ll embarrass them so badly they’ll never want you to walk in there again.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV1Gs0J9Qc5NSwSfpE0ndeXMiuC1ZQjJg7wge_ah8KihbEHt_N6EUNPmZ5y5Kxe3CSXmneXOkyzM_9OaeocuW9vFZ7lKItKJm25AFK2p4tBVqSFqPcSkGaDMafd4pUtrXa5m9jOLlRsKc/s1600-h/brotherhood+7.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiV1Gs0J9Qc5NSwSfpE0ndeXMiuC1ZQjJg7wge_ah8KihbEHt_N6EUNPmZ5y5Kxe3CSXmneXOkyzM_9OaeocuW9vFZ7lKItKJm25AFK2p4tBVqSFqPcSkGaDMafd4pUtrXa5m9jOLlRsKc/s200/brotherhood+7.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243465785586455522" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ooh, a brotherhood of 7 demons…show me a picture! show me a picture! Bingo! There is it! Thanks, Giles!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love the pictures. You get to see what they’re looking for.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They are rather convenient.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Looking for Morgan</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What’s up with this guy bringing his dummy to class? No one says anything. Not Mrs. Jackson. Nobody.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s up with the teacher using the word “eponymous” in class? Hot damn, I think I’m in love!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW4OfTdUljViw2DekTLLfGsTSsaMcPptDA1Vk4DzHbDZ4SIzzIlHPIKnf1K78N5YNTebm8u2mQ4FchLpaDbRRXhGi6s2-vTP5Qwn6npmtD1rsogK0eRMYQEPXFbuugNg0TFJgpuesok6A/s1600-h/cordy+freak+show.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW4OfTdUljViw2DekTLLfGsTSsaMcPptDA1Vk4DzHbDZ4SIzzIlHPIKnf1K78N5YNTebm8u2mQ4FchLpaDbRRXhGi6s2-vTP5Qwn6npmtD1rsogK0eRMYQEPXFbuugNg0TFJgpuesok6A/s200/cordy+freak+show.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243466492411295442" /></a><br /><font color=yellow> CORDELIA: Looks like someone likes you. That’s adorable. You and the dummy could join the freak show.</font color><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia, I just love her.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She has the best lines.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know who doesn’t have the best lines? Mrs. Jackson. She thinks Morgan has become detached.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Have you confronted a student lately about becoming detached?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You have to be attached in order to risk becoming detached.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>Not Inanimate</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So Xander stole Sid from Mrs. Jackson’s cupboard. What a thief!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s funny when he loses the puppet.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He should have stored that dummy in the cage.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What was he thinking, sitting the dummy down in a chair? That’s kind of girly.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHPUZTGJIbCqGdnKApet3Bj4T-QdrxH2P3Zqb2TJ84CNF6i39YXNfAxHqBidzIqU0daCYD3THVd4EEZOc6UCghEzBxrJjLraUtu9QqodgEJIoCh2VOcCdcGOmxfUdDqq4GkYdjy-y25ms/s1600-h/xander+sid.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHPUZTGJIbCqGdnKApet3Bj4T-QdrxH2P3Zqb2TJ84CNF6i39YXNfAxHqBidzIqU0daCYD3THVd4EEZOc6UCghEzBxrJjLraUtu9QqodgEJIoCh2VOcCdcGOmxfUdDqq4GkYdjy-y25ms/s200/xander+sid.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243467410725993922" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like he was going to play with it later?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “Would you like some tea, Mr. Sid?”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wonder if he has a set of those tiny chairs at home.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Demon Hunter</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> One of my favorite scenes.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This is an awesome reveal. Sid the dummy thought Buffy was the demon. Meanwhile, Snyder is stalking Buffy around the school.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Because he has no other responsibilities.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Other than causing misdirection. Did you notice the demon picture next to the dressing room door? I wonder what play that was for.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What is Xander supposed to be doing? I forget. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you notice that he was writing in a library book? He should have been killed just for that.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If Giles was any kind of a librarian, he’d have done it himself.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buff got jumped by a chandelier. Must have been super heavy. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It snuck up on her. Count it.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgv417y6cG0LUwrFRWBN_vAtIBkHt3KFhYCM6B1NhM3P1M71XlW6VBU92QTTAYUJmtTO56DlL5SrYdAvQCPZibynOXXXLC8-gG6U790X7DHjABalT8QbKdEvytvOz5dfuPb9LBrQmUgrbw/s1600-h/sid+the+stabber.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgv417y6cG0LUwrFRWBN_vAtIBkHt3KFhYCM6B1NhM3P1M71XlW6VBU92QTTAYUJmtTO56DlL5SrYdAvQCPZibynOXXXLC8-gG6U790X7DHjABalT8QbKdEvytvOz5dfuPb9LBrQmUgrbw/s200/sid+the+stabber.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243469040673245410" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And that dummy is a lousy stab. Missed her from what, eighteen inches?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Hard to imagine he killed anything.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Power Circle</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The power circle…Giles assumed it was mystical, not a showbiz thing.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He doesn’t know crap.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sid knew a slayer in the 30s. The one Spike killed?<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixE3bRi_rhMzIPDoEV0-7GwWSpml0G6IYHcuaSyrL7pH2P9YmhLCloM-Dzl1KH-bEbU2vwH6SffD3DdDmoS_qC2rqYpzfr7ChqX2bkZr5s6e4JZZPJyEeGEzStZy_a_J3VtrWSU0_9Q3c/s1600-h/the_more_you_know2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixE3bRi_rhMzIPDoEV0-7GwWSpml0G6IYHcuaSyrL7pH2P9YmhLCloM-Dzl1KH-bEbU2vwH6SffD3DdDmoS_qC2rqYpzfr7ChqX2bkZr5s6e4JZZPJyEeGEzStZy_a_J3VtrWSU0_9Q3c/s200/the_more_you_know2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243471173935317218" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No, that one was Chinese, not Korean. And about 30 years earlier, during the Boxer Rebellion.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It would have been funny if it were the same one, and Sid said, “Korean, Chinese…they all look the same to me.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And then someone could have said, “You know what? You really are a dummy.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “The More You Know.” Ahhh.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I like the suggestion that Snyder might be the demon, simply by his behavior.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There’s also the scene where his ears are translucent. That was a creepy effect.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>A Rejected Brain</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I want to know why Snyder allowed a guillotine in the school.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There’s progressive, and then there’s…I don’t know what the hell that is.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiD3p6xhyphenhyphencW8lXMxABoX686vBLB1uXso_kQu-NJZGj4NR9pz0Efs1vw7e5G0Cta1VQW4m2aorK1lKBb-1mLHXJwXcCn8ODLOKmRIh3rvZRcjDBJmtEc_bVJ1T-fx2tKBklM2OmhTn4IhdI/s1600-h/giles+easy+mark.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiD3p6xhyphenhyphencW8lXMxABoX686vBLB1uXso_kQu-NJZGj4NR9pz0Efs1vw7e5G0Cta1VQW4m2aorK1lKBb-1mLHXJwXcCn8ODLOKmRIh3rvZRcjDBJmtEc_bVJ1T-fx2tKBklM2OmhTn4IhdI/s200/giles+easy+mark.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243470356894026818" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles is so easily duped in this scene.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Who is the amazing Mark? Well, Giles is.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s amazing he lasted the whole series.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h3>The Magic Act</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I can’t believe someone decided to open the curtains after they went through all that. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Right. All that chaos going on, and they hang around, manning the ropes. That’s dedication to the craft. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Apparently they don’t look out to see if the first act is actually behind the curtain.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They have a schedule to keep. Besides, the show must…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Stop right there.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I know you enjoyed the ending. What did you think of Xander playing Oedipus?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He was lousy. Sid the Dummy gave a less wooden performance.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow runs off. Another stage humiliation for Willow.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbE-iG2mf3V9YFtL4j-iLL4mSemyCFENfS61GFzRdwDQWj0O3CDfUiyVTBWTf0xp2SVQXObR5MGAs4w-98eNBHTuEV4Wkd0cWAGgOmNYTJIcs62U37sJlVDAH5FbPpLwtYF_h1yWJhAuk/s1600-h/worst+oedipus+ever.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbE-iG2mf3V9YFtL4j-iLL4mSemyCFENfS61GFzRdwDQWj0O3CDfUiyVTBWTf0xp2SVQXObR5MGAs4w-98eNBHTuEV4Wkd0cWAGgOmNYTJIcs62U37sJlVDAH5FbPpLwtYF_h1yWJhAuk/s200/worst+oedipus+ever.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5243472491915425922" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Another?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The Season 4 finale where she dreams she’s in the play?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re like an encyclopedia of Buffy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I really am.<br /><br />Next time: "Nightmares"<a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/09/nightmares.html"></a>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-19417307641343192482008-09-01T18:23:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:25:00.304-07:00"I Robot...You Jane"I, Robot…You, Jane<br />8/30/08<br /><br />In this episode, Willow learns about the perils of online dating, Giles forgets about basic netiquette, and Miss Calendar reveals she has piercings in non-traditional places. The presence of Cordelia and Angel is sorely lacking.<br /><br /><h3>Moloch, the Book</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg23u9bKDUzm5vIR6bgKMr_jD3Uz9utTizLyhYjOBUPPv90xqr6YvcmwU2T0JWzcwS9lFSsWEX0xTspzoYP8WqN7JBpAij34eSq00i_L-EIlzt1VjnPP0yNEXUWJY3bDIk5trr8OwrK-Vw/s1600-h/kAHLESS+wedding.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg23u9bKDUzm5vIR6bgKMr_jD3Uz9utTizLyhYjOBUPPv90xqr6YvcmwU2T0JWzcwS9lFSsWEX0xTspzoYP8WqN7JBpAij34eSq00i_L-EIlzt1VjnPP0yNEXUWJY3bDIk5trr8OwrK-Vw/s400/kAHLESS+wedding.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241229615072073106" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That demon looks like the one Giles turns into in Season 4.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> ‘Getting bound’ sounds kinky.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The circle of Kayless? Isn’t that the Klingon dude?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like a god or something.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em><strong>Kaplagh!</strong></em><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why don’t they just destroy the book after they bind Moloch in it?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or throw it down a well or something. Not send it to a high school.<br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Fritz is <em>muy loco</em>.<br /></span><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Since the scanning was Calendar’s idea, we can blame <em>her </em>for the episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> We should at least blame her for not keeping control of her brainwashed and/or insane students.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Fritz is muy loco.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “If you’re not jacked in, you’re not alive,” Fritz snarls. <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWn5nDuFo3Z9uJhmJZbiB5vobWH5MFirFGUDGD2T6LfWbvg-2mNmiGGsRqOJxEZvhapMLnJRb1NptFEigIsuE30qAAJNpEhxrAF8Lf6Xim4zWO9FKF_8Zspobe1xkDF3D6TZdGy__LXuw/s1600-h/Crazy+Fritz.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWn5nDuFo3Z9uJhmJZbiB5vobWH5MFirFGUDGD2T6LfWbvg-2mNmiGGsRqOJxEZvhapMLnJRb1NptFEigIsuE30qAAJNpEhxrAF8Lf6Xim4zWO9FKF_8Zspobe1xkDF3D6TZdGy__LXuw/s320/Crazy+Fritz.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241230263157920802" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m jacked in too. Did you know that about me, honey?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If by jacked in you mean your USB cable is made out of <em>yarn</em>.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The printed page is obsolete? <em>Nobody told me!</em><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They were saying that 10 years ago, and they’re saying it now. Pages are still being printed.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Newspapers are dying, at least. That’s something.<br /><br /><strong><font color=yellow>Giles:</font color> I’ll be back in the Middle Ages.<br /><font color=yellow>Calendar: </font color> Did you ever leave? </strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <strong>WAAH WAAH WAAH </strong>I like that exchange. I’m a classicist like Giles. How about you?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m not a techie, that’s for sure.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, I know. I’ve seen your blog.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ooh, Scan-a-matique! I think that’s a Mac. Remember when Macs were big, and not just for graphic design?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We played SimCity for hours at a time on ours.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVCxdy-An_ehxMd87wWIJed7pM0TrIsl9YKG1A2veskAorSRC1ZvX57Euy19L_F9KzY5H-2lzip-5aBpeCPJkjqFZ2x2ILoU_keUtfnWEq7150hmYLj0oMlOuzbzB8p3IXPCKe1tJcMAQ/s1600-h/simcity+3000.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVCxdy-An_ehxMd87wWIJed7pM0TrIsl9YKG1A2veskAorSRC1ZvX57Euy19L_F9KzY5H-2lzip-5aBpeCPJkjqFZ2x2ILoU_keUtfnWEq7150hmYLj0oMlOuzbzB8p3IXPCKe1tJcMAQ/s200/simcity+3000.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241231063042275938" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I still have that stupid song running through my head and it’s been like 15 years.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I sang it earlier tonight.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The sad thing is, I know you’re not lying.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Willow’s Net Pal</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoYUe2A2Y7jUjBVNjB231AyD4GnS6cT72jH_Zw-n0_wSgxdWekVjOcWnVB-POmAsVMtz6t9OUr7YWtYCQT_RnltdoBgev2_yFg_wt3X1M7n6pjNM0flMs3xzRI1M9u8AmBQHkKZGfI4SQ/s1600-h/buffy+harajuku+outfit.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoYUe2A2Y7jUjBVNjB231AyD4GnS6cT72jH_Zw-n0_wSgxdWekVjOcWnVB-POmAsVMtz6t9OUr7YWtYCQT_RnltdoBgev2_yFg_wt3X1M7n6pjNM0flMs3xzRI1M9u8AmBQHkKZGfI4SQ/s200/buffy+harajuku+outfit.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241231437362004786" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That outfit makes Buffy look quite skanky…or like a Japanese teenager. You know, like Gwen Stefani.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s not wearing camo. I have no problem with that outfit.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You wouldn’t.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9reIVlIBI46O52potVLOUD3nbO6Cw3F5n_bCdfN_GleAg6y9FwF-5u311LMiv_LdndOmirWXHB32LMmpskaKZ4wqOdEobwUWzpDKr8pHJHWug8DTloKIRclGNI97nvmeGlmryOUhfVHw/s1600-h/drunk+hungover+calendar.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9reIVlIBI46O52potVLOUD3nbO6Cw3F5n_bCdfN_GleAg6y9FwF-5u311LMiv_LdndOmirWXHB32LMmpskaKZ4wqOdEobwUWzpDKr8pHJHWug8DTloKIRclGNI97nvmeGlmryOUhfVHw/s200/drunk+hungover+calendar.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241231717438875218" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here comes Calendar, wearing the sunglasses and looking like she’s hung over.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Back when teachers still went to work hung over.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Now they say you have to be sober.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This episode makes me miss the 90s.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So people are suspicious of Willow’s online boyfriend? Just because he could be like a 39-year old paedophile/serial killer?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> These days, don’t you just <em>assume</em> they are? It was sweet her thinking he was what he said he was.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyzHJtmG47OFyQZbOqfH4r3JHPvcjEf6irJoblK-1HQwjWdmjWbZtd8O6GVsDziSGvAfOd9gknwF4NpIZYaJiBztQTI0bM51D0QpLtA1CuMUxNeBbR1qlhuEcWJKSmbKyKBy4GzJ-pseo/s1600-h/Brooklyn-Bridge.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyzHJtmG47OFyQZbOqfH4r3JHPvcjEf6irJoblK-1HQwjWdmjWbZtd8O6GVsDziSGvAfOd9gknwF4NpIZYaJiBztQTI0bM51D0QpLtA1CuMUxNeBbR1qlhuEcWJKSmbKyKBy4GzJ-pseo/s320/Brooklyn-Bridge.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241232034428386306" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m guessing she also sends back all that crap from Publisher’s Clearing House.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I understand she also owns the Brooklyn Bridge and a large tract of Florida Swampland.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s still waiting on all that Nigerian refugee money, though.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you see that Buffy had a 2.8 GPA?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And we’re expected to believe she would be accepted at <em>Northwestern</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They didn’t say which Northwestern. Maybe they meant Northwestern California. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhijkNVbd9V9MOyPC3ppc4Sd5Fhf1tzBaDFK4i5E3hLGvTd4QydbWTaoQuTu_6Cs6095mV7ux_5LqkdpKj77n4NvstBXxj1Gg6WA_sJCOLRxYVWl-1q3uIluldtixDpufBenrSf1zBtvS8/s1600-h/northwestern2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhijkNVbd9V9MOyPC3ppc4Sd5Fhf1tzBaDFK4i5E3hLGvTd4QydbWTaoQuTu_6Cs6095mV7ux_5LqkdpKj77n4NvstBXxj1Gg6WA_sJCOLRxYVWl-1q3uIluldtixDpufBenrSf1zBtvS8/s320/northwestern2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241232358891182194" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or its satellite school, Sunnydale Northwest.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Northwestern International.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Northwestern Community College.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Northwestern Institute of TV/VCR Repair.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><strong><font color=yellow>Student: </font color> Nazi Germany was a model of a well-ordered society? Who wrote this?</strong><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhChWULSnmfcEkGzqSbn-_j-EJ9VLynU-Ih8mw2HMgGqtCKE8Z9Jy51IbTVES4KKeRNAUKhKrE3i4zAFPxIeWlegsqSL9KHeDMbZo6yD3ZSGUb1xa_Y_haRkSajxSAlA17CWRZfKq5aIRE/s1600-h/huge+laptop.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhChWULSnmfcEkGzqSbn-_j-EJ9VLynU-Ih8mw2HMgGqtCKE8Z9Jy51IbTVES4KKeRNAUKhKrE3i4zAFPxIeWlegsqSL9KHeDMbZo6yD3ZSGUb1xa_Y_haRkSajxSAlA17CWRZfKq5aIRE/s200/huge+laptop.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241232705879987074" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>You </em>did, idiot. That’s what happens when you write the thing at 2 a.m. the night before<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Dig the space-age laptop. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That had to weigh, what? only thirty pounds?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It was huge. Like a Royal typewriter with a screen.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander’s shirt does not make me want to vomit, but those bangs are making me gag.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You don’t like his fag bangs?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What?!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Makes him look effeminate.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I knew there was a reason for the nausea.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3> Computer Geeks</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Wow…here we get to see self-righteous Buffy for one of the first times. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was like Willow in high school. No one wanted to date me.<span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />I was not courted by Moloch in high school.<br /></span><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not even Moloch?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was not courted by Moloch in high school.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> His loss.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Get Buffy. “Is there a way to trace an e-letter?” WTF. Is that anything like e-mail?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This episode is turning out to be dated.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like carbon-dated. Besides, no doubt Dave is more worried about finding e-porn.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3> C.R.D. </h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd8UnzF0cXz6hsAAOOJ6pb3FxU-1cyeWMeNN9QStSr_D1tnL37Z39Py_oynnRGN8NQKdgI9mp59pMFFxgNW3IvETVxpraqmxwY4DqYH9BiMNafBavzez5eEt-l6u-tfzlK9UsdIyVasck/s1600-h/Freaky+Dave%3DHarry+Anderson.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd8UnzF0cXz6hsAAOOJ6pb3FxU-1cyeWMeNN9QStSr_D1tnL37Z39Py_oynnRGN8NQKdgI9mp59pMFFxgNW3IvETVxpraqmxwY4DqYH9BiMNafBavzez5eEt-l6u-tfzlK9UsdIyVasck/s320/Freaky+Dave%3DHarry+Anderson.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241233156938776322" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dave kind of looks like Harry Anderson from <em>Night Court</em>. Show us a magic trick, dude!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I find it curious that their security is hooked up into the Internet. Is that standard practice?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How else are the hackers going to get in? Everyone in Sunnydale puts everything online.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Building plans, medical reports…you’re right.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Of course, no one suspects that Willow usually just googles her information.