The Harvest

HE:: When last we left Buffy, she was stuck in a crypt with Luke the Vampire about to kill her.
SHE:: Who’s apparently sensitive to pain because one little crucifix made him have to jump back!
HE:: The crucifix saved her! Thanks, Angel! How’d he know she’d need a crucifix?
SHE:: Later we learn that the last time Luke didn’t come through on a kill was 1843 Madrid. The end of the Peninsular War.
HE:: How is that possible? He got beat by a crucifix!
SHE:: Well, he’s evil, so we can also assume he’s lying.
HE:: Filthy vampires. You can’t believe a word they say.

HE:: Cemetery a lot foggier back then!
SHE:: In other episodes they moved the ocean so it wasn’t so foggy.
HE:: Weather patterns in Sunnydale are unpredictable.

HE:: The shot of the spinning globe is a nice touch in this library scene. Welcome to the World of Tomorrow! Here at the World’s Fair at Sunnydale. I half expected to see the little black and white plane fly around it.
SHE:: Giles is explaining about demons again.
HE:: The last demon to leave this dimension bit someone on the way out? And that’s how we got vampires?
SHE:: Contrary to popular mythology, the world started out really bad. So stop complaining, everybody!
HE:: But isn’t that a spoilsport thing for the demons to do? We gotta go, but here’s something to remember us by. Smell you later!

HE:: They’ve brought Jesse to the Master. Who apparently has cabin fever.
SHE:: I still don’t get why Darla doesn’t even get scratched for biting him first.
HE:: Well, it is sort of a bummer knowing that you have something waiting for you in the fridge and someone beats you to it.
SHE:: She said his blood was really pure. What did she mean by that?
HE:: Virgin blood?
SHE:: Can they taste that?
HE:: They can smell fear, so why not taste virginity?
SHE:: Can they see melancholy?
HE:: Hear ambivalence?
SHE:: Touch, um…I got nothing.

HE:: Here’s Willow hacking into the plans of the city’s electrical system.
SHE:: That’s a useful skill. The team is forming up. Xander tags along, and doesn’t listen. Willow finds even more information and helps Giles.
HE:: Yes, a pattern is developing early. I think Xander’s obstinance has something to do with his mushroom shirt.

They're clearly toadstools.
SHE:: Sure they’re not jellyfish?
HE:: No, look. They’re clearly toadstools.
SHE:: They looked like jellyfish.
HE:: But they weren’t jellyfish.
SHE:: I’m just saying.

HE:: Ah, Giles the Luddite. “This dread machine” he says. Doesn’t he know you can use the computer to get porn?
SHE:: Probably not.
HE:: Perhaps there’s just something about the feel of a brown paper wrapper. I can talk about this all night.
SHE:: We know. I’d like to point out that willow does not have fashionable clothes yet.

HE:: Principal Flutie…if it’s a closed campus, then why are the gates wide open?
SHE:: Indeed.
HE:: He locks the doors like Morgan Freeman in that Stand by Me movie. You can’t do that.
SHE:: You can’t do that to a building. It’s not like the fire marshal’s worried about the quad catching on fire.
HE:: Well, it is southern California. Everything catches on fire there.

HE:: Boing! Buffy jumps over a 10-foot fence.
SHE:: She looks to see if anyone noticed. If you’re going to do a superhuman feat like that, wouldn’t you look before to make sure no one sees?
HE:: She doesn’t do that much anymore, the giant leaps.
SHE:: Some of these tricks she gets out of the way and never does again.
HE:: Maybe the slayer loses her vertical once she gets older.

HE:: Why Angel doesn’t stop the Harvest? “‘Cause I’m afraid.”
SHE:: He only starts helping out because he’s in love with her? That’s kind of shallow. This early Angel is contradictory.
HE:: All part of the “cryptic wise man act.” Or maybe he had his doubts and didn’t want to help.
SHE:: No, he’s just being lazy.
HE:: Stop the apocalypse and you save a man’s life, teach a man how to stop the apocalypse, and…
SHE:: …the apocalypse is still stopped, but no thanks to you.

HE:: And now Xander gets the jump on her.
SHE:: She’s not very good with mortals. I have the feeling I could get the jump on her, if I just walk up behind her without saying anything first.
HE:: When you get near Buffy, you really have to stomp your feet and yell “Here I come, Buffy! Here I come!” or you’re going to get a crushed trachea or something. How’d Xander get off campus, anyway? Dig a tunnel? You know he can’t jump over the fence
SHE:: Well, he’s not new. You know he knows how to get out of the school.
HE:: He’s got street smarts.
SHE:: Xander does? He’s got a sense of honor. Well, a sense that he’s right, anyway.

HE:: Look at the illustration of the Harvest in the book--The Master: pull my finger!I say pull my finger because it looks like he’s asking that guy to pull his finger. Did you think it looked like he was asking him to pull his finger?
SHE:: No.