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Suspicion</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Way to go, Moloch… you blew it. Overreached.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Demons aren’t all that smart. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They’re more out of touch than Giles is. On the other hand, you get trapped in a book for 500 years, how are your social skills going to turn out?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You tell me. Trapped in a book? Always reading a book? How <em>would </em>your social skills turn out? Sweetie?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Moloch isn’t reading the book, he <em>is </em>the book. Smart ass.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>A Blank Book</h3><br /><br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Bickering leads to wicka wicka waah.<br /></span><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, the sexual tension between Jenny and Rupert!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is that what you call that?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You didn’t sense it? It was palpable. They’re a hot couple!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They become a hot couple. But they were irritating in this episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You do know that bickering leads to <em>wicka wicka waah</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, in movie world bickering leads to wicka wicka waah. In the real world where I live, it leads to the sofa.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0l9gwe10ySb7RosQpbbYXY4DSkRc9K6nFjPWzuBsrQ_h0tU2MlkUeQTTKKwJc_l1KphSNDoBWodbKrKfkkzx1MWhMuM8qK2HNTGVwwo-PHoo2muH3hmJIDT-yYENGWKANNmPCBRoZQGU/s1600-h/Jenny+Calendar.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0l9gwe10ySb7RosQpbbYXY4DSkRc9K6nFjPWzuBsrQ_h0tU2MlkUeQTTKKwJc_l1KphSNDoBWodbKrKfkkzx1MWhMuM8qK2HNTGVwwo-PHoo2muH3hmJIDT-yYENGWKANNmPCBRoZQGU/s200/Jenny+Calendar.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241235330442133538" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love her black leather jacket.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So did I. Went great with her hair.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Dave Points the Way</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDFrobj8Up2mIi-O5hIkPb1J3-YIxqENDftFGRCf3YbOvbS8rUC3b8huETSf1hzc4jmR-Pq4wNND5lMVYolBXwmmbPKcpNKfUAWm1cwzolHo-iJyvuwvIK_-SHXgrHb67YvdSIh1p_DVM/s1600-h/bad+things+in+locker+room.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDFrobj8Up2mIi-O5hIkPb1J3-YIxqENDftFGRCf3YbOvbS8rUC3b8huETSf1hzc4jmR-Pq4wNND5lMVYolBXwmmbPKcpNKfUAWm1cwzolHo-iJyvuwvIK_-SHXgrHb67YvdSIh1p_DVM/s320/bad+things+in+locker+room.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241236143434399362" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love Buffy’s camisole. It’s really neat-looking.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This is probably not the first time Fritz has been in the girl’s locker room…I bet he was pushed in there by bullies a lot. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Bad things happen in the girls’ locker room. <br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sniff. Dave’s not sold on killing Buffy. Well, that’s it for him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dave’s suicide note is actually well-written. Not like the pathetically terrible suicide notes teenagers write these days.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I miss the 90’s.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Demon Story</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8uwd2i3BztGGjuYHIOq8QPm6AeYL8ZSEH85kMOB0mmyQiDpdYeI1ioDNtNp9Pr_1W-XHsMVjklPZgHk8eHfp723fRw0cWnuOWueLdO3mx26wi5i0vJycOhZ2ZCOQHUYM8zCvydsw061s/s1600-h/lawnmower+man.bmp"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8uwd2i3BztGGjuYHIOq8QPm6AeYL8ZSEH85kMOB0mmyQiDpdYeI1ioDNtNp9Pr_1W-XHsMVjklPZgHk8eHfp723fRw0cWnuOWueLdO3mx26wi5i0vJycOhZ2ZCOQHUYM8zCvydsw061s/s200/lawnmower+man.bmp" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241236703435727394" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Moloch is in the computer…It’s basically <em>The Lawnmower Man</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t remember <em>The Lawnmower Man</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>It was a Stephen King story. I think Pierce Brosnan was in it. I am God here!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3> Dave’s Demise</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Delete File? Delete interest is more like it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Are you bored with this Buffy episode?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s not my favorite. Where’s Cordelia?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s right! This episode needed Cordelia.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> More Cordelia and less Fritz and Dave.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I thought it was very considerate how Dave stapled the suicide note to himself.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cleared up any possible confusion. Whose suicide note is this? Oh wait, it’s yours!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Thank you, recently deceased teenager!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>No More Waiting</h3><br /><br /><strong><font color=yellow>Giles: </font color> There’s a demon on the internet.<br /><font color=yellow>Calendar: </font color> I know.</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The next line was, “you can find him at www.molochthecorruptor.com or at Moloch’s Facebook page.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m sure it receives a lot of hits.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Probably more than our website does, unfortunately.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPJKqUNhemWpS1bzPBDmcny3AJjKHVHwygs6__UOUSeXIBJX1mdrAwygsD10ztKi4gsKc4DKD4gJOjtwJNUKTp0tj1RHDfFNzy2iTATeaIn1xIgj1fWFPgXiKyzpMl5Q_KNZHrYcaEFrM/s1600-h/Moloch+facebook.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPJKqUNhemWpS1bzPBDmcny3AJjKHVHwygs6__UOUSeXIBJX1mdrAwygsD10ztKi4gsKc4DKD4gJOjtwJNUKTp0tj1RHDfFNzy2iTATeaIn1xIgj1fWFPgXiKyzpMl5Q_KNZHrYcaEFrM/s400/Moloch+facebook.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241233462863230338" /></a><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3> At C.R.D. </h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Poor Willow. The hostage. First of many. Some guy told me he’d give me the world. It turned out to be a globe.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s quite clever, actually.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s in the next room.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNQX36de-FfA43Hi9xKRCDGNrbJz97P36TaGK0oeJpVlvbP8u6qLc8YUfUUY647BuG8vaTKtQlSF57-sUgQ1nswM2J3SZyJl_0G4biUsg4l2L-M11bam6XRGwXz7iDXNBkJRQLP7NApS8/s1600-h/old+globe+europe.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNQX36de-FfA43Hi9xKRCDGNrbJz97P36TaGK0oeJpVlvbP8u6qLc8YUfUUY647BuG8vaTKtQlSF57-sUgQ1nswM2J3SZyJl_0G4biUsg4l2L-M11bam6XRGwXz7iDXNBkJRQLP7NApS8/s200/old+globe+europe.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241237339856170130" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey. That belongs to me. Get your own globe.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <font color=orange>Legally half that globe is mine.</font color><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You can have that globe over my cold dead fingers. But not literally.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dang! MechaMoloch is hardcore. I wonder if he’s HSL.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think they were all using dial-up back then. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes. So that means whenever MechaMoloch appeared not be paying attention to you, he was actually just loading.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDTr-eGA6XlKBZEo52bBhcn8Qw3bqn0zw56hS2G5NsYNZy7lqK1aviQw8IOKBXvMyN3C9z2olPHzAHVAX7FHo6xFNZlGGbwBbF3m62fPbmPomb6m_6wx2QeIIwA87FBmTDH6R2Uf9A6jg/s1600-h/mechaMoloch.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDTr-eGA6XlKBZEo52bBhcn8Qw3bqn0zw56hS2G5NsYNZy7lqK1aviQw8IOKBXvMyN3C9z2olPHzAHVAX7FHo6xFNZlGGbwBbF3m62fPbmPomb6m_6wx2QeIIwA87FBmTDH6R2Uf9A6jg/s200/mechaMoloch.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241237863165734482" /></a><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3> Exorcism</h3><br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Demon, come! I command you! </em>Why is Giles shouting? Calendar is like two feet away.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s getting into it. I’ve been told that emotions can be typed into the computer.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wonder if Miss Calendar was using all caps at this point.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And like a dozen exclamation points.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Moloch probably thought that was rude.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He’s bound. er…where? I guess Moloch had a back-up file.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They needed to look through the manual before they did the binding.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They could have gone to the troubleshooting tab, <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or at least check the FAQ’s.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So all you had to do was destroy the container Moloch was in? I bet those monks in 1418 wish they had thought of that.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s craziness.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Books Vs. Computers</h3><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl54iweFqx0BEBMlysTz6IPZFHQ9rqgZU_7gZ1JTprKYtjqPgakhZh_uUnQuAqsPYb7cYRgUURZEvnG6wuoq8FpV4CBd7hWdMVBhiTqiuBIJ49L41BoiV3rqL1puf-JqRqIc2FHAJ0JQQ/s1600-h/giles+erm+uh.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl54iweFqx0BEBMlysTz6IPZFHQ9rqgZU_7gZ1JTprKYtjqPgakhZh_uUnQuAqsPYb7cYRgUURZEvnG6wuoq8FpV4CBd7hWdMVBhiTqiuBIJ49L41BoiV3rqL1puf-JqRqIc2FHAJ0JQQ/s320/giles+erm+uh.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241238504530392018" /></a> <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He doesn't dangle a corkscrew from his ear.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “That’s not where I dangle it.” I’m stumped. Where could she dangle it?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Aw dang, that's the hotness!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh, right. <br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDjk4gfACrk2e1TTu3FbTBhjM7XSQdIMU1eo-TR8oe2nEbfo9Stk2N4cnbaxS6fke3e_HNZ8P9I1obSUBt8VM67RsqpUsaIJs9WrPY0eooXOBAfnO7wr7P1p8ZS4NHke1Um5TivDCuF5o/s1600-h/Match+Game.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDjk4gfACrk2e1TTu3FbTBhjM7XSQdIMU1eo-TR8oe2nEbfo9Stk2N4cnbaxS6fke3e_HNZ8P9I1obSUBt8VM67RsqpUsaIJs9WrPY0eooXOBAfnO7wr7P1p8ZS4NHke1Um5TivDCuF5o/s200/Match+Game.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241240366189270994" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Demon robot, giant praying mantis, vampire...it's like an episode of Match Game 76.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>15</em>76 maybe.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Except for the robot.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This was a good ending. Probably the best part of the episode. Signature Joss Whedon ending…not quite a happy note.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4yGWAKakHD4UQuMYtn4Cs3nX_t-RcndBADn0BqUvAxuFHUYG-t6hGYA0b4bqNgN8eeS_7WRxKsjsiRVoo-JJq0X6DPQ1Qqif87IIse63GNGQmV1zXgJ0m6qnrtqLY8e78Cq7vQyPxSbw/s1600-h/were+doomed.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4yGWAKakHD4UQuMYtn4Cs3nX_t-RcndBADn0BqUvAxuFHUYG-t6hGYA0b4bqNgN8eeS_7WRxKsjsiRVoo-JJq0X6DPQ1Qqif87IIse63GNGQmV1zXgJ0m6qnrtqLY8e78Cq7vQyPxSbw/s320/were+doomed.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5241238959785225170" /></a><br /><br />Next time: <font color=yellow><a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/09/puppet-show.html">"The Puppet Show"</a></font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-9006698002919401332008-08-22T20:42:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:25:24.892-07:00Angel“Angel”<br />8/22/08<br /><br />In this episode, Angel and Buffy kiss for the first time, Angel reveals his big secret, and the Renaissance Faire comes to Sunnydale. Also, the Master runs out of ideas.<br /><br /><h3>The Master’s Next Move</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhadYuMEHtI8EUTXkKHhcVEzd2GkRiCHcRA0W_FzCytQIowfFz-fTJ1JR4Ab1hwpLBSUjpcIXI_Ss6b43yGiXfq9Zl5L3T_zwVyk_Krn4dp33Up3TUoLFxFw4S_luyxlAg50h6mYoJzZaE/s1600-h/master+%2B+anointed.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhadYuMEHtI8EUTXkKHhcVEzd2GkRiCHcRA0W_FzCytQIowfFz-fTJ1JR4Ab1hwpLBSUjpcIXI_Ss6b43yGiXfq9Zl5L3T_zwVyk_Krn4dp33Up3TUoLFxFw4S_luyxlAg50h6mYoJzZaE/s320/master+%2B+anointed.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237563026564169986" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s that idiot kid Collin throwing pebbles in the Master’s pool…what’s that all about?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Creepy kid!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I hate him. “I’d annihilate her.” Geez, annihilate the slayer. How innovative! <em>Why didn’t they think of that before?</em><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nice misdirection here. Watch the human three run away from the other three! Look, three tough guys! No no, it’s this other three!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The three look like they belong in the Renaissance Faire.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Prithee, watchest how I slay yonder vampire with my poleaxe!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Heh heh. You said “pole.”<br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Prithee, watchest how I slay yonder vampire with my poleaxe!<br /></span><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander’s dancing looks like an epileptic fit. Like Elaine Benes.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Only better. No, more sugar induced.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> On the other hand, Cordelia does look like a hooker in that dress. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You like the dress, don’t you, sweetie?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You think she’s expensive?<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Guardian Angel</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nice kick. Running is a sign that the fight is going badly.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like the <em>Knight Rider</em> chase music in this scene. Very <em>Tangerine Dream</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He leaves that behind, doesn’t he? In the later episodes, the music changes.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It shows its age.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYjuKWmmdzdE0TP6NgoHc4FnpN5DLtX_JAP4vFoPekC1_u5VKlebBu1Uwf6r_1VicUvy3U0-J8GBGcaqggyG9_ER4ASKhu1vVL-cLR15fs0ZOEP02p-0zllOLJwHNvkr1lGlGE2euHG24/s1600-h/JoyceDeath.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYjuKWmmdzdE0TP6NgoHc4FnpN5DLtX_JAP4vFoPekC1_u5VKlebBu1Uwf6r_1VicUvy3U0-J8GBGcaqggyG9_ER4ASKhu1vVL-cLR15fs0ZOEP02p-0zllOLJwHNvkr1lGlGE2euHG24/s200/JoyceDeath.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237564725684172450" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The knowing wink, the nod…oh Joyce!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Doesn’t Buffy ever worry when her mother isn’t home?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s the slayer. She thinks she’s invulnerable.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The slayer’s mother is invulnerable?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh, I thought you meant worried her mother was going to barge in. But in both cases, apparently no.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Roommates</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Angel’s eager to get up those stairs.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He doesn’t waste any time. Buffy tells him to turn his back while she changes…Angel is no Xander!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m a little surprised she doesn’t have a beauty regimen before bed.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That is curious. I knew a girl in summer camp I swear she must have hung like a bat at night her hair was so big.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s called <em>Aquanet</em>, babe.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9H8ip9P-SNjgguILyiZbfjG-t235t1uoS8HYhQLRYTkqs3ZHVk9hUw_KmNY1kvqJbsNQJ6gRR3rUJ73eswEf6gHvQgB3NukY7Bfnns4tc6prNPPw33knPZw-XV_a_DboTt8W17deCFH8/s1600-h/aquanet+hair.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9H8ip9P-SNjgguILyiZbfjG-t235t1uoS8HYhQLRYTkqs3ZHVk9hUw_KmNY1kvqJbsNQJ6gRR3rUJ73eswEf6gHvQgB3NukY7Bfnns4tc6prNPPw33knPZw-XV_a_DboTt8W17deCFH8/s200/aquanet+hair.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237565296811122370" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “Wake up and smell the seduction.” Hee hee.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You like that line?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s true, you can smell sex.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Thank you for that. She was accosted by “three unusually virile vampires,” as Giles put it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That was kind of yucky.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>The Three</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Another misdirection. We think he’s maybe not going to kill the three. But he is.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, with power comes responsibility. Just like Spiderman. How do you think Spiderman would do in a fight with the Master?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’d win. The Spiderman would just shoot him with the web. Done and done.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Advanced Training</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It gets sad watching Giles get beat up all the time.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_aB90WVnUWxWagHwqbRfSOuqIYchu5a_-qeZqpVq2N3mL9JVkFgVwwy9WynFIsOy-5noVCoHSNDXLfZbY00gttym6JO1bO7GXOKqZ159JA6s1M4bxq1vYWD1mhcf1hu1RxpYDyLjU9ow/s1600-h/spidey+baby.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_aB90WVnUWxWagHwqbRfSOuqIYchu5a_-qeZqpVq2N3mL9JVkFgVwwy9WynFIsOy-5noVCoHSNDXLfZbY00gttym6JO1bO7GXOKqZ159JA6s1M4bxq1vYWD1mhcf1hu1RxpYDyLjU9ow/s200/spidey+baby.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237566766146649858" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like how dismissive Buffy is toward his fighting skills. “I’m not going to need pads to fight you,” she says. And she’s not going to be fighting Friar Tuck. Say, who do you think would win in a fight, Spiderman or Friar Tuck?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Again, I’m going to go with Spiderman. Who would win in a fight between Spiderman and Giles?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I believe Spiderman would lock Giles up in the library cage. Along with a note that said “Courtesy of your Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman.”<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>The Demon Lover</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They kiss! And Angel vamps out! It HAS been a long time.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How much older? Stop kissing and tell me!<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRK-gr1mlw4alMrQUxHCV6-JiQxdyZI0AG5osElUmB91zFOxQjlqRF1iUJqVEaLiD2tVR9OT9iiuMPQMuKod-6OauIY19JpkvBRkmb7aRioq67biwO4kLklohi_qmhhUyNzYjyWmBc4ZM/s1600-h/buffyKiss_150.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRK-gr1mlw4alMrQUxHCV6-JiQxdyZI0AG5osElUmB91zFOxQjlqRF1iUJqVEaLiD2tVR9OT9iiuMPQMuKod-6OauIY19JpkvBRkmb7aRioq67biwO4kLklohi_qmhhUyNzYjyWmBc4ZM/s200/buffyKiss_150.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237567345254280658" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> What did you think about the kissing?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Made me want to do some kissing.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That can be arranged. Who do you think would win in a kiss contest, Angel or Spiderman?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think the mask is a disadvantage.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Like One of Them</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I hate it when Xander explains things.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> At least it takes attention away from his ugly-ass shirt.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We need to get a scorecard. How many has it been now?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Too many to count. I think he made this one of a curtain. A ugly-ass curtain. What did you think about Cordelia’s Todd Oldham dress?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not really into polka dot anything. I kind of like it when Cordelia gives people a hard time.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I also like it when Cordelia gives people a hard time.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Of course you do.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It looks like Angel is staying at the Ramada.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nice pad. A little cementy for my tastes.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Darla does not look bad in the Catholic school girl uniform, I must say.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhC24ByngrPBYYE3ahO4tiAVhYNqXLKCqNR0YRp70dMgCbke1EyvkoRrENyZSVpsi6RqJNyYg1m8K7jAaaQYqrz2K8cYKZ8h1N1pKSSkXkBoCwxd_hy3VZFZ7T-giDYmgKXg-e6BwC3fSk/s1600-h/darla+guns.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhC24ByngrPBYYE3ahO4tiAVhYNqXLKCqNR0YRp70dMgCbke1EyvkoRrENyZSVpsi6RqJNyYg1m8K7jAaaQYqrz2K8cYKZ8h1N1pKSSkXkBoCwxd_hy3VZFZ7T-giDYmgKXg-e6BwC3fSk/s200/darla+guns.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237571837047827810" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Plus she really knows how to frame an argument. Very persuasive. And distracting.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s a classic. I love her raspy voice.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you notice that Darla speaks with a lisp when she vamps out?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’d think she’d have gotten used to those fangs in 400 years.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Angelus</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles says Angel is a “vicious, violent animal.” Harsh.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I have a feeling Giles says that about all the vampires.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, he’s kind of a bigot.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Darla’s Plan</h3><br /><span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />I’ve got nothing. <em>You </em>have a go at it.<br /></span><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So the plan is to get Angel to kill Buffy and come back to the fold?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m not sure how well thought-out this plan is. That’s asking a lot.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m guessing the Master is really out of ideas at this point, since he’s letting his minions have a crack at it. He probably said, “I’ve got nothing. <em>You </em>have a go at it.” <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How come Buffy didn’t sense Darla in the library? She’s usually very good at that kind of thing.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s distracted. You know, Darla looks through a lot of windows in this episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s a peeping demon.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Invitation to a Vampire</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “It’s very nice of you to invite me into your home” Nice delivery on that line.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Very fraught with verbal irony. Do you catch that, honey?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes, I did pick up on that.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>To Kill an Angel</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Boy, the teachers really do care in this town.” <em>Shut up</em>, Joyce!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Her character has the dumbest lines.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Think Joss is trying to make us want to smack her silly? I sure do feel like it whenever she opens her gob.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why don’t you visit hospitals? You’re a teacher.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why would I want to do that? I don’t like people.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Two-Gun Vampire</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Joyce making with the dopey again. “That school is amazing” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Wahn wahn wahn <em>waaaaahn</em>. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> My god, woman, shut up!<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not the last time Buffy and Angel go at it in the arena.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Let’s get it done,” says Angel. Rock on!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Wouldn’t the fumigation be overpowering?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, she’s superhuman, and he doesn’t breathe. You know, this reminds me of the way we fight, what with the crossbows and the punching…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> …then I run you through with a sword…<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Good times.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCF_cLK8zcg1yNNJ_jje34pn_NnTDfdQktTn0aNBIKzInWlHL4R4JvD64RyuiVGSH_f0z9k1RuaBRU439st2mv6Uu3Qk1Uj_xLybz-_oqpdpJ-QhK87nVf9KAfbkbZ4dZplavMPcQhDk8/s1600-h/gypsy_sorcery.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCF_cLK8zcg1yNNJ_jje34pn_NnTDfdQktTn0aNBIKzInWlHL4R4JvD64RyuiVGSH_f0z9k1RuaBRU439st2mv6Uu3Qk1Uj_xLybz-_oqpdpJ-QhK87nVf9KAfbkbZ4dZplavMPcQhDk8/s200/gypsy_sorcery.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237579911541115874" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Clearly Angel’s got some serious self-image problems.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s fun to remember for the first time his story about his origins. We’ve seen it over and over, but he never explained it until the seventh episode.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> By the way, Buffy, don’t mess with the GYPSIES!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Heck yeah. They’ll turn you into a sad sack.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ooh la la, how many skirts does Darla have? Hooray! This one’s <em>red</em>!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I wish I understood your fixation with that.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If you have to ask, you’ll never know.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How many guns actually show up in the Buffy series?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Seen or used?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Used.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Not many. And never again for this duration, I think. Darla really goes to town.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s for sure. “Buffy, it wasn’t Angel who attacked your mom…” “Sorry! Can’t hear you over all the <em>gunfire</em>!”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Definitely an argument for a seven-day waiting period.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Here Angel stakes Darla. I forgot she got taken out so early.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And she does the hurt double-take: “Angel?” Like it’s such a shocker.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They were together for generations, though. Oh well. Darla is ded.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> For now. <br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Walk Away…</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8Cd_fHcmLLPjfOrKZcLiyNr8HkwesETXZFId7GEG0MTSQmmvuGoCpIeLZO9GCX9Jr1ikMA-ImjjqqttS1R5wGVUQUinBw3qDVK0_nlA6Je_Iss4dzMHIHkgGYBOHHNqDmDq3LrMjgpyU/s1600-h/courtship-of-eddies-father.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8Cd_fHcmLLPjfOrKZcLiyNr8HkwesETXZFId7GEG0MTSQmmvuGoCpIeLZO9GCX9Jr1ikMA-ImjjqqttS1R5wGVUQUinBw3qDVK0_nlA6Je_Iss4dzMHIHkgGYBOHHNqDmDq3LrMjgpyU/s200/courtship-of-eddies-father.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5237580853931461154" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look, the Master is all smashy. He’s upset!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> At least he still has the creepy kid.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ah, look at Collin lead the Master away…it’s like <em>The Courtship of Eddie’s father</em>.<br />People let me tell you bout my best friend…<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Uh oh. She burned him with her crucifix! Didn’t they know it was there?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There was no smoke.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A smokeless crucifix?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Dammit, the Japanese beat us again!<br /><br />Next time: <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/09/i-robotyou-jane.html"><font color=yellow>I Robot...You Jane</font color></a><br /><br />P.S. a bonus Spike scene from <em>Angel</em>. Hilarious.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/_G9ugMJL5A8&color1=11645361&color2=13619151&fs=1"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/_G9ugMJL5A8&color1=11645361&color2=13619151&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-1334232450898416412008-08-09T21:12:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:25:51.384-07:00The Pack“The Pack”<br />8/9/08<br /><br />In this episode, Xander heeds the call of the wild, gets his glower on, and becomes the second person to sneak up on Buffy twice. You go!<br /><br /><h3>The Hyena’s Call</h3><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9LzZReUmT13U7Yrvz9NSjtAYP_AVq6zGhx-fbK97BvAfA3Tuqqoke-xqVaPCIKhuVXZopJMEgkqt_CIrNUDaoVEYkHJRW5bcjvb5pyowXd0RxZ_Z_t_aZZgpOFHwXZXGfLWpWAxrHmss/s1600-h/the+pack1.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9LzZReUmT13U7Yrvz9NSjtAYP_AVq6zGhx-fbK97BvAfA3Tuqqoke-xqVaPCIKhuVXZopJMEgkqt_CIrNUDaoVEYkHJRW5bcjvb5pyowXd0RxZ_Z_t_aZZgpOFHwXZXGfLWpWAxrHmss/s200/the+pack1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5232745560454061170" /></a><br /><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nice barrier to keep the people out of the quarantine.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It says “positively” no admittance. Don’t think they’re not serious!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Don’t question the zoo’s sincerity.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Nice rainbow on Xander’s sweater. This is consistent with my theory about Xander’s sexuality.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh yes, because he’s a Rainbow Boy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He’s not too Rainbow Bright, though.<br /> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You know what Xander’s thinking, looking at those hyenas?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Those hyenas flashed their brights at me!<br /><br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />He's not too Rainbow Bright.<br /></span><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Scary Xander is kind of sexy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Brings Vampire Xander of “The Wish” to mind.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Wait! We haven’t had the opening credits yet? I thought the credits were ages ago.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It was an unusually long opening. They should have had an episode that was entirely pre-opening credits. Then show the opening credits, and then BOOM! closing credits. Grr. Arrgh.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>A New Xander</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think Joss should have left Xander possessed for seven seasons.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You can only have so many bad boys on one show. He’s like a foil to Buffy, an impotent male—<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Heh. You said impotent.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> —to her potent female. What are you, eight?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Apparently girls like it when guys look them up and down. Is that true?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Umm, I’ve never noticed a man looking me up and down except for you.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, I <em>am</em> mean and dangerous. Why are you laughing?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re so cute.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Look at the size of that croissant! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They look yummy<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Everything was bigger in the 90’s<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Everything tasted better.<br /><br /><blockquote><font color=yellow>Xander: [Laughs at the rest of the pack making fun of an overweight student. Looks at a horrified Buffy.] Kid’s fat.</font color></blockquote><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Best moment of the episode, in my opinion.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That was pretty funny. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s the way he says it. Like…<em>duh. </em><br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>The Mascot</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Herbert the Pig goes through a lot in this scene.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtpOw35zRJ8l3r3lY4TJYQNrYa_-jHbh6fyZl5HjMmG07iGBqgsjiyWJHCxL0Y9VEvcOo52FTUpNuoY5fjBqTv5vhxN-jxcixCP6JFW8CGvHcQvoTUVLQ9n51LXidl0Gmn_yxQxu_iZqE/s1600-h/the+pack2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtpOw35zRJ8l3r3lY4TJYQNrYa_-jHbh6fyZl5HjMmG07iGBqgsjiyWJHCxL0Y9VEvcOo52FTUpNuoY5fjBqTv5vhxN-jxcixCP6JFW8CGvHcQvoTUVLQ9n51LXidl0Gmn_yxQxu_iZqE/s200/the+pack2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5232747112295974082" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That pig is a good actor.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He really had screen presence.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was feeling his fear.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I was feeling his shame.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander’s normal shame, or the pig’s shame?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The pig, actually.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Dodge Ball</h3><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHlBs6blC4S6ARUefRtlmeFPAEIyAGGNRR9AySdZLpYCBjkK4SkzrZ3R4N5YGX7h49BKOReIesFwWVMZpUH-9sXJOiv9ct24pCZp2NjhDkxqM5Vnlufqp4qAcgOnLR-4x3fEkB_IeFr0Q/s1600-h/dodgeball.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHlBs6blC4S6ARUefRtlmeFPAEIyAGGNRR9AySdZLpYCBjkK4SkzrZ3R4N5YGX7h49BKOReIesFwWVMZpUH-9sXJOiv9ct24pCZp2NjhDkxqM5Vnlufqp4qAcgOnLR-4x3fEkB_IeFr0Q/s200/dodgeball.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5232748050397715778" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I tried to get out as soon as possible during dodgeball.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I never got hit, but someone always managed to catch my dodgeball when I threw.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’d always get hit, and the teacher always tried to act upset when the kid standing two feet away got waylaid by the ball.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> One time I got hit so hard it turned one side of my face brick red. The other side was pale. I looked like Hel, the Finnish god.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Really?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You have no idea who that is. Some of these guys were cheating.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWbzHZnHuH5-qOg7OLHeIa06o4lvostAFP2DG_7JrrngKrStVc3FVxqzd7wIPBaMHi8UNMxPaISiFHnBg3ivxBJkijPoDL2Mc9JtIEerzmv6hszjrM4qus-7gkFeufalqLQZSLouQeEvA/s1600-h/hel.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWbzHZnHuH5-qOg7OLHeIa06o4lvostAFP2DG_7JrrngKrStVc3FVxqzd7wIPBaMHi8UNMxPaISiFHnBg3ivxBJkijPoDL2Mc9JtIEerzmv6hszjrM4qus-7gkFeufalqLQZSLouQeEvA/s200/hel.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5232748944834878914" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I noticed that too. That and their gym class lasted about 20 seconds.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I saw one who didn’t sit down when dude caught the ball.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Shame!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What did you think when Xander tagged Willow?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think Willow had every right to stomp off mad. She knows she’s being abused.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think she’s being a baby. It’s dodgeball! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She knows something’s wrong with Xander. The fact that Xander threw the ball at her hard proves it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But’s it’s <em>dodgeball!</em><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So they turn on Lance! Who’s on their team.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t think they really understood the rules of dodgeball.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Let’s Do Lunch</h3><br /><br /><blockquote><font color=yellow>Xander [to Willow]: I won’t have to look at your pasty face again! </font color></blockquote><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Whitey to whitey, I find her complexion very nice.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Later on though, they make her wear a bronzer.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is that related to the clothes thing? They had to make her more fashionable?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t know. That’s <em>your</em> axe to grind.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s not my axe, I just notice.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Something Weird</h3><br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Did he learn that in hyena school?<br /></span><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I know it’s a stale gimmick, but I love the slow-mo shot of the pack coming up over the stairs.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ah, the walk. It’s a classic.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t think where else I’ve seen it. They did it in Old School, but that came a lot later. Did you notice they’re all dressing in black and dark colors?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He decides to be cool, and therefore also to dress cool. Did he learn that in Hyena School?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When they weren’t teaching geometry?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He took People Calling.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Probably Advanced Fear Smelling.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Introductory Preying on the Weak.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Comparative Taunting?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There is a good selection of songs in this episode. They really help set the mood. It reminds me of <em>The Faculty. </em><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLIAES3TLYRb4HofvPNYPFWQPF3LYULcu0i_MgVasjFraIheylrro-cmQH-CgXOHKgkiny7CnxmWbQwsxcRFBrOze4JAnMHhMjfYLFhD5HXeN8LtImixJfU9Pfc79CZgMQUE6-CgVK3VY/s1600-h/the+faculty.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLIAES3TLYRb4HofvPNYPFWQPF3LYULcu0i_MgVasjFraIheylrro-cmQH-CgXOHKgkiny7CnxmWbQwsxcRFBrOze4JAnMHhMjfYLFhD5HXeN8LtImixJfU9Pfc79CZgMQUE6-CgVK3VY/s200/the+faculty.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233019251196695298" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did I see <em>The Faculty? </em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It was the one where it turns out all the high school teachers are evil monsters. Sound familiar?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Then I’m guessing you didn’t see it.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What is a dode patrol?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t know. I was wondering that, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dode">Urban Dictionary</a>, here I come!<br /><br /><blockquote><font color=orange>[Editor's note: Yikes!]</font color></blockquote><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do principals usually bawl out students in clumps?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The smart ones don’t. And never by themselves. Think of it as interviewing suspects. You want to interview them separately in order to— <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Suss out what happened?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s right, Spike. <br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Animal Possession</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles says that only the most predatory are of interest to animals. That’s an intriguing statement.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They teased with the picture. I wanted to see the picture.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkRq1GUV9KeT-Hieq_cIjSRkkyKC631VpbJ2ilKNTcp5I_OR4zFObD5eyiRAuQqbiuBHZnwJBCuxq97DaSAjUIvDnKD77CQNj3_sk11aVhIWVMeHOe2l-efTI6lxl0Fk8M7ZgZZKgtRsc/s1600-h/dore+1.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkRq1GUV9KeT-Hieq_cIjSRkkyKC631VpbJ2ilKNTcp5I_OR4zFObD5eyiRAuQqbiuBHZnwJBCuxq97DaSAjUIvDnKD77CQNj3_sk11aVhIWVMeHOe2l-efTI6lxl0Fk8M7ZgZZKgtRsc/s200/dore+1.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233021267120669186" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The picture of what?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What happens if they don’t repossess the people. I don’t know. Transpossess.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It was probably just another Gustave Dore drawing.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Just another Dore drawing. Ho hum.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Dangerous & Mean</h3><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Are you keeping score? Xander sneaks up on Buffy again.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Check the counter to the right. Good thing Xander isn’t dangerous.<br /><br /><blockquote><font color=yellow>Xander: You like your men dangerous. Dangerous and mean.</font color></blockquote><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s unfair. We don’t know yet that Angel is mean.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Based on his current activity level, we don’t even know he’s dangerous.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Odd that he would say that.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Getting ahead of yourself, Xander.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The more I scare you, the better you smell, says Xander.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Urine smells good to him?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Boo! I was thinking sweat.<br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You really have to feel sorry for Flutie when he gets eaten. He’s so clueless.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It was really kind of unfair. It’s the second faculty person to have died at Sunnydale High.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfwgK0qYOQUA8U1IdFqcQi7ZhICgQ928x_lc7Kt6nMjkWfDW51Sk6m-8YoRPkSXunKt468PVKmRV2_XzxdqRJKA-G3BmMXHP0WFUfvkAdnWqk5kdx8nfBpnRx5Ko0Psl21ttbZrSIx1E0/s1600-h/flutieicon.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfwgK0qYOQUA8U1IdFqcQi7ZhICgQ928x_lc7Kt6nMjkWfDW51Sk6m-8YoRPkSXunKt468PVKmRV2_XzxdqRJKA-G3BmMXHP0WFUfvkAdnWqk5kdx8nfBpnRx5Ko0Psl21ttbZrSIx1E0/s200/flutieicon.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233031452041977266" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> There’s the science teacher, Dr. Gregory, the one that Buffy liked. I wonder if they riffed his position. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It was <em>science! </em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So?<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Looking For a Cure</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> If Xander ripped through the pig cage, why should the library cage hold him?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m not really sure why there would be a cage in the library in the first place.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzKBTDG96H6SSsxBjlzrFBQitf2XkUGi5Mrz4DSYm8Iqavi881VvOK2_UgwEsJVyaSU8yb9G7tsO2Sz_fF135qD-gmxNx_TClncPS6JyrWys2Mko4kz7S2O_MK1NS38Klrj4EEUsypHcA/s1600-h/library+cage.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzKBTDG96H6SSsxBjlzrFBQitf2XkUGi5Mrz4DSYm8Iqavi881VvOK2_UgwEsJVyaSU8yb9G7tsO2Sz_fF135qD-gmxNx_TClncPS6JyrWys2Mko4kz7S2O_MK1NS38Klrj4EEUsypHcA/s200/library+cage.