Who gave you permission to exist?
SHE:: Yay, it’s Harmony! And here’s Cordelia dissing Buffy in the Computer Lab. Very realistic.
HE:: “Who gave you permission to exist! “ I love that line.
SHE:: That’s mean!
HE:: Silly Cordelia. DEL does not stand for Deliver. Fortunately on your computer it has the entire word on the key. Although one might get a little confused by Num Lk. Numb Lick?
SHE:: Alt. Altimatum?
HE:: You know, you google ‘alt’ and MILF-finder comes up.
Namby pamby. That's fun to say.

SHE:: MILF-finder? [groans] Aw, not MILF’s again. But here we see Willow’s not completely wishy-washy and namby-pamby.
HE:: Namby pamby. That’s fun to say.
SHE:: Namby pamby.
HE:: Namby pamby namby pamby namby pamby. Whee!

HE:: How does Buffy not get that door shut. Why does she need Xander’s help?
SHE:: She can break a doorknob off a door, but she needs Xander to help her shut it. I guess her superpowers are entrance only.
HE:: Maybe she was throwing Xander a bone.
SHE:: Making him feel like he was a help?
HE:: She should’ve come down hard on him in this episode. Say, “Yeah. You are useless.” She could’ve saved herself seven years of hassle. That door’s twisting off like the wrapper to a microwave meal.
SHE:: What is her problem with this door?
HE:: Now they’re going out the manhole cover. Grab her leg, grab her leg, YES! Did you see that one coming?
SHE:: I liked it. It’s a classic. You got to respect the classics.


HE:: Colin fails the Master, he dies. Darla steals his snack, and she gets a pass. I don’t get it.
SHE:: Maybe because she’s vamped out all the time. The Master probably respects her commitment.
HE:: Yeah, because the Master is quite hideous. He’s probably intimidated by good-looking people.
SHE:: Luke looks like Henry Rollins all vamped out. It’s the black t-shirt.
HE:: I think he looks like Joe Piscopo, the muscular comic from SNL.
SHE:: You are old.


HE:: Luke: “My body is your instrument.”
SHE:: Ew!
HE:: “One time, at Vampire Band Camp…”
SHE:: Make sure the Master cleans out your spit valve.
HE:: Snort! Good one.

HE:: Bam! Xander kicks the recycling bin!
SHE:: That’s like you when you get angry.
HE:: Ha ha. He says, “I don’t like vampires.” Angel and Spike, watch out! It kind of fits in with Xander’s latent homosexuality.
SHE:: He doesn’t like campies because he wants them to do him?
HE:: No, he’s upset about Jesse.

HE:: Here’s the reveal about the Hellmouth. The Hellmouth is a bunghole, and the Master is the stopper.
SHE:: I’d buy that. You were the stopper in that one bunghole that one time.
HE:: You’re hilarious when you put your mind to it.
SHE:: Whatever, stopper.

HE:: I don’t think that the parenting tapes Joyce listens to are all that effective.
SHE:: You know, part of her role as a parent is to be realistic to the teenage mind by appearing to be dumb.
HE:: Well, they can’t all be the fathers from Seventh Heaven, you know.
SHE:: Huh.
HE:: God, I’m clever.

SHE:: Joyce says, “It’s not the end of the world.” Love that line. Because, silly woman, it is the end of the world.
HE:: Meanwhile, Joyce went downstairs to get the Irony Casserole out of the oven.

HE:: Are those communion wafers? You’re not supposed to take those from the church.
SHE:: You’re really not. How do you use communion wafers to fight evil?
HE:: You could pin the vampire to the floor and make him eat them, I guess. Or give him a sandwich with a wafer hidden in it. You could hurl them at him like ninja throwing stars.
SHE:: I’m thinking I’m not reaching for the wafers if there’s other stuff in the trunk…like a stake.


Hello, Miss Motormouth?
HE:: I love the little throw-off lines Cordelia has…”Hello, Miss Motormouth? Can I finish a sentence?”
SHE:: You’re in love with Cordelia.
HE:: Yes, I really am.

SHE:: Darla and her group just walk around all vamped out.
HE:: You’d think she was a newbie vampire.
Dashboard Prophets

HE:: Here’s Luke up on stage, holding his lapels like a mayor from a Dick Van Dyke musical.
SHE:: How weird. Showing his age.
HE:: Before Buffy showed up, he was about to do the happy prospector dance.

HE:: Alright! Luke-Buffy, Round 2. Dropped her spike! Tossed into boxes! She really hasn’t adjusted her strategy.
SHE:: Headbutt! That was new. Sneaky sneaky.
HE:: I love the way Jesse is dispatched [bumped by a fleeing clubber into a petrified Xander, who is holding a stake]. I guess that counts as a kill.
SHE:: I love the shot of Buffy after she’s killed Luke. She looks awesome and tough.
HE:: Don’t they end up using that shot on the opening?

HE:: Looks like Buffy is sucking the sucker she sucks when Angel sees her for the first time.
SHE:: Really? The same sucker?
HE:: Well, a sucker. Giles says the next threat might be something different from vampires. What’s the next episode?
SHE:: Witch.
HE:: The next one.
SHE:: No, the name of the episode is Witch.
HE:: Oh yeah, right.