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233024927541721714" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe they keep their private collection there. Like a secret library stash. I know how you guys are.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Help Me…</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hyena Xander is even more high-strung than regular Xander.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Poor Willow. Stay alert, stay alive!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So they will track the missing member of their pack? Why aren’t they already at the library? Oh, here they are.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cool jump through the window.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The hyenas scream like monkies. They shredded that cage. Do they reinforce it later in the series? A lot of dangerous people got locked up in there.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ooh, we should do a cage count.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay, Xander’s the first.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>Prey of the Pack</h3><br /><br /><blockquote><font color=yellow>Buffy: They’re tough, but they’re getting stupider.</font color></blockquote><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They’re not the only ones.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> There’s a lot of words she could have used instead. Like <em>ignoranter. </em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Gullibiler. </em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> If hyenas were part dog, couldn’t Buffy have just used a red rubber ball?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Only if it were attached to a fishing pole with a toy mouse. They’re also part cat.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You could put catnip in the red rubber ball.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You are a criminal mastermind.<br /><span style="float:left;width:150px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />If hyenas were part dog, couldn't Buffy have just used a red rubber ball?<br /></span><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Of course, Masai ceremonial garb.” Come on, come on…put it together, Giles.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> If Giles gets knocked out again, I think I get BINGO. Didn’t Amy’s mom knock him out, too? Isn’t this knockout #2 for Tweedster?<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>PredatoryActs</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh I get it now…the bullies at the beginning were a predatory act and they bogarded the zookeeper’s Hyena spell.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s how it happened. So does Willow offer her wrists to anyone who wants to tie her up?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s a lot gullibiler than your average high school student.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><br /><h3>The Superior Xander</h3><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander ate a pig, a raw pig. That’s a tough one to get over.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think Xander is faking not remembering, and yes! he is.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHwPcjM4SZx3V78RgaRXnwLf2RjYl1XdlYwU856d0NAK9B8YRxI-jDrpVhsUmbRPhxV7HcwrbViK41nMnqVkWK_ZfbeXsxlEe4rk3oMOrFjPP3lVS4OxkKVJdgYqJIOJOKQK5EKb1ievg/s1600-h/buffyhat.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHwPcjM4SZx3V78RgaRXnwLf2RjYl1XdlYwU856d0NAK9B8YRxI-jDrpVhsUmbRPhxV7HcwrbViK41nMnqVkWK_ZfbeXsxlEe4rk3oMOrFjPP3lVS4OxkKVJdgYqJIOJOKQK5EKb1ievg/s200/buffyhat.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5233030894348747538" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I want to know what the heck kind of hat is Buffy wearing. Is she on her way to a liquor store holdup?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought she had turned into a cat burglar.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Your secret dies with me,” says Giles. I wish that shirt would die with you, Xander.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why would Giles choose to keep a secret for Xander?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think that Giles would probably just groan or roll his eyes and walk away from him.<br /><br />Next time: <font color=lime><a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/08/angel.html">“Angel”</a></font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-24028568546228200582008-08-08T11:29:00.000-07:002008-08-08T11:35:46.719-07:00World Debut of "Angel"A shiny, shiny day!<br /><br />2 junior Hellmouthers, Susie Jones, 6, and Bob Cutler, 4, worked with Ghost Dogg to produce the following tribute video to a scene from from the 1st Season episode of BtVS "Angel." This also happens to be the duo's debut Internet performance.<br /><br />Enjoy!<br /><br /><embed id="VideoPlayback" style="width:400px;height:326px" allowFullScreen="true" src="http://video.google.com/googleplayer.swf?docid=-5590600460136420212&hl=en&fs=true" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"> </embed>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-87411046381463212832008-08-06T08:07:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:26:28.726-07:00Never Kill a Boy On the First DateIn "Never Kill a Boy On the First Date" Buffy balances fighting the forces of darkness with her interest in sensitive Owen. In this episode we learn about effective classroom sarcasm, successful bus driving techniques, and <em>moobies</em>.<br /><br />8/5/08<br /><br /><h2><strong>A Time of Crisis</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles says Buffy’s execution is “adequate.” That she should “plunge and move on.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She never does that in the entire series.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy from “The Wish” did. She was kind of joyless, though.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No <em>joie de slay.</em><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZ7yBwzyBEfnX3NcvqC1Mji-xV7bZYFRp1Xt355n9Dv99UECQFhSzMZtsE-184aUyaajS9AsFq8clPYgY-T4VqXDsnmFh53ZeIG18xj8xSrRDpRcAY9ipjOzQXOH5dn4E5VJkVTqqDR3U/s1600-h/Buffy-Tarot.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZ7yBwzyBEfnX3NcvqC1Mji-xV7bZYFRp1Xt355n9Dv99UECQFhSzMZtsE-184aUyaajS9AsFq8clPYgY-T4VqXDsnmFh53ZeIG18xj8xSrRDpRcAY9ipjOzQXOH5dn4E5VJkVTqqDR3U/s200/Buffy-Tarot.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231425888740332914" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love rings. Is this church?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay, the vamp leaves behind a ring. Usually the vampire’s stuff poofs, too.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe they don’t usually bother to go through the vampire’s stuff.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This whole thing troubles me. What poofs and what doesn’t? What are the rules? Does it have to belong to the vampire? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Metal stuff doesn’t poof.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes it does. Belt buckles. Earrings. Jewelry. Sometimes even weapons.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do fillings poof?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe it poofs if it belonged to the vampire. But what if a vampire borrowed a sweater?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Poof!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What if a vampire got staked in a car he owned?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is he <em>wearing</em> the car?<br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Man, the Master likes to read. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s really wasting his breath on those yuck-yucks. It’s like he sired a bunch of yokels from Appalachia to be his minions.<br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />He's really wasting his breath on those yuck-yucks.<br /></span><font color=red>HE:</font color> “As it is written, so shall it be.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Enough already.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Here endeth the lesson.” Say, Buffy says that in Season 7 when she’s speechifying all over the place.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh, that was a <em>lesson</em>. Wasn’t church after all. <br /><hr /><br /><br /><h2><strong>Owen</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I love that dress and she wears it well.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The green and white number?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Mm-hmm.<br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So Owen Thurman reads Emily Dickinson? Where is it, he asks. How about look under D for dumbass?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We’re supposed to believe he’s a scholar and he can’t find Dickinson in the library?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg9lBBOyMZkzztG4iY0b_7-mX_uD8UYdqN9HnUhHIonpkv_YcT1G7rGUf0nkoO_coaRUgDKhtqdZ2YCbFzsGHNYbD3BpZQ1kZfS0v74SkduB1qopnVEQChc3m2gixxuKrpc-ksPW2yeI8/s1600-h/emily+d.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg9lBBOyMZkzztG4iY0b_7-mX_uD8UYdqN9HnUhHIonpkv_YcT1G7rGUf0nkoO_coaRUgDKhtqdZ2YCbFzsGHNYbD3BpZQ1kZfS0v74SkduB1qopnVEQChc3m2gixxuKrpc-ksPW2yeI8/s200/emily+d.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231433158782430418" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you know you can sing her poetry to the Theme from <em>Gilligan’s Island</em>?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sweetie, I think you can sing half of the canon to <em>Gilligan’s Island</em>. Solitary, mysterious. Sounds like you, honey.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What did you think about Cordelia cutting Buffy off in the cafeteria?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Man, she just won’t let it go. She has goals.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Cordelia’s hips are wider than I thought!” I’ll have to remember that one.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That was a good one.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love it when they’re catty with each other.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>A Violent Prophecy</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The Advent of Septus. Do you have to buy gifts for that one?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t know seven even had a holiday. No one told me.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When I first heard it, I thought he said <em>sepsis</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t know horrible medical conditions had a holiday either.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m just hoping there’s no Advent of Septic.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “The dark forces are aligning against us!” Whoa, calm down there, Giles!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh, that’s old hat. Dark forces are always aligning themselves against them.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’d think they’d be pretty much parallel by now.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLNsdo2067z7Zh3DCkzjU9DgozciPjcy_5lhbL-k9xQ5V2oEyzqVgpVRGnLCuwEcQe3XYiLftR1Fofy0DylcN4SqWU3IaUkn8IGGo49_17xhn5N7lEAbFvsZ_MpCZ0egzsSWyju-E0UGM/s1600-h/tony+tiger.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLNsdo2067z7Zh3DCkzjU9DgozciPjcy_5lhbL-k9xQ5V2oEyzqVgpVRGnLCuwEcQe3XYiLftR1Fofy0DylcN4SqWU3IaUkn8IGGo49_17xhn5N7lEAbFvsZ_MpCZ0egzsSWyju-E0UGM/s200/tony+tiger.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231433720193430306" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ooh! Tiger coat!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think that coat is gr-r-r-r-reat! <em>Get it?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Mmm.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You know, Tony the Tiger?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Funnyman, making with the jokes. <br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>Five Shall Die</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I like the misdirection in this scene. We’re led to think bible-quoting man—Borba—is the Big Nasty in this episode. What kind of name is Borba, anyway?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m telling you—Foothills of Tennessee or Kentucky. One of those made-up names.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Actually, I don’t think his name is ever mentioned. I think we only read it on the subtitles.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They say it. <em>Giles</em> says it. This guy Borba was wanted for double homicide. And for standing up on the bus.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh yeah. I wonder how I missed that.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe if you weren’t so busy thinking up your next joke.<br /> <br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>Another Chance</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordelia is still working it. Even though she got dissed at lunch.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Owen is tall! Or Cordelia is short. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When he looks at Angel, he doesn’t look down.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s so hard to tell how tall people are on TV.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAYErw1mzzGe2FDMm7L1UbAQw_qT0PfjjcwRdLpl1EHsHhHUgbOHywnpPQ74qxnLHQefBKWTbCIFpnEQ0VZJVl4z9RxQpVspD-XSntHGO8OugyKRBHuPEjpMecodqFgt-SZUmRGbmGGNk/s1600-h/homo+sex.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAYErw1mzzGe2FDMm7L1UbAQw_qT0PfjjcwRdLpl1EHsHhHUgbOHywnpPQ74qxnLHQefBKWTbCIFpnEQ0VZJVl4z9RxQpVspD-XSntHGO8OugyKRBHuPEjpMecodqFgt-SZUmRGbmGGNk/s200/homo+sex.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231434572486255970" /></a><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sylvester Stallone is only five feet tall.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And Tom Cruise is only three feet tall.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Pale horse, judgment bringing fire, sin is a liquid all around…this is like one of those guys who walk around downtown with the handwritten “HOMO SEX IS SIN” signs and pass out the hate pamphlets with all the misspellings. And they never shut up.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yep, I’m willing to stand with the righteous. Unless I have to get on the shortbus.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s people like that who make me want to avoid public transportation.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> One time I was on this bus with my German friend and there was this guy who tried to chat me and her up. He said his name was “Cool Breeze.” All of a sudden, my friend couldn’t speak any English and <em>I</em> had to talk to him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t believe I’ve never heard this story before. What other nuggets do you have?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Wouldn’t <em>you</em> like to know?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dude runs over a vampire…and <em>then</em> swerves off the road into a tree. What the heck.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Just horrible.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I mean, did the driver feel so bad he couldn’t handle the wheel anymore?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> See, even the little people can prevent apocalypses. Just keep going and say it was a squirrel.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Remind me never to ride <em>your</em> bus.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re fine <em>on</em> the bus, just don’t walk on the road in front of me.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUh9sPGrkLeFs-kDTW9YPr7m11JTmR4c1dlt-Lve1a_5wKEa1XUoclyxVSJ0_TvYI6eN_nueZBQSKZZMCIjIRSM0jbEgA7GZyTMaSrPTQfwxak4LP10FFepyXPW0z5V-Lh0c7QTO-vNow/s1600-h/master.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUh9sPGrkLeFs-kDTW9YPr7m11JTmR4c1dlt-Lve1a_5wKEa1XUoclyxVSJ0_TvYI6eN_nueZBQSKZZMCIjIRSM0jbEgA7GZyTMaSrPTQfwxak4LP10FFepyXPW0z5V-Lh0c7QTO-vNow/s200/master.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231435777869564242" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay, this prophecy officially sucks. It specifically said “out of the ashes.” Where were the ashes? It was just vampires killing people like they always do. They said out of the ashes.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe the ashtray tipped over when the driver wrecked the bus.<br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander’s shirt is making me seasick. Looks like he has a bunch of lollipops stuck to his shirt.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander’s shirt is horrible. But it’s the combo. The puke-green shirt with the beige pants? I don’t think the costumer liked Nicholas much. But I like the watch.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5bfSKXEDH-UwvaKpU4c-pim4iT4hadKwmTbkobHr08nYccdYAQJZ2cNdsrMf1cyCYtY_US1FEnoS34ZamuOmGiWxllr3oyvchOZQD8TQSiRvESbRV3ODvQolRpwNOqJcxIee9w64Uwsg/s1600-h/xander+watch.bmp"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5bfSKXEDH-UwvaKpU4c-pim4iT4hadKwmTbkobHr08nYccdYAQJZ2cNdsrMf1cyCYtY_US1FEnoS34ZamuOmGiWxllr3oyvchOZQD8TQSiRvESbRV3ODvQolRpwNOqJcxIee9w64Uwsg/s200/xander+watch.bmp" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231436852589853794" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander’s Tweetybird watch? Yup, he’s gay.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh <em>hello!</em> Well, Joss was toying around with the idea of making Xander gay instead of Willow.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That would never have flown.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So he made Xander <em>act</em> gay?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordy’s “kind of grabby,” according to Owen.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m not sure why the girls are fighting over him.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> As long as he’s brooding, I think he’s golden. Then he opens his mouth, and game over.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He should be more like you?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It is what it is, yo.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> [groans]<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>The Big Date</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why is Xander in Buffy’s room giving advice on Buffy’s clothing? Buffy doesn’t even ask him to leave the room when she undresses.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, What’s up with that?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think we <em>know</em> what’s up with that.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She thinks he’s gay.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Exactly. If a girl doesn’t view a guy as a threat in that situation, he’s either too young, too old, too related, or too “not that there’s anything <em>wrong</em> with that.”<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes! Superlibrarian!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The Man in Tweed goes to Buffy’s house this time. Plus he’s brought reading material.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> A rousing tale about a double red herring, I mean <em>homicide</em>.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnLseDXdHTfWDZjFguW4a9ReDqWrqSWOaWRIC9SGdI_uZrroDlJUm0RWw13Xe4y_km0cY549XdoJV2VmWuvvKVHld0rt6NXdPp7FUFLNEtzYWrKdMrvwjXyxDqyWN4Nsp1YRwfrxNYkho/s1600-h/giles+toy.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnLseDXdHTfWDZjFguW4a9ReDqWrqSWOaWRIC9SGdI_uZrroDlJUm0RWw13Xe4y_km0cY549XdoJV2VmWuvvKVHld0rt6NXdPp7FUFLNEtzYWrKdMrvwjXyxDqyWN4Nsp1YRwfrxNYkho/s200/giles+toy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231438269223866210" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Relax, Giles! She’s taking a pager, everything’s fine!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Then we find out Giles doesn’t know how to use the pager.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What’s to use? You call it like it’s a phone.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So? The man can’t turn on a computer.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Infernal miniaturized machines!<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>Giles in Danger</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That singer looks like a female Alice Cooper.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Only not so hard on the eyes.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s <em>your</em> opinion. And yet she’s married.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Seems like only yesterday we were at the Bronze.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Seriously, I think she's a tranny.<br /><br />VELVET CHAIN "Buffy"<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/33j4plk3frU&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/33j4plk3frU&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, the book on Owen is that he’s “quiet, sequestered, and uneventful” and finds most girls “frivolous.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Frivolous? Okay, Owen needs to come out of the closet.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No wonder Xander doesn’t like him. Or should I say, “doesn’t like him.” <br /><br /><blockquote><font color=yellow>Cordelia: “Look at you here, all alone.”</font color></blockquote><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Ha!</em> Love it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s so mean. You’re memorizing her lines, aren’t you?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> With a little tweaking, I can totally use them in class.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re going to be mean to mean to your students, Cordelia-style? The weaker ones will wilt and die.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> As it written, so shall it be.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When Cordelia says, “When you’re ready for the big leagues, let me know,” it sounds vaguely slutty.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Vaguely?</em> <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Must be the baseball metaphor. And the earlier reference to Cordelia’s “wide hips.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’d say you think too much, but I really don’t think that’s the problem.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles is right to be spooked being at the mausoleum all by his solitary<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> In the dark. In the middle of the cemetery. I don’t think Giles should go in there.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Get out the crucifix, dude!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Meanwhile, I love this band! They’ve been playing for like the whole show.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Apparently no files in the file cabinet. Lazy coroners!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m thinking if Giles can move it, it’s not going to bar the door very well.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Turns out it didn’t. Oh, and here’s Xander and Willow appearing at the window like wacky neighbors.<br /><span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Here's Xander and Willow appearing at the window like wacky neighbors.<br /></span><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>The Strangest Girl</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Owen should ask Angel about Emily Dickinson. He probably knew her. Or ate her father, or something.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And nothing’s going on right now. Just Giles dying at the funeral home.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, it’s an efficient arrangement, at any rate.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why doesn’t Angel go with to the funeral home to help?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It really isn’t addressed. He’s trying to be all cryptic and mysterious, but instead he just looks really lazy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He came to reprimand her for being at the Bronze.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She forgot to thank him for the nonspecific warning about the vague threat.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6KuobiQw0dAxPwDG3D1o6y7-IlzCdrkNrelDg6XzqTgH2SMbtN3O8fQxZnvHztAsuhDwVr2eioP5cSpDZwqAbqdRGCezSsjfDWTVjI7MEtoses401esxS8RRIUfNyDmKP2AmdSF269jI/s1600-h/owen.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6KuobiQw0dAxPwDG3D1o6y7-IlzCdrkNrelDg6XzqTgH2SMbtN3O8fQxZnvHztAsuhDwVr2eioP5cSpDZwqAbqdRGCezSsjfDWTVjI7MEtoses401esxS8RRIUfNyDmKP2AmdSF269jI/s200/owen.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231451001787252802" /></a><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>Fun at the Funeral Home</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I think Owen likes the funeral home a bit too much.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Makes me wonder what other sexual deviances he has.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Speaking of which, Giles had to lie on top of a body to wait out the vamps.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No. Don’t. <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIwz9tbuj0bkV2A03N4CiZHwM5f99zp45WlkxgZNh9g27-kNe8Lmaz3cVBsSr8tODOrd9sglgpezPPz3qnGF6LpVtw7knO66hwCbx3fAwMFQASnTXx0tgUAT49mfrx5Wafk-QfY7khKl8/s1600-h/toe+tag.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIwz9tbuj0bkV2A03N4CiZHwM5f99zp45WlkxgZNh9g27-kNe8Lmaz3cVBsSr8tODOrd9sglgpezPPz3qnGF6LpVtw7knO66hwCbx3fAwMFQASnTXx0tgUAT49mfrx5Wafk-QfY7khKl8/s200/toe+tag.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231440591614302546" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> I wonder if the corpse had an erection. Sometimes that happens. If so, how uncomfortable!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Eww!</em> <br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When they’re piling up all that stuff, what good is the lampshade going to do?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a barring the door convention. You have to stack stuff.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>Any</em> stuff?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, you got to put the light stuff on top. It’s the Aesthetics of Stacking.<span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />It's the Aesthetics of Stacking.<br /></span><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>He is Risen</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Classic scene. Guy rising from the autopsy table.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Do dead bodies usually move</em>, asks Owen. You’re a dumbass.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “I have been judged.” Let’s check out his moobies.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Moobies?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Man boobies! Didn’t you check out his moobies? You’ve been on that <a href="http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/">douchebag site</a> for half a year, and you didn’t notice them? I checked them out, and I didn’t even want to.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc5-319xVuh6BcMGkFaxOcmmKXoNjKrvf6AdUO-CsyYUFmPWnACzSQ7AJwBghhVgw46f6vVi8RSPC-0YBI1FLvMuekvAp38gnvkG-7KeGz1kzGYhN3W44Tp6Iibvs_tasRXGONSjIMs3c/s1600-h/lachey-300x300.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc5-319xVuh6BcMGkFaxOcmmKXoNjKrvf6AdUO-CsyYUFmPWnACzSQ7AJwBghhVgw46f6vVi8RSPC-0YBI1FLvMuekvAp38gnvkG-7KeGz1kzGYhN3W44Tp6Iibvs_tasRXGONSjIMs3c/s200/lachey-300x300.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231442104258792226" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This guy totally reminds me of Luke. He headbutts the glass, and starts talking Pentecostal like Robert DeNiro in <em>Cape Fear</em>. “He is risen in me. He fills my head with song. Pork and beans. Pork and beans.” What the heck?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I was scared.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>An Unusual First Date</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No Ben and Jerry’s for this couple, just a lonely walk home.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> As far as dates go, I think that was a success.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No one died. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Mooby guy did.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLcj9MYgEJIjbP6lYtPRXLvHELzJMdvRSPffKFDKfgDjER9aMk1QMSPzFQlXFhE87fS51cfLyAPrXn5Qx_2G7LBn_UHIVe6bfLq1kEwyYBUFZ-KYkXyEPWSi0Aat-E0ouFDFvxY6ofZKg/s1600-h/weezer.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLcj9MYgEJIjbP6lYtPRXLvHELzJMdvRSPffKFDKfgDjER9aMk1QMSPzFQlXFhE87fS51cfLyAPrXn5Qx_2G7LBn_UHIVe6bfLq1kEwyYBUFZ-KYkXyEPWSi0Aat-E0ouFDFvxY6ofZKg/s200/weezer.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231443823546183138" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> He was already dead. Anyway, he got what was coming to him. Doosh.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You sing ‘pork and beans’ in <em>my</em> home, I’ll incinerate you, too.<br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>Not a Workable Thing</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Nice juice box, Xander!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Xander acts like the ten-year old cousin who wants to hang around with the teenage girls.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Owen wants to be with Buffy because she makes him feel alive. That’s a recurrent theme for her, isn’t it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Angel, Spike…Riley?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Homespun just like Owen. Both of them needed to get out more.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> At least Parker just wanted sex. And just the once.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ouch! “It’s not you, it’s me”? “Let’s be friends”?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And his heart breaks…here.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEht-sB6UM0nHml87sL9zgcezqQIM2GT88rPPJDkX5dpzkrbrJOEuyCbo2qvSxA9k8Rl50N2wbg7IjHviPHur1TtCY4OZBsFbR1DW1hQUc9S1jh7qM1JrKrsUvnj7rO3r2spMWjWUY64VEE/s1600-h/its+not+you.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEht-sB6UM0nHml87sL9zgcezqQIM2GT88rPPJDkX5dpzkrbrJOEuyCbo2qvSxA9k8Rl50N2wbg7IjHviPHur1TtCY4OZBsFbR1DW1hQUc9S1jh7qM1JrKrsUvnj7rO3r2spMWjWUY64VEE/s200/its+not+you.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231444848247198738" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Ah, clichés that women push off on men. “I had <em>no idea</em> you felt that way.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “I never meant to lead you on.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “I’m flattered, but...” Nothing good follows that clause.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “Maybe someday, who knows?” That means <em>never, never, never</em>. Unless you get a face transplant and become a millionaire.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So Giles was destined to be a watcher at 10 and he recalls his father’s speech about sacrifice. Didn’t that speech strike you as odd, considering he became the Ripper later?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> A little hypocritical.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And perhaps a bit literal. <em>Sacrifice?</em><br /><br /><hr /><br /><h2><strong>The Anointed One</strong></h2><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh God. Here’s the Master and his stupid blue bone throne again.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They did pick out a creepy looking child to be the Anointed.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I just can’t believe the Anointed One is Punky Brewster.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPaeGNe8ESl3ZVNrSHe_dcmxojPIzwt87DGdBsl0qwMaqHhw24j2T5HOs1OIFnJaQF-9ZgttCuoSEIeBQ6e47FTUUSHMQ7xyDZjg5tY3mMF2q5KF4y0U67Qoj35SfjRXeKqLoF1d4DD50/s1600-h/Anointed.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPaeGNe8ESl3ZVNrSHe_dcmxojPIzwt87DGdBsl0qwMaqHhw24j2T5HOs1OIFnJaQF-9ZgttCuoSEIeBQ6e47FTUUSHMQ7xyDZjg5tY3mMF2q5KF4y0U67Qoj35SfjRXeKqLoF1d4DD50/s200/Anointed.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231446586380605394" /></a><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxc0KAmzY1Sv0L1teN9y-AX_uEDCY5s-1EJtU8mbjj36hTRTKD4fWq98tYpWzVNtxBJfiQM9AnMJRebbAWlwdeHAEcp5-KYYFxo5qYbatLKUASwuuRC7_tEs4drTGWJHALyHRQ8IkDqtU/s1600-h/punky-brewster.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxc0KAmzY1Sv0L1teN9y-AX_uEDCY5s-1EJtU8mbjj36hTRTKD4fWq98tYpWzVNtxBJfiQM9AnMJRebbAWlwdeHAEcp5-KYYFxo5qYbatLKUASwuuRC7_tEs4drTGWJHALyHRQ8IkDqtU/s200/punky-brewster.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5231446584191739986" /></a><br /><br />Next time: “Pack”Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-68829664083681580652008-08-02T20:00:00.000-07:002008-08-02T20:51:08.743-07:00Which Buffy Character Are You?Today we took a well-crafted test that's supposed to tell you which character from the Buffyverse you are. It's called the <a href="http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=17325897279428986557">4-Variable Buffy Personality Test</a> and is definitely worth a look. There is a series of 44 questions which measure morality, passion, spirituality, and selflessness.<br /><br />The results were surprising.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcgW3bdheCOKw_N-Q__e8xn6Lvz_-UqgFYHnVIjwTekpgGl9hdLOAt6pCvrdZpclNDtXHJVIeCnsVCwyrzVL08LjHW7TGiRA9P_NnaFp8qzkHEzWFlzgOrXV_9EzJF4ZO0OK35swMyS1Q/s1600-h/glorificus+lol.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcgW3bdheCOKw_N-Q__e8xn6Lvz_-UqgFYHnVIjwTekpgGl9hdLOAt6pCvrdZpclNDtXHJVIeCnsVCwyrzVL08LjHW7TGiRA9P_NnaFp8qzkHEzWFlzgOrXV_9EzJF4ZO0OK35swMyS1Q/s200/glorificus+lol.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5230127840222296450" /></a><color font=red><strong>HE</strong></color font> is Glorificus.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not really surprised.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This indicates to me the validity of the test. I am <em>fabulous</em>.<br /><br /><font color=silver><em>Glorificus<br />55% amorality, 73% passion, 82% spirituality, 36% selflessness<br /> <br />You probably have a complicated, multi-faceted personality. Kind of like Glory-Ben-Glorificus. <br /><br />Passionate and driven with a spiritual side that comes out at times, a healthy taste for the finer things in life and a willingness to do what's necessary to achieve your ends. You're assertive and have no problems standing up for yourself. And, push come to shove, you're the closest anyone's ever come to straight-up beating the Slayer and her gang.</em> </font color><br /><br /><br /><font color=purple><strong>SHE</strong></font color> is Dawn.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1JLxy7Id04xTwR0XSQX0mARnzzTElrc27tvyGsyeM6WFCpzQcLW8nnAMvFyGstR51WOq0m28GXPTEiyr0dadrJYjgO4atgPkH6saTeQHJuxQsZV_ak7y0jrGcRylBe14FDvG9R6jxRKI/s1600-h/dawn+summers.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1JLxy7Id04xTwR0XSQX0mARnzzTElrc27tvyGsyeM6WFCpzQcLW8nnAMvFyGstR51WOq0m28GXPTEiyr0dadrJYjgO4atgPkH6saTeQHJuxQsZV_ak7y0jrGcRylBe14FDvG9R6jxRKI/s200/dawn+summers.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5230129538153465298" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It kind of makes sense in a way. You always wish, as a woman, you were Buffy. But Dawn has Buffy's DNA, so I'll take it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The whininess doesn't bother you at all?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Nope.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How about the nostrils?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That bothers me. But hey, you're like a boy and a girl, so...<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That's not funny.<br /><br /><font color=silver><em>Dawn Summers<br />55% amorality, 64% passion, 82% spirituality, 64% selflessness<br /> <br />Dawn is a person driven by her love for her friends and her desire to make a difference. Perhaps you are, too. You're willing to do whatever is necessary to do what is right for those you care about, and sometimes this can get you in a little bit of trouble. <br /><br />Most of all, however, you have a heart of gold.<br /><br />Congratulations!</em> </font color>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-43601994075530421752008-08-02T06:56:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:27:01.883-07:00Teacher's Pet“Teacher’s Pet”<br />8/1/08<br /><br />Tonight’s episode, “Teacher’s Pet,” features the first in a long line of troublesome trysts for Alexander Lavelle Harris. (Heh. Lavelle.) Who knows why this is his destiny? Perhaps the gods are frowning on Xander’s godawful choice of shirts.<br /><br /><strong>Science Class</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okey dokey, here we are opening in The Bronze.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUyuY2ZxtqB6PesHL1i9fvLd3OkTkF9h8QOoNPEezKtx53r0cA0sGemURzCSroaUX-8LUYwBeerXl8u0llUzEdrzXCjg0_sjgH7W_zOdTZYQeCo6mnktDg66rpWy5GC6ZxpNke9Urzdao/s1600-h/xander+dream.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUyuY2ZxtqB6PesHL1i9fvLd3OkTkF9h8QOoNPEezKtx53r0cA0sGemURzCSroaUX-8LUYwBeerXl8u0llUzEdrzXCjg0_sjgH7W_zOdTZYQeCo6mnktDg66rpWy5GC6ZxpNke9Urzdao/s200/xander+dream.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229928945385168050" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Clearly a dream sequence here. Everyone loves Slutty Buffy. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I know <em>I </em>do. Xander stakes the vampire, saving Buffy, but did you notice that chair leg hit the vampire in the appendix? Even Dream Xander sucks.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “Read Chapters 6-8.” He’s a great teacher. That means he’s going to DIE.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “I don’t care” about your excuses. I love Dr. Gregory! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He has a doctorate. And he’s teaching high school.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Think he also teaches at UC Sunnydale?<br /><br /><br /><strong>Another Warning</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Check out the silver lamé shirt of the singer.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYfn7eO26d8xjL2oNnPT9hx1c87jDoNgzl9W3SzNYK4gjF4YjaLs4Xdz54B4LX3w1BUnbxbWQwitvFhDVd1xEWw9DjbUa2Q2G0tB7vVyKwECRBaK7z9Zlb5RNTCgFW7s9ItwYJaWyaX8U/s1600-h/ugly+shirt.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYfn7eO26d8xjL2oNnPT9hx1c87jDoNgzl9W3SzNYK4gjF4YjaLs4Xdz54B4LX3w1BUnbxbWQwitvFhDVd1xEWw9DjbUa2Q2G0tB7vVyKwECRBaK7z9Zlb5RNTCgFW7s9ItwYJaWyaX8U/s200/ugly+shirt.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229930242777776690" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s a nice and shiny shirt.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yikes. What do you think of the band?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’d dance to it. It’s hard to think about the band when you’re thinking about Xander’s ugly shirt.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think the lead singer has the right to judge. The sound of the band’s singer got me really hostile. Kind of like Tom Petty meets Billy Corgan.<br /><br />[Original video for Superfine's “Already Met You”...waiting on Google Video to get their act together. Please check back later. It's worth the effort. Or maybe it isn't.]<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Blayne…what kind of a name is Blayne Mall?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s gai.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This episode is directed by Bruce Seth Green…same as…? Think it’s the same guy?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> No. Not the same guy. Not even related.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/rcExSzZF_h0&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/rcExSzZF_h0&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So Angel basically stopped by to give Buffy a leather jacket?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s useless.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And to tell Buffy something she already knows. The Master’s coming!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He doesn’t mention the fork guy. She sees his arm. What is his purpose? I thought he was there to help. All he does is try not to smile at her, and says stuff.<br /><br /><strong>A Killing on Campus</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No one can say that Miss French didn’t warn everybody. First there was the slo-mo walk and the African music. Then she tells us all about praying mantises.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Indeed. She was jonesing on the whole lecture. She probably skipped a few insects just to talk about mantises.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Blayne says: “Guess that’s what they call natural selection.” Ha ha. Couldn’t have that joke on <em>Seventh Heaven</em>. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or <em>Highway to Heaven</em>. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or <em>Touched by an Angel</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or <em>Little House on the Prarie</em>.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Um…<em>Major Dad?</em><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordy discovers the body! Medically prescribed lunch! What do you think her problem is?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s not special enough. What exactly does she need the note for? Permission to put her lunch in the fridge?<span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />She's having a chimichanga?<br /></span><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe there’s stuff with long Latin names in it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like jalapeno peppers? She’s having a chimichanga?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Wow, look! Buffy has been CRYING!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We don’t see Buffy cry very often for someone who died. This may be the first and only time.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She threw up for her mom. Doesn’t that count?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re a charmer, you are.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander says, “We’re on Monster Island.” That’s actually kind of clever.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not just Silverware man. There’s something else beside Silverware man.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Was that what Angel was off fighting last week?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And not winning? Apparently, because he wasn’t around.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He fights the Forces of Forkness so Buffy doesn’t have to. You want the spork? <em>You can’t handle the spork!</em><br /><br /><strong>Claw Guy</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihKHoxkvAo09xnwYaCUdQVCA-kGEt1m90qB7vMhUOeChqZ8Fld1E-qVscuboHYS4Vy93mkcGIKVyXe9bf0MVzE97nyHPX2v3cYSFM7sHeo9bZ_szssz0GF3zKbDt0ElDnXO3FwhE9rYGg/s1600-h/Spork_Labeled.png"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihKHoxkvAo09xnwYaCUdQVCA-kGEt1m90qB7vMhUOeChqZ8Fld1E-qVscuboHYS4Vy93mkcGIKVyXe9bf0MVzE97nyHPX2v3cYSFM7sHeo9bZ_szssz0GF3zKbDt0ElDnXO3FwhE9rYGg/s200/Spork_Labeled.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229931888575605506" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why doesn’t Buff jump over the fence, as on the pilot? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah! And a homeless guy sneaks up on Buffy. What’s the scorecard now?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’ll set one up. Giles, Cordelia, Xander even…this is number four. By the way, how did the bums get into the locked park? Do they have super springy powers?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I think they just stayed in there, and let the police lock them in.<br /><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Claw guy is afraid of the police? because…?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s just a scairdy-vampire. He runs away from Buffy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Miss French frightens him down a manhole. I wonder why that was. Do vampires have a natural aversion to insects?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe her vaginal secretions are hard to get out.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Uh…<em>WHAT?!</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They talked about how they hump you.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> OMG.<br /><br /><strong>The Exorcist Twist</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpboJ4GeXInQkl12FO4ir8pYKN6VkHnoRIs4uy3rnCTeJ5opSHokVWgb1Ccto0lb_16zZAIAEo6B1tnFSv23z4A2BfuU5LDmD9C69Fgbla8NuL-FBPTBrAWVPGuiqaBVhf9HmF6b6EKjQ/s1600-h/mr-bean.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpboJ4GeXInQkl12FO4ir8pYKN6VkHnoRIs4uy3rnCTeJ5opSHokVWgb1Ccto0lb_16zZAIAEo6B1tnFSv23z4A2BfuU5LDmD9C69Fgbla8NuL-FBPTBrAWVPGuiqaBVhf9HmF6b6EKjQ/s200/mr-bean.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229933196337739650" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you notice Buffy’s midriff baring shirt? She needs a belly ring. Why are you looking at me like that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Are they doing that yet in the 90’s?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t remember. All I know is that it’s 1996 and she still has the Lucky Star earrings.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> According to Mr. Flutie, if you repress your feelings, you’ll need a powerful laxative to get it out. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yuck. Mr. Flutie, when he dips his head like that, looks like Mr. Bean.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like a fat Mr. Bean.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Next thing you know, he’ll be running around with a uncooked turkey on his head.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA2lnqn4lo5AxcbumZNun9arkbsSjlkk0n8R94PDiBQikhZQgp0ANH8tI7VtgOCnzDC3sFOsrhVbm2jmWCe6xsZi9J3OnrX5v6vtY54QnSnSZlgpD_UedMtKZCU97H8v9zuxWulUbFQLY/s1600-h/Flutie.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA2lnqn4lo5AxcbumZNun9arkbsSjlkk0n8R94PDiBQikhZQgp0ANH8tI7VtgOCnzDC3sFOsrhVbm2jmWCe6xsZi9J3OnrX5v6vtY54QnSnSZlgpD_UedMtKZCU97H8v9zuxWulUbFQLY/s200/Flutie.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229933435106950242" /></a><br /><br /><br /><font color=yellow>Cordy: I’m not saying we should kill a teacher every day so I can lose weight.</font color><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Great line.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, seven and a half ounces.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s like what, half a pound?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She says used Mercedes still have leather seats. We should all take that to heart.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What does that even <em>mean?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It was her version of…oh, I don’t know.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “I think you meant pollination for number 14.” I bet he did!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> How did no one other than Buffy notice the Exorcist Twist?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> ‘Cause they were all busy taking their pop quiz like good students.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Right. She did say to keep their eyes on their papers.<br /><br /><strong>A Big Bug</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Lavelle is Xander’s middle name?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That explains a lot.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is that like Levar, as in Levar Burton?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe it’s a family name. A family of gay Frenchmen.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> So substitutes have teacher conferences? How come I didn’t go to any?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They didn’t like you?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Thanks, babe.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Miss French has a Tupperware container marked “FOOD.” I guess that’s so she won’t eat something non-food by accident. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When you’re putting bugs on bread…and I guess she eats the bread for fiber…I was really surprised the bugs were still living, because there were no holes punched in it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Bugs can live forever. So the bugs were the protein.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The mayonnaise was for flavor, apparently.<br /><br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Gay gay gay gay gay gay gay.<br /></span><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Willow hacking into the coroner’s office. Hopefully he doesn’t have one of those antiquated systems with the file cabinets and manilla folders like a lot of old crotchety coroners have.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’d like to point out that Willow’s dressing fashionably. I’d also like to point out Xander’s first poor dating choice. Nope, it never gets better.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “I’ve met someone, and you’re jealous,” he tells Buffy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He really is gay.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’re going to town with that word tonight.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What word, gay? Gay gay gay gay gay gay gay.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander asks,“What kind of a girlie name is Angel, anyway?”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> What kind of name is Lavelle?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Wasn’t there a singer named Lavelle?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You’re thinking of <em>Patti LaBelle.</em><br /><br /><strong>Miss French’s Need</strong><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfL_76d1VLZ1iwbA8JDeM7aqviDGyv-Cxs3E-nuP8sXy_mOlhuUKaGC0JK_7z0biDPukUQaTxdvcclRO4EXIYmPyD8wXbIcJ8BCsWvdQhyphenhyphenKU7mLwavxFW4VNU-YsVZaEiRcBkk_smRBc8/s1600-h/musettavander.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfL_76d1VLZ1iwbA8JDeM7aqviDGyv-Cxs3E-nuP8sXy_mOlhuUKaGC0JK_7z0biDPukUQaTxdvcclRO4EXIYmPyD8wXbIcJ8BCsWvdQhyphenhyphenKU7mLwavxFW4VNU-YsVZaEiRcBkk_smRBc8/s320/musettavander.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229934896810535122" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Best shot. To open a scene. Ever. Thank you, show!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you like that, sweetie?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Beyoncé would call that a freakum dress.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s going all out just to lure a teenager. She should have just got naked and answer the door.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> While I agree whole-heartedly with the naked thing, I must protest that she’s clearly a woman of grace and panache.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She knows how to fill a dress.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s down. It took her 30 seconds to get him unconscious on the floor.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Miss French has pioneered the roofie!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why does the roofie help him see her?<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYi2YUUE4llBThpWY0PBN6H_RT6HxpFBQ3JGv9VXi2U4gXax-AyaJtPSHPwOCrv5GMU6FgXFqtrmulPhjutsQY2OxHShwjR1oKFp4MkttYiCe_RiMNFiEeWh4xPQLxRBmMyDa9s44m4gw/s1600-h/jamie+gumb.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYi2YUUE4llBThpWY0PBN6H_RT6HxpFBQ3JGv9VXi2U4gXax-AyaJtPSHPwOCrv5GMU6FgXFqtrmulPhjutsQY2OxHShwjR1oKFp4MkttYiCe_RiMNFiEeWh4xPQLxRBmMyDa9s44m4gw/s200/jamie+gumb.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229937510831592146" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> He sees, but doesn’t care. Then plonk! he wakes up in Jamie Gumb’s basement.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It puts the lotion in the basket.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or else it gets the hose again!<br /><br /><strong>The She-Mantis</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Blayne was All-City; he shouldn’t be such a wussy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He <em>is</em> whiny.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Take your time, Buffy. No one’s going to miss these clowns.<br /><strong><br />Meet Miss French</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> This is the second episode in a row Giles and company go to somebody’s house.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They can take their act on the road. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Later on, everyone seems to barge into Giles’s place.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s karma for you.<br /><br /><br /><strong>Claw Guy Helps Out</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh Claw Guy, don’t you know that vampires should never fight near picket fences?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or chairs.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or loading palettes.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or bathtubs with radios plugged in near them.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or…what?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh look! Xander is ‘moe.’ Oh, noe!<br /><br /><strong>The Mantis Slayer</strong><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv-87uilMpo4aoF-Ouodi1ubR0qouRZ8DHYoLb91XpwGz6D74h7oQQG6RqqNjefHGG_E06Clm5mM_v8VR4bJwYbrATKOIE0DXkv9r0q8IDU5QZ5klaOmGvGIpPlyHmdtpp4YN0b30BaOI/s1600-h/mantis2.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv-87uilMpo4aoF-Ouodi1ubR0qouRZ8DHYoLb91XpwGz6D74h7oQQG6RqqNjefHGG_E06Clm5mM_v8VR4bJwYbrATKOIE0DXkv9r0q8IDU5QZ5klaOmGvGIpPlyHmdtpp4YN0b30BaOI/s320/mantis2.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229938021725583250" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy pushes Xander out of way so she can fight Miss French.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Once again, Xander is useless.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He can’t even escape well.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Their silhouettes are battling on the wall…like the 7th season with the First Slayer picture show.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Good observation.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Thank you. Yes, it was quite nice.<br /><br /><strong>Things Left Behind</strong><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why does Angel look like he’s about to smile all the time?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Doesn’t he know he has to glower, or mope.?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Don’t forget the brooding.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Say, can you name three things in this show that were ‘left behind’?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Dr. Gregory’s glasses.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s one.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Miss French’s eggs.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s two. What about the third one? It’s a stumper!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Um. Are you sure there’s three? I give up.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Angel left his jacket with Buffy! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh yeah. Well, I’ve got a question for you. Whatever happened to the extra eggs? <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Beats me. Maybe the custodians sold them. <br /><br /><br /><br />CORRECTION: An update on the last posting. The music played during the cheerleader tryouts was actually “Twilight Zone” by 2 Unlimited, not C + C Music Factory.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/WJ-OU-MtU7w&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WJ-OU-MtU7w&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Next time: <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/search/label/Never%20Kill%20a%20Boy%20On%20the%20First%20Date">"Never Kill a Boy on the First Date"</a>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-21491005813546333382008-07-28T21:24:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:27:36.166-07:00"Witch"Tonight’s episode, “Witch,” introduces Amy Madison, a peripheral character who first becomes a running joke and later a decidedly bad influence on Willow. Meanwhile, Cordelia begins to hit her stride as the show’s self-involved überbitch, Xander continues his irrelevance, and the mystery of tiny TV gymnasiums is revealed.<br /><br /><strong>Something Normal</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Alright! Cheerleading tryouts! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m nostalgic for cheerleading outfits that look like that.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj68J6CzZxUXwKs_ZDEypl46lcp1CjD6ZMb82yJuydl257mvy2W9JT1hG1VC22tuYTBulwX5l9F-j_G1XjXVadSHiCLG5KLaa2l41iYrm5U4NFuEv4QqB50WHUee9Ijoa43Vm2T4sFDHHc/s1600-h/cordy+cheerleader.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj68J6CzZxUXwKs_ZDEypl46lcp1CjD6ZMb82yJuydl257mvy2W9JT1hG1VC22tuYTBulwX5l9F-j_G1XjXVadSHiCLG5KLaa2l41iYrm5U4NFuEv4QqB50WHUee9Ijoa43Vm2T4sFDHHc/s200/cordy+cheerleader.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228308331738998226" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> With the pleated skirts and…<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Sweaters that cover?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m not. Always be moving forward, that’s my motto.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s because you’re a horndog. You like stripper cheerleaders. And that was Walt Disney’s motto, by the way.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A “yours always” bracelet, Xander? LAME!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But sweet.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> But lame. What was he thinking? That’s the kind of stuff I would have pulled in third grade.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s just not as sophisticated as you are. Of course he didn’t have 200 girlfriends.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Would you just let it go?<br /><br /><font color=yellow>Willow: That girl’s on fire!<br />Cordelia: Enough with the hyperbole!</font color><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love that exchange!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s snooty, but she can actually identify hyperbole.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Back in my day, even the lazy kids could identify hyperbole.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They also delivered milk in the morning. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And they designed microchips during lunch. They certainly wouldn’t have let two crispy stumps get in the way of their dreams like Amber did. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s the music, it’s the music—that kind of music would set me on fire, too. Oh, well. Viva C+C.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Amber’s a loser. I don’t care how stretchy she is. <br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />She's snooty, but she can actually identify hyperbole. <br /></span><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Amy trains six hours a day, and she still sucks.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Cordelia’s right. She's got a destiny.<br /><br /><br /><strong>Not a Vampire Problem</strong><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles waxing lyrical about fiends makes me think of Wesley.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “That’s the thrill of living on the hellmouth.” A definite Wesley moment.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did they model Wesley on early Giles?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe all watchers start out that way. Then their slayers die and they get jaded.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow calls herself and Xander the Slayerettes. This is a nickname that did not stick.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When did they get to the Scoobies?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> No doubt there are people out there who have already parsed that question.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’ll take that as an “I don’t know,” then.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So why did Joyce have those stupid boxes delivered to the HOUSE?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, that made no sense. She’s not parenting, she’s just obsessing over the past. It’s interesting to see how she gets unbusy so she can meddle around in Buffy’s business.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Catherine Madison would have made her go to Slayer Camp.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Slayerlochen? <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Vacation Slayer Study Camp?<br /><br /><strong>The Cheer Queen’s Daughter</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Willow and Amy hung in junior high, but they have some scuff-ups in Season 6, and a big battle in Season 8 (the comic book).<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvIVoAFvAFlnhkb8Hu66s_wIQ-KQQ7vCMN14MCiOEyNUgAwJukXMM_TqR8RDPsOgfG-Ua617i98GNLoFzWGo1O8j0dSxZM18ZCv9UhzgYyLlP4tbZlA_N-aw4ovUIYO__LJQ4q3oadEGU/s1600-h/Evil+Amy.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvIVoAFvAFlnhkb8Hu66s_wIQ-KQQ7vCMN14MCiOEyNUgAwJukXMM_TqR8RDPsOgfG-Ua617i98GNLoFzWGo1O8j0dSxZM18ZCv9UhzgYyLlP4tbZlA_N-aw4ovUIYO__LJQ4q3oadEGU/s200/Evil+Amy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228311200071131298" /></a><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> People drift apart. And change. And become witches, apparently.<br /> <font color=red>HE:</font color> Guess her father wasn't that great an influence.<br /><br /><strong>The Alternates</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> A big locker room threat by Cordelia! Oooowooo!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordelia’s a go-getter. You have to admire her passion.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’s proactive. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander calls Willows “my guy friend that knows about girl stuff.” He’s so clueless. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Poor Willow is like a guy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> With Eddie Munster hair.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Are her clothes fashionable yet? <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You’re asking me? You’re the one who’s always trying to get rid of my clothes!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8QIJmvRlBcpn0WjdksMQp-TYP-G3Cfdsb-U-w8R1RzNb2zGvJOEoRjNVLJVT0SL4FD_CoBIIGqs7yKoY-_ZptUYxrc8JrWSMHyusqmJ-J_163YxLl2sSebkHvoaOnBunqQ0atRKHLhdc/s1600-h/death+to+scrunchies.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8QIJmvRlBcpn0WjdksMQp-TYP-G3Cfdsb-U-w8R1RzNb2zGvJOEoRjNVLJVT0SL4FD_CoBIIGqs7yKoY-_ZptUYxrc8JrWSMHyusqmJ-J_163YxLl2sSebkHvoaOnBunqQ0atRKHLhdc/s200/death+to+scrunchies.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228311695086787490" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Is this the first time a scrunchie has been used in a voodoo ritual?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordy’s scrunchie is the symbol of doom. For Cordy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She becomes blind. I didn’t know you wore them around your eyes.<br /><br /><strong>Great Parenting Form</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Joyce’s outfit looks like she should be talking to HAL the computer on 2001.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t think so. It looked okay. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Now she’s telling her to be on yearbook. As if.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Your daughter never opens a book—why would you think she’d want to be on yearbook?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s not for everybody.<br /><br /><strong>A Curse on Cordelia</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Poor Xander, invisible to both Cordelia and Buffy. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Poor Cordelia! Aren’t you going to rescue your honey? Your secret crush?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It’s just occurred to me that Xander has trimmed his bangs.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s excellent; we can see his eyes now.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> His beady little eyes, as Anya will say.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Cordy can’t control the car. But she gets in the car. But she can’t control the car. But she gets in the car.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I guess she was panicking about going blind. The spell made her foot stompy, too?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or she’s just an incredibly bad driver.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She did flunk driver’s ed twice. And yet later she’s driving a convertible.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I feel bad for Mr. Pole.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA2g9-V-aMUV3942-SQDrDSZqREPghHGVTmtQRG_e_w6PkrHP5cAUX62Aw-aZZtVGe7q4f2ukYPshy1JdTp2vrUGtKHOUjZIgTdUkUFDl4ZCxoNfV6ajz2bX-mo1gicR2DadBVtEXI8gs/s1600-h/aquafortis.gif"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA2g9-V-aMUV3942-SQDrDSZqREPghHGVTmtQRG_e_w6PkrHP5cAUX62Aw-aZZtVGe7q4f2ukYPshy1JdTp2vrUGtKHOUjZIgTdUkUFDl4ZCxoNfV6ajz2bX-mo1gicR2DadBVtEXI8gs/s200/aquafortis.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228312462241639010" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She got saved by Buffy. That’s twice now.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Omigosh, you’re right. Let’s put up a scorecard.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Can do.<br /><br /><strong>The Witch Test</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They’re using <em>aqua fortis</em>. Did you know that I’m an <em>Aqua Fortis</em> man?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Did you know that <em>aqua fortis</em>, or nitric acid, was used by alchemists to dissolve silver? <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> HNO3 way!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes way. Bookbinders also put it on leather to make those marbleized covers.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love Wikipedia. Pretty sneaky how they put the witch test together in the lab.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Aren’t they supposed to be dissecting frogs? What control does that teacher have?<br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />"Mr. Anderson, how do you expect to cheer...<em>without a mouth?</em>" <br /></span><font color=red>HE:</font color> Hey, until the moment the black girl’s mouth gums up, I think he had very good classroom management. Most people were on task, except for Buffy, Willow, and Xander, of course.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They looked busy?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Busy, quiet, either is acceptable. That girl’s mouth gumming up was creepy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s The Matrix! “Mr. Anderson, how do you expect to cheer…<em>without a mouth?”</em><br /><br /><strong>Buffy’s Good Mood</strong><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Here’s Buffy sucking down the orange juice! <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She wants to be a macho man.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Loopy Buffy’s hard to take. And where has Angel been?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m thinking he doesn’t want to be around that.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Isn’t he supposed to be watching out for her?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Maybe he’s scouting the Master. And this whole episode happened during the daytime. Even the basketball game, which I don’t understand.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We also don’t see the Bronze in this episode. Another nighttime-only thing.<br /><br /><br /><strong>Wasted Youth</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I love it when Buffy tells Xander he’s “totally and completely one of the girls.” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>In vino veritas</em>, don’t you know. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And the circle of frustration is complete.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t think he’s even one of the girls. What role does he serve, really? He’s one more lump for Buffy to rescue. Willow’s more useful than he is.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRcUtAgZUdmJ89jQm7KXuF9gm3CgudKdFaEW4NrbIAHnQLgPqcmZ4KXoIpf5OzmPca2hKomRs9x3gEXzQa6kszyku72EjknyEDoLFdICAtEZK3gnK5wwbTmpv5_5YnqmwVJHR3zeLc6FA/s1600-h/giles_citroen1963.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRcUtAgZUdmJ89jQm7KXuF9gm3CgudKdFaEW4NrbIAHnQLgPqcmZ4KXoIpf5OzmPca2hKomRs9x3gEXzQa6kszyku72EjknyEDoLFdICAtEZK3gnK5wwbTmpv5_5YnqmwVJHR3zeLc6FA/s200/giles_citroen1963.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228313863938099314" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Comic relief, then?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> But he’s not funny.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Picks up the pizza?<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Here we get the first look at Giles’s car.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What kind of car was that?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I don’t know. A gray piece of crap. What do I look like, the Blue Book?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “You will shut up and listen to me.” You tell him, Giles!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Why is it that Willow has known Amy all that time, and can’t figure out the switch, but Buffy figures it out in five minutes at the house?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The brownies tell all! Katherine switched the bodies! <span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />The brownies tell all! <br /></span><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Body switching. I love body switching!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Buffy and Faith switched, too. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Willow becomes Warren.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> And Angel switches with that old guy on his show.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles gets transformed into a demon.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think that one should count.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> In any case, Buffy got wasted, and Katherine said Amy’s youth was wasted. Hence the switcheroo.<br /><br /><strong>The Counter-Spell</strong><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The cat scared me.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Why are cats always kept in boxes to jump out at people? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Because it’s scary.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’d imagine they’d be ready to pounce, stuck in a box. There was also a puss-in-the-box in Alien. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s another classic.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlysZt2nYNCH2-CS7ta9bZDnBimgnZ6yk7YGw42hhBVVZgrIh-C_QZdac88hOJLvowh2BLKvTQxa4BbbRnJXnduZrsHdZUOr5F1QsZfrN5-LUvpfoldoGFP2hvC1E7sVfRRsJrh0QOHE0/s1600-h/cat+youre+adopted.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlysZt2nYNCH2-CS7ta9bZDnBimgnZ6yk7YGw42hhBVVZgrIh-C_QZdac88hOJLvowh2BLKvTQxa4BbbRnJXnduZrsHdZUOr5F1QsZfrN5-LUvpfoldoGFP2hvC1E7sVfRRsJrh0QOHE0/s200/cat+youre+adopted.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228315150448262002" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like the shoulder grab.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Or the fog rolling in.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Or the car that won’t start.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “I’ll be right back.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “My flashlight went dead.”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> We watch too many movies.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dang, that is a small gymnasium. It’s like they’re playing in the practice gym. That’s a TV convention. For some reason, you always have a gym with a maximum five bleacher rows.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They can’t fit any more in the camera shot.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “Corsheth and Gilail…Be sated, release the unworthy!” Look, Giles is soaking in it!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I never understood why they didn’t make Giles a warlock. Wouldn’t that have been helpful?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They could have made Xander a warlock.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles would have actually done stuff. Xander, you’d have to have a spin-off for all the horrible things that went wrong. He’s not all that bright.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What would you call it?<br /><span style="float:left;width:110px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />I didn't know the periodic table was so <em>hard!</em> <br /></span><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> <em>The Xander-Giles Comedy Hour</em>?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>The Fresh Wizard of Sunnydale?</em><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Zany. <em>No Time For Sorcerers? That Sorcerer’s Show?</em><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <em>Welcome Back, Moron?</em> <br /><br /><br /><strong>Mother’s Revenge</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Dude! You punched Amy’s mom!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Amy’s mom was not nice. She was mean.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> [Buffy is knocked up against the wall in the science lab.] I didn’t know the periodic table was so <em>hard!</em> Ha ha! Get it?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t know that mirrors could reflect so much. Lasers, spells…<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Did you hear me? I said, “I didn’t know—”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes, yes, I heard you.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles says this was his first casting. HE’S LYING! THE RIPPER IS LYING!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWwCg-a1afR_fYzN2dE2psKpypzNqsRPH2hER_OgXVaQtNT38NEZzqWWFMjxHonYiupunbSFsP6UrtsmQTPB0GeEpTtDBOAoTi_4E9xzW84k11MEizPVn-qppra_KuZ471OyJwzz5Xkcc/s1600-h/giles+id+like+to+test+that+theory.png"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWwCg-a1afR_fYzN2dE2psKpypzNqsRPH2hER_OgXVaQtNT38NEZzqWWFMjxHonYiupunbSFsP6UrtsmQTPB0GeEpTtDBOAoTi_4E9xzW84k11MEizPVn-qppra_KuZ471OyJwzz5Xkcc/s200/giles+id+like+to+test+that+theory.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228306476683972546" /></a><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, I forgot about that. See, he should have been a warlock. He casts his “first” spell and it goes fine. Willow casts one and people lose their minds and don’t know who they are.<br /><br /><strong>A Cheerleader Forever</strong><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> “I don’t get it” says Joyce. That’s her answer. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m sorry. Joyce is in a different episode, and she keeps wandering into this one.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When Joyce is on the screen, I’m thinking, ‘bathroom break.’ And that’s with us watching it on DVD.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I want to get a sandwich. And I’m not even hungry.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Buffy wears a horrible outfit in this scene for some reason. It’s like she got in a fight with the 1970’s and lost.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> You usually love everything she wears.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I know. That’s why it jumped out at me.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNjdjZ4dG0kDrKgtJaEyOk5vN9U-I5bE67S_cvHFRkBYvh3yCGoLct5-SSeCkp6ZW2zry5SLFGQg5jigcvu8DNmsaZUNdYeKq3onOGSGpglefxPsAEDQF_QoHds9edk2BHTirNcSroP80/s1600-h/cheerleading+trophy.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNjdjZ4dG0kDrKgtJaEyOk5vN9U-I5bE67S_cvHFRkBYvh3yCGoLct5-SSeCkp6ZW2zry5SLFGQg5jigcvu8DNmsaZUNdYeKq3onOGSGpglefxPsAEDQF_QoHds9edk2BHTirNcSroP80/s320/cheerleading+trophy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5228319426873541426" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh no, it’s the FREAKY STATUE!<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Love the freaky statue.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Boring view for Catherine.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is she holding her arms out like that forever, too?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> She’ll probably cramp up. What happens to her when the school blows up?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Good question. Hope she likes rubble.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So, you like this episode?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yes. And it’s really fun to watch Season Two with Oz and that trophy. No one ever tells him about it. “Her eyes follow you wherever you go.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I thought it was okay. What’s next?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> “Teacher’s Pet.” That’s the one with Xander and the bug lady.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> …<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Wipe the drool off your chin, sweetie.<br /><br />Next time: <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/08/teachers-pet-season-1-episode-4.html">“Teacher’s Pet”</a>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-39168451446678937872008-07-23T22:25:00.000-07:002008-09-21T16:28:07.003-07:00The Harvest<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRrNi6UeP8OD4e64r1gf1xVpyLrOGHm7jCx4z8vmXxrI79_sm1ObYaUvTqvAe0xKtMZp4Hzba18Q0Bd0d3bj9SwJPxZgTmr3PEt6wqeNOgUnDl6XdYCEs-M6uVXPauJRpH2cgR66RnSmE/s1600-h/Luke+the+vessel.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRrNi6UeP8OD4e64r1gf1xVpyLrOGHm7jCx4z8vmXxrI79_sm1ObYaUvTqvAe0xKtMZp4Hzba18Q0Bd0d3bj9SwJPxZgTmr3PEt6wqeNOgUnDl6XdYCEs-M6uVXPauJRpH2cgR66RnSmE/s200/Luke+the+vessel.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5227187750819512098" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: When last we left Buffy, she was stuck in a crypt with Luke the Vampire about to kill her.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Who’s apparently sensitive to pain because one little crucifix made him have to jump back!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: The crucifix saved her! Thanks, Angel! How’d he know she’d need a crucifix?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Later we learn that the last time Luke didn’t come through on a kill was 1843 Madrid. The end of the Peninsular War.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: How is that possible? He got beat by a crucifix! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Well, he’s evil, so we can also assume he’s lying.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Filthy vampires. You can’t believe a word they say.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0INS_Et_sbpUcDuWQIES1JOUKheHgN4Zl6pPWXsTwDPrTRwT45HGn-QiYqItm8ebFHasar_UpfjiU6X1rHRjHMWuIjzDiYepeFU3oRG-XuZ9FRqR6xVtVzDJVNXeinzjCwhvfRnFinZw/s1600-h/harvest+buffy.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0INS_Et_sbpUcDuWQIES1JOUKheHgN4Zl6pPWXsTwDPrTRwT45HGn-QiYqItm8ebFHasar_UpfjiU6X1rHRjHMWuIjzDiYepeFU3oRG-XuZ9FRqR6xVtVzDJVNXeinzjCwhvfRnFinZw/s200/harvest+buffy.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5226453955507918178" /></a><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Cemetery a lot foggier back then! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: In other episodes they moved the ocean so it wasn’t so foggy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Weather patterns in Sunnydale are unpredictable.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: The shot of the spinning globe is a nice touch in this library scene. Welcome to the World of Tomorrow! Here at the World’s Fair at Sunnydale. I half expected to see the little black and white plane fly around it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Giles is explaining about demons again.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: The last demon to leave this dimension bit someone on the way out? And that’s how we got vampires? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Contrary to popular mythology, the world started out really bad. So stop complaining, everybody!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: But isn’t that a spoilsport thing for the demons to do? We gotta go, but here’s something to remember us by. Smell you later!<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: They’ve brought Jesse to the Master. Who apparently has cabin fever. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: I still don’t get why Darla doesn’t even get scratched for biting him first.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Well, it is sort of a bummer knowing that you have something waiting for you in the fridge and someone beats you to it. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: She said his blood was really pure. What did she mean by that? <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Virgin blood? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Can they taste that?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: They can smell fear, so why not taste virginity? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Can they see melancholy?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Hear ambivalence? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Touch, um…I got nothing. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Here’s Willow hacking into the plans of the city’s electrical system. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: That’s a useful skill. The team is forming up. Xander tags along, and doesn’t listen. Willow finds even more information and helps Giles.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Yes, a pattern is developing early. I think Xander’s obstinance has something to do with his mushroom shirt. <br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />They're clearly toadstools. <br /></span><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Sure they’re not jellyfish?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: No, look. They’re clearly toadstools. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: They looked like jellyfish.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: But they weren’t jellyfish. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: I’m just saying.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Ah, Giles the Luddite. “This dread machine” he says. Doesn’t he know you can use the computer to get porn? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Probably not.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Perhaps there’s just something about the feel of a brown paper wrapper. I can talk about this all night. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: We know. I’d like to point out that willow does not have fashionable clothes yet.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-ABswfb3nATZf3o-5NTLmjuZsmVh4X5PvET9_Ivi2OFaxE7TP3uiBHkx3WW3PWWhfdpvBAATDGuOCsGqmmMjUMI7vOq4caFBdEz-r5rgyydXdYzzSJs0yye3YYd1KJdTb3n5BK5g3DMY/s1600-h/sunnydale+hs.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-ABswfb3nATZf3o-5NTLmjuZsmVh4X5PvET9_Ivi2OFaxE7TP3uiBHkx3WW3PWWhfdpvBAATDGuOCsGqmmMjUMI7vOq4caFBdEz-r5rgyydXdYzzSJs0yye3YYd1KJdTb3n5BK5g3DMY/s200/sunnydale+hs.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5226458146804584242" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Principal Flutie…if it’s a closed campus, then why are the gates wide open? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Indeed.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: He locks the doors like Morgan Freeman in that <em>Stand by Me</em> movie. You can’t do that. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: You can’t do that to a building. It’s not like the fire marshal’s worried about the quad catching on fire.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Well, it is southern California. Everything catches on fire there.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Boing! Buffy jumps over a 10-foot fence. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: She looks to see if anyone noticed. If you’re going to do a superhuman feat like that, wouldn’t you look before to make sure no one sees?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: She doesn’t do that much anymore, the giant leaps. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Some of these tricks she gets out of the way and never does again.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Maybe the slayer loses her vertical once she gets older.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Why Angel doesn’t stop the Harvest? “‘Cause I’m afraid.” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: He only starts helping out because he’s in love with her? That’s kind of shallow. This early Angel is contradictory.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: All part of the “cryptic wise man act.” Or maybe he had his doubts and didn’t want to help. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: No, he’s just being lazy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Stop the apocalypse and you save a man’s life, teach a man how to stop the apocalypse, and… <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: …the apocalypse is still stopped, but no thanks to you.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: And now Xander gets the jump on her. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: She’s not very good with mortals. I have the feeling I could get the jump on her, if I just walk up behind her without saying anything first.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: When you get near Buffy, you really have to stomp your feet and yell “Here I come, Buffy! Here I come!” or you’re going to get a crushed trachea or something. How’d Xander get off campus, anyway? Dig a tunnel? You know he can’t jump over the fence <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Well, he’s not new. You know he knows how to get out of the school.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: He’s got street smarts. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Xander does? He’s got a sense of honor. Well, a sense that he’s right, anyway.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Look at the illustration of the Harvest in the book--The Master: pull my finger!I say pull my finger because it looks like he’s asking that guy to pull his finger. Did you think it looked like he was asking him to pull his finger? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: No.<br /><br /><span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Who gave you permission to exist? <br /></span><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Yay, it’s Harmony! And here’s Cordelia dissing Buffy in the Computer Lab. Very realistic.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: “Who gave you permission to exist! “ I love that line. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: That’s mean! <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Silly Cordelia. DEL does not stand for Deliver. Fortunately on your computer it has the entire word on the key. Although one might get a little confused by Num Lk. Numb Lick?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Alt. Altimatum?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: You know, you google ‘alt’ and MILF-finder comes up.<span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Namby pamby. That's fun to say. <br /></span><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: MILF-finder? [groans] Aw, not MILF’s again. But here we see Willow’s not completely wishy-washy and namby-pamby.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Namby pamby. That’s fun to say.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Namby pamby.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Namby pamby namby pamby namby pamby. Whee!<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: How does Buffy not get that door shut. Why does she need Xander’s help?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: She can break a doorknob off a door, but she needs Xander to help her shut it. I guess her superpowers are entrance only.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Maybe she was throwing Xander a bone.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Making him feel like he was a help?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: She should’ve come down hard on him in this episode. Say, “Yeah. You are useless.” She could’ve saved herself seven years of hassle. That door’s twisting off like the wrapper to a microwave meal.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: What is her problem with this door?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Now they’re going out the manhole cover. Grab her leg, grab her leg, YES! Did you see that one coming? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: I liked it. It’s a classic. You got to respect the classics.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSh6XlRsVJQZlRH14M-LgD0Z6jdfhVw1xikPXwQ-dJRdqgtoRiIGWuvo6m4dWKGBD1Cr6f7CuB1cPvuvCyobNLyETBEQ17M2wTj3h75RF6RxFX3S8wIxXqxz1PzxKbF8Y7sKkRvzf2osc/s1600-h/henry_rollins.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSh6XlRsVJQZlRH14M-LgD0Z6jdfhVw1xikPXwQ-dJRdqgtoRiIGWuvo6m4dWKGBD1Cr6f7CuB1cPvuvCyobNLyETBEQ17M2wTj3h75RF6RxFX3S8wIxXqxz1PzxKbF8Y7sKkRvzf2osc/s200/henry_rollins.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5227187958095470322" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Colin fails the Master, he dies. Darla steals his snack, and she gets a pass. I don’t get it.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Maybe because she’s vamped out all the time. The Master probably respects her commitment.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Yeah, because the Master is quite hideous. He’s probably intimidated by good-looking people. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Luke looks like Henry Rollins all vamped out. It’s the black t-shirt.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: I think he looks like Joe Piscopo, the muscular comic from SNL. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: You are old.<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYbb9k0Pbh1T0YFLDDCmy2Q4b_D2w-5Z_kwoO-y0dJJ3_L4tl6uArlj9pgxFDwzaNLlN5MSA4OOEB93K4O5k6w4oJ5sof8ZQumuBTVV_h0Ivk16ag8DCOfc5Zx66o6Gl3tpAiVf6TRvD8/s1600-h/Joe_Piscopo.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYbb9k0Pbh1T0YFLDDCmy2Q4b_D2w-5Z_kwoO-y0dJJ3_L4tl6uArlj9pgxFDwzaNLlN5MSA4OOEB93K4O5k6w4oJ5sof8ZQumuBTVV_h0Ivk16ag8DCOfc5Zx66o6Gl3tpAiVf6TRvD8/s200/Joe_Piscopo.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5227188229528575538" /></a><br /> <br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7v6vXOdU21BxSz4ILSxyu4cgt-RPnUfEbgPsweLz7G3_ZMQpnMlUk9yjzTNio8SRfT7puaiHBY5NK33ZFIPYa86o8w9PVWeD1-_e3xeSVh_16eDmI8xU9COebEWh6sV9NVwCZWIC1gdM/s1600-h/One_Time_at_Band_Camp.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7v6vXOdU21BxSz4ILSxyu4cgt-RPnUfEbgPsweLz7G3_ZMQpnMlUk9yjzTNio8SRfT7puaiHBY5NK33ZFIPYa86o8w9PVWeD1-_e3xeSVh_16eDmI8xU9COebEWh6sV9NVwCZWIC1gdM/s200/One_Time_at_Band_Camp.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5226467108497932434" /></a><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Luke: “My body is your instrument.” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Ew!<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: “One time, at Vampire Band Camp…” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Make sure the Master cleans out your spit valve.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Snort! Good one.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Bam! Xander kicks the recycling bin! <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: That’s like you when you get angry.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Ha ha. He says, “I don’t like vampires.” Angel and Spike, watch out! It kind of fits in with Xander’s latent homosexuality. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: He doesn’t like campies because he wants them to do him?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: No, he’s upset about Jesse. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Here’s the reveal about the Hellmouth. The Hellmouth is a bunghole, and the Master is the stopper. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: I’d buy that. You were the stopper in that one bunghole that one time.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: You’re hilarious when you put your mind to it. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Whatever, stopper.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: I don’t think that the parenting tapes Joyce listens to are all that effective. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: You know, part of her role as a parent is to be realistic to the teenage mind by appearing to be dumb. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Well, they can’t all be the fathers from Seventh Heaven, you know. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Huh. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: God, I’m clever.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Joyce says, “It’s not the end of the world.” Love that line. Because, silly woman, it is the end of the world.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Meanwhile, Joyce went downstairs to get the Irony Casserole out of the oven.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Are those communion wafers? You’re not supposed to take those from the church. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: You’re really not. How do you use communion wafers to fight evil?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: You could pin the vampire to the floor and make him eat them, I guess. Or give him a sandwich with a wafer hidden in it. You could hurl them at him like ninja throwing stars. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: I’m thinking I’m not reaching for the wafers if there’s other stuff in the trunk…like a stake.<br /><br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br /><em>Hello</em>, Miss Motormouth? <br /></span><font color=red>HE:</font color>: I love the little throw-off lines Cordelia has…”Hello, Miss Motormouth? Can I finish a sentence?” <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: You’re in love with Cordelia.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Yes, I really am. <br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Darla and her group just walk around all vamped out.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: You’d think she was a newbie vampire.<br />Dashboard Prophets<br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/pf_htu-TMww&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/pf_htu-TMww&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Here’s Luke up on stage, holding his lapels like a mayor from a Dick Van Dyke musical. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: How weird. Showing his age.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Before Buffy showed up, he was about to do the happy prospector dance. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Alright! Luke-Buffy, Round 2. Dropped her spike! Tossed into boxes! She really hasn’t adjusted her strategy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Headbutt! That was new. Sneaky sneaky.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: I love the way Jesse is dispatched [bumped by a fleeing clubber into a petrified Xander, who is holding a stake]. I guess that counts as a kill. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: I love the shot of Buffy after she’s killed Luke. She looks awesome and tough.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Don’t they end up using that shot on the opening?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8yX5uYI0wF5MYS5toPZco14WaP0zP6-4zvFHnuAXBX0qfRHm1ZqR9gu6msU2gJ9jkmVeBM6dWD-uTh8D66xONupJDFEDN2rJ9vSA6ZUQ2scubUlvd_0iK-yYUBGgLr3MUsWXf-VxDBgI/s1600-h/suckers.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8yX5uYI0wF5MYS5toPZco14WaP0zP6-4zvFHnuAXBX0qfRHm1ZqR9gu6msU2gJ9jkmVeBM6dWD-uTh8D66xONupJDFEDN2rJ9vSA6ZUQ2scubUlvd_0iK-yYUBGgLr3MUsWXf-VxDBgI/s200/suckers.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5226470045747511698" /></a> <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Looks like Buffy is sucking the sucker she sucks when Angel sees her for the first time. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Really? The same sucker?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Well, a sucker. Giles says the next threat might be something different from vampires. What’s the next episode? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: Witch.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: The next one. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color>: No, the name of the episode is Witch.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color>: Oh yeah, right.Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5131878512415853271.post-71689372363782953402008-07-18T23:26:00.001-07:002008-09-21T16:28:32.168-07:00Welcome to the HellmouthWe are a married couple who thoroughly love the Whedonverse, in particular <em>Buffy the Vampire Slayer</em>. The mission (the only thing that matters, ha ha) of <strong>Hellmouth Follies</strong> is to present our take on the show. Our ultimate goal is to go through all seven seasons. Gently judge our blog! Here goes! <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay, so we’ve watched it. Again. For the how manieth time?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> This is the third time I’ve seen it.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The opening is weird. Isn’t Giles supposed to be doing the speech?<br /><br /><span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />Aren't most girls their own monsters? <br /></span><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Joss misdirects in the first scene. <br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I know this scene is meant to catch us offguard by having the virginal female turn out to be the monster, but I still feel like it was a lot of work for Darla to go through.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> It’s not about a poor girl being attacked by a monster, but aren’t most girls their own monsters?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Like on <em>Bridezilla</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How do you know that?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Buffy in bed.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She looks great. So young, and a bit on the chubby side.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yes, very nice. I would be very baffled by these dreams, though. Sure, I’d wake up terrified and everything, but I’d also be thinking, “Huh?”<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Her hair looks fabulous. She wore it down during the day, and up at the Bronze.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Because that’s really when she goes to work. And she looks like a brunette.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She gets blonder and blonder as time goes on.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Xander wiping out on a skateboard. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do you ever see Xander on a skateboard again? I don’t think you do.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He probably can’t see through those bangs.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That stake looks huge. I think the stakes get smaller, too.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They had a bigger budget later. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They bought a stake sharpener.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Things get smaller, like cell phones.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> And Buffy, as I said earlier.<br /><span style="float:right;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />They bought a stake sharpener. <br /></span><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What about this Jesse guy?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He looks like he’s a major character. He shows up in the second scene. The fact that I can’t remember him at all indicates to me he will be dead soon.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The writers even give him some clever dialogue. They hardly ever do that. I read that had it not been for budget constraints, they would have put Jesse in the opening credit montage, just to throw us off.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Joss Whedon is just mean.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Bob Flutie, the first of many principals.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Actually, Sunnydale High just goes through two.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Oh. It seemed like more. By the way, I hear ‘Flutie,’ and I think of Doug Flutie, the dwarf NFL quarterback.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That means nothing to me.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> How old was Charisma Carpenter when she was on this show? When she reaches to shake Buffy’s hand, her hand looks old.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> One thing I noticed was that SMG looks better and better. CC, through this series and <em>Angel</em>, not so much. Her hair looks good here, though.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> SMG was 20 when she was playing Buffy. She looks 14.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> The teacher is teaching about the Black Plague. Classes always serve the purposes of the plotwagon somehow. And have you noticed that teachers on TV always seem surprised by the bell?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Do you teach up to the bell?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I’m not in mid-sentence when it rings. I tell my students that I can read a clock, too; they don’t have to tell me what time it is.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Okay, what do you think about vampire nail polish?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I’m not sure what it is.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> James Spader?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Ehn.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Frappacinos?<TABLE WIDTH="200" STYLE="filter:glow(color='purple')"><TR><TD><big>SHE: I like Frappacinos.</big></TD></TR></TABLE><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> John Tesh? <em>Is</em> he the devil?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah, I think he is.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I don’t think you would have passed Cordy’s Coolness test. That doesn’t seem to bother you.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s the body falling out of the locker. look at how that girl is freaking out.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Later in the show they think, “Oh, today must be Tuesday.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They did become mordantly jaded in a hurry. Sign of the times, I guess.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> When did Willow cut her hair? The same time she got hip clothes?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I can’t remember. Are those extensions? <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> From what I understand, her lack of coolness was intentional, and the networks said,”No, she can’t dress like that. She has to have fashionable clothes.”<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Sets are usually cold, so having those wool clothes must have been nice.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I didn’t know that. How did you know that?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Staring at breasts, mostly.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Oh. Ee. You’re weird.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Buffy breaking into the lockerroom. First time we see her superpowers.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’s not comfortable with it, though.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Probably because she’d have to pay for the door.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I mean physically. She doesn’t know her own strength.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Giles has a really cool book.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It says “VAMPYR” on it. It’s from her dream.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You know what’s weird? They didn’t have better communication. She had one watcher, and he bit it. Giles knew she was coming. That’s his approach--chasing after her with a big fat vampire book?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He must have went to the Windham-Pryce School of Watching.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> I thought the Watcher’s Council was supposed to be organized.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They should have called ahead. But Giles doesn’t like technology.<span style="float:left;width:100px;margin-top:5px;margin-left:5px;margin-right:5px;padding:10px;border:1px solid black;background:#C0C0C0;color:black;font-size:14px;"> <br />They should have called ahead. <br /></span><br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Here’s Xander overhearing because Willow sent him to the library for a Trig book.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They usually keep those things in the Math Office. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> You don’t see people using the library during the series that much.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> I believe they call that verisimilitude. <br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s the underground lair of the Master. Why are all these vampires walking around vamped out?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe they don’t know when he’s coming, and they want to look prepared.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Yeah, like an inspection tour.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Jesus is coming, look busy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> In the early days of the show, I remember the vampires vamping out at the slightest provocation.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> They became flaccid as the series went on.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Angel and Buffy’s first meeting—foot to chest.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> That’s just foreshadowing. And why does he remind me of Angelus there? When does he smile again in the series?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> It is an uncommon occurrence. Buffy says she doesn’t want another friend, and he says, “I didn’t say I was yours.” What? Then whose?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Doyle maybe?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> They’re friends? I wish I knew what he was talking about.<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Giles going on about zombies, werewolves, incubi, succubi..<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He doesn’t mention the hyena people or bug people.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> He hasn’t got to that chapter yet. It’s interesting that Buffy refuses the call in the library. It’s like the whole Joseph Campbell Hero of a Thousand Faces thing where the hero has to initially refuse the call before setting out on the adventure. But what prompts her into action?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He distracts her by talking about vampires. And then she sees Willow in danger with a vampire.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivMJGLH8UkwawgT1pOkQjPRRf8Nu3NmfQHbJFXmM8AtYt86bKML0blQftffOMc5HM2_RBjPIAMAXxGkF7qd5yt7znTONQYBEBWmPKfoB2NX_XSJfrI98xxn72rRBT_FVP_8Pp9wD_Nr2s/s1600-h/spike+buffy+catwalk.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivMJGLH8UkwawgT1pOkQjPRRf8Nu3NmfQHbJFXmM8AtYt86bKML0blQftffOMc5HM2_RBjPIAMAXxGkF7qd5yt7znTONQYBEBWmPKfoB2NX_XSJfrI98xxn72rRBT_FVP_8Pp9wD_Nr2s/s200/spike+buffy+catwalk.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5226083315348168514" /></a><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> When they’re on the catwalk, with Giles saying “look at them, completely oblivious to the danger around them,” it reminds me of later on when Spike makes Buffy watch her friends as they’re, you know. That catwalk gets a lot of action. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Spike fought a vampire he sired up there. And Willow and Amy had their magicathon up there. I'm sure there's others.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> What do you think of the band?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> The “clown hair” guys? I thought they were a good band. Giles’s taste in music is inconsistent. He has some folksy acoustic guitar moments, but Oz goes through his record collection and thoroughly approves of everything. He was more stereotypically stodgy here.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> We haven’t seen the Ripper yet.<br /><br />SPRUNG MONKEY INTERLUDE<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/yVg5_gCeBRQ&hl=en"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/yVg5_gCeBRQ&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Here’s Buffy, almost killing Cordelia.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> She’ll wish she’d killed Cordelia over and over in later episodes.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> So far, both Giles and Cordy have snuck up on Buffy in this episode, but she still gets the drop on Angel. Either they’re super stealthy (smirk) or the “helper of the helpless” is super-clumsy.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Maybe he had change in his pockets. Or that crucifix necklace is really jangly.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> <a href="http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://i31.twenga.com/3/tp/02/27/137040227.png&imgrefurl=http://www.twenga.co.uk/dir-Jewellery,Necklace,Various-necklace/Shape-Cross-1-31420&h=100&w=100&sz=4&hl=en&start=13&um=1&tbnid=vbztBR-vbmsgfM:&tbnh=82&tbnw=82&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbuffy%2527s%2Bcrucifix%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26safe%3Doff%26sa%3DN">You can buy that crucifix on the Internet</a>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Yeah. So why don’t I already have one?<br /><br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, we’ve got to talk about The Master.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWgGXyT47rbgiPEu9tNQ-9mfzO3pWjE7b4ntvFGg7RBA2kWPIFvaNMvtve1VdtPaBCYSPeNw6ipTjTPLhrPqXDZ6I9-dET0fb41Yob-qLnghvn6VWymbDL79PtuGC1QdffpUC5lDB5-LU/s1600-h/the+master.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWgGXyT47rbgiPEu9tNQ-9mfzO3pWjE7b4ntvFGg7RBA2kWPIFvaNMvtve1VdtPaBCYSPeNw6ipTjTPLhrPqXDZ6I9-dET0fb41Yob-qLnghvn6VWymbDL79PtuGC1QdffpUC5lDB5-LU/s200/the+master.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5226084597859139010" /></a> <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Not very scary.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Pretentious nickname. What do you think about the costume?<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Like a dominatrix. Only a guy.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> That’s a damn shiny beltbuckle he has there. I think the jacket makes him look like a dictator from the Asian Subcontinent.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> He’s probably getting foreign aid from us right now.<br /><br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Here’s the ultimate scene. She’s kind of shot herself in the foot running off from Giles. “One vampire I can handle,” she says. Then it turns out to be more than one. And I thought Darla was more fierce.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Well, Darla does manage to get some good shots in on her. This Luke guy is kicking the crap out of her, though.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Is it psychological? Maybe Buffy doesn’t like being held up by the neck.<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Lost in this is the fact that the Scoobies now know what’s going on. <br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> To be continued. I honestly don’t remember how she gets out of this. Do you?<br /><font color=red>HE:</font color> Negative. Guess we’ll have to watch “The Harvest.” That title makes me think of <em>Children of the Corn</em>.<br /><font color=purple>SHE:</font color> Grr. Arrgh.<br /><br />Coming up: <a href="http://hellmouthfollies.blogspot.com/2008/07/harvest.html">"The Harvest."</a>Bernard Sellhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05261786720194539616noreply@blogger.com1